Help Needed. Abbie's jealous of new pup! - YorkieTalk.com Forums

dalnna · 10-28-2006, 04:19 AM

Good morning everyone. Well, sort of. Boy am I exhausted! We got a new pup yesterday! She's the most darling little thing. She's six months old and clinging to me like glue! The breeder was going to keep her but because of a "white foot" which isn't white at all but just a tad lighter, can't breed her so she sold her to me. Anyway, my problem is Abbie, my little girl. She will be 2 next month and has been the only dog in the house except for when the grandpuppies, a doxie and a chihuahua come over. She has always loved to see them and loved to play with them but this new baby has upset her terribly. She won't even sit with me or come when I call her. She's totally ignoring me and is very snappy with the baby. I've never seen her like this before. Could it be that this is a girl and the grandpuppies are boys? I don't know what to do. I don't want her to feel neglected but she doesn't want anything to do with me right now. I know her feelings are hurt. I don't want to assign human feelings to a dog but it really seems that way to me. Any help would be appreciated!

JESSY_RN2B · 10-28-2006, 07:59 AM

I know how you feel. My toy poodle was so jealous of the new pup, I was worried. Give it time.........it will more than likely change. My poodle adores him now and is very protective of him.

Good luck

dalnna · 10-28-2006, 08:43 AM

Thanks for the words of encouragement. I would hate to think her personality would change, she has always been so sweet and gentle. She used to give kisses all the time and has refused since the pup arrived. I brought the pup in the house myself. I'm beginning to wish I had let someone else bring it here. Maybe that would have made a difference since she enjoys it so much when other pups visit.

Grayson's mom · 10-28-2006, 09:42 AM

Be patient my cats took about 2 weeks before they came around, they still don't like the thoughts of Grayson around but they are dealing with it! It seems my cats fight more with each other now than they ever have, I know they are just acting out for attention, and attention we are giving them!

Good luck, It will get better just give your doggie time

Olivier · 10-28-2006, 10:14 AM

Patience , patience and patience , The little one need time to adjust to the new situation .

Toby'sMama · 10-28-2006, 10:19 AM

As others have said... just give it some time! I also brought a new puppy into the house this summer... Toby is 5 years old, and has been my only baby. Miss Lola arrived, and he was extremely angry with me... had his nose out of joint big time! It took about 2 to 3 weeks before he would consider playing with her! Now they play all the time! Sometimes have little fights -- but on the whole -- he does love her. When she gets out of the bath, or back from the vet, groomer, etc., he has to go sniff her to make sure she's okay, and he will give her kisses! I make sure to give him special one-on-one time, though -- and he gets the first treat, and the first loves when I get home...

Keep us updated, but I'm sure -- with patience -- you'll be sharing their cute little play stories with us!

Donna Jean · 10-28-2006, 10:38 AM

They will be the best of friends before you know it. I know this may sound crazy, and I am a little crazy, however I always talk to my pets, and I would tell your older pet that this is her little girl, and you got her for her, and it is her baby to take care of. Hold them both at the same time, and when your older dog is not on your lap, or the puppy, ask the older dog, where is your baby, go find your baby, when she does pick them both of and tell her what a good girl she is and how much you love her, and how proud of her you are about the way she is taking care of her new baby!!!!! Trust me, let her think you got the puppy for her, not you, and she will come around before you know it. She needs a little extra love right now, and always give it to her, always pick her up first, than the puppy so she knows you think she is just wonderful, and that she is in charge of the new puppy, and needs to teach it to be housebroken, how to play etc. Doggies love to have a play mate, everything will work out fine, and I can't tell you how happy i am that you have two little babies now! I am a breeder, and I only sell my puppies in pairs, everyone who gets my puppies are so happy they have littermates, as they are already bonded, and the pressure is off you when you are unable to take your baby with you. Everyone always gets another Yorkie, you just can't have one, and i have always had at leat a 6 pac, they all love each other and if I take one and not the rest, they get really worried about the one i took and can't wait to give her a wonderful greeting, like I'm sooooooo glad your back, we missed you!

Let us know how you are doing and pictures would be great!

Bnot · 10-28-2006, 12:52 PM

When I brougth Venus home, I tried to give Adonis a LOT of special attention. Treats, love, time alone with me without Venus around.

It did work, seems he loves her, and she him now! I know now, was the best thing I ever did for him, was get him a playmate. Its amazing how well they play together now. I've only had her since late August, about 2 months.

I had Adonis 5 years, before I got Venus.

This did take some time and patience that first 3 weeks. And a lot of "treats" for him, that she couldn't have yet. Special time with him, for brushing and grooming, while Venus wasn't in the same room.

I let Adonis have special priviledges that Venus didn't have, like roaming the entire house, since Venus wasn't house trained.

It was really hard to divide my attention up that first week, without makeing him feel neglected. I wanted her to know she was loved and accepted here, but I didn't want him to be jealous.

Try to set out about 30 minutes to an hour each day with the older dog. Its your special time together.

This will happen, they will get to love and play with eachother. I watched my 2 for 3 hours play last night. I was so afraid too, that first week or 2, that it would never happen.

AprilLove · 10-28-2006, 01:07 PM

Have patience as others have said. It can take some time, When I brought AprilLove home, my Maltese did not warm up to her. In fact I posted similar concerns here just like you. I thought Bitsy (Maltese) was never going to come around, but she had been my baby and queen of the house for 10 years up to that point. I devoted extra time to Bitsy and always monitered her and April when they were together. Now it seems like a distant memory. They get along like sisters now (Bitsy tolerates April at times but now they play together, sleep together and always wonder where the other one is.) Have faith that she will come around, and respect her lack of attention to you right now give her time and keep loving on her! Here is AprilLove and Bitsy now and believe you me, I had my doubts too, that this would ever happen!!! lol

Patti · 10-28-2006, 07:00 PM

Like everyone said give it time. When I got Cali last year. Maya my 9 year old crabby pom was not happy at all. It looks months for her to warm up to er but now they lay together all the time.

TootiesMom · 10-28-2006, 08:55 PM

yep, a thread where everyone agrees!
my Tinker was VERY unhappy when i brought Hope home... she never snapped at her but she let me know she was unhappy. I made a special effort to give Tinker her "own" time without the puppy and reminded her everyday that she was the queen of the house.... and she had to show Hope how to be the "princess"... I talk to mine alot too and my reassurances to Tinker have really helped....
d

sweetr72 · 10-28-2006, 10:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dalnna

Good morning everyone. Well, sort of. Boy am I exhausted! We got a new pup yesterday! She's the most darling little thing. She's six months old and clinging to me like glue! The breeder was going to keep her but because of a "white foot" which isn't white at all but just a tad lighter, can't breed her so she sold her to me. Anyway, my problem is Abbie, my little girl. She will be 2 next month and has been the only dog in the house except for when the grandpuppies, a doxie and a chihuahua come over. She has always loved to see them and loved to play with them but this new baby has upset her terribly. She won't even sit with me or come when I call her. She's totally ignoring me and is very snappy with the baby. I've never seen her like this before. Could it be that this is a girl and the grandpuppies are boys? I don't know what to do. I don't want her to feel neglected but she doesn't want anything to do with me right now. I know her feelings are hurt. I don't want to assign human feelings to a dog but it really seems that way to me. Any help would be appreciated!

I am so glad you brought this up. We brought Holly who is 4 into our home of three dogs two days ago...and she isnt adjusting one bit. She has never been around another dog before and is TERRIFIED of mine and snaps at them all the time. She hides under beds, in the bathroom, closets...

Im so sad for her, I see her fear...and I PRAY that she will warm up them soon or at all!! I feel a little better reading what people are posting and I hope all goes well for both of us soon!!

Dawn

dalnna · 10-30-2006, 05:24 AM

To Everyone who responded....a HUGE THANK YOU! Here's an update. The new pup, I think we've settled on calling her Lucy, has been here 2 full days and an evening. Abbie still won't have anything to do with her, and won't come around me if Lucy is nearby, but has begun to approach me if the little one is behind the kitchen gate. Otherwise, she'll allow me to play with her as long as I want, but the minute I want to stop playing and just get a little smoochy time, she's off. Nope! Not yet! She won't let the pup near her toys and goes and grabs them away from her if she happens to get one. I bought Lucy her own toy yesterday and Abbie grabbed that one too! I've put Lucy in Abbie's crate at might and am letting her sleep with me for right now. (Hubby's out of town) Abbie has a 36" crate (I don't know WHAT I was thinking!) so I think I'm just going to divide it so they can both use it. Bedrooms not big enough for another one.

The new pup is a little doll! She loves to just lay on top of me. Much to hubby's dismay, she hasn't even begun the potty training process. Hates to be groomed but she'll have to get used to that quick. We bathe pretty frequently around here! I tried to post some photos, but it said it was too big even after going through the resizer so I'll have to play around with that. Again, thanks for all the hope! I'm hanging in there!

dalnna · 10-30-2006, 05:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dalnna

To Everyone who responded....a HUGE THANK YOU! Here's an update. The new pup, I think we've settled on calling her Lucy, has been here 2 full days and an evening. Abbie still won't have anything to do with her, and won't come around me if Lucy is nearby, but has begun to approach me if the little one is behind the kitchen gate. Otherwise, she'll allow me to play with her as long as I want, but the minute I want to stop playing and just get a little smoochy time, she's off. Nope! Not yet! She won't let the pup near her toys and goes and grabs them away from her if she happens to get one. I bought Lucy her own toy yesterday and Abbie grabbed that one too! I've put Lucy in Abbie's crate at might and am letting her sleep with me for right now. (Hubby's out of town) Abbie has a 36" crate (I don't know WHAT I was thinking!) so I think I'm just going to divide it so they can both use it. Bedrooms not big enough for another one.

The new pup is a little doll! She loves to just lay on top of me. Much to hubby's dismay, she hasn't even begun the potty training process. Hates to be groomed but she'll have to get used to that quick. We bathe pretty frequently around here! I tried to post some photos, but it said it was too big even after going through the resizer so I'll have to play around with that. Again, thanks for all the hope! I'm hanging in there!

Okay, managed to get a photo! at first was dismayed that her bow was in upside down. Now I realize it fits her personality to a "T". What a little clown!

Cherry · 10-30-2006, 05:52 AM

So happy to see this post but very sorry to hear about your situation. I also am planning on getting another pup after the holidays. But when anyone comes here with a dog so that Diezel can have a play date he will entertain the the dog for maybe 10 minutes an then does not want anything to do with them. I have had friends come over with dogs from the first day Diezel came home because I wanted him to be socialized but he just seems to care more about people then other dogs. He doesnt really avoid me and there was only 1 situation where he tried hiding in the bedroom when I had a lil furbaby guest for 1 weekend but I put the other puppy in the bedroom so I had some alone time with Diezel and then he seemed to be fine after that. But my biggest fear is also that it will changed Diezels personality long term. Diezel is so friendly and affectionate with me and anyone else who comes here I dont want bringing another puppy in the house to change the way he loves me or anyone else.

I wish you the best of luck with your new addition to your family

I am sure I will be posting a similar post to this one in the future!

10-28-2006, 04:19 AM	#1
dalnna Donating Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 316	Help Needed. Abbie's jealous of new pup! Good morning everyone. Well, sort of. Boy am I exhausted! We got a new pup yesterday! She's the most darling little thing. She's six months old and clinging to me like glue! The breeder was going to keep her but because of a "white foot" which isn't white at all but just a tad lighter, can't breed her so she sold her to me. Anyway, my problem is Abbie, my little girl. She will be 2 next month and has been the only dog in the house except for when the grandpuppies, a doxie and a chihuahua come over. She has always loved to see them and loved to play with them but this new baby has upset her terribly. She won't even sit with me or come when I call her. She's totally ignoring me and is very snappy with the baby. I've never seen her like this before. Could it be that this is a girl and the grandpuppies are boys? I don't know what to do. I don't want her to feel neglected but she doesn't want anything to do with me right now. I know her feelings are hurt. I don't want to assign human feelings to a dog but it really seems that way to me. Any help would be appreciated!

10-28-2006, 07:59 AM	#2
JESSY_RN2B Owned by 3 furballs Donating Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Texas Posts: 6,581	I know how you feel. My toy poodle was so jealous of the new pup, I was worried. Give it time.........it will more than likely change. My poodle adores him now and is very protective of him. Good luck __________________ Bobbi Yorkietalk http://www.dogster.com/dogs/395435 And now........little Aja too! http://www.picturetrail.com/sfx/album/view/23776545

10-28-2006, 09:42 AM	#4
Grayson's mom Mommy's Little Boo Boo Donating Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Virgina Posts: 3,734	Be patient my cats took about 2 weeks before they came around, they still don't like the thoughts of Grayson around but they are dealing with it! It seems my cats fight more with each other now than they ever have, I know they are just acting out for attention, and attention we are giving them! Good luck, It will get better just give your doggie time __________________ Proud mom to Grayson Abby Dusty Pepper Ryan Gabriel and of course me Diane Grayson loves Tia

10-28-2006, 10:38 AM	#7
Donna Jean YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Colorado Posts: 616	Not to worry! They will be the best of friends before you know it. I know this may sound crazy, and I am a little crazy, however I always talk to my pets, and I would tell your older pet that this is her little girl, and you got her for her, and it is her baby to take care of. Hold them both at the same time, and when your older dog is not on your lap, or the puppy, ask the older dog, where is your baby, go find your baby, when she does pick them both of and tell her what a good girl she is and how much you love her, and how proud of her you are about the way she is taking care of her new baby!!!!! Trust me, let her think you got the puppy for her, not you, and she will come around before you know it. She needs a little extra love right now, and always give it to her, always pick her up first, than the puppy so she knows you think she is just wonderful, and that she is in charge of the new puppy, and needs to teach it to be housebroken, how to play etc. Doggies love to have a play mate, everything will work out fine, and I can't tell you how happy i am that you have two little babies now! I am a breeder, and I only sell my puppies in pairs, everyone who gets my puppies are so happy they have littermates, as they are already bonded, and the pressure is off you when you are unable to take your baby with you. Everyone always gets another Yorkie, you just can't have one, and i have always had at leat a 6 pac, they all love each other and if I take one and not the rest, they get really worried about the one i took and can't wait to give her a wonderful greeting, like I'm sooooooo glad your back, we missed you! Let us know how you are doing and pictures would be great!

10-28-2006, 01:07 PM	#9
AprilLove My Three Hearts Donating Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Wrapped around their paws :-) Posts: 7,190	Have patience as others have said. It can take some time, When I brought AprilLove home, my Maltese did not warm up to her. In fact I posted similar concerns here just like you. I thought Bitsy (Maltese) was never going to come around, but she had been my baby and queen of the house for 10 years up to that point. I devoted extra time to Bitsy and always monitered her and April when they were together. Now it seems like a distant memory. They get along like sisters now (Bitsy tolerates April at times but now they play together, sleep together and always wonder where the other one is.) Have faith that she will come around, and respect her lack of attention to you right now give her time and keep loving on her! Here is AprilLove and Bitsy now and believe you me, I had my doubts too, that this would ever happen!!! lol Attached Thumbnails __________________ MaryKay AprilLove Wubs Moosie R.I.P. Bailey & BitsyRoo

10-28-2006, 08:43 AM	#3
dalnna Donating Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 316	Thanks for the words of encouragement. I would hate to think her personality would change, she has always been so sweet and gentle. She used to give kisses all the time and has refused since the pup arrived. I brought the pup in the house myself. I'm beginning to wish I had let someone else bring it here. Maybe that would have made a difference since she enjoys it so much when other pups visit.

10-28-2006, 10:14 AM	#5
Olivier Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Canada Posts: 2,999	Patience , patience and patience , The little one need time to adjust to the new situation .

10-28-2006, 10:19 AM	#6
Toby'sMama Donating YT Addict Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: California Posts: 329	As others have said... just give it some time! I also brought a new puppy into the house this summer... Toby is 5 years old, and has been my only baby. Miss Lola arrived, and he was extremely angry with me... had his nose out of joint big time! It took about 2 to 3 weeks before he would consider playing with her! Now they play all the time! Sometimes have little fights -- but on the whole -- he does love her. When she gets out of the bath, or back from the vet, groomer, etc., he has to go sniff her to make sure she's okay, and he will give her kisses! I make sure to give him special one-on-one time, though -- and he gets the first treat, and the first loves when I get home... Keep us updated, but I'm sure -- with patience -- you'll be sharing their cute little play stories with us!

10-28-2006, 12:52 PM	#8
Bnot YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Mobile AL Posts: 1,399	When I brougth Venus home, I tried to give Adonis a LOT of special attention. Treats, love, time alone with me without Venus around. It did work, seems he loves her, and she him now! I know now, was the best thing I ever did for him, was get him a playmate. Its amazing how well they play together now. I've only had her since late August, about 2 months. I had Adonis 5 years, before I got Venus. This did take some time and patience that first 3 weeks. And a lot of "treats" for him, that she couldn't have yet. Special time with him, for brushing and grooming, while Venus wasn't in the same room. I let Adonis have special priviledges that Venus didn't have, like roaming the entire house, since Venus wasn't house trained. It was really hard to divide my attention up that first week, without makeing him feel neglected. I wanted her to know she was loved and accepted here, but I didn't want him to be jealous. Try to set out about 30 minutes to an hour each day with the older dog. Its your special time together. This will happen, they will get to love and play with eachother. I watched my 2 for 3 hours play last night. I was so afraid too, that first week or 2, that it would never happen.

10-28-2006, 07:00 PM	#10
Patti Donating YT 30K Club Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Illinois Posts: 35,509 Blog Entries: 6	Like everyone said give it time. When I got Cali last year. Maya my 9 year old crabby pom was not happy at all. It looks months for her to warm up to er but now they lay together all the time. __________________ Cali Pixie Roxie : RIP Nikki; RIP Maya;RIP my sweet Dixie girl 1/17/08 http://callipuppyscastle.bravehost.com/index.html

10-28-2006, 08:55 PM	#11
TootiesMom and Hopeys Mom Too Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Louisiana Posts: 4,109	yep, a thread where everyone agrees! my Tinker was VERY unhappy when i brought Hope home... she never snapped at her but she let me know she was unhappy. I made a special effort to give Tinker her "own" time without the puppy and reminded her everyday that she was the queen of the house.... and she had to show Hope how to be the "princess"... I talk to mine alot too and my reassurances to Tinker have really helped.... d __________________ Donna's little herd.... Tooties Dogster http://www.dogster.com/?271687 Hopeys Dogster http://www.dogster.com/?448723 and Tinker, TBone(RIP) Laci .. OH, and Me-Kitty(RIP)

10-30-2006, 05:24 AM	#13
dalnna Donating Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 316	To Everyone who responded....a HUGE THANK YOU! Here's an update. The new pup, I think we've settled on calling her Lucy, has been here 2 full days and an evening. Abbie still won't have anything to do with her, and won't come around me if Lucy is nearby, but has begun to approach me if the little one is behind the kitchen gate. Otherwise, she'll allow me to play with her as long as I want, but the minute I want to stop playing and just get a little smoochy time, she's off. Nope! Not yet! She won't let the pup near her toys and goes and grabs them away from her if she happens to get one. I bought Lucy her own toy yesterday and Abbie grabbed that one too! I've put Lucy in Abbie's crate at might and am letting her sleep with me for right now. (Hubby's out of town) Abbie has a 36" crate (I don't know WHAT I was thinking!) so I think I'm just going to divide it so they can both use it. Bedrooms not big enough for another one. The new pup is a little doll! She loves to just lay on top of me. Much to hubby's dismay, she hasn't even begun the potty training process. Hates to be groomed but she'll have to get used to that quick. We bathe pretty frequently around here! I tried to post some photos, but it said it was too big even after going through the resizer so I'll have to play around with that. Again, thanks for all the hope! I'm hanging in there!

10-30-2006, 05:52 AM	#15
Cherry YT Addict Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 268	So happy to see this post but very sorry to hear about your situation. I also am planning on getting another pup after the holidays. But when anyone comes here with a dog so that Diezel can have a play date he will entertain the the dog for maybe 10 minutes an then does not want anything to do with them. I have had friends come over with dogs from the first day Diezel came home because I wanted him to be socialized but he just seems to care more about people then other dogs. He doesnt really avoid me and there was only 1 situation where he tried hiding in the bedroom when I had a lil furbaby guest for 1 weekend but I put the other puppy in the bedroom so I had some alone time with Diezel and then he seemed to be fine after that. But my biggest fear is also that it will changed Diezels personality long term. Diezel is so friendly and affectionate with me and anyone else who comes here I dont want bringing another puppy in the house to change the way he loves me or anyone else. I wish you the best of luck with your new addition to your family I am sure I will be posting a similar post to this one in the future!