Will I love my Snickers less after having a human baby??? - Page 2 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

bribunny · 05-13-2010, 06:17 AM

It's a different kind of love. For the first few weeks, it'll seem hard to give attention to your dog when you've got a crying infant. But, in my situation the dog became the babies protector and became a excellent nap partner while the baby napped. Then eventually, the baby and dog become the best of friends and its so cute to watch both of them together. I attached a pic, but this isn't the dog we had before, our new one. Same concept!

I will suggest one thing though, if your dog hasn't been around babies carry a baby doll around for a few weeks before delivery. It'll help them get used to it, especially smaller dogs who aren't quite prepared.

yavenay · 05-13-2010, 06:21 AM

This is a little different but the same. The reason I believe it's the same is because we are talking about feelings.

I sort of know how you feel in terms of loving one over the other. Even though I am not referring to skinkids but furbabies. I personally don't have any children so on that part I cannot relate. However I can relate on the part about loving and caring for others whether it be an animal or human.

I've had (and still have) my cat for 12 yrs before getting Brandi. Before I got Brandi, i would lavish all kinds of attention on my very spoiled and standoffish cat. When I got Brandi, my attention to my cat shifted to Brandi. I rationalized it by telling myself that Zoey (the cat) didn't want or need my attention as much as Brandi. While, I would never give Zoey up and do love her very much, I don't play with her as much as I used to. It's something I do feel guilty about because I can see when she wants my attention. Now I make it a point to give her special attention just so she doesn't feel left out or neglected.

I think you sound like you would have enough love for the both of them. While your skinbaby my need more love and attention for now, I'm sure you won't neglect your furbabies as well.

Sweet Apple · 05-13-2010, 06:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by viviansnickers

OMG, I'm so nervous about something that still has not happened for me!! Last weekend I went to a baby shower and was talking to some girlfriends who are also LOVE THEIR DOG MORE THAN ANYTHING who informed me that they keep hearing new moms say their doggiebaby's get "less loved" & "annoying" after having a human baby!!!!!

We plan to start having a family this fall!!!!!!!!!

WHAT!????!! I understand I will have to devote my time MUCH differently but IS THIS TRUE!!!?? I guess "loving them less" is really in your heart, but will Snickers get ANNOYING to me??? NEVER!!!! Meaning, they said, if he has a random accident or doesn't listen, that it's really annoying!!!

NO!!!!!!! How can this be!!! I don't think I will be this way. Even my babe says after we have a baby, he will make sure Snickers is still waited on hand and foot LOL!!!!! We will not be changing anything in Snickers' life post baby---he will still sleep with us FOR SURE!! (Many change that after the baby comes!!)

Sad!!!!

Snick & Viv

Admittedly, Viv, I haven't met you in person, but from our ongoing pen pal status, I get the feeling that you are a real and true person...I don't think, for one minute, that Snick is going to get any more on your nerves, or that he will be slighted, in the least...I think there will be adjustments for the four of you, or five or six or whatever lolol...If that were the case, then no one could have more than one skin kid, right?...Bottom line is I think, if the mom stops loving (liking) the pup, after a baby, she probably didn't really love them w/all her heart, to begin with...I don't get that possiblity from you...

After all, and some people won't accept this, but love is a choice, and out of that choice an emotion follows, not the other way around...

p.s...off the subject, I'm having to chop up Buzz' kibble ...Must be a spoiled guy thing lol...

Lee B · 05-13-2010, 07:17 AM

The ability to love is not finite. Your heart expands to accept all you wish to have enter - and sometimes they wiggle in, anyway

. When a pet dies and you get a "replacement" - nothing *replaces* your beloved pet. Your heart just expands to accept a new one.

Human babies are a bit different because they need more attention for a longer period of time. New moms are exhausted, and time to yourself is limited. BUT, whereas your lap space may diminish a bit, you still have sides. When you're tending to the baby's needs, Snickers can sit beside you and get some skritches and lovin', too.

I'm a firm believer: let your dog (or cat) stay in your lap while you're pregnant. They can hear the baby's heartbeat through your belly, and they can feel it move. When the baby arrives, it's not such a stranger. Let Snickers check the baby out from head to toe to familiarize himself with the newcomer.

When the baby's crying, and you don't know why ... when you're up to your eyeballs in laundry and it's raining ... and Snickers wants to go out, or drops a ball at your feet ... if you're human, you'll get annoyed. But if you love him, you'll take a deep breath, bend over and get that ball, and give it a toss down the hallway.

You'll both do better for the diversion.

My "animals" are family members. Logically, I understand that humans take precedence, but emotionally - *emotionally* they are all equal and all get the time they need according to their needs.

You'll find a way, too.

motomomma317 · 05-13-2010, 07:30 AM

There are days I love my dogs more then my son (who by the way is a teenager). My dogs don't get lippy, or ask for money. In most cases they listen.... not all but most. Sure I still have to clean up after the puppy but its usually much easier.

In all seriousness I really think that most people who have a special bond with there dog (they don't just have it around for the cute factor) will still have that bond. You will worry about the baby at first when it comes home if the dog will accept it and so forth. Then when the baby gets to moving around and chasing the dog your gonna start to worry if the dogs gonna be ok. Always good to have a safety spot for the dog as this stage. like some place it can hide away when its tired of being chased.

some people have a hard time adjusting to being a new mother. Its a lot of work. Sometimes the dog will fall by the wayside. Its a fact of life. when the baby is sick or teething or just not getting the sleep everyone needs. Those are not everyday things tho. I always thought when my son was a child My dog would sleep with me every night too. I didn't change the game plan my dog did. He would sleep under my sons crib and when I would go in for his night time feedings he would lay on the floor next to us while i fed him. Then he would roll back under the bed and fall asleep. In the years that followed that dog would never leave my sons side. anywhere he went the dog went. Altho not a yorkie I believe any dog can attach itself to a child.

viviansnickers · 05-13-2010, 07:32 AM

Oh my, these answers are INCREDIBLE. Really, they are, there are too many to point out, I thank you all so much. Such great words from such wise people!!! I think the fact that I worry about it, is ensuring me that Snick will never felt left out or unloved.

Snickers LOVES babies....he just wants to sniff them and smell the new smells. He has been around so many of them and has always done very well. When our friends brought their 6 month old over and Snickers saw me cooing and oooing and awwing all over the baby, he did get jealous. He would get up onto my leg or if I was sitting, he would put his paws on my back and "dig" into my back. As soon as I included him, he was fine. He does the same if I give another dog too much attention. My lil boy.....I love him...

He will learn to share Mommy and Daddy.

I just pray I will be able to take as good of care for him as I do now. His eyes are always cleaned, his raw and kibble always ready. That's what I think I fear, forgetting something for him b/c I'll be so occupied. Or that I will forget to give him his attention...

. Thankfully my husband is prob more in love with Snick than I am.

I worry too much!!

Snick & Viv
ps...PLEASE KEEP THE ADVISE COMING!!! IT'S AWESOME!

MomofSkye · 05-13-2010, 07:40 AM

We have 2 kids(one 4 1/2 and the other 15months who is about to go Open heart Surgery) and 2 labs and 3 Yorkies and they all get loving. Yes the Yorkies come to work with us. They sleep with us, the labs sleep in the bed with my son(he has a queen size bed)One of the Yokies like to sleep in my daughters Toddler bed which is next to ours)

jencar98 · 05-13-2010, 07:55 AM

Vivian, in your case, you will do just fine loving both and giving them all they need. It's obvious from you even thinking this far ahead, what a dedicated, loving yorkie mom you are and I'm sure you'll make certain neither Snickers nor your new baby lack for anything.

misslissa · 05-13-2010, 08:19 AM

I have three dogs and two kids two kids that are not even mine.
I got full custody of my brother and sister who are 9 and 16 and i can tell you that they get all the love that the dog gets and the dogs gets way more attention then they do of course they are kids they can amuse themselves but if i can find the time and love for everyone at 21 with a full time job and collage im sure that a person who is ready to start a family will have no problems adapting to love and give everyone equal attention

RebelBelle · 05-13-2010, 11:40 AM

To me havin' a new skin baby would be like getting a new yorkie puppy. When we got Beau, I was very concerned about Jamie feeling less loved and getting less attention. But it was really just twice the love and twice the cuddles PLUS a new friend to play with... Yes there was a period of adjustment for everyone but now I can't ever imagine going back.

By the way, you must be a VERY patient lady, because Jamie and Beau already drive me bonkers some days.

Annoyed wouldn't even come close to describing the madness that is my house. (My boys are very vocal when wrestling and running and toy snatching.)

Rhetts_mama · 05-13-2010, 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cirlonde

Okay...so this might sound bad but hear me out...

I have the opposite concern. What if after I have a child, I love the dog more than the kid!?! I don't mean the general every day kind of love, but the bad days kind of love. You know, the kid grows up and gets a mouth and back talks me or won't mind or whatever. And then I look at Chloe who is so sweet and well behaved and snuggly.... I worry about that.

Back on subject, my cousin has two kids and a female schnauzer. She'd had the schnauzer for several years before she had the first baby. Her first child was a boy and the schnauzer didn't much care for him. Well, my cousin was telling me that, of course, kinda made her resent the dog a bit. Then about eight months ago, she had a little girl. The schnauzer fell in love with this baby, watched over her protectively; total 180 from her behavior with the boy. All of a sudden, she's back in my cousin's good graces. I share because that's really the only story I have about puppy parents having kids.

-C

I have days where I definitely love my dogs more than my kids

Luckily, it all balances out in the end.

We had one child before getting our beautiful golden. Having our second child didn't diminish our love for her in the slightest. In fact, she was my constant bedside companion while I was on bedrest for premature labor. Afterwards, she slept under the crib to keep an eye on the baby. To her very last day, she was always the last one to bed- she needed to make sure that all 'her' babies were present and accounted for.

Ringo1 · 05-13-2010, 03:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lee B

The ability to love is not finite. Your heart expands to accept all you wish to have enter - and sometimes they wiggle in, anyway

. When a pet dies and you get a "replacement" - nothing *replaces* your beloved pet. Your heart just expands to accept a new one.

Human babies are a bit different because they need more attention for a longer period of time. New moms are exhausted, and time to yourself is limited. BUT, whereas your lap space may diminish a bit, you still have sides. When you're tending to the baby's needs, Snickers can sit beside you and get some skritches and lovin', too.

I'm a firm believer: let your dog (or cat) stay in your lap while you're pregnant. They can hear the baby's heartbeat through your belly, and they can feel it move. When the baby arrives, it's not such a stranger. Let Snickers check the baby out from head to toe to familiarize himself with the newcomer.

When the baby's crying, and you don't know why ... when you're up to your eyeballs in laundry and it's raining ... and Snickers wants to go out, or drops a ball at your feet ... if you're human, you'll get annoyed. But if you love him, you'll take a deep breath, bend over and get that ball, and give it a toss down the hallway.

You'll both do better for the diversion.

My "animals" are family members. Logically, I understand that humans take precedence, but emotionally - *emotionally* they are all equal and all get the time they need according to their needs.

You'll find a way, too.

This is exactly how I felt when my son was born. Yes, at times I did get annoyed. A new mother is tired and overwhelmed . . did I mention tired??? By necessity, you will find yourself spending most of your time with your newborn. Newborns require a lot of care!

But it wasn't long before the baby, stroller, and my little maltese were all packed up and going for a walk together every evening. Casper did have to take a backseat for a little while - but we found a way to meet everyone's needs . . on most days.

My son is a teen-ager now and absolutely adores dogs and vice versa.

You can do it!

MyLilReese · 05-13-2010, 04:17 PM

Viv it wasn't too long ago that I posted almost this very same post when I found out I was pregnant...and to this day I still worry about it sometimes! My baby is due in October and im excited for the baby to get here. It is mine and my husbands first child. But I admit I worry about Reese, cuz I love her to death. To me she was like my first child, cause as we all know yorkies are just like kids...lol. But I know with the help of my husband she will still get all the attention she needs and probably more!

cathys · 05-13-2010, 05:03 PM

Don't worry so much about this, I have 5 skin babies and my furbaby is still important. My kids did take a lot of my time, but you just can't beat the fur kids for the unconditional love. They don't talk back, the don't know how to say no. They let you pick your TV shows. It changes things, but it works out. You'll be surprised how much your heart can grow, it's amazing. Life is what you makes of it and so is family.

viviansnickers · 05-14-2010, 04:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MyLilReese

Viv it wasn't too long ago that I posted almost this very same post when I found out I was pregnant...and to this day I still worry about it sometimes! My baby is due in October and im excited for the baby to get here. It is mine and my husbands first child. But I admit I worry about Reese, cuz I love her to death. To me she was like my first child, cause as we all know yorkies are just like kids...lol. But I know with the help of my husband she will still get all the attention she needs and probably more!

Yes! Yes! Yes!!! Wow, we are in the same boat, but you are much closer!!! Wow....you will have to let me know how things go if you even get a chance to get on YT after your bundle of joy comes!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!! I'm so happy for you, a baby is a miracle!! Are you going to do anything special to help Reese get comfy with the baby? I don't think I am going to try the babydoll thing, I can see myself leaving the babydoll on the floor or something, and I think dogs can sense when something is alive and when it's made of plastic

. I do try to have Snick around babies as much as I can and as long as the baby's parents are ok with it.

Hugs!
Viv

05-13-2010, 06:17 AM	#16
bribunny YT Addict Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: The South Posts: 272	It's a different kind of love. For the first few weeks, it'll seem hard to give attention to your dog when you've got a crying infant. But, in my situation the dog became the babies protector and became a excellent nap partner while the baby napped. Then eventually, the baby and dog become the best of friends and its so cute to watch both of them together. I attached a pic, but this isn't the dog we had before, our new one. Same concept! I will suggest one thing though, if your dog hasn't been around babies carry a baby doll around for a few weeks before delivery. It'll help them get used to it, especially smaller dogs who aren't quite prepared. Attached Thumbnails

05-13-2010, 06:21 AM	#17
yavenay Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Delaware Posts: 2,663	This is a little different but the same. The reason I believe it's the same is because we are talking about feelings. I sort of know how you feel in terms of loving one over the other. Even though I am not referring to skinkids but furbabies. I personally don't have any children so on that part I cannot relate. However I can relate on the part about loving and caring for others whether it be an animal or human. I've had (and still have) my cat for 12 yrs before getting Brandi. Before I got Brandi, i would lavish all kinds of attention on my very spoiled and standoffish cat. When I got Brandi, my attention to my cat shifted to Brandi. I rationalized it by telling myself that Zoey (the cat) didn't want or need my attention as much as Brandi. While, I would never give Zoey up and do love her very much, I don't play with her as much as I used to. It's something I do feel guilty about because I can see when she wants my attention. Now I make it a point to give her special attention just so she doesn't feel left out or neglected. I think you sound like you would have enough love for the both of them. While your skinbaby my need more love and attention for now, I'm sure you won't neglect your furbabies as well. Last edited by yavenay; 05-13-2010 at 06:23 AM.

05-13-2010, 07:32 AM	#21
viviansnickers Snick&Viv= BFF Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Michigan Posts: 1,755	Oh my, these answers are INCREDIBLE. Really, they are, there are too many to point out, I thank you all so much. Such great words from such wise people!!! I think the fact that I worry about it, is ensuring me that Snick will never felt left out or unloved. Snickers LOVES babies....he just wants to sniff them and smell the new smells. He has been around so many of them and has always done very well. When our friends brought their 6 month old over and Snickers saw me cooing and oooing and awwing all over the baby, he did get jealous. He would get up onto my leg or if I was sitting, he would put his paws on my back and "dig" into my back. As soon as I included him, he was fine. He does the same if I give another dog too much attention. My lil boy.....I love him... He will learn to share Mommy and Daddy. I just pray I will be able to take as good of care for him as I do now. His eyes are always cleaned, his raw and kibble always ready. That's what I think I fear, forgetting something for him b/c I'll be so occupied. Or that I will forget to give him his attention.... Thankfully my husband is prob more in love with Snick than I am. I worry too much!! Snick & Viv ps...PLEASE KEEP THE ADVISE COMING!!! IT'S AWESOME! __________________ -Vivian Mommy to my cuddlebug baby boys-Snickers & Reesie

05-13-2010, 07:55 AM	#23
jencar98 Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 6,435 Blog Entries: 3	Vivian, in your case, you will do just fine loving both and giving them all they need. It's obvious from you even thinking this far ahead, what a dedicated, loving yorkie mom you are and I'm sure you'll make certain neither Snickers nor your new baby lack for anything. __________________ ~Ruby, Reno, Razz, & Jack~

05-13-2010, 08:19 AM	#24
misslissa YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: canton ohio us Posts: 1,574	I have three dogs and two kids two kids that are not even mine. I got full custody of my brother and sister who are 9 and 16 and i can tell you that they get all the love that the dog gets and the dogs gets way more attention then they do of course they are kids they can amuse themselves but if i can find the time and love for everyone at 21 with a full time job and collage im sure that a person who is ready to start a family will have no problems adapting to love and give everyone equal attention __________________ Don't say I love you unless you mean it, but if you do say it a lot. People forget.

05-13-2010, 07:17 AM	#19
Lee B YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Land O' Lakes, FL Posts: 735	The ability to love is not finite. Your heart expands to accept all you wish to have enter - and sometimes they wiggle in, anyway . When a pet dies and you get a "replacement" - nothing replaces your beloved pet. Your heart just expands to accept a new one. Human babies are a bit different because they need more attention for a longer period of time. New moms are exhausted, and time to yourself is limited. BUT, whereas your lap space may diminish a bit, you still have sides. When you're tending to the baby's needs, Snickers can sit beside you and get some skritches and lovin', too. I'm a firm believer: let your dog (or cat) stay in your lap while you're pregnant. They can hear the baby's heartbeat through your belly, and they can feel it move. When the baby arrives, it's not such a stranger. Let Snickers check the baby out from head to toe to familiarize himself with the newcomer. When the baby's crying, and you don't know why ... when you're up to your eyeballs in laundry and it's raining ... and Snickers wants to go out, or drops a ball at your feet ... if you're human, you'll get annoyed. But if you love him, you'll take a deep breath, bend over and get that ball, and give it a toss down the hallway. You'll both do better for the diversion. My "animals" are family members. Logically, I understand that humans take precedence, but emotionally - emotionally they are all equal and all get the time they need according to their needs. You'll find a way, too.

05-13-2010, 07:30 AM	#20
motomomma317 YT Addict Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: ohio Posts: 319	There are days I love my dogs more then my son (who by the way is a teenager). My dogs don't get lippy, or ask for money. In most cases they listen.... not all but most. Sure I still have to clean up after the puppy but its usually much easier. In all seriousness I really think that most people who have a special bond with there dog (they don't just have it around for the cute factor) will still have that bond. You will worry about the baby at first when it comes home if the dog will accept it and so forth. Then when the baby gets to moving around and chasing the dog your gonna start to worry if the dogs gonna be ok. Always good to have a safety spot for the dog as this stage. like some place it can hide away when its tired of being chased. some people have a hard time adjusting to being a new mother. Its a lot of work. Sometimes the dog will fall by the wayside. Its a fact of life. when the baby is sick or teething or just not getting the sleep everyone needs. Those are not everyday things tho. I always thought when my son was a child My dog would sleep with me every night too. I didn't change the game plan my dog did. He would sleep under my sons crib and when I would go in for his night time feedings he would lay on the floor next to us while i fed him. Then he would roll back under the bed and fall asleep. In the years that followed that dog would never leave my sons side. anywhere he went the dog went. Altho not a yorkie I believe any dog can attach itself to a child.

05-13-2010, 07:40 AM	#22
MomofSkye Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Tullahoma Tn Posts: 38	We have 2 kids(one 4 1/2 and the other 15months who is about to go Open heart Surgery) and 2 labs and 3 Yorkies and they all get loving. Yes the Yorkies come to work with us. They sleep with us, the labs sleep in the bed with my son(he has a queen size bed)One of the Yokies like to sleep in my daughters Toddler bed which is next to ours)

05-13-2010, 11:40 AM	#25
RebelBelle Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Madison, MS Posts: 2,597	To me havin' a new skin baby would be like getting a new yorkie puppy. When we got Beau, I was very concerned about Jamie feeling less loved and getting less attention. But it was really just twice the love and twice the cuddles PLUS a new friend to play with... Yes there was a period of adjustment for everyone but now I can't ever imagine going back. By the way, you must be a VERY patient lady, because Jamie and Beau already drive me bonkers some days. Annoyed wouldn't even come close to describing the madness that is my house. (My boys are very vocal when wrestling and running and toy snatching.) __________________ Misty & Jamie

05-13-2010, 04:17 PM	#28
MyLilReese Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: May 2009 Location: Cantonment,FL, US Posts: 104 Blog Entries: 1	Viv it wasn't too long ago that I posted almost this very same post when I found out I was pregnant...and to this day I still worry about it sometimes! My baby is due in October and im excited for the baby to get here. It is mine and my husbands first child. But I admit I worry about Reese, cuz I love her to death. To me she was like my first child, cause as we all know yorkies are just like kids...lol. But I know with the help of my husband she will still get all the attention she needs and probably more! __________________ Reese's Mommy Proud member of Crazy Dog Ladies of YT

05-13-2010, 05:03 PM	#29
cathys Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: CA,USA Posts: 1,623	Don't worry so much about this, I have 5 skin babies and my furbaby is still important. My kids did take a lot of my time, but you just can't beat the fur kids for the unconditional love. They don't talk back, the don't know how to say no. They let you pick your TV shows. It changes things, but it works out. You'll be surprised how much your heart can grow, it's amazing. Life is what you makes of it and so is family.