|
Welcome to the YorkieTalk.com Forums Community - the community for Yorkshire Terriers. You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. You will be able to chat with over 35,000 YorkieTalk members, read over 2,000,000 posted discussions, and view more than 15,000 Yorkie photos in the YorkieTalk Photo Gallery after you register. We would love to have you as a member! Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today! If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please click here to contact us. |
|
| LinkBack | Thread Tools |
09-17-2009, 07:11 AM | #1 |
YT Addict Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Posts: 289
| Too funny!!! This is an actual letter from an Austin, Texas woman sent to Proctor and Gamble regarding one of their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph. This was PC Magazine's 2007 Editors' Choice award-winner for the best letter sent via e-mail. Dear Mr. Thatcher, I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants. Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing? As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customer's monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants... Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.' Are you f------ kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness, is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory. For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or 'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong'. Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullsh!t. And that's a promise I will keep. Always. . .. Wendi Aarons Austin , TX |
Welcome Guest! | |
09-17-2009, 07:17 AM | #2 |
Donating YT 10K Club Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Alabama
Posts: 17,674
| Thank you for the first "belly" laugh of the day. |
09-17-2009, 07:24 AM | #3 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Derby, KS
Posts: 204
| That was hilarious!! Thanks for sharing a great laugh already today!
__________________ Rest in Peace Sweet Princess Kelli 5-28-09 and our dear Maxi-Poo 11-25-10 |
09-17-2009, 07:26 AM | #4 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Morristown, TN
Posts: 3,736
| Oh that is just too funny!!!!
__________________ Hello and hugs from Kristie & the furbabies! A world without yorkies is not a very bright one |
09-17-2009, 08:17 AM | #5 |
Owned By Juicy ♥ Donating Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Winter Garden, FL
Posts: 1,843
| This is hilarious!!! Ty for sharing.
__________________ Carlene; Mommy to a beautiful Little Furry Princess, Juicy. |
09-17-2009, 08:31 AM | #6 |
Donating Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Springtown, Texas, USA
Posts: 292
| Oh wow...I don't think I can get off the floor from laughing so hard (I am laying here as I type this, lol). I so needed this laugh this morning...thank you for posting this. My hubby will get a kick out of that letter too.
__________________ Loving my Winston |
09-17-2009, 08:48 AM | #7 |
Crazy Miss Daisy Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Eastern Washington
Posts: 1,904
| HAHAHAHAHA That will keep me laughing all day!
__________________ Yorkie Talkin' with Paula & Daisy! |
Bookmarks |
|
|
| |
|
|
SHOP NOW: Amazon :: eBay :: Buy.com :: Newegg :: PetStore :: Petco :: PetSmart