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amyd 10-12-2006 10:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chloeTG
and another thing....no one and I mean no one...regardless of age has the right to speak to someone in an inappropriate manner....despite popular belief we're all humans and deserve the simple courtesy of polite demeanor. That is what's wrong with this society, everyone has a HUGE chip on their shoulder...and I'm not saying the younger generation doesn't either...but there are a few things that well I guess the younger generation could change too..inclluding our working environments!


preach on sister! Where did Jeanie go?:rolleyes:

vainchick5 10-12-2006 10:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chloeTG
and another thing....no one and I mean no one...regardless of age has the right to speak to someone in an inappropriate manner....despite popular belief we're all humans and deserve the simple courtesy of polite demeanor. That is what's wrong with this society, everyone has a HUGE chip on their shoulder...and I'm not saying the younger generation doesn't either...but there are a few things that well I guess the younger generation could change too..inclluding our working environments!

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I totally understand what you are going through. I'm 26 and already have my masters degree and it makes those who don't have as much education insecure, and the only way insecure people feel better is by bashing other peoples accomplishments and know-hows. While it is good to listen and learn from those that are more experienced, it does not give them the right to speak to you in a disrespectful and unprofessional manner. Way to go on your education honey and you definetely paid your dues in school. Now we just have to pay our dues in the work place. Don't let those who are jealous of your education and success pull you down. They only do it to make themselves feel better for not having your accomplishments. Anyone can get a job, but only a special select few have the smarts and ability to go and actually complete college (I'm not talking financially either because anyone can get a student loan. I'm still paying mine..lol)

Peters 10-12-2006 12:58 PM

honestly why do you care what they think ? ignore them you have nothing to prove

RLC12345678 10-12-2006 01:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Peters
honestly why do you care what they think ? ignore them you have nothing to prove

I completely agree! I'm 23 but look like I'm about 15 so obviously no one really takes ME seriously! But I don't really care. I just smile and then prove them wrong. ;)

doortego 10-12-2006 02:53 PM

Bridging the Generation Gap with kindness.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by chloeTG
I am so sick of being treated like a child! I'm 25 years old and have held a steady job since graduating college!! Why is it that these old ninny's treat us younger women like dirt!! I have a bachelor's degree in Marketing and feel like that has earned me some respect among others in the office, yet all these women treat me like I am 12 and have no idea what I'm doing...they pick me apart from head to toe, what I'm wearing, how I do my job...it's everywhere I go to...will this ever get better, will the younger generation who have worked hard ever be treated like normal human beings...sorry so long but I had to vent, I'm totally tired of no matter where I work getting the run down from these fat old women!! Where are all the cool chicks and why don't I ever work with anyone who just likes to shoot the @#$ and have fun...AHH I'm working for men from now on...


Seems like YT has a generation gap going on. I thought I'd try to hit the middle ground since a lot of us "fat old women" would like to be respected too and not lumped into a category any more than the "cool chicks". I have to say that I believe respect is something that is earned and in a work environment, that respect will probably have to be earned "on the job". Lots of us "fat old women" went to college too even if it was a long time ago. Anyway, best of luck to you in your career. :)

mylittletigger 10-12-2006 03:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JeanieK
When you have paid your dues you'll be treatred like an equal. meanwhile keep you eyes and ears open and your mouth shut and you might learn something.

Education is great but the real world is where you learn things.

Educatioin does not automatically = intelligence.

Education + wisdom = intelligence

Wisdom comes from living

There are as lot of edccated dummies that could not hold a candle to someone who got their education on the job.

I'm not trying to be abrasive at all... but what's with the rude comments? :mad:

Everybody deserves respect regardless of age, color of skin, or anything. Education is important but everybody deserves respect.

red98vett 10-12-2006 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by doortego
Seems like YT has a generation gap going on. I thought I'd try to hit the middle ground since a lot of us "fat old women" would like to be respected too and not lumped into a category any more than the "cool chicks". I have to say that I believe respect is something that is earned and in a work environment, that respect will probably have to be earned "on the job". Lots of us "fat old women" went to college too even if it was a long time ago. Anyway, best of luck to you in your career. :)

awww...I wondered if someone would feel that sting...

I think in general - women can be hard to work with - young AND older - I had my share of that kind of thing .....most men don't care how another man dresses etc ....but women sure pay attention to those little details - it's just the way it is.

I've had great friends at work (women) and I've seen the cattiness too - it happens - you just have to ignore it and do your best - Easy to say - hard to do - but ONE DAY....all of us will be one of those 'old women' and who says we can't be cool too ? I haven't lost mine yet I HOPE !

GucciMyGirl 10-12-2006 04:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by red98vett
awww...I wondered if someone would feel that sting...

I think in general - women can be hard to work with - young AND older - I had my share of that kind of thing .....most men don't care how another man dresses etc ....but women sure pay attention to those little details - it's just the way it is.

I've had great friends at work (women) and I've seen the cattiness too - it happens - you just have to ignore it and do your best - Easy to say - hard to do - but ONE DAY....all of us will be one of those 'old women' and who says we can't be cool too ? I haven't lost mine yet I HOPE !


I agree 100 percent with Vilette, women in general are hard to work with. I am speaking from past and present experience. Age and phycial size has nothing to do with it!! If you want to be respected on the job you do have to ignore it and show them that cattiness does not bother you, or go to work with men they are much easier to get along with. Remember those old fat women were once young, skinny and intelligent to.. so you should choose your words more wisely. As V said we can be cool to, and I along with V havent lost mine yet either....lol

JeanieK 10-12-2006 04:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mylittletigger
I'm not trying to be abrasive at all... but what's with the rude comments? :mad:

Everybody deserves respect regardless of age, color of skin, or anything. Education is important but everybody deserves respect.


The comment wasn't rude, it's advice my dad gave me years ago and I've found it to be very helpful over the years.

Not meant to be rude, just meant to be informational.

Look at it this way. All of the older people have been where you are, you've never been where they are.

In this country there is an overwhelming tendency to disregard older people. In the asian countries, the elderly are highly respected, their wisdom is cherished and sought after by young people. And which culture has the more intelligent people???????????????

Think about it before you just disregard it because some older person said it.

I knew that comment would get some raised eyebrows.

Keep your eyes ad ears on and your mouth shut, you might learn something.

The best advice my father ever gave me. He had a 7th grade education. I have a bachelors degree, and I wish he was still here so I could learn more from him. He was uneducated, but very intelligent.

JeanieK 10-12-2006 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chloeTG
While I respect your opinion, I have done nothing to deserve any of these comments if nothing else I hide in my cubicle and cry!! While I understand some might not have a college education that wasn't available to them back then...I also can express how devastating this can be to someone who is trying so hard to just simply fit in! You older gals could learn a few things from the younger kids too again all I see here is a judgement call because I am younger. 5 years of college is my due honey! My credit cards and student loans can tell you that story. I do appreciate others who are more supportive and have just simply allowed me to do what everyone else on YT does vent a little.


Oh you poor thing,. You have sio much to learn.

JeanieK 10-12-2006 05:07 PM

LOL

I know it's not funny. But you yonung girls have got to remember, We have all been YOU. You have never been US. But with a lot of luck you'll get there.

And yes maybe we do feel a little threatened. Not because we feel that you are better educated, or more qualified, but we know how our society works.

Your time is coming. as Judge Judy is fond of saying. Beauty fades. Dumb is forever. Try not top be dumb, cause your youth won't carry you forever.

The most loving, caring advice I can give you.

"Keep your eyes and ears open and your mouth shut and you might learn something".

That says it all.

I've given the same advice to all 5 of my lovely intelligent young daughters. I love them dearly, I feel sorry for all they have yet to learn.

Real life does not come from a book.

JeanieK 10-12-2006 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GucciMyGirl
I agree 100 percent with Vilette, women in general are hard to work with. I am speaking from past and present experience. Age and phycial size has nothing to do with it!! If you want to be respected on the job you do have to ignore it and show them that cattiness does not bother you, or go to work with men they are much easier to get along with. Remember those old fat women were once young, skinny and intelligent to.. so you should choose your words more wisely. As V said we can be cool to, and I along with V havent lost mine yet either....lol


Me either. I can be very cool. My daughters love to hang out with me. Maybe they just love to make fun of me. But I'm the one they call for advice.

Tophersmom 10-12-2006 08:19 PM

Sorry this is so long...I have verbal diarreah tonight, I think!

I may be <ahem> big boned and I guess I could be considered 'old' (to some...I'm 45) ...oh, and according to my 17 year old daughter and 13 year old son, I'm cool....lol...the best compliment I ever got from my kids..hehe! I have a university education and had to pay my dues in life.

When I was 26 years old (I believe it was just yesterday), I had a staff of about 30 that I managed...many older than I (I was in the airline business)...and it was very difficult in the beginning. And it's true, women can be more difficult to work with than men, but it sure wasn't easy being boss to a few men almost twice my age when I was 26, either. Many nights I cried but I kept on plugging along in a strange city where I knew no one, and did the best damn job that I could do.

I took some advice from my dad and made sure that I let the older staff know that I understood that it couldn't be easy having to be managed by someone my age...especially since they were in the business longer than I was on the planet. I approached these people and asked them if I could learn from them, cause they had an education that I didn't and that education was gained by working on the front lines of the business...not in school.

In the end, my staff took me under their wing...they taught me so much and I earned their respect. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

******
I never liked to assume that when someone dislikes me (whether openly or quietly) that it's due to jealousy. There could be a myriad of reasons as to why an individual would feel that way toward me...rightly or wrongly.

I'm not saying that the actions by the ladies in your office should be defended...not at all...but office politics can be sticky. There are many ways to handle the situation...90% of them would not make your working conditons any better.

I do agree with Villette...one day you may be that old (fat) gal in the office who's looked upon the same way by a young newcomer. Time flies.

Good luck to you!

Bruce's_Mom 10-12-2006 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JeanieK
When you have paid your dues you'll be treatred like an equal. meanwhile keep you eyes and ears open and your mouth shut and you might learn something.

Education is great but the real world is where you learn things.

Educatioin does not automatically = intelligence.

Education + wisdom = intelligence

Wisdom comes from living

There are as lot of edccated dummies that could not hold a candle to someone who got their education on the job.

Now I feel this to some extent. However, in my capacity as a law clerk I have encountered a number of legal secretaries that treat me like I am 5 and absolutey refuse to do anything that I ask of them and I know that it is because of my age. I also know this will continue even once I get my bar card (btw my appeal is looking good), because I see how they treat young female attorneys...And here is how I see it in this situation:

(1) You are my subordinate employee, end of story you need to treat me as an equal.
(2) I have legal expertise, you have administrative expertise lets all use our own skills and work together as a team.
(3) If you have a problem that I manage you simply because you are older than me, perhaps you need not be in the workplace at all because it takes all sorts of folks to run an office.
(4) Regardless of how intelligent everyone is (because believe me some of the folks I would consider the old biddy type the original post was about are intelligent people) my education entitles me to practice law, yours does not and you have no business second guessing.

I think women are just more competitive with each other. But I resent comments that people should not necessarily get respect for their education. I busted my ass in the most emotionally trying, back breaking, type of schooling there is. I emerged from law school pretty warn down, with a sleep disorder, with serious stress issues, and battle scars a plenty, and having stuck it through instead of taking the easy road and giving up well I think that deserves a little respect and I can totally see where people going through the same thing are coming from!

JeanieK 10-13-2006 06:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce's_Mom
Now I feel this to some extent. However, in my capacity as a law clerk I have encountered a number of legal secretaries that treat me like I am 5 and absolutey refuse to do anything that I ask of them and I know that it is because of my age. I also know this will continue even once I get my bar card (btw my appeal is looking good), because I see how they treat young female attorneys...And here is how I see it in this situation:

(1) You are my subordinate employee, end of story you need to treat me as an equal.
(2) I have legal expertise, you have administrative expertise lets all use our own skills and work together as a team.
(3) If you have a problem that I manage you simply because you are older than me, perhaps you need not be in the workplace at all because it takes all sorts of folks to run an office.
(4) Regardless of how intelligent everyone is (because believe me some of the folks I would consider the old biddy type the original post was about are intelligent people) my education entitles me to practice law, yours does not and you have no business second guessing.

I think women are just more competitive with each other. But I resent comments that people should not necessarily get respect for their education. I busted my ass in the most emotionally trying, back breaking, type of schooling there is. I emerged from law school pretty warn down, with a sleep disorder, with serious stress issues, and battle scars a plenty, and having stuck it through instead of taking the easy road and giving up well I think that deserves a little respect and I can totally see where people going through the same thing are coming from!

I can assure you, with that attitude you are going to have problems. And it has nothing to do with your age. It is because you are looking down on those people.

Just because your education is in a different field from theirs, does not mean that you are better, or more intelligent than they are.

I have a DIL with the same attitude as yours. She feels that because she has more education, that makes her smarter than her mother and me and therefore better than her mother and me. It doesn't. and until she learns that, she will never get along on the job or anywhere else.

See that is where the problem is, It's not because you are young or you look young it's because you ACT young.

But I see this is something that you are going to have to figure out on your own. So good luck.

And just for the record. I wouldnot go back to being your age for anything in the world. Life is much more comfortable when you get older. I like where I am at.


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