If you had one more day with someone you loved

[crystalsmom]

Originally Posted by ryorkies

I wrote in a previous post of losing my father, what I did not mention was that I lost my mother soon after ( a year later on Mother's Day ) and then my husband passed away in January of the following year. I couldn't possibly pick just one person to spend a day with, as it would just break my heart to do so.
I was with my husband when he passed. He had brain cancer and it was a long process, but I was so grateful to have been with him at that very moment of passing and I do believe we spent many moments telling each other all that needed to be said.
I had also been with my father and he too was sick for a very long time, but as mentioned in my previous post ...we were able to speak in what I would like to believe this very way.

My mother passed suddenly and although she had health problems ...noone suspected she was this close.
I think the things I would share with her would be that I now understood why she was not as loving as I would have hoped. My mother was a child of the war and lived in Germany during that time. She met my father while he was fighting the war and he came back for her after. She was frightfully young, only 17 and to top that off ... she had given birth to my oldest sister during
that time. No one suspected what the war had done to her, but my father soon realized after bringing her home
to the states that she was suffering from mental illness. He never once told us this as children, but as we grew older ...we began to realize that something was not right with our mother and she was very different from the mothers of our friends. I harbored resentment towards my mother for many years and thought how differently my life would have turned out if she had been kinder and more understanding. Now I realize how different HER life might have been if it were I who had been more understanding and kinder to her.
I cannot go back and change this, but I would love to have just one more day to express to her how I now understand and realize how difficult her life must have been and how frightened she must have also been. How I now realize that mental illness is just that ... an illness. In my heart I know that everything happens for a reason and that all the puzzle pieces fit together to form that reason, but I would love to pull that one puzzle piece out .... if only for a short loving moment in time.

What a beautiful post and how insightful of you to see this now and understand!!

[crystalsmom]

Originally Posted by my2boyz

I couldn't pick just one. All of my grandparents and step-dad are gone and they each had their special ways that I miss. Daddy and Grandpa would love our house here on the lake, they were both big fishermen...and they have visited in my dreams. I would love it if Grandma could meet my babies, she loved animals...my grandmother on my dad's side was a quilter and I collect antique quilts so there's so much I'd like to talk to her about. I never got to know my Dad's father...he had Parkinson's when we were little so he didn't interact with us much but I'd love to know him. My Dad now has Parkinson's and alzheimers so the time is slowly slipping away with him too.

If I had one more day with any or all of them it would be for a big old fashioned family holiday...I really miss that...Granny P. would enjoy that too, she loved to help at the holidays and I'd like Daddy to be well again so we could visit. But, most of all, I'd like to be able to give each of them the hug I never got to give before they passed and to tell them I love them one more time.

Keep them with you when you have family get togethers talking and remembering what you loved most about them. I know about only picking one since I have lost my mother brother and son but it was my dad who I loved so much I never really said "I love You" to and I would love to have done that. We really knew it without saying it though. Hugs, Joan

[Baby Blessing]

I want to say to each of you, how much your posts have touched my heart, the love that you each have shared. You all are the reason I am so thankful to be a member here at YT.

One day we will hold our loved ones again, in the meantime I know they would want us to take each day and reap all God's many Blessings he brings into our daily lives.

Sending a great big hug to each of you that have posted within this thread.


Patti and Jack

This is so beautiful and as I read all your posts this song came to my mind,

http://susie1114.com/Hetouchedme.html

[crystalsmom]

Originally Posted by Baby Blessing

I want to say to each of you, how much your posts have touched my heart, the love that you each have shared. You all are the reason I am so thankful to be a member here at YT.

One day we will hold our loved ones again, in the meantime I know they would want us to take each day and reap all God's many Blessings he brings into our daily lives.

Sending a great big hug to each of you that have posted within this thread.


Patti and Jack

This is so beautiful and as I read all your posts this song came to my mind,

http://susie1114.com/Hetouchedme.html

Thank you so much Patti and Jack, I was just leaving and noticed this post. I should be home in about four hours or so. Try to watch Oprah everyone.

[ryorkies]

It has been a few years since I have lost my loved ones and I realize how painful it is to post here, yet I have found it cathartic too. I hope those of you who have recently lost someone close .... please feel free to reach out to all of us for support and love. We all joined to find a connection and to share and to me that means not just the good times.

Thank you Joan for beginning this thread and for your continued support and responses.

Thank you Patti and Jack for ..... Just being you! Your kindness and thoughtfulness is so appreciated and how you take the time to comfort everyone is something for which I feel privileged to be included.

Thank you everyone for sharing your very personal stories. I believe it truly binds us closer and helps us all during this very Blessed Season.
Faith, Hope and Love ....

[Shadow]

What Time Does Oprah Come On?

[KELLYLYNN]

If i would have one more day, it would be with my Grandmother, even with not having alot of schooling, she was a very wise woman, and i dearly miss her stories, especially her bible stories, she knew that book from front to back .. and i especially miss her wonderful cooking, she was the best... if i would have one more day, i would tell her how much i love her and miss her.... I love you Gram..

[crystalsmom]

Kelly, your post was a wonderful ending for our thread. Bless You!!

[Suzy]

I would have one more day with my mom, though almost 7 years since she passed, I feel at peace. Here's my story...

I was 17 and at the end of my junior year of high school when the world came crashing down. In a matter of 5 days, she went from being just fine, not knowing she was sick, to having a brain tumor removed, medication, radiation, and chemotherapy. It was just mom and me, and both our worlds were turned upside down. We were best friends-we only always had each other, and we made the greatest team a mom and daughter ever could have. We bonded, grew, and learned so much about each other during the next 6 months. Though it was a really difficult time, it was also when some of the most special memories were made. Our roles reversed somewhat-I did all the driving, running errands, and scheduled people to come and help, and upkeep for the house. My mom stayed home, and cooked, did laundry, and spent time in her gardens. The gardens that year were over the top-she put her heart and soul into making her plants grow...something I didn't understand or appreciate as a teenager, but I understand it now.

She had wanted to live to see me graduate from high school, but in the middle of my senior year of high school, she died. I was a mess. She had died suddenly, actually...most people have this perception that people living with cancer are bed ridden, pale, thin, and are more or less waiting to die. This could not be farther from what my mom was like...She was vibrant, busy, a chatterbox, and running around that hospital like a madwoman She had a minor routine surgery done (not related to the cancer-something else), and was up walking, going to extra physical therapy sessions, trying to regain her strength to come home a day sooner She collapsed while in the hallway, walking and talking the nurse's ear off, and that was it. She had had her first and only seizure, and it was so severe they couldn't do anything to bring her back.

Sometimes, I wonder why the doctors couldn't do more, and I used to get angry about it. But then I think of all the wonderful times and memories we shared, and about my mom's personality. If they would have been able to save her, there's a chance she would have been bedridden, unable to talk or walk, and her quality of life may have been drastically diminished. There is no way that she would have wanted to live like that...she wouldn't have been able to stand being in bed! I think that was God's way of helping her...and in a way-it helped me. I never saw her so sick she couldn't move, and I don't have the memories of sitting by her bedside, wondering how many more days she would have. I have the good memories of her-the fire in her heart that always made her keep going, and the passion to live for each day as it comes-not in the past, and not for the future-you never know what it holds.

As far as "one more day", for me, I can't think too much about that. I didn't get one more day with her, and I've learned to accept that I can't change that. However, I know that the days we had together and the memories made were priceless. During the last few days of her life, there were little things she said and did, almost as if she knew subconsciously that she was going to pass. We had great conversations, and she told me some truly meaningful things that I will hold with me always. I think of those last times with her as the most precious gifts a girl could ever get from her mother. They're moments that were shared between us-and us only. They are times that I think of when I need a smile, a laugh, or a little guidance.

[crystalsmom]

Originally Posted by Suzy

I would have one more day with my mom, though almost 7 years since she passed, I feel at peace. Here's my story...

I was 17 and at the end of my junior year of high school when the world came crashing down. In a matter of 5 days, she went from being just fine, not knowing she was sick, to having a brain tumor removed, medication, radiation, and chemotherapy. It was just mom and me, and both our worlds were turned upside down. We were best friends-we only always had each other, and we made the greatest team a mom and daughter ever could have. We bonded, grew, and learned so much about each other during the next 6 months. Though it was a really difficult time, it was also when some of the most special memories were made. Our roles reversed somewhat-I did all the driving, running errands, and scheduled people to come and help, and upkeep for the house. My mom stayed home, and cooked, did laundry, and spent time in her gardens. The gardens that year were over the top-she put her heart and soul into making her plants grow...something I didn't understand or appreciate as a teenager, but I understand it now.

She had wanted to live to see me graduate from high school, but in the middle of my senior year of high school, she died. I was a mess. She had died suddenly, actually...most people have this perception that people living with cancer are bed ridden, pale, thin, and are more or less waiting to die. This could not be farther from what my mom was like...She was vibrant, busy, a chatterbox, and running around that hospital like a madwoman She had a minor routine surgery done (not related to the cancer-something else), and was up walking, going to extra physical therapy sessions, trying to regain her strength to come home a day sooner She collapsed while in the hallway, walking and talking the nurse's ear off, and that was it. She had had her first and only seizure, and it was so severe they couldn't do anything to bring her back.

Sometimes, I wonder why the doctors couldn't do more, and I used to get angry about it. But then I think of all the wonderful times and memories we shared, and about my mom's personality. If they would have been able to save her, there's a chance she would have been bedridden, unable to talk or walk, and her quality of life may have been drastically diminished. There is no way that she would have wanted to live like that...she wouldn't have been able to stand being in bed! I think that was God's way of helping her...and in a way-it helped me. I never saw her so sick she couldn't move, and I don't have the memories of sitting by her bedside, wondering how many more days she would have. I have the good memories of her-the fire in her heart that always made her keep going, and the passion to live for each day as it comes-not in the past, and not for the future-you never know what it holds.

As far as "one more day", for me, I can't think too much about that. I didn't get one more day with her, and I've learned to accept that I can't change that. However, I know that the days we had together and the memories made were priceless. During the last few days of her life, there were little things she said and did, almost as if she knew subconsciously that she was going to pass. We had great conversations, and she told me some truly meaningful things that I will hold with me always. I think of those last times with her as the most precious gifts a girl could ever get from her mother. They're moments that were shared between us-and us only. They are times that I think of when I need a smile, a laugh, or a little guidance.

Suzy what a beautiful tribute to your Mother. I didn't need one more day with my Mom either. She was much like your Mom full of energy fighting her cancer. I moved her from Chicago to live with us. The Cleveland Clinic gave her 3 mos and she lived almost three wonderful years. Two months before she died she wanted to go out for St. Patrick's Day so I called the Dr and he said it might be better medicine than he could give her and it was. I told her many times how I felt and I can see you had much the same relationship.

[mustangbee]

If you had one more day with someone you loved,who would it be and why. What would you do on that day and what would you whisper in their ear.


That's some really hard questions Joan. Funny thing is I would want to spend one day with someone who I have never met. Mom, Dad,all Grandparents and my In-Laws have all left us. I'm sure we will meet again when the time is right. We will all live in Gods home together.
The person who I would love to have a special day with would be my children's birth Mom. She was hit by a car and passed away three days later, never knowing what hit her. She left behind three wonderful children. She would be so proud of them. I know in my heart she is watching over us. But I really would love to have a chance to meet her. We were lucky they came to our town, and became students at the school where I was working. My husband and our two sons were Blessed the day we found out we could adopt them and make them part of our family.That was over nine years ago. We have her picture hanging in our family room because we have made her part of us too.
I would just love a day to talk with her. As far as what I would whisper in her ear? I really have no idea, but if I had to guess, hmmmmm, I really don't know. I couldn't really say thank you now could I, after all it's because she's gone I have the love of her birth children. I guess it would be we love you now and always.

[Bonnie's Mom]

Originally Posted by Suzy

I would have one more day with my mom, though almost 7 years since she passed, I feel at peace. Here's my story...

I was 17 and at the end of my junior year of high school when the world came crashing down. In a matter of 5 days, she went from being just fine, not knowing she was sick, to having a brain tumor removed, medication, radiation, and chemotherapy. It was just mom and me, and both our worlds were turned upside down. We were best friends-we only always had each other, and we made the greatest team a mom and daughter ever could have. We bonded, grew, and learned so much about each other during the next 6 months. Though it was a really difficult time, it was also when some of the most special memories were made. Our roles reversed somewhat-I did all the driving, running errands, and scheduled people to come and help, and upkeep for the house. My mom stayed home, and cooked, did laundry, and spent time in her gardens. The gardens that year were over the top-she put her heart and soul into making her plants grow...something I didn't understand or appreciate as a teenager, but I understand it now.

She had wanted to live to see me graduate from high school, but in the middle of my senior year of high school, she died. I was a mess. She had died suddenly, actually...most people have this perception that people living with cancer are bed ridden, pale, thin, and are more or less waiting to die. This could not be farther from what my mom was like...She was vibrant, busy, a chatterbox, and running around that hospital like a madwoman She had a minor routine surgery done (not related to the cancer-something else), and was up walking, going to extra physical therapy sessions, trying to regain her strength to come home a day sooner She collapsed while in the hallway, walking and talking the nurse's ear off, and that was it. She had had her first and only seizure, and it was so severe they couldn't do anything to bring her back.

Sometimes, I wonder why the doctors couldn't do more, and I used to get angry about it. But then I think of all the wonderful times and memories we shared, and about my mom's personality. If they would have been able to save her, there's a chance she would have been bedridden, unable to talk or walk, and her quality of life may have been drastically diminished. There is no way that she would have wanted to live like that...she wouldn't have been able to stand being in bed! I think that was God's way of helping her...and in a way-it helped me. I never saw her so sick she couldn't move, and I don't have the memories of sitting by her bedside, wondering how many more days she would have. I have the good memories of her-the fire in her heart that always made her keep going, and the passion to live for each day as it comes-not in the past, and not for the future-you never know what it holds.

As far as "one more day", for me, I can't think too much about that. I didn't get one more day with her, and I've learned to accept that I can't change that. However, I know that the days we had together and the memories made were priceless. During the last few days of her life, there were little things she said and did, almost as if she knew subconsciously that she was going to pass. We had great conversations, and she told me some truly meaningful things that I will hold with me always. I think of those last times with her as the most precious gifts a girl could ever get from her mother. They're moments that were shared between us-and us only. They are times that I think of when I need a smile, a laugh, or a little guidance.

WOW...what a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing that!