My beautiful Jerzee Lina
 

I know I haven't been on here in a while, but I needed to come here for support. I lost my beautiful baby girl yesterday. She was such a wonderful puppy and not a second goes by that I don't want her back. I think she knows how much I loved her and will continue to love her, though. I'm carrying so much guilt for the way things could have been and I'm wondering if I was part of the reason she isn't with me today. I took my sweet little 6-month old baby into the vet's office on Wednesday afternoon and kissed her goodbye for the last time as I handed her over to strangers. She had an appointment for Thursday morning to get spayed and they asked that I bring her in the night before so they could run tests and make sure everything was alright before proceeding with surgery. She made it through the surgery just fine, my strong little baby. But soon after she started regaining consciousness, her little heart stopped. I guess it was her time to go, but I wasn't ready to let her. They tried for 20 minutes to resuscitate her, but no luck. I was so excited for my little girl to be coming home today. I would have been picking her up in an hour and a half and staying home from work to be with her. I received the phone call yesterday shortly after I got to work. The vet started by saying the operation went well. This lifted my spirits since I had a bad feeling about taking her in. He then went on to say that there had been complications, but she was still hooked up to the monitors. My first thought was that something was wrong, but I still had hope my strong little baby would pull through. It was then he told me she didn't make it and I broke down. I have had so many feelings running through me: anger, guilt, sadness. There are so many things I wish I could have done with her before she was taken from me, but I guess everyone feels that way. I'll never be able to fully recover from the pain I feel. A couple of people I work with said that I should look for a new puppy to ease the pain, but I think that would be disrespecting my baby girl. I don't want anything to take away from her precious life. I just need some support because I feel as if my heart has been ripped from my chest. I'm not able to eat, to sleep. I haven't even been able to go home since. Everything reminds me of her and I feel as if I'm all alone in feeling this way, even though I have a very supportive family. My fiance is taking this pretty hard as well because he loved that little dog so much. She touched so many hearts in such a short time. I just wish there was something to ease the pain, but I think I'll have to wait it out. I keep remembering the song by Tim McGraw and thinking of my own little girl who I'll miss so much.

Gotta hold on easy as I let you go.
Gonna tell you how much I love you,
though you think you already know.
I remember I thought you looked like an angel wrapped in pink so soft and warm.
You've had me wrapped around your finger since the day you were born.

A beautiful baby from the outside in.
Chase your dreams but always know the road that'll lead you home again.
Go on, take on this whole world.
But to me you know you'll always be, my little girl.

When you were in trouble that crooked little smile could melt my heart of stone.
Now look at you, I've turned around and you've almost grown.
Sometimes you're asleep I whisper "I Love You!" in the moonlight at your door.
As I walk away, I hear you say, "Daddy Love You More!".

I love you Reeny Bean. I always will. . .

omg I'm so so sorry hun.

This is so sad, I wish I could say something to take the pain away, but only time can heal.

Please except my deepest sympathy.

RIP sweet baby.

I am so sorry for your loss. You are in my prayers as you try to get through this difficult time.

I'm sorry to hear about your terrible loss. May God bless you, and heal your heart.

Oh! I'm sooooo sorry for your loss! Hugs and prayers to you during this rough time!

Oh nooooooo - that's just awful and I'm so so sorry....I can't imagine how sad you are and this shouldn't have happened. :( :( :( :(

iIm feeling your pain, im so so sorry



Donna

I agree, that shouldn't have happened. I'm so sorry for your loss. Maybe right now is not the best time to get another. Might want to wait a little bit, till the deep pain lets up. But do consider getting another in the future.

Again, I'm so sorry for your loss.

omg!!! im hysterical,,, i cant read these anymore. im so sorry

Oh I am so sorry for your loss as well. That is way to sad that is why I just can't spade my little girl DIVA. I hope the pain and sorrow you are feeling gets better and that her memories make it easier.

I am very new on this board, but my heart broke when I read this. I am sitting here in tears as I write this. I am SO SO SO sorry this happened. It will take time to heal your wounds and your heart will always remember, but do consider getting another before too long. It is amazing how it can help you to heal. I KNOW! I have been there.
Hugs
Sonya

I am so very sorry for your loss. Praying for you right now.

I am so sorry for your tragic loss.

I couldn't post after I first read this. :( I had to come back to tell you how sorry I am for your too tragic loss. God bless you and may time quickly heal your sorrow. Thoughts and prayers are with you.

I am so very sorry for your loss

Here are a couple of pictures of my Jerzee Lina. She was such a beautiful little girl. . .

I'm so sorry. My heart aches for you. Do you know what kind of anesthesia they used? If it was a barbituate? Your little girl was beautiful.

Oh, I am soooo very sorry for your loss. As I sit here writing, and looking at your beautiful Jerzee, I can only imagine the pain you feel, as I am shedding tears, as most of us do when we come to this section. Please please come here when you need to talk, to vent, to talk about your baby. We all say this, that in time it does get easier, but it never makes the pain go away. It just lessons as time passes. She is in Gods' hands now, in that you can take solace.
I, we, all understand the love, the pure innocence of these little creatures, and the massive hold they take upon our hearts. May your sweet Jerzee R I P and run with the other furbabies at the Rainbow Bridge. It is NOT your fault. Please take some comfort in knowing that she knows you LOVE her.

Bless your heart I am so sorry. I know how your heart is breaking and I understand how you feel about getting another baby right now. When I lost my Kinzee that is just how I felt but after about 6 months my heart healed enough and now I have my Murfee. It takes time though. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. patty

I am so sorry! I can't imagine the pain you must be going through...
Sending you hugs and healing.

oh no I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful baby.

My heart goes out to you.

I am so sorry for your loss, your girl is so beautiful, I hate this for you and can't imagine the hurt your going through, i will keep you in my prayers.

I am so very sorry for your loss.:(

Oh, I am so sorry about Jerzee Lina. How shocking for you and to hear over the phone must have been agonizing. Sending warm thoughts. -Deborah

My sympathy
 

I am so sorry for your loss. My heart is just breaking reading your post about your little one. My thoughts and prayers are with you.


j:)

I am so sorry to hear about your terrible loss . You are in my thoughts and prayers .

I'm so sorry your precious little Jerzee had to leave you so soon. She was a beautiful little girl. When that hole in your heart seems like it is going to consume you, grab onto all those wonderful memories you have of Jerzee and use them to give you strength. Her tiny little spirit will always be watching over you and in time, you will be able to smile when you think of her. God Bless.

I am so sorry for your loss. My sister went through similiar situtation with her miniature pincher. However, she went in to got her ears clipped and did not wake up.