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02-11-2011, 05:04 PM | #1 |
Ringo (1) and Lucy too! Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: On the Edge of Glory
Posts: 3,447
| I'm getting bad vibes from my new boss So . . . what to do if you are getting the feeling that your new boss does not like you? I'm on my third manager this year. I really, really liked my last boss and the one before him . . I trust and respected though we weren't best friends. She definitely knew what she was doing. But . . my new boss . . . hmmm. I'm just getting an uneasy feeling and don't know how to explain it any better than that. It's only been two weeks but . . still. She doesn't trust me doing work that I've been doing for years. I know I have been pretty well thought of in my field. She and I were managers together a long time ago and got along well. I stepped down about 5 years ago so not sure if she's feeling awkward? Or like I might try to take over? Or maybe it's just my nerves . . the move, my son, now adjusting to yet another new manager's likes and dislikes . . but just thinking about this, I am getting really nervous. Should I just ignore my uneasy feeling for a few weeks and get used to things? Or . . put it out there delicately somehow?
__________________ Mommy to Lucy, Ringo, and Matthew |
Welcome Guest! | |
02-11-2011, 05:10 PM | #2 |
Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: New York
Posts: 3,896
| I would sit tight and give it a few weeks. But always trust your gut feelings. Then if you still feel the same way, you can approach your new boss and see if there are anythings that you can talk to her about. Good luck! |
02-11-2011, 05:21 PM | #3 |
Thor's Human Donating Member | I agree, wait a few weeks to make sure personal stress isn't exacerbating your feelings. I hope things smooth out on their own.
__________________ If you love something, set it free. Unless it's an angry tiger. |
02-11-2011, 06:03 PM | #4 |
Ringo (1) and Lucy too! Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: On the Edge of Glory
Posts: 3,447
| Thanks guys. I appreciate it. I'll step back a bit and just see how things go; whilst being on my best behavior of course!
__________________ Mommy to Lucy, Ringo, and Matthew |
02-11-2011, 06:18 PM | #5 |
Crazy about Kacee! Donating Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Kansas
Posts: 21,173
| Do you get breaks? Perhaps you could have coffee and doughnuts some morning???? Sometimes a friendly outreach to someone goes a long, long way.
__________________ Karen Kacee Muffin 1991-2005 Rest in Peace My Little Angel |
02-11-2011, 06:30 PM | #6 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: South Florida
Posts: 8,008
| Trust your feelings... but don't confront her in a way that could be viewed as hostile. Meaning, trust your feelings but put a good face on, do your work and keep your eyes open. Do you have anyone at work that you could trust to have "your back"?
__________________ Shinja mom to Remy lil Sis to Bailey and Sammy |
02-11-2011, 06:34 PM | #7 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Ft Lauderdale,Fl USA
Posts: 79
| Just do your job to the best of your ability and let things fall where they may, and you will know you did all you could. |
02-11-2011, 06:34 PM | #8 |
YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Washington
Posts: 837
| Since you know her and once worked beside her, maybe stop by her office/section and mention how glad you are she got the job and how the frequent changes of management isn't conducive to a good working environment, yada yada yada .......butter the good side of the bread.
__________________ Kendra |
02-11-2011, 07:23 PM | #9 |
Ringo (1) and Lucy too! Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: On the Edge of Glory
Posts: 3,447
| She's four hours away in WV; I'm a traitor that moved to Ohio; so now she has to drive up one a months and manage four of us in OH - which does kind of suck for her, I'll admit. I showed her around our big office; helped her find her hotel . . . She loves to walk so maybe if she comes up when the weather gets nice I'll take her to a nice trail. I think, too, that she doesn't want anyone to think that she's playing favorites just because we used to work together. So, for a few weeks. . I'll try NOT to complain; try NOT to work at home (though all her WV folks do); and maybe she wants me to keep my distance and not try to be too chummy; yet still try to be welcoming. Lordy, this is exhausting! In my looong career, I've only had one boss that I could not get along with; he took an instant dislike to me despite the fact that my team produced fantastic numbers and he even gave me an Exceeds evaluation! When I finally (after years of stress) asked him why he talked to me the way he did; he told me it was 'for my own good." I knew then that things would never get better for me if I continued to work directly for him. So I stepped down and no longer reported to him. Everyone called me and said they understood why I had to get away from him. My new boss was one of the ones who called me and said she understood what was happening but sometimes he just took a dislike to someone. I felt like all that was behind me. I still see him in meetings and even conference with him from time to time on issues and everything is fine - now that I'm once removed. So, I guess I have a history; I made trouble one time over 5 years ago. So far, no one has held that against me. It's an experience that I have never forgotten and never will. Because I had always gotten promotion after promotion, good reviews . . and all of a sudden, here came someone with the power to derail my entire career - just because. It was so stressful and scary; I needed that job. I finally ended up consulting with an attorney who orchestrated my every move for me - just to help me keep my job. Nothing like that has ever happpened to me before . . but it really affected me. I never, ever want to be in that position again. SO, prob I am a tad paranoid. See? I just went off on a tangent just thinking about it. Sorry!
__________________ Mommy to Lucy, Ringo, and Matthew |
02-11-2011, 07:36 PM | #10 |
Thor's Human Donating Member | I could be wrong, but I doubt that anyone around you cares what happened five years ago, particularly if your boss was known to be difficult. It sticks out in your memory of course, because you were involved. It sounds like you are understandably touchy about being liked, and I hope that is coloring your judgment - because the best way for things to work out would for it to all go away on its own. If it doesn't, you will be able to find ways to handle it. We are here for you. By the way, Skinny Yorkie Mommies misses you!
__________________ If you love something, set it free. Unless it's an angry tiger. |
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