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Not ready,MrJ died and husband wants to go looking at puppies. I'm so pissed and hurt and not sure what esle. I told him it's too soon. I mean I've not even got J's ashes back and he freakin wants to go puppy shopping. I want to slap him. I know it's grief and nomral. Tell me I'm not wrong. TyTy |
Neither of you is wrong...for some getting a new pup is a good idea and for others its not a good idea...we got another dog very quickly after my beloved Moocho was killed last Christmas...probably not the smartest thing in the world but we were hurting so bad and a new pup made things a little softer and managable....My best friend is still grieving two years later for her Chi and nothing can make her get another...she wont deal with the pain ever again which in itself is sad as she is a great dog mommy.. Dawn |
I symphathise with you i would feel the same but my hubby too thinks its best to get another real quick. You will know when the times right for you but im sure this is just your hubbys way of coping. |
No I think its too soon too. Your pup just passed away. You need time to heal. In your Husbands defense I have seen people on go right out and get a pu after theirs passed. Everyone deals with grief differently. I wuld just tell him its too soon for you |
Your not wrong and he is not wrong.... you may not want to get one now and he may be feeling a need to fill a great void. You both need to support eachother. Maybe try going with him, and "just look." Put your foot down and insist that you two meet half way on the issue... that you can't bring a new baby home right now, but that you'll look with him... maybe by you both giving a little you can see where eachother are coming from. And then you won't both be angry, which is normal, but can help each other work through it. Who knows visiting puppies may help, him or you decide what the next move is... he may get there and have major cold feet and feel serious remorse? Just support him as you would want to be supported and ask the same of him. Weather or not that will work??? Well thats another story. But you two need each other support right now. |
Aww, this is such a hard thing. Everyone feels differently. I'm just so sorry for your loss, it's heartbreaking. After each of mine has passed I have never reacted the same. With Fritz, I was out that week looking for a pup, with Shelby I waited a few years...it's so hard to know how you'll react. He's not disrespecting your little one that just passed, he's just trying to fill the huge hole left behind. Perhaps if you remind your husband that if you wait one of you can research breeders, etc., and be sure you are getting the healthiest pup available...might help. Good luck to you and you are in my thoughts and prayers! |
What makes me madder is that same breeder He wants to go back to that mill, we got him from. and get another puppy. she specializes in poo/yorkie/chi mixes. with the same three studs. or Petland let's not go there. Tyty |
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have you tried to talk to your husband about why you don't want to get another puppy right now, especially from petland or the mill you got Mr j from? that is definately not a good idea IMO. why dont you tell him that you want another puppy but this next one will come from a good breeder. This will make the search for another puppy a little longer and give you some greiving time. |
yes to some degree. Quote:
I'm not real sure. I was pretty much in shock. but what it is he had a like open skull with parts of bone growing downward. I'm talking to him mostly. {the husband} he's spoke to that Mill on the phone yesterday while I was at the Vet making arrangments. and she's offerin a pick puppy of anything she's got. grr and she's got 5 litters to pick from. :rolleyes: :mad: tyty |
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I feel so bad for you - I know you haven't recovered from losing your puppy yet :( |
Neither of you is wrong, everyone deals with a loss in his/her own way. I could not think of a new puppy for 18 months after we lost ours, even then, when we picked her up, i felt kind of guilty. A lot of people/friends, and family, assured me that i was doing the right thing. |
People grieve in different ways. I understand how you feel -- after I lost my first Yorkie, Laciebug, it took me almost 10 years before I was ready..... Now I wish I hadn\'t waited so long, so many Yorkieless days and nights. Maybe your hubby is really hurting and needs to fill up the hole in his heart with puppy kisses. If he insists on "puppy shopping", maybe you can bury your grief in research and steer him in the right direction towards a good healthy pups. hugs to you both :ghug: |
everyone does things different we went and got kayko a week after pepper died it helped alot for us please dont go back to the same place or petland go to a good breeder otherwise expect a unhealthy dog |
I don\'t see a thing wrong in giving another little one a loving home. |
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