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05-05-2011, 12:50 PM | #1 |
Donating Yorkie Yakker | what would you do? I'm having a Mother's Day Brunch here at my home. I've invited the usual members of our families, but have asked that no one bring anything, I will have all of the goodies here.My SIL wrote back that she's bringing something, that THAT'S how she was raised and is not showing up empty handed. I wrote back to please not bring anything it will make the others feel bad-as I have asked people not to bring anything. She wrote back--get this--she's still bringing something; she'll sneak it in! What the heck do I do??? I'd like to not start a fight but how do I put her in her place and still be friendly? |
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05-05-2011, 01:01 PM | #2 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: FtWorth,TX,USA
Posts: 3,269
| I have family members that bring when asked not to and even friends,so I just take a deep breath and dont say anything. You can not control other adults so sometimes you just try smile and hope that noone gets upset. It has worked for me so far. By the way it is really nice of you to want to treat all of the family to a nice brunch,wish someone in my family did that,,,,,besides me. Hope you have a wonderful mothers day. |
05-05-2011, 01:04 PM | #3 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member | I'm the type that always likes to bring our hostess (family or friends) either a small gift or bottle of wine, so I understand your SIL way of thinking. I would probably just accept what ever she brings graciously, saying something like ...."thank you so much, but you know this wasn't necessary as I didn't expect anyone to bring something". Chances are, if others are like members in my family, they will bring something anyway too, so your SIL won't be the only one, just the one to tell you ahead of time. Could be worse....hopefully she won't be like my sister and bring a frozen ham to Christmas dinner (she was "down" for the ham that year).
__________________ ~Ruby, Reno, Razz, & Jack~ |
05-06-2011, 10:26 AM | #4 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 10,534
| Let her bring it.... I was raised the same way. I could not come with nothing in tow either, no matter how much I was told not to. To me it's manners. Maybe you could ask her bring the OJ or champagne for mimosas. She should not have pushed the issue though, if you said don't bring anything and she told you she was going to and you said no again, yet she still feels compelled to, then I would not have told you AGAIN that I was disobeying, I would just bring something simple and nice.
__________________ “Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer.” ― Dean Koontz |
05-06-2011, 10:32 AM | #5 |
♥ Love My Tibbe! ♥ Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: D/FW, Texas
Posts: 22,140
| I would just let her bring something and the others will not feel bad - they are just doing what you asked. You aren't responsible for how they feel anyway. Happy Mother's Day!
__________________ Jeanie and Tibbe One must do the best one can. You may get some marks for a very imperfect answer: you will certainly get none for leaving the question alone. C. S. Lewis |
05-06-2011, 10:44 AM | #6 |
YT 3000 Club Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Long Island, NY USA
Posts: 3,498
| Don't sweat the small stuff. Just don't make a big deal out of it. Accept her offering graciously. You have no control over how the others will feel. I agree she shouldn't have went against your wishes, so don't let it ruin the mood of Mothers Day. Just let it go. Be thankful you have people to share the day with. It really is not a big deal.
__________________ Coco, Pebbles, Trixie, and Wally LOVE MY BABIES!! |
05-06-2011, 10:53 AM | #7 |
I ♥ Armani & Chloe Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 3,895
| I am in the same way- I will not go to someone's house without something- even if I am just stopping in for a chat I will bring dessert or a bottle of wine or something. There are much worse things you could be dealing with- accept what she brings and enjoy your day!
__________________ Armani & Chloe |
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