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Yorkies & Divorce Hi all... I need some help. When I left my husband last year, it was decided that since the condo I was moving in didnt have a fence, that the yorkies would stay with him. Altho, my ex is a lousy husband and dad, he is absolutely wonderful with Diesel and Daisy. Everything has been fine up until now. He is now selling our home and taking Diesel and Daisy to live with his new girlfriend and her children. I cant imagine not being able to see them when I want to. Plus they will be an hour away. I cant split them up so I can have one and he have one. I am literally worrying myself sick over this. Does anyone have any suggestions? Im almost to the point where I am going to go steal them from him, but then, there are issues with Diesel and Daisy staying at home alone during the day while Im at work. Thanks |
Unless he willingly gives the yorkies to you, I say the only thing you can do it 1) steal them, or 2) take him to court over them. |
Stealing is going to be my only option I think. What makes me sick is that my husband wont fight over seeing our son, but he will fight over the dogs. |
aww hope everything works out! |
Well you did leave them with your husband and you have said he is very good with them. You could have found a place to have your dogs or you could have put up a fence but you choose to leave them behind. I say leave them with your husband and move on with your life, don't keep upsetting your dogs life. Make a commitment to them for their life or let them go. Be sure before you fight for them or try and steel them that you can provide a good home for them. |
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I had to leave my JRT with my ex-husband 6 years ago when we separated because I moved into an apartment. When I bought a house he would not let me have her. She has been happy I think but she has not been spoiled and pampered like I would have done. I did not want to leave her, but at that time I had to do what was best for me and my daughter and an apartment was my only choice. I hate when you have to try to defend yourself and your decisions to complete strangers, and I hate when people judge you and say "well you did leave her there" when they don't know anything about the circumstances. I really regret leaving my JRT Becca behind, so if there is any way you can get your babies back then you need to do it. He might be a good dad to the dogs now but after he moves in with his girlfriend and she starts whining about them he might change his tune, not to mention her kids. But on the other hand, maybe his girlfriend will hate the dogs and he will give them back to you....hopefully her kids will be allergic to them and he will have to give them back to you....:D ...Good luck |
You are correct, I did leave them with my husband when I left. If things would have stayed the same meaning, he stayed in his house, then I would be ok with seeming the dogs every other night. But with him moving an hour away to a house that has no fence, and has 6 kids running around, that isnt in the best interest of the dogs. I had to leave in a hurry for my safety, and with living in a condo, I cant put up a fence. However, I am more prepared to have them with me now. I was just asking for advice if anyone else has gone thru the same situation. |
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Sometime people don't have a lot of choices when they are leaving in a hurry and also their income is cut in half. |
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I wouldnt steal the dogs. At one tme it was most convenient for you to give them to him. From that point on they became his dogs not yours. I think if you steal them you are no better than a person who sees a dog in a back yard and wants it and steals it |
I feel like I am getting pounced on becasue I "left" them. The reason I left them is because I was in the hospital with a broken neck and a 9 hour surgery because of my husbands actions. When I left the hospital, I didnt go back to my home. My parents did all they could to help me, but who was going to take care of my dogs while my parents were in the hospital with me. I just wanted to make it clear that I didnt leave them by choice. Thank you everyone for your advice. |
You said he loves the dogs and is very good with them, and at the time, it was for the best they stayed with him. Well, it sounds like maybe now you have the better situation for them (6 kids), have you asked him to let you have them? If you used to visit them every other night, it sounds like maybe you do have a good enough relationship to discuss what is best for the dogs? I hope this all works out for you and for him and especially for the :aimeeyork :aimeeyork 's!! **oops we posted at the same time** maybe he isn't so reasonable after all!! Have you asked him to let you have them?? What did he say?? |
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I didnt want to have to tell that he broke my neck. But I guess it was an important deciding factor. |
I don't think it's a completely different story than what she lst said. I just think she didn't want to go into the details about how her husband treated her and that she is trying to tell us she had no other choice. I hope you can get your sweet Yorkies back, it sounds like you need them as much as they need you. :) Life sure isn't fair in so many situations.:( |
I am sorry that hapened to you. If he did that how did you know he wouldnt hurt the yorkies too? |
Please lets not be so jugdemental here. We can't sit her and say we would do this or that, we can't possibly know unless we walked in her shoes. She did what was best at the time and she said he is a great fur Dad. |
Have you ASKED him if you could have them or if you could buy them from him or something like that? |
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Oh, I am so sorry you and your child have to go through this. If you could raise enough money to ask in a non-threatening way, so that his girlfriend knows you are willing to pay to get them back, she might help pressure him to let them go to you. I have a loved one going thru a terrible divorce and it is horrible, so I feel for you having a child and fur babies involved, not to mention your own safety. Let us know what happens -- your YT will be there for you, I'm sure. |
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I am so sorry you are going though all this and I hope it all works out for you and you pups. If you need to vent some steam feel free to PM me I am a great listener:) (((((HUGS))))), Lori |
Ive seen this happen before... this loving, supportive environment turn the wrath on when they dont like what they hear. Noone EVER needs to EXPLAIN their personal decisions to anyone else on the INTERNET! If you feel you need to know more about someone before you can support them, then DON'T post at all. That way noones feelings get hurt even more. YorkieMom2 - did you ever make a deal with your ex that youd get the dogs back when you were ready for them? Was the solution of them staying with him assumed to be forever? Maybe you can talk to your ex husband into going in on a new pup for you and letting him keep your other babies. I know its going to hurt you so much to let them go and possibly not see them very often if at all... but it may be better for you emotionally to deal with the loss of them than with the emotions of dealing with your abusive ex husband in a 'custody battle'. I wish you all the luck in the world, this is a tough situation! Id hate to be in your shoes and my heart goes out to you! I think 2 tiny Yorkies mixed in with 6 kids is a bit dangerous! Tell your ex that! :) |
Ask him I would ask him for the pups back, considering his new situation it may be easier for him to give them up to you now. Or if you are on speaking terms to the new gf talk to her. She may want you to have the dogs. I know some men will fight with you just to be spiteful and show that they still have control over you. If that is the case, it might be less stressful for you to give them up. I would not want to see you put in a situation that would cause you any furthur harm.Good luck.:aimeeyork There are a lot of pups that need a good mommyto take care of them |
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Would you like to have them on weekends or something like that? Talk to him. |
If he is a good dad to the yorkies, maybe you can now get your own little baby yorkie to keep and arrange for visitations with the older two? |
For the record, I was only kidding about stealing the dogs.......... |
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