TIRED. Help.
 

So here's my story: It's 4 am, I'm tired, I'm angry, and I'm fed up.

I don't know what to do any more. When I first got Bigsby he slept in his kennel without any problem. A few times he would whine for maybe 10 minutes tops, and then settle down and go to bed. I would let him up on my bed some nights, but he didn't seem to mind whenever he had to go back into the crate. The reason I'm keeping him in his kennel is because I won't be here every night, I'm going back to college this fall and he needs to learn that sometimes there isn't going to be anyone else to sleep with. I don't understand why NOW all of a sudden he whines ALL. NIGHT. LONG.

I've spent the past two hours cry and pleading for him to just lay down and go to sleep. Over and over. I've left the room and it just escalates. I don't know what to do. I have a 9 hour shift today and I can't take this. I cannot do this. I don't know what to do. My mom finally came down and took him upstairs with her, just letting him get what he wants, so now he's just been reinforced that he can just whine and eventually someone is going to let him out of the kennel. I'm SICK of this.

If ANYONE has ANY idea as to what I should do, PLEASE let me know.

Mind you, if I seem angry, I'm not... I'm absolutely furious. You have to remember, I'm running on maybe one hour of restless sleep and have to go to work in 6 hours. Already past the point where sleep comes easy, and I'm ready to rip out all my hair. I already taken anti-anxiety medication, this issue is NOT helping in any way shape or form so I would appreciate a little sympathy and people not just telling me to not put him in the crate... after all, I didn't spend 150 dollars on it just to NOT use it.

No sympathy here. Sorry, but once you put them in your bed, they don't understand why they can't be there all of the time. So, stop being furious and try to be understanding of why he is crying.

Have a question. Do I understand that you are going back to school soon and will be leaving him with your mom anyway?

I agree with Karen, although I'm a new yorkie owner I have never brought my baby in bed with me and I don't let anyone in my family either. He doesn't even cry at night now, only when he's first in his crate for a few minutes then off to bed. You might have to restart again... put him in his kennel and let him know that you won't pick him up if he cries. If you can't sleep put his kennel in a different room where you can still sleep.. I think he'll eventually learn that once he's in the kennel, that's his bed and no other is
Good Luck!

I have to say...you changed the pace by letting him come to bed. You can't expect him to understand, when it's not convenient for you. So, that bridge is burned.

How about this to resolve, if you are there he could sleep with you, if not and your mom finally came downstairs .....on nights you aren't there, why then can't he sleep with her?

This is good training for parenthood...same rules everyday..no changing horses in the middle of the stream...it is confusing to dogs and kids if one day you have one set of rules of behavior and then the next it is totally different...

My baby cried a lot at first in his crate but its just because he wants to be with you. Try putting his crate on your bed or next to your bed on the night stand so he can see you. I had to first put my hand in the crate for him to stop crying so he could fall asleep and then gradually he would sleep without my hand having to be in there, and so forth. I may have been a bit drastic but it worked and now that he's older and I'm home every night he DOES sleep in bed with me, but if you want him to get used to the crate you need to work with him slowly.

I've only had Buddy just over a week now, but I can tell you, Yorkie's are special dogs. They love being with their masters and really enjoy going on walks, being played with and being part of your life. Buddy sleeps with us and so far has never once been a problem. He doesn't moan, cry or complain through the night.

Owning any animal is a big commitment. They need attention and lots of personal time. They can't just be thrown in a crate and expected to be happy about it. It sounds like you're gone most of the day and your mom has your responsibilites with the poor little dog.

It's your call, but the dog deserves more than a few hours of play time and then a lock down in a cell.

you need more patience.... you can't get annoyed at this small situation only because your dog is young. having a new puppy will definately test you on many levels and you need to remain calm and not angry (especially at the dog). that being said, i agree with other people's comments. you need to retrain your dog and give some tough love. if the dog is whinning let it be. don't go and baby it because it will continue to throw tamper tantrums.

It seems like you have a lot going on. school, work, social life etc. until your pup is older i think you need to prioritize to fit your puppy. puppies are a lot of work!

Well. Having dealt with a colicky newborn (i.e. up all night) and having to show up for work in the morning ~ I can identify with your frustration. It's hard.

BUT, he is picking up on your frustration, anger; and stress. That is not helping him to sleep in his crate.

And, just like I should have listened with my pediatrician said "Never, ever put your baby in bed with you" . .probably you should not have allowed it either. My own son slept in my bed until I was finally able to get him out. Probably every Mom has heard of the 'Ferber' method. No fun.

Your furbaby is no different. He got used to sleeping next to your warm body and hearbeat and he liked it. He doesnt understand what you are trying to accomplish; he doesn't understand that you are tired and have to work; all that is beyond what he can comprehend.

IF you are determined for him to sleep in his crate, you are going to have to tough it out for a few nights. That means, no crying and begging with him. That means, fix up his crate with some lovely warm blankets, a favorite toy or chewy . . and leave him alone. Yes, he will cry for a few night; but he will soon learn that he must now sleep in his crate.

Either that or give in and let him sleep in your bed so you will both get some rest.

Think that's hard? Try it with a baby.

:thumbup: This is the suggestion I was going to give

He just wants to be near you. Put the crate on a night stand where he can see you. Good luck

As others have said, once you've let him sleep in your bed with you, it will be extremely difficult to get him to accept his crate. Yorkies aboslutely crave that human connection and that's what I love about them! I just gave up on the crate training one night and have had the best sleep since. Now Bullet and Rio take up the majority of the space on our King sized bed, while my hubby and I sleep on the edge, ever aware of our 3 lb. babies! And I wouldn't have it any other way.

I will give you some sympathy, it can be very demanding the first few months with a puppy especially a yorkie puppy. They are very much like having a skin baby. Anyhow I disagree with some on here and agree with others.My two adapt very easily to where they sleep . On occasions they sleep in our bed or next to it in their own bed or when we are on holiday they sleep downstairs in the dining room and they just adapt to where I decide they sleep however your baby is a puppy and like someone said your baby just needs to be near you. I would put the crate next to your bed so your baby feels secure and then you can both sleep. Good luck xx;)

This is why Rizzo slept in his crate from day one, up until he was neutered and had been sleeping all through the night for a couple months. Now he knows, if he goes into the crate it's sleepy time, and it's totally pointless to moan about it because somehow every time he goes in there, his "skin-mom" goes deaf, lol. I don't see the problem with letting him sleep in your bed if you've already started it, if you aren't there he can sleep with your mom...(at least that is how it sounds from your post)
Sorry, but it's hard to change their routines once you get them started, he prefers sleeping next to you over sleeping alone in a crate. I can dig it. Good luck, but it sounds like you're going to have a rough few days of no sleep from having to ignore the puppy cries. Oh, and talking to him, or coming into the room where he is to ask him to be quiet isn't going to help at all. It just shows him that you do hear him and if he cries more then maybe you'll let him out. If you insist he sleeps in the crate, move the crate to your room where he can see you, it should help...

You can try putting something with your scent on it in the crate with him..

I don't know if you've tried this but another thing you can do is cover his crate with a blanket. That way it will be completely dark and he'll know its bed time. This really helped with mine as well although I ended up just keeping his crate next to me as the comfort of seeing me helped him sleep. Best of luck!

I consulted an trainer who was an animal behaviorist for some issues I was having with Buster. He had some suggestions for when he whined in his crate. He said to put a blanket over the crate and every time Buster whined to hit the crate lightly but enough to rattle it and to do this everytime he whined until he learned not to. Since the cage is draped he does not know what is causing the noise but that he is corrected everytime he whines. I must state that this trainer usually deals with severe aggression problem dogs and does not believe in using harsh methods. I tried this and it did work but I really had trouble with being the tough mommy. I prefer Buster sleeps in bed with me. He does go into his crate for periods of time now (without the cover) and does not complain after the initial, what the hey let me out. I still occassionally use the cover it helps when he is overloaded with excitement because it is like a sensory deprivation chamber. Sort of like when you put a cover over a bird cage. I only do this as a timeout and I remove the cover when he is quiet. I would not always leave the cover on because that seems excessive but once they get sleepy they usually calm down. Remember you are not punishing the dog but trying to retrain their current behavior. Good luck and I hope you get some sleep. They can tell when you are upset with them and if you are yelling at them they see it as you barking at them so they start barking back as they key into the energy.

Having been up much of the night with Tallulah having digestive issues (she's ok this morning) I can sympathize with your sleep deprivation anxiety and anger. But sympathy is not going to solve the problem for you.

We still have some bedtime problems ourselves, but we have a routine that's beginning to work. I got a DAP (pheremone) diffuser that is plugged in right next to Tallulah's mesh pen and my bed. That has helped a lot. We go to bed a half hour early now, and use that time for her to settle down and fall asleep next to me. Once she's been sleeping a few minutes, I get her up, cuddle her in my arms a little, and put her in her bed, all the time telling her in my best whisper what a good girl she is and how much I love her. She usually goes right back to sleep and stays in her bed until I get up. I really believe staying calm myself helps soothe her anxieties.

As hard as it is, you're the grown up in this situation and you have to let go of the anger and frustration if you're going to solve it. You can't blame the dog for behaving like a dog -- you have to figure out how to help him with the anxiety issue on his terms, not yours. And especially do not punish him or yell at him for his behavior - that's just going to increase his anxiety and he won't understand why you're doing it. The others have given you some good suggestions so I'm not going to repeat them. You're experiencing what a lot of us have gone through (or are still going through) so trust me, we do understand what it's like to go without sleep.

All I have to add is good luck!

I don't think I will ever start the sleeping in bed part ... my Kody is doing excellent in his crate at night. He may whine for a couple of minutes but then he settles down and off to sleep.

Puppies are a lot of work - I agree with newborn description given above.

I drape Kody's crate at night too ... he gets easily distracted when me or my hubby gets up, this has helped a lot.

I had to laugh when I read this, same situation here. BF once said he is not sleeping in bed if they were and I said you know where the couch is. Nip that in the bud right there. LOL

I have let them sleep in there room on some nights. I just wait till they are very tired and picked them up and go put on their beds. That usually works too. Also try putting a shirt of yours that has your scent on it in the crate. I do that sometimes when I leave for work and my two are acting sad.

To those who don't remember, OP's family adopted this yorkie as a rescue in October, 2010, and he is somewhere around one year of age.

I'll give a little sympathy as murphy's law says when sleep deprived all will go wrong. I'm a student, I'm broke and hey I get tired too and cranky too, so I feel your pain. It will get better, it just may take some time.

I have a few things to add

Be careful if you cover with a blanket, pick a light weight one and don't cover all four sides. I had a friend who lost a puppy because she left the dog in its crate for an hour (roomate was home) and the stupid roomate threw a blanket over the crate cause it wouldn't stop barking. when she returned the puppy was gone, it had no air. Needless to say the friend moved out and never spoke to the stupid roomate again, so I'm very paranoid with blankets over crates.

Also try and reward quiet times. So if the puppy is in the crate and is quiet, give a treat and praise. then try walking a few feet away, the moment you get silence praise and treat. Instead of punishing the barking, and as you mentioned letting the pup get their way, reward the thing you want.

Harley has just started barking when I walk away from his room, and I just clued in today that he's doing it cause he knows I walk back towards him and give him attention when he does it, so now I started rewarding when he is quiet after a bark.

I hope that helps, be sure to give us an update!

OMG!!!! How horrific!! That poor puppy :( I would have never thought of that, what a scary thing to happen! :(

I have been very fortunate in that every puppy we have had, I have never had one cry at night. When they are babies, I usually would fed them alittle Gerber Rice or Oatmeal cereal at night and having their little tummies full seem to help them sleep too. Maybe putting one of his babies in bed with him will help too. Once they sleep in your bed it is hard to ever go back, because they do want to be with you. I know its hard to be tired and sleep deprived but try to have patience, he just loves you and wants to be with you. They are just like babies.

I understand your frustration. I tried to crate Teddi when she was little and she would just cry so I started the bed thing but realized in the last year that what would happen if someone has to watch her that won't let her in the bed then there will be an issue so I started putting her in a crate at nite occasionally. The first time she cried but I just told her to be quiet and after a few times she fell asleep. I now put her in the crate a few days a week and in my bed the other days so she is used to both of them. Her crying now isn't nearly as bad as it was in the beginning and nothing compared to when she was little. She is getting the hang of it now. You might want to start on a weekend or when you don't work the next day. Good luck!!

I agree so sorry to hear that happened.

My rescue was a pup mill rescue...crating him was cruel and a crate was not a bed or a room or den it was a cage to him and very traumatic...however my other dogs either came partially crate trained or I got so young they easily took to it...of course we had some nights that were worse than others but now I don't even have to shut a crate door and they go to their bed willingly-
FOR MY PUP MILL RESCUE A CRATE WAS NOT A GOOD IDEA I USED A PLAY PEN INSTEAD...however if this dog was in a crate and this was broken by your behavior then you can go back to it (make sure your crate is large enough please too many people use too small and uncomfortable crates-would you use it in their shoes?)
1. consistency
2. just use a blanket and an attention getting knock on the crate not a crate jolting or rocking bang please
3 have you tried a (ticking) clock under the bed in kennel (or the ticking stuffies for pups) the ones for infants are cheaper and puppy safe too
4 I give a safe toy in the crate
5 put a blanket in with your scent on it
6 personally the dog crates are in my room next to my bed they see smell and hear me, but like I said now we don't even shut the door a year later they are comfortable and calm with their "safety area" AKA den/bed at night
7. consider Dogswell Mello Mut jerky before bed time it's homeopathic, organic and made from free ranging chickens (the small yorkie does is one stick cut into 6 equal pieces but you can give up to half a stick for a dog under 5lbs)

Ear plugs.

He'll get the message eventually.

Getting a new dog or puppy is never easy it should be expected that there is going to be some things that are hard because they are having to adjust to there new home and everything that is new to them. It worries me that you are so angry about this because when people are this angry they sometimes do things with out thinking or without thinking rationally. Dogs can also pick up on how you are feeling and it can cause them to be anxious or act up.You need to remember he only knows what you teach him if you react and dont ignore the crying other then takeing him potty then he knows if he cries it is going to get him something. Maybe having a dog is not the right thing for you right now? I understand being tired but I dont understand being as angry as you sound its bad for you and for the dog.

I have to agree with yorkieusa. You can't expect to take the yorkie in bed with sometimes and not other times. They don't understand. I can also sympathize with you because the day after I got Zoe our Shorkie, I fell down the stairs and broke my hip. I was in the hospital for a month and when I came out Zoe was totally out of control. Instead of using a crate I bought a play pen for her that seemed to work for awhile. What I'm trying to say is that once the damage is done it's kind of hard to undo it. Not trying to sound mean but if your mom is taking the dog upstairs with her why don't you let the dog sleep with your mom? I assume that when you go to college you are going to leave the dog with her or maybe I'm wrong.