Grieving
 

I am grieving over the loss of my 14 year old, sweet boy Freado. It will be one month, tomorrow, that he has been gone, yet it feels like forever. I have never felt such pain and loneliness in my life. Someone, please, please tell me that it will eventually get easier. I know it will never go away completely, and I wouldn't want it to, as he was my true heart and soul.

Thank you ~ B

My heart goes out to you. I know the loss feels like the end of the world. You are right - the pain will never go away but speaking from experience you will learn to manage it. Everyone handles grief in their own way. Some people might bury themselves in their job. Others might want to volunteer at a shelter. Some may go get another furbaby. You will never heal completely buy time will ease your pain. My prayers are with you during this time of pain. Just keep in mind that Freado is now healthy and strong and waiting for you at Rainbow Bridge.

I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet Freado. It is so hard to let our sweet little companions go. They are so very close to us and the void can be a lonely sad time. I know when I lost my Bree two years ago the grief would over take me at times. It just did'nt seem like I would ever get pass that time in my life. But as time passed I had to get another little one.Yes at first even adjusting to the new little boy wasn't so easy. But one day when I broke down in one of my grief moments he came over on the floor where I had crumpled. He kissed me and sat down as if he knew my heart. I was so amazed by his action we began to bond because he was so sensitive to my need. I do pray for the healing of your broken heart it might take sometime. Hold onto the precious times you two shared they will help you to come through this heart breaking time. By the way I still cry over my baby girl after two years have come and gone. I'm sending you a big hug we all need one every now and then.

Thank you for coming here and sharing your grief for Freado with us as you have. I too have lost a sweet little girl of 16 years of age a couple years ago and it has gotten less painful through the weeks and months. I still hurt over losing her much but it is not as heartwrenching as it was and it will be the same for you. Bless you B and welcome to YT and share with us any time you feel the need.

I recently suffered the loss of my sweet friend, Milo (July). He was 3 and we adored him. He had acute pancreatitis and we were shocked by the suddenness of his illness and death. During this time, I have cried many tears and so has my husband. Through a series of coincidences, we ended up with a five year old Yorkie named Casey. While Milo was almost 20 pounds, this little one is 5 pounds. He truly rescued us from the depths of sorrow. I think about Milo every day and miss him beyond description but our new friend has been a Godsend. Not everyone can face getting a new pup right away but it helped us tremendously. The pain of Milo's loss isn't as crushing and our dispair has lessened. I am so sorry for your loss. My heart is so sad for you. Spending time on this forum helped me a great deal. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

I truly appreciate all of your kind and thoughtful words. During my grieving time, I have come to two realizations... 1. I cannot expect myself to get over 14 years with the snap of a finger, and 2. I don't have anyone to talk to about this sadness that I am going through. Most of my friends still have kids at home, and although they may have pets, they still have children to raise. The ones who don't have pets, still have children to raise, but they have never had that pet bond. I always treated Freado as if he were my little human son. I never had or wanted children of my own, but married into a "ready-made" family, that included a wonderful and loving little four year old girl. I adopted her, have loved and taken care of her as my own. She is now in her last year of college. So for the last three years it was Husband, Freado and I. The three of us going everywhere together. When we remodeled our house, Freado went to countless showrooms and meetings with me. When Husband goes to work, Freado was my little shadow and companion when we were at home. Now I find that when Husband goes to work, I am really alone, and lonely. I know this is going to sound a little strange, but the last few years when Freado's health would be up and down, I would talk to him about him having a successor. I told him that she, "Franchessca", would be a little Biewer, but that I would never forget him, not in a million years. I hope to have that little fury bundle sometime in December or January. I will be looking for a breeder who has little ones in late September. Although I have a plan, I just need to get through these next few months, and hopefully during that time, find some peace in the thoughts that my little boy is gone. I know this has been a long post and I appreciate, once again, those of you who are out there helping those of us in here going through these hard times. ~ B

Dear B,
Well,now you do have someone to talk to about the loss of your sweet friend Freado. Even though it may not be as good as actually talking face to face your are always welcome to come and talk to us about anything you are going through because of his loss to you.

You will find that we are very good listeners here.

It always rips my heart out to come to this section, but there is no place on this whole site that speaks more to what these little personalities mean to us and how much they make our lives whole and rich. Love them every day that you have them, because one day, we will have to wait until we reach the bridge ourselves to see them again.

Memories and such...
 

So, when Freado was little, meaning younger, not in size, we had a nickname for him "Nubbins". Where, when, or how, I'm not quite sure. Seems like one day, it just came out..."Hey, Nubbins!". Well, it stuck, and that was one of many of Freado's nicknames. Funny, when I looked up the word "Nubbins", not expecting to find the word in any dictionary, one of the definitions was..."a small lump or stunted piece; stub...". Who would've/could've known?! Freado was always fascinated with Pooh, yes as in the Disney character. How that came about, is another story! Anyway, I had a small stuffed Pooh Bear, just like his larger stuffed one that I would take with me on trips, when Freado couldn't go with us. Can you guess what its name was.? Well, of course, "Pooh Nubbins"! I have been traveling with that stuffed animal for years. Good, bad, or indifferent, Freado always slept in bed with us, and Pooh Nubbins would comfort me when Freado couldn't be there. Years later when Freado was having some troublesome health issues and I thought I might loose him, I had the foresight to have his paw bronzed. Not his real paw of course! However, if you press a paw into some white Play-Doh and ship it off to a company, they will make it into bronze, aluminum, or brass. Naturally, I had to have one of each! They engraved his name onto the back of each piece, and on two of them, they made a hole at the top, so it could be hung. I felt that one of these would be a perfect charm to hang off of a Thomas Mann infinity heart bracelet for Pooh Nubbins to wear as his neck jewelry. Together, paw and bear, when I had to travel without my Freado, I always felt like there was a piece of him with me. Since Saturday, July 25th, 2015, the day that my sweet Nubbins, Freado, had to leave me, a night hasn't gone by that I haven't slept with Pooh Nubbins and his neck jewelry.
~ B

So sorry for your loss. Hugs and prayers.

I had my first vivid dream the other night, with Freado in it. The seen was set at my childhood home back in Texas. (I often wonder why people, places, and things from the past appear in our dreams.) We were leaving the house to go into the back yard through the sliding glass door and as we are walking through the short grass, a white bird, not very large, but with quite a large orange beak, tried to swoop down and attack Freado! Now Freado was about 10-11 pounds and there was no way this bird was going to pick him up, it was more like it wanted to peck him with that strange orange beak. Freado was just running around, not even noticing that he was in any danger. I kept swatting at the bird trying to get it to go away, but it was very persistent. Next thing I know, another bird, same kind shows up! The first bird kept flying lower and lower, and in true dream fashion, all of the sudden I was holding a broom, you know the kind with the wooden handle and straw bristles, and I was swatting at it. Well, finally one of my swats connected with that bird and stunned it to the ground! This is where it gets a little graphic, for those with week stomachs... Once again, in dream land where anything and everything is possible, I have an oversized ice pick in my hand and while the bird is down, I gently, no blood, push it through the bird, still no blood. Freado just sat there and watched, with that quizzical look on his face like he was learning something. Then the whole scenario happened all over again with the second bird. So, now we have two vicious bird bodies, still no blood, just laying there. I looked at Freado and said, "Well I guess we will have to bury them.?". I dug a hole, placed the birds inside, Freado watching me the whole time. As I was filling the hole, Freado started to play in the dirt! Now in real life, anytime I was working in the yard, which I loved to do and quite often, Freado would be close by in a flower bed and because we live in Florida with the hot sun, he would always find a shady place, dig around a little, just enough to move the mulch and lay in the cool dirt-sand. He would lay there with his head on the mound of mulch-dirt-sand and watch me with those big brown eyes and if I moved to work in a different area, he would too, and do the same routine all over again. Of course, when I was done in the yard, before going inside, I would have to go around all of the flower beds and put the dirt-sand and mulch back into place. I really miss those days... Now back to the dream. Freado was playing in the dirt, while I finished the makeshift grave. He was covered from head to toe in dirt and I just kept smiling because he was having so much fun! At one point, when I was done, he stopped and looked-up at me with those big brown eyes, I was just laughing! "Hey you, dirty dog, now we're going to have to get a bath!". He started to run around, like he used to when he was younger, the kind of running around that says, "come and chase me around the yard!". I'm sure you all know what I'm talking about! And that was it. The end of the dream. I didn't really know what I was supposed to get from this dream, but now after writing and reading this, I see a Mom protecting her Son, and the joy of playtime! But also the part about death...is it because Freado is now gone... It almost seems like this dream was just little bits and pieces of our lives together. At least, that's how I'm going to read it, because that makes me feel good and a little more peaceful about my little boy being gone. ~ B

Every Day...
 

Every day I shed tears over my sweat Son Freado...It's almost like I can't control it. I look at his picture, someone will say something, a thought or memory comes to mind, and I cry. I don't cry uncontrollable anymore, just tears and dead space. I had another dream about him the other night...It was just him and I. He just kept wanting me to give him belly rubs...he really, really loved that. October
25th will be the marking of only 3 months, and yet it feels like a lifetime that I have had the opportunity to hold him in my arms. Need I say more.?!
Thanks ~ Barbara

I am so sorry for your loss. I think I can speak for most here on YT when I say that YES we understand exactly what you are going through. You never stop missing them but as time goes by it does get a bit easier to deal with & the sorrow turns into a smile whenever you think of them & remember their little antics. Maybe you should consider adding a new little bit of happiness into your life. One can never replace a lost loved one but I always find it easier if I get another pup to love & nurture & it has always helped the pain ease when you have something to distract you.

The grieving unfortunately continues. I feel your pain. Sometimes when you start looking for your next baby it helps with the grief. A new baby won't replace your Freado but may add some joy into your lives.

dog
 

Barbara oh what pain we go through when our little friends go back to their creator. So much love is inside our dogs truly they are family. Where do they go. I believe in heaven and the Lord calls all His precious creatures home there. There is happiness and joy. Freado will be waiting for you. God knows our needs and will send great comfort to you. Seek Him in prayer i am sending lover and prayers .

Finally...
 

As I have previously mentioned, several years ago, when we had a health scare with Freado, I had his paw print cast in bronze, brass, and aluminum. I highly recommend doing this with your beloved fur-member, it is not expensive, and an awesome memento. In searching for a way to memorialize my sweet little boy, I had decided to get that paw print tattooed on my ankle, in his birthstone color, March-Aquamarine. I am no stranger to tattoo memorials, I have a Gerber Daisy on my back that represents my regal cat, of 13 years, Godiva. I use the words "finally" and "had decided" because I would have done this sooner, the day he was taken from me, but appointments don't come that easy, I guess unless you know someone in the business. I am lucky that my Husband is good with me doing these things to never forget my fur-babies, as he knows how much they mean to me...

The mold is a terrific idea.

So sorry for your loss
 

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my dear yorkie Rocky 3 weeks ago. He was only 10 and had been healthy his whole life. He was sick less than 24 hours. I left to go to work ( a new job ) for 4 hours and he looked ok with the intention to take him to the vet when I came home. When I came home, he was gone! He was like my right arm. I couldn't stop crying for days. I couldn't stand my house. I was so unhappy.
The solution FOR ME was Duncan. I am getting better. I am happy again. Even though I call Duncan Rocky ALOT!:) luckily he doesn't mind :D

Halloween
 

Everyone who knows me, knows that Halloween is my favorite holiday. Yes I know most don't consider it a holiday, but I do. Actually, it’s the only holiday I really enjoy. I can sum it up in one word, creative. My Husband recently pointed out to me that, in a Wall Street Journal article, people like me are called "Haunters". Most Halloweens we have done something, whether it was turning our side yard into a haunted maze, blacking out the garage and making my Husband aka "Dracula" lay in a coffin (which was very popular, so we did that for many years), until now, when a year ago we bought T.E.D. T.E.D. Is a 21' Necromancer. He's over the top, but very cool. Because of T.E.D., my Husband no longer has to lay in a coffin (that was the agreement when Husband allowed me to purchase him). There have been very few exceptions for us not to put on our fright-night, but now, one in particular stands out in my mind… Several years ago, we had to go to Ft. Lauderdale for one of my Husband’s work conferences. Can you guess what week-end it fell on, yep, Halloween. As per usual, Freado came with us. I just love pet friendly hotels, in particular, because of their consistency, The W Hotel, The Rits, and The Four Season, just to name a few. We had friends at the conference and since it was over Halloween and I couldn’t be doing my usual fright fest at the house, they brought a few surprise items along to ease my pain. They even brought a little costume for Freado. So sweet of them, right? That year, he was a pumpkin dog! He was really sweet to let me put it on him, although I don't think he felt orange was quite his color. This will be the first year in 14 years that I won’t have my special pumpkin dog by my side.

Plain and simple...I just miss him 😓

dog
 

Oh freado was the cutest little friend. Why must we go through such sorrow. You loved him so much and it's a huge loss not having him. I am crying while writing this. My comfort is knowing that little freado spirit is still with you. He will never leave your heart. All life ends on this earth but there's a place for us and freado is there waiting for you. How God loves His creatures. They are with Him. I believe this. My friends dog Cappy went there. Kim was devastated. She rescued a Yorkie Grandpa. Sure helped her grief. Captain is with her in spirit she tells me. My prayers for you. You are one special lady the way you love your yorkie. Yes freado was a wonderful friend and companion. With you always

I feel your pain
 

I'm a brand new member here. I realized I am not alone with the deep pain and sadness of losing a pet. My baby died 5 days ago and I cry all day. Her name was Teddi and she was 10. Im so sorry for your loss and I feel your pain.

I am so sorry for your loss, I can empathize as I lost Jingle in January. I too cried all day/night for awhile. At times I still do. I pray your pain will ease as the good memories of Teddi come to your mind. (Hugs)

Your pain really hits home with me... My oldest precious baby is 14 and I have just recently made imprints of his paws and plan to get a tattoo like yours! Everyday I'm so worried about if or when he's going to leave me... I don't know what to say but that I feel your heartache and I hope that as the days pass you will feel a little less sorrow. It will I'm sure take quite some time. What happened to freado? How did he pass away? I hope you don't mind me asking but my boy is seemingly healthy but anything could happen.

Thank You
 

This is one of the most difficult post to write, but I would like to thank you all for caring and sharing your thoughts with me. Mostly, you all have helped me to realize that there are other people in this world who love their little fur-kids deeply, like myself. Yesterday was a tough day for me. Husband and I had a boat built. Freado always liked to go boating with us. He liked to be with us, and I'm hoping it wasn't just for the treat factor, Freado was a true chow hound, he'd do anything for a scrap. It took roughly two years and during that time Freado was right by our side, just like when we built the house, he went from show-room to show-room with us picking out everything from plumbing fixtures, fabrics, to door hardware. We had countless meetings, with him sitting right next to me. During those two years I never pictured him not being right there by our side, on this new boat with us. It just wasn't a thought. It was just assumed he'd be sharing in this next journey with Husband and I. At the age of 14 he started to really show signs of deterioration. At first it was the typical stuff, cloudy eyes, a little hearing loss, which we labeled as "selective hearing". I started to notice that when we would come home, if gone for 5 minutes or 5 hours, he'd be sleeping on a rug in the furthest part of our closet. Then he started to have liver and kidney issues. But what really took him, was arthritis. He had arthritis for several years, but was managed with occasional medication. When Freado was young, his right knee blew-out. We had it fixed, but almost a year to the day later, his left one blew-out as well. We had it fixed and sometimes he would walk a little sideways, made my little "radar ear" dog even cuter. As with most everything, we learn from our mistakes. Our mistake was allowing Freado to jump off and on furniture, something we won't let our next fur-child do. Yes, we do plan to have another fur-child in the near future, but that will be a separate post. I started carrying him down the stairs to go potty, because he wasn't able to make that trip anymore. What really amazed us, was how quickly the arthritis took over his little body. It seemed as though one day we turned around and bam, he was no longer our happy little boy. The arthritis got so bad that after he would lay down and go to sleep, he would jump up yelping in such great pain, that he no longer wanted to sleep in bed with us, which really made me extremely sad, he would rather roam the house than lay down and get so stiff that it hurt him that bad to get back up. This all happened in less than two weeks. It killed us to see him in such pain and that is when we knew. Everyone said we'd know when the right time would be. I didn't understand how we were supposed to know, but they were right, it's just something that happens. We made arrangements for our most wonderful vet in the world to come to the house. This past week, as we brought our new boat home, a helicopter was taking pictures of us while we were underway and my Husband turned to me and said, "I wish Freado was here, he's been in every one of our boat pictures."...

That must have been such a difficult decision to make but just know that you made the right choice for your little precious Freado. He is not suffering in pain any longer. It's so great that there is at home euthenasia available. To know that your little boy wasn't afraid or scared when you helped him pass on. Thank you so much for sharing your story and it will forever remain in my heart. I'm so sorry for the pain you and your husband are experiencing, I hope that you will open your heart to another special pup in the future as I'm sure it will help heal the void that sweet Freado has left behind. Another little soul to go along with you on your boat rides and adventures. Not to replace Freado but to be able to love and share new memories with. Sounds like Freado had a wonderful full life.

I am so sorry for all of you that have lost your best friends. I hope you all can open your hearts in the future to adding another puppy to your lives. Grief can take over and harden your hearts. Hope you can move forward soon.