Got a good joke?? I need a laugh!
 

I'm having a tough week! And a good friend send me a couple of jokes, thanks Whitney, that really brightened my day! Since we have a couple of younder members... I wont post my FAVORITE!!!;) But here is one that another friend sent me this morning:


God & the Blonde

A blonde was driving down the street, in a panic
Because she had an important meeting and couldn't
Find a parking space.
Looking up toward heaven, she said, "Oh Lord, please
Take pity on me. If you find me a parking space, I
Will go to church every Sunday for the rest of my
Life and give up sex and tequila."
Miraculously, an empty parking spot appeared.
She looked up again and said, "Never mind, found one!"


Now I know you guys have a few news one for me... Lets here um! I need some new laughs!



k

aww great joke heres one for you mind...

Blonde walking into a pawn shop and asks the man how much his TV was...
The man said 'Sorry we Dont serve blondes'
She comes in the next day and says...
'how much for that TV?'
The man said sorry we dont serve blondes...
The next day she walked in with ginger hair and asked...
'how much for that TV?'
The man said sorry we dont serve blondes...
She asked him, 'how do you know im blonde?'
The man replied saying, " Because that so called TV is a microwave oven"

Whats the difference between boogers and broccoli??

How do you make a tissue dance??

dont know to both of em?>

I just realized both of my jokes were about boogers! haha :)

ahh i see the old classics there always the best

A woman driving down a country road, when a rabbit runs out & she hits it.
Stopping she gets out realizing what had happened, begins to cry.
Just then a farmer comes out of a near by barn, hearing the woman crying begins to approach her.
"Whats wrong" says the farmer
"I just run over a little bunny rabbit & killed it" replies the lady
"Wait a minute, I might have something that might help" replies the farmer.
With this he goes into his barn and come out with a spay can. He then proceeds to spray the bunny.
Just then the bunny gets up and runs up the hill. He the turns around & waves. Goes a little farther & turns around & waves. Gets up to the top & turns around & waves.
"What was that you sprayed on the bunny?" the woman replied.
"Hair restorer with permanent wave" replied the farmer.

that joke sux lol... i dont understand...

Hair or Hare restorer! LOL

7 DEGREES OF BLONDE

FIRST DEGREE
A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.The
very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment and said "How
should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up. The husband
said, "Who was that?" The wife answered, "I don't know, some woman
wanting to know if the coast is clear."

SECOND DEGREE
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the
sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror
and says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar." The second blonde says,
"Here, let me see!" So the first blonde hands her the compact. The
second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"

THIRD DEGREE
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and
buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens
the
door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really
angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she
is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head. The
boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!" The blonde replies, "Shut
up, you're next!"

FOURTH DEGREE
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly
says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them." A friend says, "OK, what's
the capital of Wisconsin ?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."

FIFTH DEGREE
What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
"Is it mine?"

SIXTH DEGREE
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US
government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs.
Wade was about. Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was
the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the
Delaware"

SEVENTH DEGREE
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house
ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and
reported the crime.
The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit,
patrolling nearby, was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer
approached
the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch,
shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the
steps.
Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my
possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do?
They send me a BLIND policeman."


Everyone sends me blonde jokes I guess because I'm blonde
or they think I this dumb too:confused:

Carol!!!! That was the best yet!!! A BLIND POLICE MAN!!! I'm going to be laughing for weeks about that one!!!! LOLOLOLOL

very good.. i loved all of them...thanks i needed that

Too funny!!! Thanks for the laughs!

Blonde Joke
 

Why did the Blonde name her Yorkies Rolex & Timex??

She wanted them to be "watch dogs"

yuk yuk :wink: :wink:

:eyetearss That's good! I love it!