I am the winner today for sure Won the raffle prize i wanted so much last night And now have been going thru pictures for hours ( i won a drawing) It will be of my beloved Lexi Yep sure I am the winner today sorry all:):D

It is not often you are right........but........you are wrong again !!!!!!!!

Nope not wrong b......... I am winning. Those two words you do not like :):)

I win!

It seems to me that those two words you mention are only good for a moment or two so I wont use them I just post and enjoy the day but I am so happy for you that you so enjoy posting them....have a nice day (as they say is in USA).....:D:D:D;)

Attachment 349732 tee hee we win:D

I win

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"


(folks, you're gonna luv this)


The bank manager looks back at her and says...

"It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan, His old man's a Rolling Stone."


(You're singing it, aren't you? Yeah, I know you are........)


Never take life too seriously! Come on now, you grinned, I know you did!!!

Oh I did chuckle at that one dear thank you for my smile today.

;)************************************************ *****;)

A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.

The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.

The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.

Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.

Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.

To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.

The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"

The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a m

A redneck named Bubba died in a fire and was burned pretty badly and the morgue needed someone to identify the body.

So his two best friends, Daryl & Gomer, were sent for. Daryl went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. Daryl said, "Yup, he's burnt pretty bad. Roll him over."

So the mortician rolled him over and Daryl looked and said, "Nope, it ain't Bubba.

The mortician thought that was rather strange. Then he brought Gomer in to identify the body. Gomer took a look at him and said, "Yup, he's burnt real bad, roll him over."

The mortician rolled him over & Gomer looked down and said, "No, it ain't Bubba."

The mortician asked, "How can you tell?"

Gomer said, "Well, Bubba had two a**holes."

"What? He had two a**holes?" said the mortician.

"Yup, everyone knew about it too.

Every time we went to town, folks would say, "Here comes Bubba with 'dem two a**holes.'

Kfc coleslaw
 

KFC Coleslaw Recipe #1
Finger lickin goodness that YOU can make
Of course like any other copycat recipe, there are many different versions spread across the world. This is, by far, the most popular and widely accepted version of the KFC coleslaw recipe. Almost everyone uses and loves this recipe.

Ingredients:
8 cups shredded cabbage
1/4 cup carrot, shredded
1/3 cup sugar
1/2 teas. salt
1/8 teas. pepper
1/4 cup milk
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1/4 cup buttermilk
1 1/2 tbs. white vinegar
2 1/2 tbs. lemon juice

Method:
1. Combine cabbage and carrots in a large salad bowl.
2. Mix remaining dry ingredients together and combine thoroughly.
3. Pour liquid ingredients over cabbage and carrots and stir.
4. Refrigerate at least two hours before serving (overnight is better).
5. Stir well before serving.

Now I do like that one and will give it a shot. I am always on the lookout for recipes like this one.

When we have our BBQ's I like to make my own things like potato salad and shredded carrot. I am always complimented on both so this one will add to my BBQ skills.

Thank you

Attachment 349759

I plan to try it out this week. The reviews say to use tarragon vinegar instead of white vinegar but I'm not sure it will make much of a flavor difference.

Thank you...... Ready set go

One day at the end of class little Johnny's teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then conclude the moral of that story. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story, little Suzy raises her hand.

"My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road."

The teacher asks for the moral of the story. Suzy replies, "Don't keep all your eggs in one basket."

Next is little Lucy. "Well my dad owns a farm too and every weekend we take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only 8 of the 12 eggs hatched."

The teacher asks for the moral of the story. Lucy replies "Don't count your eggs before they're hatched."

Last is little Johnny. "My uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war; his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. On the way down he drank the case of beer. Unfortunately, he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. The blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands".

Teacher looks in shock at Johnny and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story.

Johnny replies, "Don't mess with uncle Ted when he's been drinking!"

household Tips:
Stubborn stains can be removed from non-stick
cookware by boiling, 2 tablespoons of baking soda, 1/2 cup vinegar,
and 1 cup of water for ten minutes. Before using the pan again,
season it with salad oil.

Burnt food can be removed from a glass baking
dish by spraying it with oven cleaner and letting it soak for
30 minutes. The burnt-on residue will be easier to wipe off.

Whenever you empty a jar of dill pickles,
use the left-over juice to clean the copper bottoms of your pans.
Just pour the juice in a large bowl, set the pan in the juice
for about 15 minutes. Comes out looking like new.

To restore color and shine to an aluminum pan, boil some apple peels
in it for a few minutes, then rinse and dry.

Instead of using expensive silver cleaners, put a dab of toothpaste
on a clean rag and rub it on your precious possession. After you've
rubbed it in, just clean it with another clean rag.
Your silver will look like new.

To clean copper bottoms on pots and pans, simply open a can of tomato
soup paste, rub it on and scrub then rinse. If you do this weekly,
your pots and pans stay shiny clean. This is a very inexpensive
way to clean copper and brass items!

Stains and sediment in cut glass or hobnob bowls or vases respond
to olive oil. Pour some in and let stand until the stains or
sediment disappear.

Clean eyeglasses; Wipe each lens with a drop of vinegar.

When preparing lunches for your children (or anyone), try "drinkable" ice packs: Fill a 12-ounce plastic bottle about halfway with drinking water and freeze it
overnight, tilting the bottle so the water will freeze at an angle (if you freeze it straight up, the expanded water will make the bottle bulge). Next morning pack the lunch, add more drinking water to the bottle, and stick it in the lunch box to keep the food cool and be melted enough to drink by lunchtime.
(back to top of page)

Since we have managed to pull away (well almost) from those two words I have read some very interesting posts and also learned a few things as well.
I know it takes a little effort to do interesting posts but if we cant make the effort then we should not bore the pants off people either.

This thread can live a long time yet with the OP heading for the longest thread in history...lol

I really do hope we can all keep posting interesting little snippets it keeps us smiling.

:thumbup::thumbup::D:D

Ingredient Substitution List

Ingredient substitutions to substitute cooking ingredients for your recipes

• 1 teaspoon baking powder = ¼ teaspoon baking soda plus ½ cup buttermilk or ¼ teaspoon baking soda plus 5/8 teaspoon cream of tartar

• 1 cup sifted cake flour = 7/8 cup sifted all-purpose flour or 1 cup all-purpose flour minus 1-2 tablespoons

• 1 cup self-rising flour = 1 cup sifted all-purpose flour plus 1½ teaspoons baking powder and ½ teaspoon salt

• 1 cup all-purpose flour = 1 cup whole wheat flour

• 1 cup honey = 1 to 1¼ cups sugar plus ¼ cup liquid

• 2 large eggs = 3 small eggs

• 1 medium egg = 2 egg yolks plus 1 tablespoon water (for baking)

• 1 medium egg = 2 egg yolks (in custards or cream fillings)

• 1 ounce unsweetened chocolate = 1 square or 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder plus 1 tablespoon butter or margarine

A man goes to Frederick's of Hollywood. He wants to buy his wife the most sheer lingerie he can find. The woman behind the counter goes and gets an outfit.
"This is $200," she says.
"I want one that's more sheer," says he.

"This one is $350."
"I want it even more sheer than that."

"This one is the most sheer that we have. It's $500."
"I'll take it!"

The man goes home to his wife and shows it to her, saying, "Go put this on and come down to model it for me."

His wife goes upstairs, opens the box and thinks, "This thing is so see through that the old coot won't even notice if I'm wearing it or not."

So his wife comes down, wearing nothing at all and strikes a pose.
"So, how do you like it?" she says.

"Damn, you'd think for $500, they'd at least iron the damn thing!"

1891 is when the first tanning bed was developed by Kellogg from the cereal company.

Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins

mate for life, as well as maintaining a form ofcompassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.

If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into and buried. The male penguins then gather in a circlearound the fresh grave and sing:






"Freeze a jolly good fellow"

"Freeze a jolly good fellow."


"Then they kick him in the ice hole."


You really didn't believe that I know anything about penguins, did you?
It's so easy to fool OLD people.
I am sorry, the devil made me do it!!!
I fell for it too.

Peshtigo Fire (Peshtigo Wisconsin), the deadliest fire in US history, it happened on the same night as the great Chicago fire. 1,200 – 2,500 people were killed in the Peshtigo fire and it destroyed 1,300,000 acres of forests.

Hmmmmmmmmmmm....are you suggesting that I was fooled then huh...........

Well you will have to try harder than that to fool this old guy I can tell you because I know that Penguins recite that not sing it and they do it just after they say prayers so there....no fool me....:D;):):p

The term “blue blood” comes from spanish, and refers to clear porcelain skin that allows you to see the veins underneath.

How can my wife be so cruel to me huh ???

While reading a newspaper, I came across an article about a beautiful actress and model who married a boxer who was noted for his IQ.

"I'll never understand," I said to my wife Joan, "why the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives."

Joan replied, "Why, thank you, dear."

Armadillos, opossums, and sloth's spend about 80% of their lives sleeping.