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Old 01-11-2008, 12:17 PM   #1
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Wink For all you Grandma's out there

Grandmothers

She was in the bathroom, putting on her makeup, under the watchful
eyes of her young granddaughter as she'd done many times before.
After she applied her lipstick and started to leave, the little one
said, "But Gramma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!"


#####


My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday.
He asked me how old I was, and I told him, "62." He was quiet for
a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"


#####


After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into
old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As
she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her
patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and
stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern
warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say
with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"


#####


A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own
childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a
swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We
rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little
girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, "I sure
wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"


#####


My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you
know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while
I asked, "No, how are we alike?"
"You're both old," he replied.


#####


A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's
word processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it
about?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."


#####


I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I
decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what
color it was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was
fun for me, so I continued. At last she headed for the door,
saying sagely, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some
of these yourself!"


#####


When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept
the lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky
insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them
before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use, Grandpa. The
mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights."


#####


When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm
not sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised. "mine
says I'm four to six."


#####


A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother,
"Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The
grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool.
"That's interesting," she said, "how do you make babies?" "It's
simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."


#####


Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said
a teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder
pregnant." The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't
you know what pregnant means?" she asked. "Sure," said the young
boy confidently. "It means carrying a child."


#####


A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of
kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the
front seat of the truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started
discussing the dog's duties.
"They use him to keep crowds back," said one child.
"No," said another, "he's just for good luck."
A third child brought the argument to a close. "They use the dogs,"
she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrants...
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Old 01-11-2008, 12:42 PM   #2
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OMG..those were SO CUTE! Thanks for that!!
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Old 01-11-2008, 12:48 PM   #3
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Ahh, those were fun! Thanks for sharing!
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Old 01-11-2008, 01:04 PM   #4
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Those were very cute. I'm gonna send that to my mother. She would definitely appreciate that. She loves being a grandma!
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Old 01-11-2008, 01:18 PM   #5
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OMGosh, LOVED all of them..especially the "Who's that"!!!
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Old 01-11-2008, 02:09 PM   #6
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Those are so cute! thanks for sharing!
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Old 01-11-2008, 02:19 PM   #7
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Out of the mouths of babes . Those are soooo cute. Thanks, I needed a little chuckle.
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Old 01-11-2008, 03:08 PM   #8
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Those are so cute!...loved the one about the Grandma with the towel on her head!
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Old 01-11-2008, 03:12 PM   #9
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Love being a grandma and these are really good ones. Something that only kids would think of. I like the aren't you going to kiss the toilet paper one....ha ha that was good for a Friday!
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Old 01-11-2008, 03:18 PM   #10
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I loved the one about the age and told him to look in his underwear,but i do love them all,
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Old 01-11-2008, 03:43 PM   #11
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Lol those were cute thanks for sharing, I love being a grandma
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Old 01-11-2008, 04:48 PM   #12
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So cute....thanks for sharing.
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