Need help with seperation anxiety!

[celstu1]

My Dexter is anxious whenever I am not holding him. If we are out of the house and anyone else holds him he stares at me until I take him back. If he is down on the floor, he jumps on my legs until I pick him up. I can't take 5 seconds off. Sunday was such a hard day for him & I. We went to visit my grandparents, and I had to hold him the ENTIRE 4 hours we were there. They tried to hold him and he freaked out just trying to get away from them and back to me. My fiance tried to hold him and he struggled and freaked to the point that I have to say just let him come to me, because he cries and pants and struggles and I'm afraid hes going to hurt himself.
After that we went to a friends house for the game. Everyone wanted to hold him but he would struggle so much that they would put him down and he would weave his way through everyone to get back to me. Eventually I had to put him in a room and shut the door because I was literally getting very anxious that I couldn't make him happy and I was not having a good time because he wouldn't get down for 1 second... literally not 1 second. It was a terrible day! I don't know what to do about his anxiety! Its giving me anxiety. I want him to be happy and feel safe and content on his own or with someone else holding him.

He's 6.5 years old, I know I created the monster, but I really need to break him of this habit for his own sake and mine! I feel sooo sorry for the poor little guy fighting and panting and whining and all anxious that I give in and hold him, but man.... its too much for me and I find I leave him home more and more so I don't have to worry about him.

Any ideas ????

[lillymae]

Try taking him out more often & while you are out ask other people to hold him & that person give him a treat. I did this with one of my fosters who had the same problem & after awhile he thought everyone we passed was there to hold him & he would nearly jump out of my arms to get to them.

[southernbelle04]

When we first brought Katie Scarlett home she was soooo attached to me. Well, she still is, but she is getting better. The thing that helped us to work on her socialization skills and the separation anxiety was doggy daycare. We have a wonderful facility in our town and I take her there at least once a week. She just adores it! She jumps right out of the car and right into the arms of the receptionist when we get there. She doesn't even look back to tell Mommy bye! LOL. After taking her there one time, she was a different dog. She loves to be social with everyone now. She will let anyone hold her. She loves all other dogs. It really helped us. Of course at the end of the day, she is glad to see Mommy, but I love that I know I can take her there to let her do her own thing without me some. And since we have been taking her, she is a lot more independent at home. She used to stay right with me every single second. Now I find her wandering off through the house alone and even have caught her sleeping in another room on her own. She also now will stay in the den when I get up and go out of the room some. She used to be right on my heels when I would leave. She still does follow me a good bit, but she is more independent.

[Teresa Ford]

Doggy Tantrum, I want my Mama !
I too work with rescues. Some dogs have a very hard time trusting people. Some dogs just prefer one person and really don't want anyone else. In most cases the dog can be desensitized and taught to accept others touching them. Myself I do not encourage others to hold a jittery dog. Petting is fine. People do not hold large adult dogs. Adult Yorkies should not be held or carried a lot. This creates a false dependance. Some Yorkies never like being held and will only accept it from their own family. You can try: 1. Hold your dog in your arms. Have a person your Yorkie knows, sit on the floor or a chair or sofa and call the dog and wiggle a treat;You say in a happy voice the cue word, Friend and put your dog on the floor. The friend should give him/her a tiny tasty treat. The friend should allow the Yorkie to jump down when it wants to. Repeat this exercise 4 or 5 times a week with different people. It may take a couple weeks to make a difference.
2. I also teach my dogs the cue word Friend, they are not allowed to go to people that are not family without the cue word Friend.

[SnugsColeman]

I agree w/Teresa I would not let anyone hold him while he is this way... just cause he is not a puppy you can still teach him a new trick. Do as Teresa said but having others call for him w/a treat...it will take time but will work. And make sure they dont try to grab for him or anything let him come to them in his own time.

[Potter]

Pao is like that too and he is going to be six in June. When I invite people over, I just let him be. When I am busy ie cooking, I just put him down and tell him no when he wanted to be picked up and eventually, he will go warm up with the guests he likes and asked for scratches.

I don't really bring him to friend's house since I don't like the endless possibilities of dangers of having kids running around since he isn't kids friendly.

[celstu1]

Dex is fine at home, I just can't get him to be ok out of the house. Like the house we were at is their dog sitters. He LOVES her! But not at her house, only at my house. He loves my mom too....but not out of the house! Ive been with my fiancé for 4 years, living with him for almost 2. He has 2 older kids. The kids are awesome to the dogs, give them treats, take them for walks, brush them, etc... Yet they WILL NOT go near the kids hen they try to touch or pet them. However if I am busy or out, the dogs have NO problems hanging out with the kids. It's all on me! Uugghh
Thanks so much for the advice!!! We shall use these ideas and keep trying!