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That is ALL I expect of her. She doesn't have to LIKE anything I do, but she does have to respect it. She doesn't have to like me either, but as DH's wife and the mother of her grandchildren, she DOES have to respect me. I don't like her, but I do respect her just because whether I like it or not she IS still DH's mother. Now she will be calling the rest of the family crying and saying things like, "I just don't know what I did to make her mad this time. *sniff* Now she won't let me see my baby. *sniff*" :rolleyes: Because you know, making my child sick and calling her a bad word and telling her that what I say doesn't matter are no reason for me to get mad and keep Livvy home. :rolleyes: |
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I am a vegetarian, also. Your mother in law is doing these things to make you mad on purpose. She is basically thumbing her nose at you, and wants to let you know she has the power! I think supervised visits is the only way to go, but I would definitely tell her why (the haircuts, the meat). There is nothing reasonable that she can say in her own defense....she was wrong, end of story! You sound like a strong person, god bless you!! Good luck!! |
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Bad form on MIL behavior. Over the line. I'd say something to DH. |
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OK, now I am a little calmer. I am still angry, but not the 'rip off her head and poop down her throat' kind anymore. I am going to wait until DH gets home to call her. That way she can't say I said anything I didn't say. |
Make DH call her |
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And for her to denigrate you in FRONT of your child and on purpose? With intention? Wow. That is a border I would never allow her to cross again, period. Sadly, there are personal boundaries we have to put up sometimes - and then enforce so our own lives work. And, you really cannot worry as to whether or not those boundaries work for others or not - sounds like you have some BIG boundaries to put up, my dear! What a piece of WORK. I'd be THROUGH the roof! |
I have to say that I disagree with the general opinion here that YOU should call her and let her have it. The person YOU should be talking to is DH. It is HIS Mom.. HE should be standing behind you and if he isn't, then HE is the one I would go full barrels against. He should be the one that goes to her and tells her that he is behind you 100% and that he wants HER behind you 100% too. It is NOT FAIR to YOU to put you in a position to defend your child rearing methods and beliefs. If you go to her, there surely will be lasting hard feelings. Your DH needs to have a UNITED FRONT WITH YOU! Your MIL will not hold a grudge against her own son like she will with you. |
How terrible, she should not have lied to your poor little girl. And it made her sick. If she doesn't like you she should not take it out on your daughter. I would just tell her strait out it made her sick and she was wrong. And yeah, you are toally justified with only giving her supervised visits. It's sad it has to be like that but she brought it on. I would also recommend not bringing your husband into it too much...you don't want to get in a fight with him just bc of something his mother did. And yes, no matter what he will feel inclined to defend her. Your his wife, she's his mother so he shouldn't have to get involved you know? It's an awkward spot to be in. |
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Been there, done that and divorced him. |
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