Dog Diary vs. Cat Diary - YorkieTalk.com Forums

Wylie's Mom · 04-09-2008, 10:18 AM

DOG DIARY:

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!

9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!

9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!

10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!

12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!

1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!

3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!

5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!

7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!

8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!

11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

CAT DIARY:

Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed
hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the
rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to
keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of
escape.

In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their
feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly
demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.

Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could
hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was
due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means, and how to
use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try
this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.

The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the
guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My
captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is
safe..... for now...

memphismomma · 04-09-2008, 10:35 AM

LOL ive read this one before it was hilarous then and its hilarous now
thank you i needed a good laugh

silyjillie · 04-09-2008, 10:43 AM

LOL that was great! thanks for sharing, i needed a good laugh!

RebelBelle · 04-09-2008, 10:53 AM

That is so funny! Now I'm off to forward it to my friends. P.S. I never forward. Thanks Ann.

Wylie's Mom · 04-09-2008, 11:25 AM

So glad it caused some laughs - bc I sure need some this week too, there is *something* in the air, isn't there???

celstu1 · 04-09-2008, 12:06 PM

LOL Thats too FUNNY!! I LOVE THAT!

JCarlson2004 · 04-09-2008, 12:14 PM

HAHAHAHA I love it!!

KathyinCali · 04-09-2008, 12:54 PM

LOL...Very funny

cataholic · 04-09-2008, 05:57 PM

OMG that is too funny!!!

SladesMommy · 04-09-2008, 09:53 PM

the dog diary could have been written by my laney girl. so funny!

lilstar63100 · 04-09-2008, 10:09 PM

OMG! the cat part is so my Bubba! the opther morning we ran out of can food so all he had to eat was dry food. boy was he mad. he ran around attacking our feet all day. AND he caught and brought in 3 birds that day!! 2 of them were doves! i swear hes got an evil plan....

04-09-2008, 10:18 AM	#1
Wylie's Mom Furbutts = LOVE Donating Member Moderator Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Phoenix, AZ Posts: 35,889 Blog Entries: 2	Dog Diary vs. Cat Diary DOG DIARY: 8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing! 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing! 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing! 5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing! 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing! 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing! CAT DIARY: Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe..... for now... __________________ ~ A friend told me I was delusional. I nearly fell off my unicorn. ~ °¨¨¨°ºOº°¨¨¨° Ann \| Pfeiffer \| Marcel Verdel Purcell \| Wylie \| Artie °¨¨¨°ºOº°¨¨¨°

04-09-2008, 10:53 AM	#4
RebelBelle Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Madison, MS Posts: 2,597	That is so funny! Now I'm off to forward it to my friends. P.S. I never forward. Thanks Ann. __________________ Misty & Jamie

04-09-2008, 11:25 AM	#5
Wylie's Mom Furbutts = LOVE Donating Member Moderator Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Phoenix, AZ Posts: 35,889 Blog Entries: 2	So glad it caused some laughs - bc I sure need some this week too, there is something in the air, isn't there??? __________________ ~ A friend told me I was delusional. I nearly fell off my unicorn. ~ °¨¨¨°ºOº°¨¨¨° Ann \| Pfeiffer \| Marcel Verdel Purcell \| Wylie \| Artie °¨¨¨°ºOº°¨¨¨°

04-09-2008, 12:06 PM	#6
celstu1 Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 10,534	LOL Thats too FUNNY!! I LOVE THAT! __________________ “Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer.” ― Dean Koontz

04-09-2008, 12:14 PM	#7
JCarlson2004 Mommy To 3 Poochies Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: New York Posts: 8,287	HAHAHAHA I love it!! __________________ Mommy Loves Codie, Tia & Baby Cali RIP My Precious Katie - I Love You

04-09-2008, 10:35 AM	#2
memphismomma BANNED! Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: california Posts: 525	LOL ive read this one before it was hilarous then and its hilarous now thank you i needed a good laugh

04-09-2008, 10:43 AM	#3
silyjillie YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Delray Beach, FL Posts: 1,060	LOL that was great! thanks for sharing, i needed a good laugh!

04-09-2008, 12:54 PM	#8
KathyinCali Love My Li'l Lucy Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Southern California Posts: 6,700	LOL...Very funny __________________ Kathy and Lil' Lucy and Jammies Rest in Peace my Sweet Buster

04-09-2008, 05:57 PM	#9
cataholic Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Va Posts: 1,322	OMG that is too funny!!! __________________ Tina, Momma to Fritzel, Darla, Kasey, Max, Blackie, : http://www.dogster.com/dogs/463494 Member of The Crazy ClubMember of The Little Gentlemen's Club

04-09-2008, 09:53 PM	#10
SladesMommy Donating YT 4000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: ATX Posts: 4,513	the dog diary could have been written by my laney girl. so funny! __________________ GIGANTIC DOG CLOTHES SALE!!! <--- CLlCK!

04-09-2008, 10:09 PM	#11
lilstar63100 Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: California Posts: 865	OMG! the cat part is so my Bubba! the opther morning we ran out of can food so all he had to eat was dry food. boy was he mad. he ran around attacking our feet all day. AND he caught and brought in 3 birds that day!! 2 of them were doves! i swear hes got an evil plan.... __________________ RIP Pebbles. Mommy loves you and misses you!!! Mommy to 3 Yorkshire Terrors Shasta, Sherman and Little Man