I don't know if I can actually write this
 

This morning two of my labs got out of the fence. When I was going to work this morning they were running along side the truck, (we've been having problems with them getting out even though it's a chainlink fence with an electrical fence inside), well I didn't have time to fight with them to get them back in the fence. Anyway as I pulled out of my driveway they were on the side of me (usually they only go a few feet and go back home), another van was coming the opposite dirrection so I pulled over because I didn't want them to get in between us. Well I looked in the mirrors and saw one of them start to go home and I saw the other go around the back of my truck so I pulled back onto the road and had just started to touch the gas when.........oh God I can still see it, I ran over her! I looked back and just saw her roll! I turned around and went to her and she was already gone. I ran home and got my husband up screaming. If it was any other day I would have stayed home from work but we were having a big auction and I had to be there. When my husband got up to go get her, I left for work. It's a 20 minute drive and I still don't remember getting there. This guilt is killing me! I go from being numb to hysterical! I've lost animals before but NEVER by my own hand! I can't even go to her grave site yet!
I'm not looking for sympathy and I certainly can't handle any more guilt. I am hoping that by talking about it more it will help me at least get it out of my head.

wow... i don't know what to say... i am SO sorry for your loss... You must feel just awful... accidents happen but they are never supposed to be this horrible... i hope in time you are able to forgive yourself- it's what your pup would want you to do.

Thank you, I hope it will lessen each day but right now I'm so exhausted but I'm too afraid to close my eyes and see it all over again

Be very glad she didn't suffer.. i know you can't imagine any more pain than you are feeling but had it not been an instant death, i can't imagine that feeling. I know that doens't help with how you are feeling now. It's ok to feel guilty and to grieve, but look at the other faces of your other dogs and know you have to be there for them- as long as you are upset and sad- they will be too.

Sending you a HUGE hug...

I'm so so sorry that you experienced that. Accidents happen. I know you will feel guilty for a while...but eventually you'll start to forgive yourself and realize that it wasn't your fault and things just happen sometimes...devestating things. I'm so sorry. My prayers are with you and your family. I'm sending you a HUGE HUGE hug.

Oh hun! I am so sorry! It was an accident, and I hope someday you'll be able to see it that way. I'm just so sorry.

I ran over a stray kitten once in my driveway and it just about killed me. I can't even imagine a pet.

My heart goes out to you..I really do not think anyone needs to beat you up.. I think you are doing that to yourself right now..

Please try to forgive yourself first..then and only then will you be able to accept what happened to you..A mere tragedy that was an accident..I think you have to know god wanted the dog and needed that dog more then he thought you did ....

A very good friend of ours killed his own son. It was a tragic accident.. he was on his equipment for cutting logs.. and his 5 year old son following behind him on a 4 wheeler.. our friend could not see his son and turned around and on going up the hill... his son came over the hill and drove right into his dads equipment.. he died.. my friends have had a hard time dealing with this accident..but are still together and still have their youngest son that they cherish..

Accidents do happen..if you do not forgive yourself.. you will never move forward...

Hope this helps you ...

sending you puppy hugs.. anne

I am so very sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

I thank you all from my heart for helping me gain the strength to move forward. I don't know, maybe I was taking my pets love and life for granted and was not stopping long enough in my day to show them how much I love them.

I am so sorry. It must have been the most awful feeling. My thoughts are with you.

I'm so sorry. I ran over a puppy once. He was not mine, but it was an awful feeling inside. I got chills all over my body once I realized what had just happened. Just remember it was an accident. Please try to forgive yourself.

I am so sorry for your loss and the pain this is causing your heart. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I ran over a dog once and killed it. It was a strangers dog but I still feel guilty to this day. I know there was no way I could've stopped, he just ran right in front of me but I still can't help but feel bad. That happened probably about 20 years ago. I hope that you can forgive yourself and I'm so sorry again for your loss!

Accidents happen.. that is why they call them accidents...you didn't do it on purpose. I am so sorry this happened to you.. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

My husband's father did the same thing, but he did not see the dog at all. The dog was deft, and almost blind. He felt very guilty. It's being a year, and he still mention the insident

I am sorry. hugs to you.

I wish there were magic words to take away your pain, but, unfortunately, all I can offer is a big hug and the knowledge that it WAS an accident. In time, you will accept that and the guilt you feel now will start to lessen. In the meantime, use your babies to help your broken heart heal. Extra kisses is a good start. I am truely so sorry you had to experience such a tragedy. Take care and God Bless.

oh no ! I'm so sorry ....:(:(:(:(:(:(:( We all know how fast these things can happen and you can't beat yourself up over it...but that doesn't take away the hurt and guilt does it ? Even if you hadn't been in the car it could have happened....I hope you can get the image out of your head.

I'm so sorry

I am so sorry for your loss:( God bless you!

I feel so bad for you, I can imagine what you must be going through. But don't beat yourself up too much, it was an ACCIDENT and feeling guilty is not going to change anything. God bless.

I am so sorry for your loss. Please don't feel guilty about it, it was an accident. It was a blessing that he didn't have to suffer.

Hugs from Zoeybear and Baby Chloe.

so sorry for your loss. I ran over a neighbors dog last year. It ran out in front of me and I tried to swerve and stomped the brakes, but they are just so fast. It was an accident and yours was an accident too. Please try not to blame yourself. I liked what some one else on here said, God needed your dog with him now. Hugs to you, my thoughts are with you.

My heart is telling me she is being the lap dog she always wanted to be. I just wish she didn't have to go that way. I'm going to take a sleeping pill for tonight, I was able to get about 3 hours on and off last night.

Oh sweetie Im so sorry

I am so sorry for your loss. Hugs from me and Gracie. :bighug:

I am so truly sorry for your loss. I know nothing I could say could take away the pain and hurt you are feeling right now so I will just pray that you are able to greive, forgive yourself, and heal.

I am so sorry for your loss. :(

Accidents happen to all of us. My father ran over our family cocker spaniel many years ago because she took one of her puppies under the car with her. The puppy was nursing and she wouldn\'t move, we thought. She was not usually under the car. He ran over her and the five-week-old puppy. We had five puppies left in the litter and a country vet gave them worm medicine that killed all of them, so we lost the mother and all six of the puppies. We all do the best we can, but still accidents happen. I\'m so sorry for your loss.

:hug: I know you\'ve had a rough couple of days sweetie. I so hope everything gets better. Take care of yourself.