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Baby stuff- starting to freak out! Okay Im about to hit my third trimester and I am freaking out about our finacial situation as reality is starting to sink in and having a baby, etc etc. So I need sort of a pep talk and you all need to tell me everything is going to be fine, lol :p Im just freaking out because Im trying to maintain paying regular bills getting caught up on debt and also plan for our baby girls arrival in just 3 months and Im trying to start purchasing baby stuff. Being that we didnt plan this pregnancy(although this is the greatest thing to ever happen to me) I really do not feel we are financially ready for a baby as everyone says how expensive they are and now its really starting to hit me and we had no money really saved up for anything like this and this is just huge, so this is why Im startign to go into panic mode. Im trying hard to do everything economically, to save on cost me and my mom have been making all the baby room decor bedding, etc. and Ive been hitting craig's list and ebay to find stuff. And I know we will have 2 different baby showers too so that will help. Question is, how soon do I need to buy everything? If it were up to my husband he'd put it off until the very last week :rolleyes: He thinks since we still have 3 months left that I am nuts for buying a crib last week but it made me feel better having the major furniture purchase already out of the way. I dont know, is this just my hormones freaking me out or is reality sinking in? For those who have had kids what all do I HAVE to have and what can I live without and what all do I need to definetly have when the baby comes? I know I dont need some stuff yet until they are older like highchairs. It just makes me so nervous becasue I really dont klnwo what all I need to save money for to buy until after the baby showers next month and im so nervous waiting until the last minute to purchase everythign else that we still need. This is so nervewracking! Need pep talk. Thanks! |
Don't freak out, truth is if we all waited until we were financially fit we would never have kids. There is always something. Its like a vicious cycle. The amazing part is that everything always seems to fall into place and work out just fine. Wait until you have both of your baby showers and see what you get and then go from there. You might find that you get double of things that you can bring back and use the $ for something you really need or want. When I had my first child 8 yrs ago I was just like you freaking out about $ and all turned out just fine. Good luck! |
Having been there twice, I can promise you that it will work out. Things will fall into place just perfectly, you'll see. Just try to relax and enjoy your pregnancy. You'll get most of what you need from your shower and there are so many things that you might want but will hardly use at all. For instance, my portable playpen is still like new after 2 kids. I don't think I used it more than a dozen times between the 2 of them. You need a crib, which you have. You'll need diapers and bottles and clothes but you'll get more than enough of those at your shower I'm sure. You absolutely must have a car seat and probably a stroller but really beyond that, I can't think of anything else that you absolutely have to have. So try not to stress and just enjoy thinking about your new little girl growing inside your belly because the time will go by so quickly and things will work out perfectly. :) |
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Did I mention in my first thread that I have never changed a diaper in my whole life? Ive never fed a baby or anything, yikes!!!!! I think Ive only held a baby like twice and thats becasue my friend made me. I have so much to learn and prepare for!!! |
I've had three kids, and things will work out just fine so don't worry! I would wait until after the showers to see what you will need to buy. Relax!!:) |
I wouldn't buy a thing until after the showers! And register for everything!!!!!!!!! Including lots of diapers!!!!!!! It will all work out! I don't think anyone is ever truly ready for a baby, but everyone seems to get by just fine! So the best thing you can do, is try to be stress free, and calm down! You have to take care of yourself and that little one inside you! Have lots of faith!!!!!!!!!! |
Relax!!! Most of us aren't ready financially. Some how it all works out. Just don't go overboard on baby things as they outgrow everything so fast. If you can get hand me down swings, playpens etc that helps. You will also find you don't spend as much on yourselves once you have kids, you want to spend it on them. My dtr came 5 weeks early and we weren't prepared. The room needed to be painted and the crib put together. So while I was in the hospital my husband and his friend painted the room. WHen it came time to bring her home I told him to bring an outfit for her since I hadn't packed anything yet. So he brings a mickey mouse tshirt my sister got her in Disneyland that was for a 24 month old. SHe weighed 5 lbs!!!lol So try not to stress it all works out and keep your sense of humor!!! |
Shana, the very first thing that you need to do is.....just relax. The only thing that she will need when she comes home is a place to sleep, to be cuddled and comforted, to be fed, kept clean & kept warm. That's it. You will have enough $$ to take care of her. Trust me, it'll work out. I know that your baby is blessed to have you as her mommy. All you really need for the first couple of weeks is lots of diapers and wipes, sleepers & milk. An ice bag for you, a quiet place for the 3 of you to sit and cuddle & sleep whenever you can. |
Ditto what they said!! Just relax and enjoy it. Everything will be fine! You will probably get everything you need at your two showers. After that it will just be gradually that you need more things, nothing major. You will be an amazing MOM!! |
You'll be fine, Shana. When they're newborns, they can sleep just about anywhere. WE never actually used our crib for a long time. Plus lots of baby stuff can be got at yard sales and stuff for cheap. You'll probably do well at the shower too! Don't know if you're planning to bottle or breast feed, but breastfeeding is FREE! :) |
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Relax......enjoy your pregnancy. Everything will work out just fine. I've done it 5 times and things always seem to fall in place. You got alot of good advice on the main things you'll need and also about waiting until after your showers to see if there's anything that you absolutely need. Most will be given to you at your showers and then you will just have to add things slowly. Once you master changing a diaper, which won't take long, you'll be able to do it with your eyes closed ;) |
I agree with everyone!! Also, there should be plenty of baby consignment stores that sell furniture really reasonable.....shoot, they are only used what a few months?? You will be okay, it will all be okay.....everything will fall into place! Don't worry at all! Never changed a diaper huh? I think that just comes naturally once that baby is there....like so much other stuff. I think there use to be classes you could take - not just lamaze, but a prep class on just about everything, including CPR...that might be something to check into in your area. |
As everyone else said, you will be fine! You will be amazed at the things you get at your baby showers will keep you stocked through their 1st and maybe even 2nd birthdays. But just remember this. Babies only NEED two things...food and diapers Hopefully you can provide the food free of charge. And for the diapers...I had a themed baby shower for my second son, where we asked people to bring baby care items, such as diapers/wipes/and other such things. I was stocked for a loooong time.:D I hope you're feeling well! |
And Shana, they won't let you leave the hospital until you show them that you can feed and change a diaper. That they do make you do :p And believe me they SHOW YOU how to do EVERYTHING...Even breast feed :rolleyes: don't be suprised at their disregard of privacy. LOL |
The baby showers will help sooo much! And you're having 2?? That's great! I wish you the best! Do not worry, i know you will be ready and be the best mom! |
I too agree with all that has been said. It will all fall into place! I was 17 when I had my daughter and I didnt know how to care for a baby, 90% came naturally! the other 10% was the nurses lol. They do help you. As far as what you need for her, im almost 100% sure that with 2 baby showers you will get what you need and more:) I had one shower and didnt have to buy diapers for like 4 months! Its always scary when you sit and think about being a mommy, ths little person depending on you...that is scary BUT you will do great! I understand how you feel about the finacial aspect of it as well. Like i said I had my oldest when i 17, then my son at 22 my husband was the only income and I was so scared but we made it and you will too! Then I found out that I was pregnant again when my son was only 6 months old wanna talk about stressed lol but we did it and we are fine :-) and u will be too!!! |
I remember these same feelings - I was going from working fulltime to being off for 3 months. I honestly don't know how we did it, but it all worked out fine! I went back to work parttime, and again, I don't know how we did without my fulltime salary, but we did just fine. My daughter just had a baby and she shops regularly at the consignment stores. You can usually find clothes with the tags still on. As for playpens, toys, strollers etc. they are dirt cheap at the consignment stores. Also, watch for sales at the regular stores. For example, Carter's baby store regularly has 1/2 price sales - EVERYTHING in the store is 1/2 price. It will be fine - don't worry!!! :) |
Hi Shana, like others said, I wouldn't buy much before the showers, because you don't know what you're gonna get. Babies actually don't need that much other than formula, diapers, and clothes. Of course you'll need a crib but the rest you'll see as times goes by, and you'll find that you maybe purchased things that you don't need. Like a lot of people get the diaper changer table, but they end up using the queen bed because there is more space and it's more comfy. Or you get a swing and she doesn't like it. You go to places like babies'r us and they have soooo much stuff, but you don't need all that! I know the place is awesome, but it's pricey and everything gets into your eyes and then your wallet! After going there for a friends shower, I decided I don't want to go there when I have a baby because I'm gonna end up in debt!!! If you'll get two baby showers, ask for gift cards, those are good to save after the baby is born so you get what you need then. Maybe you get at the shower tons of clothes for 0-3 months, but when the baby is 7 months you don't have anything, so you have the gift cards to get clothes or even diapers or formula. Well, I'm sure that if you sew dog clothes you can make wondeful baby attire anyway!!!! :) |
2 Attachment(s) Did I mention in my first thread that I have never changed a diaper in my whole life? Ive never fed a baby or anything, yikes!!!!! I think Ive only held a baby like twice and thats becasue my friend made me. I have so much to learn and prepare for!!![/QUOTE] My daughter had never changed a diaper til she gave birth to my granddaughter. You will do just fine. Our granddaughter was a pleasant surprise too. Do not stress over the financial aspect. Rarely is any one financially ready to have kids. The things Holly used most for Brooklyn were: a bassinet, baby swing, bottles, diapers, baby monitor, infant seat and stroller. The rest she started using later. BTW Brooklyn is now 10 months. You are going to do great.... Oh Yeah...When Holly had Brooklyn, we brought home two hospital blankets that Brooklyn was wrapped in so that Holly's yorkie, Maddie, could smell it and get use to. That was a big help. Maddie thought Brooklyn belonged to her...lol |
Do not stress over this, you'll do fine! I think that it is normal for first time mommies to get like this right before the final months, I sure did, then I ended up with 4 boy's in 5 years!!Only 2 were planed,#1and#3, the other 2 were nice surprises! I would hold off with buying things till after those baby showers. I got every thing and then some from mine! I registerd at a few places and boy oh boy did I get things! I did not have to by bath supplies for a year! not to mention all the little outfits that I got. If you are worried about not knowing how to chang a diaper, see if your hospital or Birthing center offers classes for first time parents. |
I was feeling exactly what you are a year ago from now. Everything worked out GREAT! Everyone kept telling me if you wait till you can afford a baby then you would never have one. Babies are expensive, but on a tight budget, hubby and I did just fine. To avoid getting things I didn't really need I made a wish list for my baby showers. I put up top Baby C's Wish List and the shower host sent them in the invitations. It didn't sound so demanding and they didn't feel pressured to buy those items. We had most of our larger items and just needed diapers, blankets, etc. I was so glad people bought us tons and tons of diapers! We went through those like crazy. One mistake hubby and I made was we didn't buy hardly any actual newborn sized clothes. Although they don't stay that size very long, the outfit we packed for the hospital swallowed my son up. We only had 0-3 months. On all of our big things we went the cheaper route. We bought the changing table and dresser out of the newspaper, my in-laws bought the crib, and my mom bought the bassinet. My son hated his crib and he didn't like his bassinet for very long. The bassinet was nice to have to bring him home to. He just seemed to small for his crib at first, so I'd buy a bassinet before a crib, but that's just my opinion. My aunt had just had a baby boy so we got a lot of my cousin's clothes he outgrew. They don't stay in the same size for very long but my weakness was still buying him tons of clothes. I'd hit the malls on sale days and even check out Wal-Mart. I was so suprised how much money I made back on my baby clothes he outgrew. They were like brand new. Try not to stress out to much. Everything will be just fine. :) |
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Ok I don't have kids, but I watched my best friend and her boyfriend have a baby and they had NOTHING... not married, both still lived at home with thier parents (they were 26) and she made $10/hr at her job and he couldn't keep a job. I was soooo worried for them. At the time I was moving from my apt, and buying a house with my boyfriend, so we gave them our apt so they could move in. We left them the security deposit bc they would NEVER come up with $800 for a security deposit on their own... but their boy is now 4 years old almost and they made it work, they provided for him and got almost everything they needed at their babyshower... you will more than likely get a highchair, a carseat or two, etc... make sure you register for it. Until the babyshower next month, don't buy another baby thing! Just put the $$ you were going to spend aside and let it grow interest in a bank account until you see what you get. Also Im sure that you know people with kids who will give you hand me down clothes and other stuff as their children grow out of them. I mean my friend got a carseat from another friend whos baby outgrew it... Im sure it will all work out just perfect :) |
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Most people I know have deallt with babies at some point in their lives but somehow I never seemed to be around little babies in my family so I missed all that. All my cousins were older and no one I knew was ever having children until now and since Ive gone 26 years without changing diapers and holding babies Im too afraid to hold someone elses. So it really helps to hear someone elses experience that has gone through what Im about to go through. Thank you for sharing :hug: |
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5 times! Wow, that is awesome! I cant imagine even doing this once yet, lol :p |
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Im so excited and feel so lucky we are having 2 showers. My friends are giving me a shower and then my husbands work is throwing a shower next month and the people at my husbands work are just absolutely wonderful, so I knwo we will get a lot of the stuff we need from these 2 showers and I feel very fortunate for this. |
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Do not stress over the financial aspect. Rarely is any one financially ready to have kids. The things Holly used most for Brooklyn were: a bassinet, baby swing, bottles, diapers, baby monitor, infant seat and stroller. The rest she started using later. BTW Brooklyn is now 10 months. You are going to do great.... Oh Yeah...When Holly had Brooklyn, we brought home two hospital blankets that Brooklyn was wrapped in so that Holly's yorkie, Maddie, could smell it and get use to. That was a big help. Maddie thought Brooklyn belonged to her...lol[/QUOTE] She is beautifull! Thanks for sharing those pictures. I hope Chloe gets along well with Tess like Maddie is with Brooklyn in those pics. Did it take awhile for Maddie to warm up to her? Im terribly afraid Chloe is going to be super upset and jealous since she is used to getting all the attention. |
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