I have... issues.. of my own. I won't get into them here (you can PM me if you want and I'll explain more), but I DO understand.

One thing that helped me is to try to focus your energy into something positive. I used to write poetry. I've got an entire binder dedicated to my poetry - most wasn't very happy, but it helped me feel like a person again. I know you can't work, but are you able to maybe volunteer for a few hours a week somewhere to do something good for the community? How about going on meetup.com and finding a group you might find an interest in like a married womans group to make some friends. Take up a crafty hobby like scrapbooking or something. Just try to divert your attention from what you don't have into what you DO have. It takes a lot of work to be happy again, but it can happen.

About the meds - if your meds are working for you now, how about getting them from your primary care doc instead? I get mine through mine instead of going to a pyschiatrist cause of multiple reasons and I'm doing just fine.

You are not alone. With everything that is happening in world and the economy I think everyone has felt like you at some point. I would suggest, first-get a full blood workup from either your primary care dr. or gyn to rule anything else out. Keep in mind, some medications deplete your system and vitamins and supplements are necessary depending on some medications that you are taking.
2ndly-Talk with them openly and honestly, they are there to help you and can only do so if you talk with them.
3rdly-keep a journal that obviously only for your eyes. Be TOTALLY, BRUELTALLY honest about anything and everything. It will help to vent and get your thoughts out on paper. This will help you to focus or at least try to figure out what might be the triggers for you that start you feeling sad.

- take baby steps...set small, little goals and rewards for yourself. What I mean is think of something that would make you feel better. could be to make sure you put your makeup on each day or get dressed each day, put an outfit on that you would normally not wear for a casual stay at home day. small little things.

I'm speaking from experience. There was a time that I was talking with my pcp and I felt like I was at the end of my rope and that I was not coping with things very well and had a breakdown right then and there. I started balling my eyes out. Fortunately he knew of some of what was happening he researched and found a medication that I could take as I needed it as I am on other meds that most anti depressants interact with. It helped for the short term. Enough for me to get some strength to make myself get up and get dressed each day and at least get out of the house for a couple of hours.
I'm not saying that was the cure all for me but it was a start and sometimes it takes just that small kick in the a$$ to get you going. I hope this makes some sense and that it helps in some way. Hugs to you.

I feel for you, my thoughts and prayers go out to you.

My heart really goes out to you. I have had only 2 panic attacks in my lifetime and they were over as quick as they started, but it was scary, the quick breathing, the heart beat sooo hard it feels like its going to come out of your chest.

I am blessed with the ability to know how to make myself relax and let things go. I have had my share of stress believe me, the worst being the devastating break up I had with my ex-fiance of 10 years. Whenever I feel like Im at the bottom of the barrel I try to remind myself of a few things

1. It could be worse
2. Everyone has their own demons
3. take a mini-vacation from myself (get out of my head and into a good book and a glass of wine/ some GOOD chocolate, a hot bath/or a warm chair in the sun... something... even for just 1 hour is sometimes all it takes to revive me for another month of life coming full-speed at ya!)

I know this advice is not near what you probably need, but I hope that something small, all about you, once a day can help to begin to alleviate some of the small everyday stress!~

im praying for each and everyone on you .. cheer up :)

I was in SEVERE depression about 6.5 years ago and never ever thought I was going to make it. At one point I had actually hoped I wouldn't. I lost my son, age 20, 6.5 years ago. I'll never be the same but I think that depression was even a light word to use. But medication and meeting other parents helped me to know I wasn't alone. The medication is not a cure all, but I am not ashamed to be taking it either. It is probably what has kept me sane for 6.5 years.
I really hope that even talking and venting here has helped you a bit.
I'm sending you many bear hugs

Carol and baby Jemma

It's ok for you to tell how you feel on here. It's probably good therapy to know your not alone. I think like some of the other post....we all go through this at one time or another in our life. Some is worse than others. I've been down to some extent over the past year because of so many changes in my life that i don't like. I'm not one that accepts change well.:) But i know in the back of my mind God will get me through this like he always does.

Also i agree with someone else posted to find something positive to do. That will help because you don't focus on the negative as much. Hang in there you'll make it. It's just really tough sometimes and as I type this I know words seems inadequate, but on YT that's the only way we can help each other is through words.;)

Hope this helps some......and i'll keep you in my prayers.:)

oh i forgot to tell you, the teenagers are a pain....lol be patient they do come around eventually and show their appreciation for you in time. I've raised 3 teenagers which the last one is 18 and she's graduating next month. I know how you feel when it comes to this subject.:D

I was going to suggest this too. I felt pretty close to where you are at one time and had the Fibro dx. I tell you I hate that dx because it makes it easy for doctors to blame everything that happens on it. I was so depressed, so sore and achy, fatigued did not begine to explain how tired, and so many little physical things.... After a few years of trying to find answers, it turned out my thyroid had bottomed out. The first test they did was only mildly low so no one tested again for years. By the time they did it was obvious what my problem was. Once I was on full replacement thyroid meds it made a world of difference. Most depression is just that, but there is a pretty good sized percentage that is the result of an underlying physical condition. Just be sure they have checked everything well.

I wish you well whatever the cause may be. Sounds like you have done a lot of self talk. The answers are in your post. But I know it takes a lot of reinforcement. I will keep you in my prayers.

i think everyone feels how you feel every now and then. I read a couple people on here are taking lexapro. Lexapro didnt work for me so i switched to effexor which is great...:) Sometimes medications dont work, but for, having high anxiety it works very well..

I hope things start to look up for you!! Start focusing on the positive instead of the negative. It might make you feel better:) Think about the things that make u happy!:)

:big_hug:to everyone, glad you are venting is not good to keep everything inside, will say a pray for each of one of you tonight, who feel that way:ghug: just remember the devil is a lier and he hates us for been God creation.

right now yes i do hate my life. i wish i could reverse things or had some special power to heal or something:( hugs to you, i hope you are okay