I am so sorry your mom passed. My mother passed away April of last year. It's hard dealing with the anger, grief and the feeling of lost. Don't think your family has moved on, they still think of her. Don't feel you do not need to move on your mother wants you too. When dealing with pain like having a mother pass you really need your family its very important to talk to them and recieve comfort from them.. Please smile and know she still loves you and you her. Smile and think of the good times no one can take that from you.

I agree....i feel awkward talking to people i dont know. i love YT because i feel so comfortable here! thats why i turned to you guys when i was about to lose my mind yesterday! i want to thank you all so very very much! all of your posts made me cry but it also makes me feel soo much better to hear from people that care and understand. i spoke to my doctor from home and i am going back on medicine. hopefully that will help me get through this rough patch so i can continue on with my life. i know she wants me to be happpy but part of me doesnt want to be without her. i just dont understand why God does these things?! i used to have such strong faith and now i am so angry and hurt. i feel myself slipping into depression so it is a good thing that i talked to you all and have decided to get on medicine. when it comes down to it.....I WANT HER BACK!!! i want to call her and hug her and watch movies with her and hear her laugh! i feel like it has been so long and i would give anything for just one more day with her! I find myself calling her phone sometimes too, and sometimes i think i see her and i will run out from where i am at, im sure i loook crazy! but for me the worst is the dreams....i will often have dreams about her as if she was still alive, but they do not comfort me. instead i wake up depressed bc i have to relive telling myself it was just a dream and she really is gone! i dont want anyone to think i am an unkind person, bc i was always the most loving person in the world, but now i find myself not wanting to love anyone else for fear of losing them! i am terrified God is going to take someone else from me! it is almost consuming at times, and i try to bring myself back to reality but i find myself pulling away from everyone...

I am so glad to hear you decided to give the meds a try. They have really helped me. I know how you feel, I just want my mom back! I haven't had any dreams about her but somedays I wake up and think for one moment every thing is fine and then reality sets in. I find myself so many times thinking I have to tell my Mom that. One of my saddest feelings is that she never got to meet my birth son as we didn't meet until 6 weeks after she passed. She would have loved him so much. If you need to talk anytime pm me.

I wish I could reach through my computer and :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: you!!!!
I PROMISE I am going to be praying for you EVERYDAY!!!!!

My Mom died when she was 44 - and I was 21. That was 18 years ago and it is STILL painful, but much easier and bearable. It takes a LOT of time, reflection, healing for the pain to lessen/change. It never truly goes away, but it does change, and it does get easier.

A book I found very validating is "Motherless Daughters" - it's a book about women who've lost their mothers. The shared experiences were very validating, healing, and similar. You are NOT alone, my friend - and I wish I could make it all better for you.

Therapy can help a ton - have you thought about it? Or a support group?

Big hugs to you. My heart really goes out to you.

I just lost my dad 39 days ago and I'm not coping either. I have very strong faith in the Lord, but I am ticked off at him right now. And my brain is not agreeing with my heart. I know I am being selfish, but I need my Father here, God should of healed him!

No one understands how I feel either. Everyone is moving on but me. I can barely function. I am a mess. My 5 year old keeps telling me to stop crying, "papa is in Heaven" But that means nothing to me. I want him here with me! Now!!!

It totally sucks (I dont allow anyone in my house to say that word, but it is the only one that really fits and I have been saying it alot) :(

People are so nice and try to help, even if they been through it. But I just feel like I am dying. I would like to die, too to be with my dad. I have a husband and 3 kids to take care of, I am not suicidal. But I don't know how I'll get through another day.

My heart is literally broken, it aches so bad (here i sit at 3:58 am) and my right arm is aching. I can't eat, sleep or anything either. My mom is pushing me to go to grief counseling, but I can't do it yet.

I feel horrible for you and me.

I just keep hoping Jesus will come and I can have my daddy back now!!!

PM me any time.

http://www.motherlessdaughters.org/ is a website that you can light a candle for your Momma. Bless you and talking from your heart is the first step toward healing. You will always miss your Momma and in time you won't feel so broken. I promise you.

Warmly, Deborah

i just want to thank everyone again so much for your kind words and prayers. some days are bad some days are ok....but when i started this thread it was a very very bad day and everyones advice and similar stories really helped!! thank you all so very much!
God Bless