My grandfather I just spoke with my mom this morning she had just gotten off the phone with my grandfather and he told her that he could no longer see. Just light & dark and some shadows. We've known this was coming for the past 2 or 3 years. He has macular degenetration(sp) sorry I'm sure that is nowhere near right. Anyway, he had to go to the eye doctor a month or so ago he had some bleeding in his good eye. They didn't do any treatment I don't know if they could or not. He is in his mid to late 80's and he has been totally independent. We lost my grandmother to cancer 4 years ago, my dad almost 2 years ago. So now my mom will probably be moving in with him or him with her. Even though we knew this was coming it's still hard. Sorry didn't mean to depress everyone today. Just needed to vent a little. |
I'm so sorry. It's so hard watching our family age and develop problems - my parents are both 78 and worry me so much now - I am really sorry about your grandfather - that's got to be so hard for him. |
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Thanks Villette, it is hard on him even though he has been expecting it. He is in really good health other than this. I hope this won't get him so depressed that he just goes down hill from here. |
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blindness is managable and once you get the hang of it you can still be very independant. youre mom will probably want to think about codeing everything in his closet so that he can get dressed himself, and be very very careful about leaving items in the exact spot where he knows to find them. is he going to get a seeing eye dog/service dog? they are great for maintaining independence also. also, i know this may sound cruel, but make him do stuff that may seem difficult (and which he may ask help with).... if he tried and failed then guide him, dont do it for him |
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He can still distinguish between light & dark and see shadows, so he's not completely blind but I know it's still going to be hard on him. |
My mom has Macular Degeneration as well but she has it under control.. She was diagnosis about 10 years ago.. She takes many vitamins and go to a special dr every couple of years.. They have it under control.. Best of luck to your family!! |
I'm so sorry. Losing independence is probably the most difficult thing for the elderly, besides losing a spouse. Losing sight has got to be really tough. |
i'm so sorry. it must be so hard. :( i have your grandfather in my thoughts and prayers. |
I agree with Villette. It is just about the worst thing a child deals with as their parents age. I LOVE elderly people and spend a lot of time doing things for my neighbors some of whom are elderly. My favorite neighbors were in their 90's and because I had to leave nursing in hospitals or such, I was desperate for someone to help. They lovingly welcomed me into their home and were able to manage to stay in the home so that Jane died in her bed in her room with those who lovd her and Ned had only been hosp. a few days before his death. They would say they couldn't do this or that but we still pushed them as much as possible. Ned had MD as does their daughter now. I would advise y'all to let your grand dad make as many decisions about his care and life as possible. Elderly become very depressed when they have to give up control of their most personal things. Medical, financial and the like are very important to them.. |
My sympathies. Both of my aunts got it, and I thank God that my 85-year-old mother doesn't. We're a remarkably resilient being, though, and he can still live a rich life. I'm sure it will be difficult at first. One of my aunt's loves those audio books. And your spelling was correct. Macular degeneration. |
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather. I have an elderly friend that has that disease and she lost most of her eyesight on Mother's Day a few years back. Eyesight is a precious gift that none of us would ever want to do without and my heart aches for those with this disease and having to deal with the loss of vision. I will pray for your grandfather and I hope that he is able to deal with this and find ways to cope. Best wishes to you and your family! *HUG* |
So sorry about your Grandfather. Everyone here has given you lots of very good advice. Depression is the hardest thing to help them cope with. My Mom is 89 and just plagued with so many things ... totally dependent, and the hardest thing for me is to always try to be "upbeat" for her when I just want to scream at God for allowing this to happen to such a sweet, humble person! Encourage him and love him but do be firm ... he will probably surprise you! I think a service dog would not only help him physically but would help tremendously with his emotional health!! We will be praying for you and your family. |
Hi there, Sorry to hear about your grandfather :( While it is sad that he can no longer see (much) know that disabilities like this are by no means 'the end' of life. I have been in a wheelchair since I was 3 months old (gunshot wound) and I have always been very independent. I know what it feels like to think things are just so unfair because you can't do a certain thing on your own. I agree that depression must be dealt with, and I also agree that a dog could do wonders for him! Although, be careful with using the term 'helper dog' around him. If he is a proud man, he will most likely not warm up to this idea. He doesn't need a dog to show him how to live...perhaps. Maybe if that road turns sour just a dog in general would help. Bender is not much for carrying me up stairs, but he does wonders when I'm feeling down and need a hug. Another idea maybe you could look online for associations for the blind around his area. It may help him to make friends that are dealing with the same problems he is. I have a few blind friends, and they are awesomely independent! I realize he's not a young whippersnapper anymore, but age (and disability) are all a state of mind. Good luck! :thumbup: ~LeAnn |
So sorry to hear about your grandpa. My father is 87 and has had md for 2 years now. He has less than 5% of his sight left, but he can see some around the edges. What many people don't realize is losing sight at this age is harder because the elderly can't learn as much as a younger person. My father can't learn braille and gets confused so coding and such doesn't work. He can still vacuum and do minor chores and he has special places for things and nothing has been moved in the house since he lost his sight. Mom puts his pants and shirts in pairs for him. He can't cook anything though, or make a sandwich or get his medicine but he can take care of his personal hygiene. He can't see the tv, but we found him an extra large remote at Radio Shack and he has a watch and clock that tell him the time and mom glues pieces of rice to the redial on the phone for the times she has to leave him. The biggest thing to remember is to let him do as much as he can without help, to treat him as if he can see better than he can, to let him spill things and quietly clean up after instead of doing it for him. My dad won't hardly go anywhere now, he doesn't see the point in going places if he can't see things. Also, he doesn't have anything to do with himself, he was always busy and like to make things and now we're finding it hard to find things for him to do on his own. Depression hits often but we find if people will visit him he does better. I take care of him quite a bit because mom gets sick and he likes it when I come because he says I don't try to do things for him and treat him like somethings wrong with him and hang on him like my half sisters do whenever they're with him. Good luck and I will be praying for your family, this can be a very difficult time for everyone. |
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