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I don't think I'll win this argument So, Jimmy is about 5 1/2 months old. He loves people and children and all that but Sunday my GF wants to bring him to her sisters house. There is going to be a ton of people there, a few kids and all that. I'm not super comfy about the whole thing! There is just way too many people walking around in the house for me to feel comfy with him walking in the house. Plus, the 5 year old always wants to hold him! Here is the catch....I actually got Jimmy for my GF as a present so I don't have a lot to say about it. (Even though I take him out, feed him, pay the vet bills, buy his clothes, clean his poop and pee and do everything a Mom would do) She is super eager to show the puppy to her Mom who has been seeing him on Facebook since end of October. I really don't know what I can say to convince her it's not a good idea to bring him to the house. I have a bad feeling someone will step on him and finding a vet on Christmas day will not be very easy... I'm almost tempted to play like I am sick so I can stay home but she would probably just take him with her and leave me home :( Not sure what to say! Ideas? |
I'm no relationship expert (though I am in one) and I think the best thing you can do is be honest with your GF about how you feel regarding the whole situation. You aren't doing anything to be mean. You're simply looking out for the well being of your precious pet, which is the right thing to do. That shouldn't be looked down upon. If anything, I would suggest possibly having your GF's mom come by your place later on after the day's events (if distance is doable). This way she can still see the dog in a safe, controlled setting. Hope it all works out for you! |
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Tell her how you feel. In fact, print out what you just typed and show it too her. If you state that you're worried about the dog's safety, I know she'd understand. You could compromise. Take your GF and get really, really cute Christmas photos of you all so you guys can show him off at the Christmas party. And if anyone asks why the pup's not there, explain exactly what you said. He's a little guy that could get hurt easily, and all the people around would be alot of stress for him. |
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Thats a great idea :thumbup: |
Do you have a crate for him? If she absolutely must take him (which I advise against), then why not at least make sure he will be safe when he is there. I would never let a child hold one of my dogs. I would bring the crate along with me - so Mom gets to see the new dog, but it would be "hands off" and he would be kept safe in his crate. |
Me and my DH are planning on bringing Lola to his family's big crazy xmas party on Christmas Eve because right afterwards we are going to my parents for the night and all of xmas day. We have already layed down the rules with the kids that Lola is off limits(unless they are sitting on the floor and we are there to supervise) and we(me and my DH) will be holding her or she will be in her crate(we have a colapsable one) in a closed bedroom if the family starts to get overwhelming for her. Fortunatly for us Lola loves people as much as she loves dogs so she has not had any problems being around groups of people in the past. Hopefully this will work for us, and good luck to you! I know being in a relationship means compromise and hoepfully you will be able to find some middle ground:) |
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I am right there with you all and I have said the same thing. The funny thing is at first she told her Mom that she wasn't going to bring him (3 weeks ago). Then a few days ago I said "Yeah, I don't think it's a good idea to bring him, sounds like there is going to be way too many people." she got a bit upset and said "What do you mean, my Mom wants to see him!" Oi! I can't win for losing, lol. I'm going to keep stressing that I'm not comfortable with it and for those exact reasons. I didn't say anything about him maybe getting hurt, I just said I think it would be too much for him. I even tried to get her to bring him to her Moms a couple of weekends ago when we were sitting the kids, she didn't want to go. Plus, Jimmy is a squirmer when someone picks him up sometimes. He wiggles and wiggles....I almost think he will get dropped on his head :( Her Mom lives about 45 minutes away, which isn't bad....she just never wants to go over there and I don't know why :/ Thanks for the advice so far :) I didn't think I was being selfish! You all have shown me that I am not. |
Can you take a play pen and put him in it? |
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This just may make me buy one. |
You sound like a good loving protective yorkie daddy to me |
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Yes, that's true. And, yes, I do consider myself a good mommy :) |
I'm not sure how old Jimmy is. He looks young on your avatar. Has he had all of his vaccinations yet? If not, I would not take him around that many ppl and risk him catching something yet. Also, we had a member here (another great yorkie-loving guy!) who had his little boy's leg broken by accident by a family member. They are just so fragile, especially when little. It is good to hear from another male yorkie-lover. My husband fell in love w these little ones years ago when he met me (before that, poor guy thought he was a lab guy!). He also takes very good care of these little ones. When he takes one of our little ones around friends/relatives, they stay in his arms the whole time. Even though they are full grown, he is afraid to put them down. If she has her heart set on taking him, I would also suggest a playpen to keep him safe. You sound like a smart guy. I'm sure you'll figure out a tactful way to handle it w GF. My husband can be pretty smooth when trying to get me to change my mind w things. |
Yup, he has all his shots and all that. I am worried about someone stepping on him the most. Thanks for the kudos, although I'm pretty tough, I'm just a girl. Sorry, I know it's confusing whey I put GF, I should just use friend (even though she is my girlfriend) :) It's going to be super tough to convince her so I think I'll just take the initiative and just grab a play pen and lock it up so the kids don't open it. Last time we were at her sisters house poor little Jimmy fell in the pool...I almost had a heart attack! |
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It would explain your intelligence, insight and sensitivity, you're one of us! ;) (Sorry guys for my female chauvinism.) On the topic, though, I think you're right about the playpen thing. These dogs are so tiny and easily stepped on. |
You could always say he isn't potty trained yet as an excuse to keep him close by under your supervision. If he absolutely must come with keep him leashed to your side when he is out being introduced, then when he is tuckered out put hum in his crate and behind closed doors. Let the kids know that he doesn't like to be picked up, and tell the adults if they or their kids pick him up and he wriggles out of their arms and hurts himself they are footing the bills, emphasize that a broken let can cost $1k easy. More if they need surgery to fix the way the bone set. That should be enough to keep him safe from being picked up, but keeping him at your side willbe safest, he'll b less likely to be picked up or stepped on. Good luck l, hope you have a happy Christmas! |
If you must go I would agree take a crate. However, I know that a lot of people will want to hold him which may not be a good idea. The children will want to hold him too. Some folks will be offended and make comments when you suggest that they not hold him so much. You are in a difficult situation. I wish you the best. Too bad you didn't take him to visit her mom earlier. Some people aren't understanding that pets have feelings and shouldn't be handled 24/7. He is small and cute, so expect a lot of handling. |
I would now want to take him either. Especially with a young one there that wants to pick him up. If the child picked him up wrong when no one was watching it could be an injury. Your girl friend wants to show off her dog which is understandable but a large gathering might not be the best place to display a little puppy for the first time. If she won't listen to you I would suggest that you be there to watch over the little guy 24/7. Don't let him wander unattended. It may be dangerous and it may interrupt his potty training as well. |
What about putting him in a sling, or stroller, so you could carry him around? That way he is not running around on the floor but people can see him. I also use the stroller when I take my two where there are a lot of people. They are harnessed in and off the floor and if it gets to be too much, I will zip them up and say they need to rest for a while :D |
I would set some rules from the get go,,,they are to precious to take a chance on someone hurting them..I know you will watch out for your baby but it could be a stressful day. You have heard some good advice here and I agree with them..Good luck and Merry Christmas |
An expen can be purchased at Petsmart or Petco if it is in the budget. A babys "pac n Play" works well too Walmart and Target about $40. We had a house full of 20 last Sunday and I was a nervous wreck. My kids (all six) were kind enough to hold my baby up off the floor most of the time if I was busy. They were so sweet to do this so I wouldnt have to worry as much. I did put my baby in her crate in another room while we were eating. Good luck! |
I would deff let your GF know how you feel & your fears as you are rite to feel the way that you do. I would also recommend that if you take the pup that you keep it in a crate & if ANYONE else holds your pup that they be sitting down. There is another YT member who took their pup to visit relatives & an adult was holding the pup, the pup jumped out of the guys hands & broke it's leg. If she insists on taking the pup then it is deff time for you to purchase that crate. FYI- Walmart has crates for reasonable prices. |
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They do come in handy, on more occasions than just this one! And I think you'd make a wonderful 'Manny' !!! ;) Sally + Harry x |
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So instead please read - and I think you'd make a wonderful 'Nanny' !!! x |
I was also going to suggest a playpen. It's portable, easy to set up, and a five year old shouldn't be tall enough to reach in and grab. Also if baby's not in the pen, keep him on a leash at all times. That might make it easier to keep him from getting stepped on. And if anyone questions the leash, just tell them he's not all the way potty trained, as someone else suggested. You don't want to risk any accidents ruining the rugs in Mom's house. |
IMHO, it's not about anybody winning the argument, it's about what's best for the puppy. I see a number of possible compromises here: 1. Visit Mom on Xmas Eve when things are quieter. 2. Go earlier on Xmas Day and leave before the crowds arrive. 3. Take two cars and you go home early with the pup. (where I live, 45 minutes is 'around the corner') 4. You stay home with the little one. We certainly dont want to turn Xmas into a power play or a battle ground, and partners need to come to a mutually acceptable agreement regarding what's good for the pup. My partner and I agree on EVERYTHING regarding Smokey's welfare and happiness. If not, then we do it MY WAY. :>)~ |
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