Walmart Trip -- grrrr.....

[dogbert]

Sadly there are people who make you wonder. While still living in AZ hubby and I took the kids to see the rodeo they had folding chairs by the rail for handicapped people, spaces for carts and wheelchairs, etc. A woman came in a cart assisted by someone working the event. She parked her cart long ways to keep it out of the isle and sat in a chair. She told the man someone would be joining her, he said they couldn't reserve a seat there, he hoped the person came before that area was full. We were only a row or two away and it was early so we could hear the conversation. The seats filled in that area by the time the person showed up and they said she'd have to move her cart if she wanted them to put a chair there. Well, she moved it alright! She got up and jerked the cart several times with her hands just enough to make room for another chair. Those of us watching were shocked, the man next to me said "you can't tell me she needs that chair if she can do that!" I had to agree those things weigh alot! Did anyone see the overweight woman on Tyra Banks that is trying to eat herself into one of those carts? She cried because she's still mobile, she wants to get so heavy she can't walk.

[dogbert]

Almost forgot this. Last week I was at the grocery store and saw a man walking to his car with a cane. He was older but not really old, and the poor guy could only take two or three steps at a time and they were more like little shuffles, not steps. He literally was moving an inch at a time. I thought I'd ask him if he wanted a ride to his car but he was parked close and made it to his car before I had my trunk loaded. I remember thinking he needed a cart but probably was one who refused to use it.

[Wylie's Mom]

Originally Posted by dogbert

Almost forgot this. Last week I was at the grocery store and saw a man walking to his car with a cane. He was older but not really old, and the poor guy could only take two or three steps at a time and they were more like little shuffles, not steps. He literally was moving an inch at a time. I thought I'd ask him if he wanted a ride to his car but he was parked close and made it to his car before I had my trunk loaded. I remember thinking he needed a cart but probably was one who refused to use it.

Ohhh . That just kills me when I see stuff like this at the store. I'm always struggling to strike a balance btwn offering my help...and not being insulting to them (and most people don't seem to get offended when you offer).

Sometimes, I see older women pushing their carts HOME through some of the bordering neighborhoods on the way home from where our grocery store is, and they're like already 1/4 mile from the store , so I offer them a ride. Often times, they don't speak English so it's pretty funny as we try to communicate directions to their house...and we're both sort of laughing at all our hand gestures.

[chattiesmom]

Originally Posted by dogbert

Almost forgot this. Last week I was at the grocery store and saw a man walking to his car with a cane. He was older but not really old, and the poor guy could only take two or three steps at a time and they were more like little shuffles, not steps. He literally was moving an inch at a time. I thought I'd ask him if he wanted a ride to his car but he was parked close and made it to his car before I had my trunk loaded. I remember thinking he needed a cart but probably was one who refused to use it.

It is very difficult to really know what another is going through. I struggle to walk without a limp - because my physical therapists have told me I should. When I do - I pay a price - pain. So others may see me walking slowly, but walking almost normally to my cute little Mini Cooper that now sports a permanent handicap tag. I am sure that a lot of people look at me with disgust and think that I am faking it because I don't use a cane most of the time walk with no limp or only a slight one. What they don't see is the pain that I suffer.

That was so very kind of you to consider asking to help this elder to his vehicle. That's what makes this world a better place - helping others has to start with a kind thought

[Rerun201]

Originally Posted by chattiesmom

Ann, thank you for your insight. I agree with you 100%. It is hard to understand unless you have seen both sides of the issue, and have walked in their shoes. When stores are really crowded, I am AFRAID to walk because I am not very stable..... if I get jostled, then I stumble, if someone bumps my bum leg, I hit the floor.

Ok, I have to add something here. I know there are people who take advantage, and yes, there is a sense of entitlement in the world that is totally frustrating. However, like you, I have been on the other side and would like to remind everyone that sometimes you can't see the disability. I have MS. Somedays you would look and me and never think there was a thing wrong with me. Those are awesome days!! Other days might start out that way, but by an hour or two into it, I may not be able to walk across the room without help. I choose not to use the carts when I shop and am fortunate that I have people I can count on to help me out when I have those times. Three years ago I fell and broke my ankle in 3 places and had no choice but to use a wheelchair then since crutches and MS don't play too nicely together. It was unbelievable to me how many stores are NOT handicap friendly. While I never wrestled with bras (LOVE that image!!) I did manage to get trapped in a bathroom at Ruby Tuesday's and had to wait for DH to realize I had been in there waaay too long. I would only ask that people think about both sides before making a snap judgment. THEN run the woman down when she cusses you out!!

[dogbert]

I guess I am more open to the idea that just because I can't see it doesn't mean it's not there because of our son. He is ADD and has a non verbal learning disorder. The ADD was not diagnosed till after 5th grade and the learning disorder wasn't till his Soph year after they did further testing. By then I had a terrible time getting him the help he needed in school because the teachers had already formed an opinion that he was a "bad" kid. Others couldn't understand that just because he didn't limp, had good speech etc that there was anything wrong. Why did he need an IEP and special ed classes???? Trust me just because you can't see it or hear it doesn't mean it's not there.

[Wylie's Mom]

Originally Posted by dogbert

I guess I am more open to the idea that just because I can't see it doesn't mean it's not there because of our son. He is ADD and has a non verbal learning disorder. The ADD was not diagnosed till after 5th grade and the learning disorder wasn't till his Soph year after they did further testing. By then I had a terrible time getting him the help he needed in school because the teachers had already formed an opinion that he was a "bad" kid. Others couldn't understand that just because he didn't limp, had good speech etc that there was anything wrong. Why did he need an IEP and special ed classes???? Trust me just because you can't see it or hear it doesn't mean it's not there.

Totally agree with this. I hate to sound like a bumper sticker, but really, you can never know what's really going on in someone's life unless you've walked in their shoes. I'm not saying we should all walk around trying to perfect and not using our judgment to try to assess situations....I just think it's important to remember that we can't know a person's struggles by looking at them.

[manolos mom]

Originally Posted by chattiesmom

Debra, I can feel your aggravation at the rude people in the electric shopping carts. I feel much the same about rude shoppers in general. What I have come to realize is that people, in general, are so focused on what they are trying to accomplish that often they don't "see" the people around them. The super-sized lady sounded like a very rude individual that felt like she was "entitled" and you were not.

I was injured in 11/07. A horrific accident that left me semi-crippled, but with very few outward signs of impairment. Because of the injury it is very difficult for me to complete a weeks worth of shopping "on the hoof". When I am able, I walk, but other times I ride. What I have found is that the stores are not really handicap friendly. The isles aren't quite wide enough and the endcaps make it almost impossible to see at the end of an isle. Granted, it is hard for a cart pusher to see as well, but the carts are harder to manipulate.

Personally, I try to be a very polite cart driver/shopper giving way to walking shoppers, but I have found that many cart pushers will hurry up to get in front of me and then stop to look at products and WILL NOT move over or push their carts a bit ahead so I can go around. Kids who are allowed to push carts by their unthinking/uncaring parents are the worst. People make rude remarks when I get up out of the cart to reach an item on the top shelf, rather than offer to help. The store employees are the worst. With their motorized skids of merchandise, they will NOT yeild to shoppers, walking and/or riding.

Since I know both sides of the issue, I go out of my way to try to assist carted shoppers. If I see someone struggling to reach something I ask if I can assist. Sometimes I am rebuffed, but most of the time the driver is very appreciative.

On the ligher side: I will also say that it takes some practice learning to manipulate the carts. When I first started driving one, I was visiting Patty58 in Texas. We were shopping in a Target store, a whole rolling rack of bras got hung up on my cart and I drug them around until they finally came unhooked. It was absolutely hilarious.

OMG, That is so funny!!!

[manolos mom]

Originally Posted by red98vett

haha ! I'm with you there - I just made my first trip to WallyWorld in 2 years only because I have my son living with me and $$ is very tight - I didn't have a bad experience at all but that is only because I was there at the buttcrack of dawn - Anytime after noon... I think all the wally weirdos and their cousins are there....
Debra - I would have been fuming too.....it amazes me how many truly rude people are out there

YEEHAW, I hear the banjos playing. Just kidden.

[manolos mom]

I actually shop at Walmart in West Plano. Get this, they sell Sushi. Chattiesmom, I'm sorry people have given you a hard time. Thats not right..

[chattiesmom]

Originally Posted by manolos mom

I actually shop at Walmart in West Plano. Get this, they sell Sushi. Chattiesmom, I'm sorry people have given you a hard time. Thats not right..

Awww thank you -- For the most part I am able to get around ok. I have learned to deal with my injury. I just shared some of my minor inconveniences because I can only imagine the frustrations for those who are truly incapicated and do their grocery shopping alone. Can you imagine being limited to products on the first two shelves -- shoot, some of the best stuff is hiden on the top shelf

Our Wallyworld doesn't sell Sushi, but Kroger has a Sushi Chef

[RowdysMom]

I've been on both sides of the fence too - I've delt with rude cart riders and now my husband has to ride a cart in large stores like Walmart. He is not allowed to do that much walking due to a severe heart and lung problem. But trust me, he looks perfectly fine - no outward signs of impairment at all. He's only 60 so he doesn't even look old and decrepit! When he needs something off the shelf - he just gets off the cart and gets it. That is not a problem for him and he is allowed to do that much physical exertion. Believe me though, he gets so many disgusted looks from people who probably think he is perfectly fine. Often I walk beside him in the cart and we talk so that people know we are together. I think they are more tolerant because they realize he would be walking with me, if he could.

If he does not use the cart, he has to use oxygen, and that really bothers him because people do stare a lot if you have a hose up your nose! LOL!

When he first started using the cart, he was so tired of people acting like he shouldn't be using it, that he wore his oxygen while in the cart. Then people just looked so pitifully at him - and he did look pretty pitiful - that he doesn't do that anymore!

Anyway, I agree that there are rude people on both sides of the fence and it is difficult to know what to do or how to react.

[MizMaRLeysMoM86]

opps, didnt mean to quote the poster above me

[MizMaRLeysMoM86]

How dare that lady! I am sorry but that is a pet peeve of mine, one that really makes my blood boil, and I know I shouldn't worry about other people but I get so mad. I'm sorry but "morbidly obese"people like the lady you mentioned, NEED TO WALK. Get your butt up and WALK, if there is no medical reason why you are that overweight, then the reason you got to that weight in the first place is because you are LAZY! I am a tad bit over weight myself, about 15 lbs, but you don't see me complaining at JCPenney that they don't have a pair of jeans that fit my fat ass and acting like they owe me something because I AM overweight. I know this sounds shallow and hurtful to some, but its just my opinion. I had an uncle that was just soooo lazy he could barely even walk from one of the house to the other without huffing and puffing because he was morbidly obese, and that just made me sick. There was no reason for his weight gain, just laziness and fast food all the time.

[dogbert]

The lady on Tyra was crying because she wasn't as heavy as she wanted to be. She wants to ride the cart! I can't remember if she was or wanted to be 500 pounds, I'd have to ask our daughter who saw the entire show.
I can't imagine why you would want to be in that state. Sounds like some serious counceling is needed for her. That being said I come from a heavy family, sometimes weight gain is not as easy to control when you have medical issues that cause you to gain treated by drugs that cause you to gain. Especially when you have the family fat gene to start with. I know what it's like to be heavy and treated like crap because of it. So I am careful how I treat heavy people as well. Believe me most heavy people are pretty sad, lonely and depressed before anyone says anything to them or about them that they can hear.