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-   -   Help... Now Oliver bit my boyfriend (https://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/general-yorkshire-terrier-discussion/227412-help-now-oliver-bit-my-boyfriend.html)

kkephart 05-08-2011 07:07 AM

Thanks for the Happy Mothers Day... It is my first!! YAY

megansmomma 05-08-2011 07:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kkephart (Post 3528639)
Thank you so much for all of your support. I've been thinking about it and I want to do what is best for Oliver. He has had a tough little life in puppy mills... so he obviously is going to have trust issues. Unless the BF is willing to work with Oliver and I on this then he will have to go. Plus.. I know Oliver was scared... he grabbed him from behind... plus this was the first time the BF was staying in OUR home. Plus the words he was using were uncaring and insensitive to say the least... not a good sign.

Wow I think this says it all. :thumbup: He might be more fearful of men from his puppymill past too. :(

BTW~if Oliver is from a mill and still peeing inside the house you need to get him bellybands. Otherwise, he will continue to pee inside.

gidget529 05-08-2011 07:48 AM

Hope you have a wonderful Mother's Day!! It sounds like Oliver found one good mommy!! (I guess Oliver should be celebrating today, too!)

Lil Sis 05-08-2011 07:58 AM

I agree that your bf should learn about dogs.. your a good mother but he needs to learn how to handle dogs.

I am sure you pup bit him because he was scared...

If I repeated what someone else said.. Im sorry...

And of course I wish you luck!!

Shinja

Sunnie 05-08-2011 12:24 PM

OK so I am going to probably get negativity from this, but I do not agree with everyone else. I do not know if your BF was rough with Oliver and I hope he was NOT, but the important thing is that it is NEVER ok for them to bite. Yes, he had a rough life, and yes he needs time to adjust.. but blaming it on the BF is unfair. And honestly, BF is correct if he blamed it on you (who trains him). YOU are the one responsible to teach him not to bite. As much as you do not want to discipline him, it is doing him a disservice if you do not correct him. I would sit down with the BF and talk to him about being more patient and also about standing by you while you are training Oliver. It is so much easier to work together than to battle about it. Poor baby is probably already so confused and everyone needs to work together patiently to help him over come these issues.

Taryn0405 05-08-2011 02:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sunnie (Post 3528964)
OK so I am going to probably get negativity from this, but I do not agree with everyone else. I do not know if your BF was rough with Oliver and I hope he was NOT, but the important thing is that it is NEVER ok for them to bite. Yes, he had a rough life, and yes he needs time to adjust.. but blaming it on the BF is unfair. And honestly, BF is correct if he blamed it on you (who trains him). YOU are the one responsible to teach him not to bite. As much as you do not want to discipline him, it is doing him a disservice if you do not correct him. I would sit down with the BF and talk to him about being more patient and also about standing by you while you are training Oliver. It is so much easier to work together than to battle about it. Poor baby is probably already so confused and everyone needs to work together patiently to help him over come these issues.


I don't think anyone was saying that it was acceptable for him to be biting the boyfriend. However, if there's a stranger in a dog's territory and he grabs the dog and startles it from behind, thwen I'm not shocked at all from it's behavior. It's a case of both Oliver and the boyfriend needing to be trained. Oliver not to bite, and the boyfriend to not grab at dogs.


I don't know if it's quite fair to blame the owner for this either. Yes, it is her responsibility to make sure Oliver is not going around biting random people, however common sense tells me that if someone says that they're dog is from
a rescue type situation, I know that not starling it, letting he or she get use to me and my scent, and trying two gain his or her trust would be the foundation of our relationship. Not simply just grabbing at him from behind demanding he shut up.

Training I think needs to be both ways in this case and not simply blamed on the owner.

ArmaniMan 05-08-2011 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Taryn0405 (Post 3529063)
I don't think anyone was saying that it was acceptable for him to be biting the boyfriend. However, if there's a stranger in a dog's territory and he grabs the dog and startles it from behind, thwen I'm not shocked at all from it's behavior. It's a case of both Oliver and the boyfriend needing to be trained. Oliver not to bite, and the boyfriend to not grab at dogs.


I don't know if it's quite fair to blame the owner for this either. Yes, it is her responsibility to make sure Oliver is not going around biting random people, however common sense tells me that if someone says that they're dog is from
a rescue type situation, I know that not starling it, letting he or she get use to me and my scent, and trying two gain his or her trust would be the foundation of our relationship. Not simply just grabbing at him from behind demanding he shut up.

Training I think needs to be both ways in this case and not simply blamed on the owner.

Agreed! No one was advocating for a dog to go around and bite people. However, if someone new came into my house, treated my dog badly, and then grabbed it up from behind- I would expect them to be slightly more understanding if the dog did bite them. EVERY dog has a breaking point, the best behaved dog would bite if put in the right situation. Obviously, the BF found Olivers breaking point.

AlicetheYorkie 05-08-2011 04:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArmaniMan (Post 3529066)
Agreed! No one was advocating for a dog to go around and bite people. However, if someone new came into my house, treated my dog badly, and then grabbed it up from behind- I would expect them to be slightly more understanding if the dog did bite them. EVERY dog has a breaking point, the best behaved dog would bite if put in the right situation. Obviously, the BF found Olivers breaking point.

Well said, I agree. It's definatly NOT ok for a dog to bite anyone, but the thing is also - yes, every dog has it's breaking point and this is a mill rescue, so even more so. None of my dogs bite, ever, but I'd be willing to bet that if someone new came to our house for the first time and startled one of them by grabbing them from behind, they would definatly at least turn around pretty darn quick and possibly snap or growl. Now, if it was myself or dh doing it, that wouldn't happen. The thing is though, no one is going to come into my house and do that to one of my dogs, they just know better, they approach them properly for a "guest" in our home and the dogs then gladly welcome them.:)

OP - I think you need to talk to your bf (if he stays your bf;)), you need to explain to him that Oliver had a very tough life and is still getting used to a normal "dog's life", so he needs to cut him a little slack. Of course, you should definatly correct Oliver, you don't want him to think it's ok to bite whenever he's not happy (I remember your thread about your unexpected room mate, that's not getting any better?:(), but at the same time, the bf needs "correction" too. Stopping Oliver from (peeing on the floor was it?) is YOUR job, not his, it's not his dog and Oliver isn't used to him so he's not going to listen to him anyway. He needs to sit back, make friends with Oliver, and let you handle any training. I think Oliver's reaction was normal and although it does need correction, he'll get there with time and consistancy. It definatly is NOT an indication that you are a bad mom or that Oliver is unhappy.

shodanusmc 05-08-2011 04:08 PM

Dump the guy, keep the dogs. Good dogs are harder to find than guys. Now I am a guy and even I believe it!

Sammy Mommy 05-08-2011 04:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saeka (Post 3528386)
Eek! Do not worry, you're a good mommy. Keep working with him and see where it goes, and yes like others said, watch how he reacts with your boyfriend. On one hand, your boyfriend may have startled him and Oliver's reaction was to defend himself, but on the other hand your baby may feel something you don't.

I agree!! You are a good Mommy and are working hard with Oliver.

ArmaniMan 05-08-2011 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shodanusmc (Post 3529193)
Dump the guy, keep the dogs. Good dogs are harder to find than guys. Now I am a guy and even I believe it!

Listen to Steve- he always has the best advice :D

Baroness 05-08-2011 06:02 PM

Sounds to me like Oliver nipped because BF may have done more than grab. Maybe he scared the pee out of your Oliver to make him nip? No one knows but BF and Oliver, and one cannot tell his side. If the BF is worth saving, maybe you could talk to him and get him in on the training with Oliver, make them more comfy with one another. If BF balks at that, I'd say "hit the road, Jack!" That's just me, and I'm cantankerous on good days. ;-)

manina 05-08-2011 06:04 PM

Dogs know when u don't like them
 
If your furbaby hasn't been around your bf much, than he is a stranger to him, and he shouldn't be grabing a dog fr behind. Most dog jump when u pull or grab them fr behind, and if they don't know u they will bite. So would I Lol !!!! :D
So u can't blame the dog and ur bf should try to get alone with the furbaby first, he needs to make peace with the dog , and than help u train him not to pee in the house.


good Luck !!!

bark@ulater!!!
manina,mileyand max

kkephart 05-08-2011 07:41 PM

I totally agree that it is my responsibility to train Oliver.... that was the reason for my original post. Maybe all 3 were at fault... Me, Oliver, and the BF. I would never be okay with Oliver biting ANYONE.. I was just trying to explain the situation in which it happened. I've had Oliver since the end of January and at the beginning I never heard a peep from him. Now he is getting comfortable in his own skin... which I LOVE... but being protective is one of those things. SO what do I do when he growls and barks at him? I've been firmly saying NO and I place him on the floor and ignore him. I do feel like he has been abused by men in his past and the BF is 6'3 ... so maybe I am babying him but I do think he was scared. The bottom line is... I want to do what is best for Oliver... because thats what he deserves! Thanks for all the help!!

kkephart 05-08-2011 07:44 PM

Oh and the BF has agreed to working with Oliver in some training sessions... good sign... but again my Oliver is the most important and maybe hes telling his mommy this guy isnt the one!!!:D


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