Sounds like you are getting the fighting/protective mommie person back. Remember who has your back at all times.

"If God is for me,then who can be against me"

Blessings ,keep us updated so we will know how to pray.

I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so sorry.:(

I am taking your comment to mean that you too have a loved one with an eating disorder. I am so sorry to hear that. Is your loved one able to get help or are your experiences like ours? I pray that he/she is on the road to recovery. I know too well how painful it is to love someone suffering from this disease. Not only are you scared and hurting but you have to deal with the ignorance of others who believe that it's just a diet out of control or that the person just needs to stop.

I have been told that she is just looking for attention and that I should basically make her life hell so that she will decide its not FUN anymore! I have heard -if it were my kid I'd make her eat. I ve been told that I should take her stuff away to punish her for not co-operating and my favorite, the reason that your broke and in this mess is that you chose to coddle her. I wonder if she had cancer if I would be told to ignore and punish her or if I would be told that I am broke because I chose to care for her.

Having a child with a mental illness is very lonely and scary. Its hard to have anyone you love suffering with an ED. So while you send prayers my way please know that I will be praying for you too

(Hugs)

Tina

Oh, I will be praying for you and your sweet daughter. You sound so desperate - my heart is breaking for you and your girl. As the one poster suggested, are there none of the companies there that will help you fight your tax bill or arrange some type of mediation with the government as we have here in the States? They advertise a lot here and if you can't find such a service in Canada, maybe a call to one of the larger offices who fight the IRS in the U.S. can direct you to a service in your country to help with at least that portion of your problem. As for your poor daughter, all I can do is pray and pray for her and that eventually and from out of the blue, maybe she can get a hold and decide to fight this disease for her own life.

I saw a show on "Dr. Phil" just last week about this problem. They mentioned a center on that show that the girl in trouble was going to be admitted to and had one or two previously very ill girls on that show that had gone to that center when they were under 80 pounds and now they have gained weight and look normal again, having regained all or much of their help. Could you maybe find out about that center, contact them and see if they know of a similar situation in Canada who could help your girl? I'll bet if you Google Dr. Phil, anorexia center or link to his web page and contact them, they could tell you who those people are. Apparently getting good and competent help worked wonders for those girls on there who were so very ill and it sounds like your daughter needs urgent help from someone who is the best. Who knows, maybe an email to Dr. Phil's show could result in someone contacting you - maybe it is worth a try. I will be praying for you two and I know that God is big enough and able enough to help you and I pray that it comes very very soon. God bless you both!

Hi Yorkietalkjilly,

Sadly there is only one residential treatment center in canada. It is in B.C and it was started by three mothers who had lost their daughter to an eating disorder. It only has space to treat 8 and only adults. I know that this sounds insane but there are no other centers. There are some private out patient clinics but they are very costly and having spent all of our money ( we even cashed out all of our retirement savings) to treat her so far we simply have nothing left. They only thing we have now is the house and if we sell that we are truly headed for total disaster. We did send our DD to Utah to a place called Avalon Hills. She was there for 5 months. When she came home she was amazingly healthy. She was strong in body mind and soul. However once back in Canada she no longer had any support outside of her family. In the states after a child leaves residential treatment they enter transitional treatment and finally outpatient treatment. With that system of support in place a patient does very well and the outcomes are often wonderful. In my daughters case she came home and all she got was 2 hours a month of medical monitoring. The treatment ended when she came home. She started to struggle and had nowhere to get support. As her mom I am here to listen and comfort and although I never judge and I provide non-stop unconditional love I am not a trained professional. Most mental health professional do not treat someone with an eating disorder because as her doctor at the clinic put it ED's are the cancer of the mental health community. They are VERY difficult to treat. Recovery is very hard to reach and almost impossible without the right support. In the past 5 years I have researched constantly looking for help. I have found resources that the clinic was unaware of. The bottom line sadly is that there is almost nothing here for children or adults with an eating disorder. I could send her back to the states but in order to get her there I would require money and I would also require OHIP (government) approval.

The only way that the government sends a child to the US is if the child will die in a short period of time without help. My DD literally has to be on her death bed in order to be offered proper treatment. Thats why she was sent the first time, we were told that there was nothing more that the hospital could do and that unless the government approved her application for out of country treatment she was going to die.

Our health care system is beyond broken. There is almost no funding for eating disorders. Our government provides 14.6 million dollars per year for the entire province for the treatment of eating disorders. I have been very active in my pursuit of change. I have been in contact with politicians and have been interviewed by the media and have appeared on national tv in an attempt to force our government to see what is happening. I have met many young girls with this illness one young girl was in hospital on a feeding tube as she had been sick for some time... she was nine years old. It is a crisis but as there is a stigma surrounding mental illness many families feel shame or guilt and say nothing. Thats why there is no money because politicians will fund whatever gets them votes.

Sorry now I am ranting. I wish that I could tell you that I hadn't researched my little heart out and that there could be help available for our family but there isnt. There are prayers and love and so long as our country ignores the issue thats about the best we can do. I cling to the hope that she will not get as bad as she was. She is still hanging in there. She has lost a fair amount of weight since leaving Utah but so far not enough to require intervention medically. I have been trying to pay down the insane amount that we owe from our battle to save her as my greatest fear is that is was round one.

Thank you for your prayers. I truly believe in the power of prayer and that God IS taking care of me through all of this.

And thank you so much for all of your advice. You put a great deal of time and effort into your post in an attempt to help, that means so much to me.

Tina (hugs)

You and your daughter are in my prayers and I hope that there is a silver lining in this cloud soon!

I am praying for you and your family. I know it's so hard to see any light but with God there is plenty. I pray your struggle will soon be lifted and your life will be better. He is our Savior and is always with us.

Hi again Tina, sorry to keep butting in from thousands of miles away!! :D

You've probably done this - but wondered if you've had a look on Legal Tree? Apparently they've a list of free legal advice organizations in Ontario?

www.legaltree.ca and just type Ontario into the search box on the right. Hugs and prayers to you both :) Sally x

I will keep you and your family in my prayers also!

Sending our prayers also. I can't imagine the stress you must be dealing with. {Hugs}

I'm sorry that our system has let you, your family and most of all your daughter down! It is certainly not a perfect system, but until you run into the need for services that are NOT available, we often don't realize all the challenges.

I have to believe that you will find the help you need, that someone, somewhere will listen to reason...but then I heard on the news only today of a woman who's been cut off social services because the Gov. believes she is dead...and she can't seem to convince anyone with power that she is NOT!

Eating Disorders are indeed misunderstood, and under-funded, not to mention a life-long battle for those who are fighting. I know 2 women who have fought EDs in their lives, and although "healthy" now, neither would ever suggest they are "cured." I hope your daughter will be able to fight the disease, and find the support she needs to help her in her battle with mental illness.

Tina, My friend went thru the same thing with her daughter, she had heart problems and almost died when she was 16, she is now 20 and back up to a healthy weight plus some. Her too put herself in debt. Her medical hardly covered a thing. Little phych care too. I know from her what you are going thru. The family is back on their feet now and her daughter is doing extremely well. Prayers to you and your daughter. Please remember the LAW of Attraction. Our thoughts control our lives. THINK abundance and health for your daughter and it will come to you. I will pray for you, but it is you that will shape this situation by your possitive thoughts.

I will be calling the government on Monday to try and understand why they decided that I owe them so much. I am praying its a mistake. Once I know the reason then I can decide how to proceed. It has been a real rough road and as I have been diagnosed with severe clinical depression and PTSD its hard to respond to additional stress. I have actually just gotten out of bed since 6pm yesterday! I have to get moving and try to get going or I run the risk of getting stuck (again) Thankfully little furface hasn't left my side... she knows when I am sick or hurting and that helps. Also my DH understands and has been wonderful. So tomorrow I have to make a fresh start. Outside of that I will let the Lord take care of it. Thanks so much for all of your kind words.