| reddingerparty4 | 07-01-2010 05:57 AM |
I'm so very sorry, if I could just turn back the hands of time.
All my life I’ve always wanted a tiny little yorkie. When I finally decided to get one, I found a wonderful breeder in Missouri, I felt like I had known her forever. Though her husband wanted to keep Trinket as a pet, she relented and let me purchase Trinket. I promised to take great care of Trinket. I flew in/out of Missouri the same day because I didn’t want Trinky to be scared flying to Cleveland by herself. I have cried non-stop for 3 days, I just don’t understand why this had to happen? I was so very very careful. And still, I wasn’t careful enough. I was so proud to have loved such a wonderful little Yorkie, I had the very best and I literally let her slip right through my fingers. We had terrible storms on Sunday that knocked down trees and knocked out our power. On Monday, I decided to stay home from work. With no electricity I couldn’t do much so I decided to bath Trinky, I brushed her hair and her teeth. She was cold so we went out in the warm sunshine, just long enough to dry off while we waited for my husband to come back from a Drs appt. We were walking back to the house when Trinky slipped out of my arms, fell on her tiny little head and died instantly…just that quick. If I could have just a second longer to tell her how much I love her and how very sorry I am. What I wouldn’t give if I could just have a little more time with her. There isn’t a Trinky curled up in any one of her 4 beds throughout the house, she’s not on my lap when I’m peeing, she’s not at the top of the stairs telling me it’s time for bed she’s not even at the bottom of the stairs barking. She’s not walking me to the door when I leave, she’s not sitting at the door to greet me when I return, she’s not anywhere. She may have been too small to show or too little to breed, but to me, She was perfect absolutely perfect. She may have been small but her wonderful personality was large and endless. I wouldn’t have changed a thing about her. She was perfect just the way she was. She would look at me with her adoring soulful eyes, bump me with her little black button nose or throw her butt at me to try and get her way while barking and biting because she wanted me to let go of her toy. It hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts. I don’t even know what I could have done differently to have prevented such a horrible accident other than put her down to walk in the wet grass instead of carrying her. All we did was go outside for a minute to enjoy the warm sunshine. How could a good deed go so wrong? God I’m so very sorry. I’m sick to my stomach and overwhelmed with grief. What else could I of done to protect her any better than I did? She used pee pads in the house to do her business and the only time she slept in bed with me was for a short nap in the afternoon on a Saturday or Sunday because I was afraid she would get under my pillow or a blanket and I would suffocate her. We spent our lazy moments watching TV on the couch or she was in the recliner with Keith, my husband. I knew not to let her jump off of the furniture so she had puppy steps to go up and down. I bought her a playpen. I bought her a stroller. She had 6 different pet carriers. The only treats she got were baby carrots or Wellness treats the only food she ate was Canidae…only the very best for my Trinky. She went for rides in the car, only when someone else went along to wait with her, I was afraid a stranger would steal her. I would always scramble her an egg every Sunday morning. I don’t get it. I’m so angry and so hurt. Why did this have to happen to me and Trinky? I don’t get it. I can hardly see through all my tears. Oh God, please make all of this hurt go away. Though she came from Championship blood lines, she wasn’t a status symbol for me…she was my little princess and I loved her dearly. Godspeed Trinky for I will always love you and be forever sorry. | 