Ditto!

This is so well said...I pray the OP listens ...this is about sharing experiences.

Funny .. it just jumped out at me and made me think of this thread...

Probably some angel leading me to it...I really believe we get the things we need if we always remain open ...

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Good for you!

If someone really loves you, s/he should never make you chose between someone you really love. Instead, try to work things out....

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It's never the dog, how do they learn if we do not teach them. It is up to the owner to teach and TRAIN. perfect post, just suited for this thread.

Good for you, he was not the right man for you if he tells you to get rid of the dog. You did the right thing by leaving a wanna be controlling man.

I just want to mention a story about a time in my life when I had to give up my precious, loved and adored pup. Misty was a poodle/pug mix that someone asked me to take. She was the last puppy from an accidental mating on the street. She was my first dog. She was a wonderful dog, she lived to be 20 years old and we were together for a long stretch of my life. I moved around a lot at that time and my baby was always right there by my side.

At one point the elderly owner of the flat I was living in sold it to a new owner. The new owner was very strict and told me I had to get rid of my dog. I was heartbroken but I couldn't afford to move. I gave her to my sister's MIL who always loved her and was looking for a dog. I cried hysterically every night and hated myself for giving her up and not finding a way to keep her. I knew instantly that I had made a terrible mistake. I prayed to God to find a way for me to have her back.

By some miracle my prayers were answered and I received a call from my sister's MIL asking if I would take her back because having a dog was more work than she had anticipated. I was overjoyed at getting my baby back. I moved out of that place with my baby Misty and never looked back.

Please don't do what I did. You might not be able to get Emma back. I was so blessed to get Misty back. She lived out the rest of her 20 years with me, where she was meant to be.

I just wanted to share my experience giving up a dog that was my cherished companion. I hope this won't happen to anyone else.

Giving up a dog
I lived in a pvt. house in NY for 22 years, then my landlord sold the house, the new landlord wanted my apt. for a family member, I had to move. I wanted to stay in the same area. I called every ad that had an apartment for rent, I told each landlord I had two small yorkies, no one would rent to me with dogs. I went to a agency told them I needed an apartment that would allow two small yorkies, the agent told me it would be very hard to find as no one wanted tenants that had dogs. After 6 months of searching I had to make a decision, I was not about to get rid of my dogs, they were raised together and could not be separated. The only way I could keep my dogs was to buy my own home where no one could tell me how many I could have or tell me I had to get rid of my dogs. I moved two states away, took a commuter bus to my NY job 1 & 1/2 ride. I did this for my dogs, to be able to keep them, that is how I come to live in Pa. for my babies. It was the best thing I did, I had my babies and they had a yard to run and play in. I have NEVER looked back.

Good for you!!! This was so touching I got goose bumps reading it. You did the right thing. I learned my lesson. My babies have NEVER given up on me and i will never again give up on any of them. I learned the hard way.

To the OP:

What do you think of all the responses you have rec'd to your original post?

Looks like she haven't logged in since she posted.... Hopefully, they're working things out.

Getting a dog to me is like the wedding vow
 

To have and to hold from this day forward, For better, for worse, in sickness and health, till death do us part.

JMO, He seems to be so controlling maybe he has forbidden her to use her computer. Controlling starts off small, before you know it you are asking their permission before you do anything.

I would crate the egotistical boy friend. 😊

A small crate. With no pee pads. :D

I say "Amen" to that lol

and watch the snow fall

Please understand my opinion on this topic comes from being in a family who has taken in many of those fur babies (usually cats) that were given up due to their owner's issues and a lifelong career of working with small children - both of which only know what they are initially taught (or in matters such as this, NOT taught). One cat had kidney failure, was on dialysis for two weeks then lived for 6 more years, another was found abused with a broken tail and nerve damage that made her leak urine when she slept so my mpther just put training pads in the areas she slept in, another became diabetic at 13 and my parents took him with them most places for almost 5 yrs so they could administer his daily shot and monitor him. It is always incomprehensible to me when people bring a pet into their home knowing that they are a commitment of possibly 20yrs, then suddenly have a life change and discard the one thing that will love you unconditionally and are most often less costly than therapy, or want to immediately get rid of them once there is the slightest chance they may be inconvenienced in the least bit!

I have only had my puppy for just over a month, and though it took a lot of energy and patience at first to potty train her - tracking her daily activities, coming home from work during lunch or having someone come by throughout the day to take her out, etc. - she was completely housebroken (using the training pad only when needed such as when I'm gone longer than planned, outside all of the rest) by the end of the 2nd week. Just as I always said with my students, I don't care how cute they are, it is my job as the adult to teach them what the correct thing is to do and if they don't, there will be some type of consequence. As a grown man, your bf has the wonderful ability and knowledge to change his outlook/attitude to one of a more beneficial/helpful one while your dog truly won't understand when you get rid of her why she was taken out of her home for doing things you allowed all along when YOU were the one responsible to train her in the first place.

Sorry if I ranted a bit, this is a touchy subject for me!

Food and water bowl outside of crate.

Mama grizzly bears YES, each and every one of YT members got these babies for one thing only, to love, care for them, give them the best life we can,keep them medically healthy, change our life style if necessary and vowed no matter what they would be with us forever. Problems if any would be worked out, never give up, and NEVER be thrown away for any reason what so ever. Then a post like this comes up, BF says get rid of the dog, like it's a worn out shoe to be tossed in the garbage. Then the grizzle bears in us bears it's teeth and the protective claws come out. These babies did not ask to be born, did not ask YOU to take them home. You choose to take them, care for them, they are innocent little critters, depend on us for love, food and their well being. It is now up to us to teach these little ones manners and if that is not done up to someones expectations, they say dump the dog. This could only come from a
cold-hearted person. Mama grizzly bears, you better believe it.

No reply from the OP. :(

Unfortunately sometimes people don't make the best decisions. OP may think her bf is perfect, but come on, nobody's perfect. If she gives in to his ultimatums we all know what the future holds.

But we can also look at it from the dog's point of view. How would the dog feel with the bf in the house and getting all the negative energy from the bf. The dog would not be happy. If she were to surrender to rescue, a foster home and eventually a perfect forever home would be in his future. That is exactly how I came to have Toto. He was an owner surrender. She was pregnant and newly married. The husband TOLD her to get rid of the dogs. The other one is Safari (which I know some of you are familiar with Safari's story). Now Toto is in a good forever home and he's the funniest, most animated and loving yorkie out of all the fosters we've had.

He was not properly trained either. He peed a lot in our brand new house. I mean brand new as in just finished building brand new. We worked with him for several months and now he's better but still not 100%. It takes work, a lot of work! But I'm so lucky to have him.

Keep the Yorkie
 

I agree with the FB post. I do disagree with most of the posters who say lose the boyfriend.
I think OP that you can see the problem , but you have let your dog misbehave and failed to train the dog. That is not good for the dog, for you or your BF. Your BF has given you a long time to step up. The dog is all over his property, and it is not considerate for you to let the problem go on and on.
I think it is good that you ask for help on training. I hope that you get some good training on how to set boundaries for your dog and you let your BF know that you respect his boundaries too. Good luck with BF and your pup!

I sent the OP a PM a couple days ago asking her to come back and let us know what she thinks of our responses. I hope this is not another case of starting a thread that touches a lot of people only to never post again.

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Correct.....solve the problem and send the BF back to his OWN living space, as HE is the intruder into this pups living space, NOT the other way around. If YOU had moved with your dog, into the boyfriends home/living space, then fine, BF can complain and issue ultimatums. However, BF has moved into the pups home.....BF needs to help solve any issue HE has with the set up, including but not limited to, paying for additional training methods for the pup, or returning to his OWN living space and leaving the pup to his.....

(I will remind others that in my initial post, I did encourage training the pup...you can not let the pup use your living space as his toilet, unchecked...nasty and ugly and stinky.....but I have NEVER let a man move his sorry but into MY home, with MY dog and ME, then start issuing rules and recommendations for change....I would never tolerate that.)

I am from a generation where a RESPECTABLE MAN would not move into a woman's living space, then demand changes be made to accommodate his cheap a$$. Those "men" were known as Gigolos in my generation and were rated lower on the "Scale Respectability" than whale turds. Sorry, "new generationers"....that is the way it was old school.....and I certainly would never get rid of a tried and true and loyal and loving friend, to accommodate a man....but that is from years and years of first hand experience dealing with and watching men and relationships rise and fall by the wayside. Trust me, that pup will be devoted to you long after that man hits the highway at a trot!

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