This sounds like one depressed doggie begging for a little bit of affection. If you and your boyfriend refuse to let him come up to you, then YOU need to go down to him. It's not at all fair to him for you to withdraw your affection because of someone else coming in to your relationship.

Find other ways of spending time with him. Walking, playing games, agility training. Anything where he has your undivided attention and his little furbutt gets worn out.

My thoughts exactly!

I replied earlier before reading through the entire thread.....OH MY GOODNESS, LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS!! :lol tears:sidesplt::notworthy

I read the original post differently. I think this is what she said:


- Her bf moved in last September (10 months ago). The bf brought in his dog, and the rules changed about being on furniture and sleeping in the bed. Bailey was fine.

- They got a cat in December (7 months ago). Bailey loves the cat.

- 2 months ago, Bailey started getting very clingy.


So I don't think it's the rule change... to the OP, I would look for other possible changes. Maybe you're right that it's the heater. Possibly he's cold??

Some other thoughts:

- while it's great to walk with your dog, it's not necessarily the best way to really tire your dog out. I'd suggest playing 15-30 minutes of fetch with him per day, indoors or out, and see if that helps.

- Is he possibly developing separation anxiety? Do you ever leave him alone by himself? How does he react?

- I would say it's okay to ignore the whining, but if you're going to do that, you have to COMMIT. If you have been letting him whine for ~ten minutes, and then picking him up, you've taught him he needs to whine for at least ten minutes to get your attention.

- If you do give him a "time out", can he see you / hear you? It can be very frustrating / anxiety provoking for a dog to see something he wants and not be able to reach it. I'd recommend a timeout in a distant part of the house if possible, or at least throw a blanket over the baby gate so he can't see you.

- Try giving him chews and see if it can pull focus off of you. You can also try training / spending more quality time with you in general. Can you sit on the floor so he can sit on your lap?

- There's a difference between a dog whining for a few minutes or even an hour, and a dog crying all night. If he is truly distressed, ignoring him won't help. You should keep thinking about what may have changed for him, and try different techniques.


Good luck!

hmmm, I thought that Andreas is the BF. I didn't see where he brought a dog. Could be the heater, but to me the biggest issue is that BF and whatever other baggage he brought moved into HER place, not the other way around.

When my DH and I were dating, he was spending a lot of time at my 'place'. I was TDY at a hotel which was going to allow me to move my cat in. This was almost 20yrs ago. I told my DH that I was going to be bringing my cat, his reponse, "animals do not belong in the house, at all!" My reply, meaning it's you or the cat? He said 'could be'. We had been dating awhile and I saw pretty good possibilities, but guess what, I went and got my damn cat. We got married later and have been married 15yrs..now have 2 cats and 4 dogs who live all over the house, and DH is the one in charge of cleaning the litter boxes.

It's YOUR flat, he moved in. YOUR flat, YOUR baby, YOUR rules. Before you get married is when you set the ground rules for the entire future of your relationship. Be very careful what kind of rules you are setting yourself up for if you expect this to go the long haul. You cannot change the rules in the middle of the relationship, so be very careful that if you give up the power, that is actually what you want to do. 10yrs down the road it could come back to bite you.

I have to agree with most...Bailey is begging for attention, so give it to him. Where is the cat when all of this with Bailey is going on? Winston is with us every minute we are home, I don't see a problem with this...he loves us as much as we love him. He eats when we eat, he sleeps when we sleep, he plays when we play and I just love sharing my life with him...what's wrong with that?

Nana 911....your my kind of woman.
this is wisdom coming from an a person who has lived it... to a person who is younger, not stupid. Just at a different time in their life. It's a huge decision and often a very unselfish one... to relinquish a man, one's power, or a beloved pet.

you put that much more succinctly than I did....LOL

When at my house Rizzo is allowed everywhere (except the cat litter box room) he is allowed on my bed, on my couches basically no boundaries. However when at my bf's place we have to respect his rules, because it is his place. He doesn't think dog's should be up on the furniture (I tried to explain that he isn't a dog, he's a Yorkie, but he doesn't get it) But Rizzo caught on quick, so he just plays with the kitty that is there and just ignores us, unless the cat gets somewhere he cant reach, or he is tired and wants to cuddle. Then he just looks at me with his big sad eyes while the cat is tackling him because he want's to come up and cuddle with us. I've tried to win the bf over by holding Rizzo and giving him my big sad puppy dog eyes and Rizz seems to play along just fine by doing the same. I kind of understand, but I explained that my well washed/groomed does far less damage to his couch that his kitten, but he still wasn't having it. I only accept it because it is his house so it is his rules. He comes over to my house he gets to deal with cuddleing with both my pup and my kitty.
If it is your furniture and you dont have an issue with having him up there cuddling, maybe you should talk to your bf and find out why he doesn't want him up there and explain how much better off you guys would be with a happy yorkie in your lap then a sad yorkie whining from the kitchen...jmo

Well i am shocked at some of your replys!!

Lets get one thing right, Bailey gets ALOT of mine and Andreas attention, he has play time and we are always going on lovely long walks with him. I spend most of the night playing with him and giving him LOTS of attention while Andreas spends the day walking him and bonding with him. He gets lots of nice treats and we love bailey more than anything. My bf moved in over a year ago, baileys nose was not pushed out at ALL!!! very upset at your negative comments!

Bailey has NEVER stayed in my bed room even when my bf didnt live with me and bailey has always gone to bed in his own bed! I dont ever lock bailey away and he follows me around the house constantly which i love.

What i am saying tho he is constantly crying non stop of late which he never seemed to do ... just started the last 2months NOT when my bf moved in!

I was asking for any advice to help stop the crying as you cant seriously tell me you think i am wrong for not wanting bailey to cry for my attention 24/7. Yes i have a bf, Yes we dont let bailey jump on the couch no more, but he gets ALOT of attention off me and my bf!

I dont agree that if you let a your dog do something that you cant break the habit, i watch caesar milan do it all the time lol!

I just want to stress the point that just because my bf moved in does not mean baileys has been pushed away and that i dont pay him enough attention because i do.

Hope thats makes sense.

OMG i just read through more of the posts!! How dare you people say such horrible things about my BF!! mY BF loves bailey with all his heart. We both do!!! Bailey gets Alot of attention!!

I am so annoyed at you all right now how dare you all tell me to put my bf behind a dog gate!!! Bailey is with us 24/7 apart from when we sleep (which he has never been in my bed) My bailey is my baby and i have always treated him like my baby... and when my bf moved in he treated him like his baby too. It was a joint choice to try not bailey jump up on us as much and bailey has been fine with that! I let bailey on my lap when i call him up and he often snuggles into me, i just dont like him sleeping on the couch no more only when he is called up.

Yes i have laid down some ground rules in my house because Bailey was being a little naughty and bailey dont like it to much right now, but he will come round.

My bf is lovely to bailey and i think some of your comments about my bf was very uncalled for!

I came on this site asking for help to train my yorkie to stop crying 24/7 non stop if i dont give him ALL my attention... which just aint practical for me to give him attention 24/7!!!!! All i have got is horrible comments about my bf and how i dont give my yorkie enough attention!! Which is not true at all!!

I do not think i will ever be coming back on this site again to get comments like that again!! your responses to me asking for advice was VERY wrong indeed!! Iam so upset!!

It does make sense. You did say something about trying to pen him in the kitchen, where he could still see you (the pack) as sort of punishment to get him to stop crying. I may be wrong but in canine packs it is serious rejection to put one of them outside the inner circle, so to speak. It is the equivalent of being shunned. They hang around outside the circle before they finally leave the pack altogether. Perhaps that is adding to his distress?

Sorry you took the posts as so negative. Speaking for myself I saw BF in, and he wouldn't let Bailey on the couch, Bailey was upset, that is why I assumed it was wholly his idea .... I of course think everyone is supposed to just as eccentric as me and let their pets crawl all over everywhere. And at my advanced age and history of relationships, I see red flags where perhaps there are none, so excuse my jumping the gun.

If Bailey's distress coincides with the removal of the heater as someone else suggested perhaps all that is required is to bring it back... Also, perhaps if Bailey absolutely cannot get on the couch with you, would it be possible if, just until he gets through whatever this phase is you were to grab a pillow a sprawl on the floor with him? You'd have best of both of worlds.

Best of Luck!

I just read your second response, I really think that had you been as informative in your initial post we would not have been so negative as a group. The impression most of got was that he was not allowed on the couch at all, that things had changed dramatically when your bf moved in, to the point of penning him off in the kitchen for punishment. We can only respond to the information given to us.

The last post of yours does make the situation sound much better. He is allowed on the couch to cuddle with you, etc.. He never slept with you before your bf, and that is fine, a lot of people do that, so that was not a negative change. We're sorry you're upset but perhaps you can understand where we were coming from.

Thank you so much for this, this is just what i am saying. My bf moved in a year ago and bailey has just started crying 2months ago after the heater was turned off.

He has never been locked away from us ever only yesterday when i tried to ignore his crying. I have never commited to it before i always ended picking him up when he started to cry, cuddling him which made him think if he crys he gets my attention... and it worked and it has just got worse and worse and now he just crys non stop.

I give him play toys and chews filled with peanut butter and Andreas my bf sits on the floor with him every night and plays games with him. and he does not cry then its just when we sit down to relax he starts crying, he even starts crying when he is on my knee if i stop stroking him.

Its just 24/7 attention seeking!

Thank you for the only person to understand what i ment and not jump on my bf or me for not paying bailey attention! Still very mad and upset at other comments!!

i am sorry you feel hurt by the posts people made. i think people are confused by what you were asking. and might have interpreted incorrectly what you were asking advice on.

i was a little confused by your first post as well.

so you are asking why your dog suddenly wants all your attention?
from reading your first post, it's easy for people to think that it's because of the changes that happened(boyfriend moved in, not allowed on couch). but since you are saying that it's not because of those changes, then you might want to think about what other changes might have taken place recently to make your dog act this way since he never acted like this before.

don't take it personally, i think people were confused by what you are asking and misunderstood the situation. and honestly, i had fun reading your thread. because it's nice to see how spoiled all these yorkies are.

I am sorry if you all misread my first post.

QuickSilver seemed to understand what i was saying tho. Just upset at the remarks about my bf and about me not paying bailey enough attention because i really do.

For the last month i have tried everything to stop him from wanting all this extra attention. Took him for more walks, went on dog training classes to tire him out and played with him for hours of a night. When i sit and play with him it makes him 10 times worse for my attention. I have tried water spray when he cries for attention and i have tried to ignore him. I have tried giving him bones to chew on and even a ball thats drops teats out of its self. Nothing seems to be working and he is just crying non stop of my attention, not my BFs attention just mine. Andreas says he just sleeps when he is there but the moment he hears my car pull up outside he starts to cry, and he just crys non stop unless i have him on my knee stroking him. I cant even eat my tea without him standing looking at me crying

All this just started to happen 2months ago and has got worse! Nothing has changed only the fact the heater has been turned off so he cant lie infront of it and go to sleep no more. He aint cold its been very hot here and i have had the fan on the last few weeks. I dont know what the matter with him is. He is fine when its just him and my BF and he is fone when i have him on my knee stroking him, its ONLY when i stop strocking him (even if he is still on my knee) he starts to cry!

I tired to ignore him and out him out the room when he cries, which i know aint the best thing to do but i am really at a loss i REALLY dont know how to stop him from wanting my attention 24/7 THATS why i came on here asking for peoples help and advice!

I have been in tears over this i really dont know how to stop him from crying ALL the time.

is it a big heater? if it's a small heater, can you try turning it back on for him and see if he is wanting that. (i know it's hot right now, but i mean maybe you can turn it on to see if that's what he is crying for)

i wonder if he is trying to tell you something. a lot of times when milu barks, i would check several things to see if that's why she is barking. sometimes i can't find anything that she might be barking about, i just ignore her and tell her to stop barking. but usually i will find out later what she wanted. so milu really doesn't bark for no reason.

did bailey use to bark so much for no reason? was he a barker? did he bark for attention. if this is unlike him, you really should try to find out why he is doing it. it might be health issue, he might be uncomfortable because of something. or it might be some sort of insecurity. you have new animals now? another cat and another dog right? maybe bailey doesn't feel like sharing you with the bf and the cat and the other dog. you know? milu always interferes me when i pay too much attention to my bunnies.

if milu suddenly have a drastic change in behavior and personality, i would definitely want to make sure her health is ok.

Hi Tasha

I too have a little minx called Lottie who when she does not get her own way tends to cry and moan a little until she gets what she wants!! I try to ignore her when she does it and then the minute she stops, even if it is only for a few secs I click and give her a treat. Or I hide some treats around the room or in the garden and let her hunt around for them this seems to break the cycleof her little moan she iis having and then she usually settles down.
i noticed that you are in Newcastle , I have just driven up past there this weekend as I was down in Hartlepool visitng friends!!:D

She ain't called QUICKsilver for nuthin'....LOL

I'd take Bailey to the vet for a checkup and rule out any physical problems.

Maybe a heating pad, in place of the heater? Maybe one of those cheap chair back massagers that you could lay on the floor with a light blanket on it. You could turn it on low and it could 'rub' Bailey?

Hey! Include me in the carpool of people who misunderstood your original post. And believe me I ALWAYS COME TO THE DEFENCE OF THE YORKIE. Obviously, too quickly. Please don't take it personal. I never jump on anyone. In fact, I felt bad for you too. I didn't want your BF to be mean to you or your Yorkie. I'm sorry. Now that I realize that this is a resent event....I really think this little baby needs a check-up to see if anything is wrong physically. Let's make a deal...if you won't think all Texans are rude. I won't think all BF's need to be kicked to the curb.

and then this......I mean c'mon.. just kidding!!!:D


* a little *

Glad we all understand what you mean now. :)

To me, it sounds like you may have inadvertently created a really bad whining habit. He has learned that whining gets him what he wants. From his perspective, whining is not bad behavior, it's an effective communication technique he has been lucky enough to discover.

As a rule, once a habit like this has been well established, you will have to be really strong about not enforcing it. You should be prepared to let him whine for an hour at a time. *Ignore* him if he gives out a little peep. I wouldn't squirt him, just don't give him attention. If he whines on your lap, immediately put him on the floor and ignore him until he stops whining for, say, 30 seconds. Then you can say "good boy" and pick him back up.

It's just like with kids. If you give in every so often after he has been driving you CRAZY for twenty minutes, the next time he'll whine for forty, because hey, it just might work.

I agree you should probably take him in for a checkup just to rule out anything physical. If you can afford it, you can always bring a trainer to assess it too.

This was my initial thought when I read your thread...this should be on your list of things to do simply to rule out any underlying problem that isn't obvious.

The whining & crying could be symptomatic of a problem Bailey only feels comfortable crying to you about.

Keep us posted...;)

You have to hand it to little Bailey for training you so well. :) Training is always a two way street. He has used negative reinforcement on you very effectively.

Here's my story of reverse training. Thor really likes to be on my lap. I like it when I'm reading or watching tv, but not when I'm working. Occasionally, I sit on the floor while I work. If Thor wants some attention, he will jump on the couch and paw at my shoulder, which is honestly the most ANNOYING THING EVER. It annoys me way more than whining, so much so that I immediately put him on my lap to stop him. Which of course is the worst possible thing to do to discourage the pawing. I have to laugh at how smart Thor is all the times when I don't want him to be.

lol! i love it when milu paws at my shoulder! she doesn't scratch me though, she just taps me on my shoulder, and i think it's hilarious.

With Thor, it's more like he's trying to dig a hole. It is hilarious, in an unbelievably annoying way. :rolleyes:

haha, i agree with you. i dont like it either if it's like that. just taping shoulder gently i dont mind so much. :)

Hmmm... have you ever tried to use the 'tshhh' or the 'two-finger-bite' Cesar Milan uses? Reading all the posts I wonder if you don't (involuntarily) reward the unwanted behaviour and have him given the dominant role in your pack. I know a lot of members here don't like Cesar but I have to admit I've learned a lot by watching his shows and could get rid of quite a few annoying antics...

Totally Agree:thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:
I would never let Anyone come in and start making new rules for Me or my pets. I say maybe you need to rethink the BF if he can't take you for who you are and your pets are a BIG part of who you are then maybe he's not the one for you.

Lilymae before you reply again maybe read ALL of the posts!

Thank you everyone for your more positive replys haha! I think i got a little upset last night when everyone started saying it was my bf because he honestly loves bailey just as much as me.. sometimes more i think lol. We give bailey alot of attention and yes he has learnt that crying gets him more attention. If i didnt care about my yorkie and love him very much do you really think i would be on here looking for help and advice.

He is not ill or anything like that, he went to the vets last week for a check up and i told the vet what he is doing and he also said he is just wanting attention and i need to break the habit.

I am going to carry on ignoring him when he cries. I normally give in and let him sleep on me while i stroke him but its just making him worse to the point i cant even eat my tea lol. What a clever little furbutt he is. The past 2 months he has drove me crazy but last night when i started to ignore him alittle he didnt cry as much ....and at one point he lay on the floor and went to sleep..... HE HAS NEVER DONE THAT IN SUCH A LONG TIME!!!! He will normally only go to sleep in his bed or on me :D So maybe this ignoring his whining is working.