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PLEASE HELP! Puppy aggressive towards child. Hi, I'm a newbie and my girl is about 7 months old. She's very sweet and loving with one exception- when my daughter tries to hold her, she growls and snaps at her. My daughter is 5 but has been around small animals her entire life and is very gentle. She is not allowed to pick Pixie up while standing and certainly no walking around with her- but she IS allowed to sit on the floor and hold/pet her, or have Pixie sit with her on her lap on the couch. I think it's important to note that when I am right next to them, she doesn't do it that much. She will play tug of war and chase a ball with my daughter, but anything other than that she gets nasty. I'm very surprised that this is happening with a puppy, not a full grown dog! But that makes me think it also might be easier to nip this behavior in the bud, so to speak. When she does this, I yell at her- how should I be handling this to put a stop to this behavior??? Please help!!! |
I would try time outs in a crate or a bathroom, with firm no's instead of yelling. Every single time, a firm no and an immediate time out for the pup. Consistency is critical. I also would only have kiddo play with the pup when you are right there for now. I have read countless times that yorkies are not good with young kids (under 8ish). Many breeders actually will not sell a yorkie to a family with a small child. Since you already have the two together, you can likely get her to at least tolerate and not hurt the 5 year old. |
Check out Caesar, the dog whisperer. Good luck. |
If Pixie is an energetic puppy, part of the problem might be that she feels "trapped" when your daughter holds her. This happens with adults too, when a puppy would rather be free. This is not to say that aggression is ever acceptable, but observe the interaction to see if this might be the root of the problem. Even with my adult Yorkies, I believe one of the reasons they are so affectionate is that they know they are always free to leave my lap or my embrace when they choose. I believe Yorkie puppies tend to be even more feisty because of all of the puppy energy. When Pixie acts up, I would tell her "settle down" or some other command. Teach your daughter to let Pixie leave her and to save holding for later when the puppy is calmer, tired out, ready to accept holding. |
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Another thing that helps, if you aren't already doing this, have your daughter help train Pixie to do tricks like sit, down, stay, shake hands. When my boys get rambunctious with each other, I break it up with a command and then we do tricks for treats -- a kibble for each trick performed. This helps build a positive bond for good behavior too. Good luck! |
Maximo, you are just so danged smart and logical and helpful with your excellent advice and then also explaining the reason as to why one thing or the other works; I love learning from you! |
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I also think if the puppy is so young, maybe give it some time. My puppy took over a year to get used to my fiance's dad. Scottie was so scared of him, not because his dad hurt him or anything (he actually wanted to play with Scottie everytime by just saying hello or giving him a little whistle), but Scottie seemed to be afraid of most men. Anyway, after one year, he finally realized he's not a threat and they play together. I've also noticed that Scottie is afraid of babies/kids when we walk on the street. I think it kind of boils down to what they don't know that they're afraid of. Give them time, be in the same room as the puppy and child, limit their interaction if it gets bad, and use the firm "no"s as others advised. Merry Christmas!!! |
I agree, great advice. When Mia barks like crazy, my husband will yell at her. I remind him that to her all she's hearing is Bark bark bark, like he's joining in. I can say No Bark in a firm but calm voice, now "shhh" is starting to work. I do disagree with time outs - only because dogs have no concept of time out. They're not learning to correct bad behavior if you just remove them. They need some involvement in changing their behavior. Yep, I'm a Cesar watcher and lover! |
I can not give any advise that would be helpful in this particular example....I always try "avoidance"....I try to avoid getting into situations that necessitate corrective behavior to avoid injury to dog or child....this is why I will not sell a puppy to anyone with a child under 7-8 years old. I think the older the child is, the larger the child is, the more coordinated the child is, and the better the chance is the Yorkie will do better with a child. Children adore puppies and just want to interact with them....love on them, hold them, kiss on them, and I can just imagine a yortkie that feels like it is being restricted by this small being, will have an inclination to snap or bite, maybe catching the child in the face (God forbid!!!)....all of which can start issues in the relationship between the child and dogs, or the Yorkie and children....I just practice avoidance....I avoid selling a puppy to families with small children.... I had a precious little yorkie, she adored everyone, babies and children and other animals....and then I noticed when the kids got off the school bus at the corner, and walked past my fenced in yard, if Aija was outside with me, she would try to visit thru the fence with the kids, never barking, just trying to see them and visit thru the cracks in between the fence slats....and then the kids discovered it was a lot of fun to torment the little dog thru the fence, and even as I avoided any interaction with these children thru the fence with Aija, she quickly developed an intolerance to children, and my adorable precious little dog that loved every body, developed an intense hatred towards children.... I say this simply because, while you certainly do not allow your child to torment your pup, the pup is reacting to something associated to a child....are there OTHER children that have close contact with the dog, children that could be doing anything that illicits this negative response towards children from your yorkie? My cousin's grandchild "loved" my yorkies to death......she would sit on the floor with the dog in her lap.....and when no one was looking, she would pinch the tips of their ears between her fingers, to make them yelp. I hope you are able to work this out between your child and your pup.....you are going to have many years of distress between these two......just please be very cautious so your child does not get bitten..... |
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I don't sell to families with children under about 10 years old and I have to meet the children. If they are out of control they do not get a pup and many are out of control even in my home. Which is a good thing I am already warned then. Yorkies for the most part do not like young children. It seems to be their nature with very few exceptions. Usually at over 6 months of age the personality of the dog starts to come out. I often will recommend other breeds for people wanting a Yorkie that have small children suggest they wait, get something else and then maybe the next dog in their life when the kids are old or grown and gone then get a Yorkie. I also found couples with adult children who have young grandchildren visiting them a lot or minding them when parents are at work doesn't work for a yorkie either. Occasional visiting by small children can be managed. Yes Yorkies are tyrants that is part of their nature. Know what you are getting before you purchase. Not all breeders do any amount of screening. |
I have problems with Ruger and small children. I think it's because the kids in the neighborhood tortured him with their bicycles when he was small. He's a lot better now, especially with the kids who didn't torture him. I would let your daughter feed your pup small treats with an open hand, maybe incorporating some training, sit, stay, etc. I scold Ruger by grabbing him by the scruff of the neck and gently shaking him. I think in a short time your pup will see your daughter as the horn of plenty and not a threat. Keep us posted. |
I am very grateful to have Lilah as I have young children and recognize that may have inhibited my ability to have her. I worked very hard to ensure she would be safe and healthy in our home and well adjusted with the kids. One reason that of small breeds I chose the Yorkshire terrier is because of their bold spirit and personality, a weaker constitution would not enjoy the bubbling energy of my household. That said, lilah was a long planned family addition. I had her dog house a year before I had her and I had the opportunity to care for another adult yorkie of a family friend for a month and experience that before I ever committed to Lilah. We had an ex pen with her two story princess palace settled in right next to my bed (which is in the main room actually) for at least a month before she came home. Snuggle den on the bottom floor, food and water on the top, room for a potty pad (we knew we would be pad training), her dog dresser, and a safe secure fence for her. If those boys so much as bumped that fence they were corrected quickly, they had a month before there was a pup in it to figure out how not to do that and oh boy did they figure out how not to bump mommys fence. We also made sure we had baby gates. The kids were not allowed to pick up my dog, heck- I actually had to tell adult friends who could not seem to understand the safety rules (she is not a cat!) that they were no longer allowed to pick up my dog either. It is hard to reprimand thirty something's but not as hard as having my baby hurt. We transitioned really slowly. When she was about a year and a half we finally took the ex pen down even when I was gone at work. Lilah is my dog, not their dog, not anybody else's dog. Everyone loves her, they respect her and treat her well- sitting on the floor and play with a rag monkey, excited greetings after school but she is my shadow, my obedient devotee, my dog. Her spot is with me and she lives under my feet. Any other interactions are by my grace with my directed rules and supervision- and yes, that applies to adults. You would be amazed at how careless and inconsiderate some adults are. My children have tended the most fragile just hatched baby chickens, tended baby bunnies and kittens and sheep and goAts and I think they are much more considerate and aware than many careless adults. That said, they are children and must be educated, supervised and disciplined- which is to be taught. Lilah adores my children and they adore her but it was molded carefully and slowly with a lot of planning and a lot of supervision. Watch very very carefully to see what your daughter may be doing that is subtle and you don't realize. Gentle hands is a great word to use. I don't think a relationship with children is impossible, I actually think it is deeply important to emotional and social development and well being of a dog, but remember that you owe that dog, that little life, the best, safest socialization. Anything short of that will be a disservice to your pup and your child and could truly ruin any opportunity for long term healthy relationships with kids. They are bold, they are tough but they are tiny and petite and need us to protect them. If she doesn't have an emotionally safe space to retreat to, I would amend that quickly. She needs to know she is secure and safe and that you have her back no matter what. |
Wow, Lilah Charm, awesome post!! |
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Alyssa one ofthe best posts I have ever read on here about kids n Yorkies. My two cents worth. I think it is very hard to condition long term dogs to kids if you don' t have children in the home. Magic my big male when he was a young dog did very very well with children - until we started to go to leash free parks partiularly Cherry Beach - after swimming and romping around I would grab lunch from the sidewalk cart and leash him up to the picnic bench. Then youngis h kids 6yrs old or more used to run by screaming and hands waving - and he would roar at them. That just incited the kids on! They took turns doing this. I shortly thereafter never ate lunch there. I had tried to remonstrate with the kids even talked to their parents - but hey my kids can do no wrong - it is your dog that is at fault! Urgha and more expletives were thought by me. When we have kids visit - they are seated and our dogs come out one by one on short lead. The dogs are told to sit and stay and the child is instructed how to pat the dog. Even today when a friend of Judy's came over for supper - she is developmentally delayed and uses a cane - especially with Dara - she was asked to remain seated. After dinner she got up and Dara came over and sat pretty but Phyllis was talking in an excited tone and Dara is an excitable gal and I don't trust her not to leap up and inadvertently knock into her. So I asked Phyllis to tone down her voice and just talk very gently and very calmly to her. Phyllis did that and then I called Dara over and rewarded her for being a very good girl. There is always an awareness we dog owners need to have all the time - most especially with strangers, with the young or old or the infirm most especially. In terms if this poster you have gotten lots of good advice already - I do agree with a safe place for your pup, always supervised interactions. Obedience training for the pup and training for your child. At three years old i would not have the child feed the dog at all. In fact I train my dogs not to take food from childrens hands. |
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:thumbup::thumbup::thumbup::thumbup::thumbup: I agree on all counts....maybe I should raise MY cut-off age! I have to say, thinking back over the years, I can honestly say I can actually count on one hand the number of families I have sold Yorkies to...meet and greet and applications make evident any children....most of my families are adults that have empty nest syndrome and were looking for "another little baby to love and nurture"....and I have sold to "young" seniors that are lost without a housefull of children running around....I have had several 80 year olds ask about owning a yorkie....then you are on the other end of the scale, wondering who will care for this yorkie in the event this owner can no longer care for the pup.....we sign extra papers and family get involved with a "return to breeder" in the event the owner is unable to care for her pup any longer....I just could not deprive a clear thinking, active, loving, caring, senior adult the joys of owning one of these babies just because they are seniors....I do sell the larger pups to my seniors as they dont have the problem of tripping over a tiny little dog of 4-5 lbs. |
I am really divided about whether Yorkies do or do not like children. I know many breeders sell to young families and also some have young families of their own. 'they have not discussed problem placements at least with me. Razzle likes children but he does not have many opportunities to be with very young children. I know with my large breed I don't like to sell to families with young children. Unless I am truly convinced that the parents are committed to obedience training will NOT let the child take the dog out for a walk un supervised etc etc. |
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Great post. |
Nooo, not at all; it's quite brilliant! I appreciated every single detail. |
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I think that the only way it can work is if the parents teach the children to allow the pup to come when he/she wants to...not when the children want him/her to. Some will never be lovey dovey and cuddly and that is usually what young children want. IMO the OP should not encourage any holding at all until the pup expresses a desire for it which honestly may not happen. And, no disrespect to anyone on this forum, but please please don't listen to any advice from Cesar Milan for training a yorkie. Yorkies need and respond to positive reinforcement. I recommend reading "The Loved Dog" by Tamar Gellar. |
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Instead of Cesar and his approach to training, I highly recommend Tamar Gellar 's book " The Loved Dog" or even Victoria Stillwell. I believe in positive reinforcement. I find Cesar to be a bit too hostile for my liking and too rigid and controlling. I have successfully turned a couple of pups around from being out of control Cujo types to sweet pups using time outs and also just simple patience and understanding. Cesar would have been in their faces and rolling them on their backs telling them who is boss. In my opinion it is just not the thing to do...it only serves to scare them more. Most pups who bite are scared...it is a rare one who is simply mean or crazy. .. my opinion of course. :D I saw this the other day on Facebook and plan to read the book being referenced: https://www.thedodo.com/dog-training...196140697.html |
when we were training ours, we would put her on the harness and leash and have my children, (from ages 7-15) gently walk her around the kitchen and also reinforce her commands (like sit) and give her a small treat. She seemed to respect that and enjoy it. I have heard it is not uncommon though for some yorkies to not love being with all small children, so it might just take time and patience. The yorkie rescue in our area doesn't like to let families with children under 8 adopt. I think you have received much good advice and this is just something that worked for us :) |
Just another note-of my four children, it seemed to take Ella longer to bond with my ten year old. He is extremely gentle and loving, but she just seemed to not prefer him, rather then force it, they just bonded over time-maybe six months. We find that with him, in particular, she brings him her toy and likes to do fetch rather then cuddle most of the time. It makes no sense to me bc he is an extra gentle child, but it works for them-and she really has her own special "thing" with each of them. Sometimes, with their training and your patience, they will bond. |
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it is SO true Jkpal! There were times when my 10 year old would feel sad and we would just explain they would hopefully have a stronger bond, but they are living creatures and we cannot just "will it" to happen. |
Thank you to everyone for your awesome responses! Thankfully after some correction we have had no other issues. It seems to have been a combination of her figuring out her place in the "pack" and possibly feeling restricted when being held. The next time this happened, I gave a firm "NO" and put her in the kitchen behind the gate. (I didn't want her to associate her crate with anything negative so I left that out of it.) Then talked to my daughter about the importance of a looser hold. It took about 4 "NOs" and that was that. Thank goodness!!! As far as yorkies and children...I had read both (good/bad with kids) before purchasing her. I spoke with a mom at my daughters school whose Yorkie adores her children and also spoke with my vet, who knows my kids...she advised that as my kids were experienced with pets large and small and weren't crazy, hyperactive hellions, they should be able to exist in harmony with the puppy. I did not believe that I went into this blindly... I am so grateful to have this forum in which to seek advice/opinions! Pixie is going to start an obedience classes soon and gets along so well with my other pups and family members. I could not be more in love with her! Thanks again to all who replied!!! 😊 |
You're obviously quite special yourself, what with raising children and yorkies--and doing it well; tell your daughter good job for being such a good big sister to Pixie). So glad all is well in your household..Happy New Year to you and yours!! |
Just an FYI on time outs: When you put a pup in time out it should only be a few minutes. I have never had a pup not want to go in a crate because I put them in one for a time out. I see this mentioned a lot. I have crates in almost every room of my house that my pups go in and out of...and some like to sleep in them. Many of them have experienced time outs in them ... they don't view it as a negative experience at all. I think the only way you can ruin a pup with crating is if they are in it for extended periods such as all day long while owner is at work and then again at bed time....YES, people actually do that. For the life of me I don't understand it, but we get a lot of owner surrenders and also applicants who think that is acceptable. |
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You say you don't want her to associate anything negative with the crate, yet you may be putting her in a position of associating negative with your children. She might respond to your command "no", but chances are she won't be happy and it could backfire. I could be wrong...it is simply my opinion. My granchildren know to pet my pups, but they do not hold them when sitting or standing. They can have the pup lie next to them and pet them...but no snuggling. I don't want my pups to bite them and it can and does happen with yorkies. |
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