I feel like I'm coming apart here..
 

I just need advice and this is the only place I could think of.

Yesterday I was working and saw my coworker. He asked how I was doing and we started talking. I mentioned Lexi and I started crying AT WORK. I couldn't believe it. He felt bad, hugged me, and quickly changed the subject. He told me "When you love a dog, it becomes a person so of course it's going to hurt".

I really miss my Lexi. My boyfriend does too but I don't want to talk about it to him. I know he's hurting and I don't want to salt any wounds. Since losing her, I am constantly looking up Yorkies.. Reading about puppy mills, breeder's sites, Reviews on breeder's sites, AKC site, and breeders around Chicago.. I noticed people walking their yorkies now. I even calculated how much money per month I have to save to maybe get a male yorkie (no one will replace the girl she was). There's a hole in my heart and I feel so lost on how to fill it..

I guess what I'm trying to say is am I being a little "crazy" here? Should I try to occupy myself with things so I don't think about her as much as I do? Should I even be looking at other potential yorkies even though I've no money to get him? Is this helping me or hurting me? ~sigh~ Sorry.. Like the title, I really don't feel like myself..

I am very sorry for the loss of you little boy. The best advice I can give is be willing to talk about him (even with you bf)
I lost my DH 7 years ago and I remarried 1 year ago. My first husband and father to my 3 oldest children is a open topic in our home. Time helps heal but we never forget and should not try to IMO.
We can not dwell on the past (never forget it) but we must live for the future.

There is no right answer. Some people need time, others heal faster by opening their homes and hearts right away to another pet.

Have you considered rescuing a Yorkie that needs a home?

Awww, I am so sorry for your loss. I think the feelings you are going through are perfectly normal. I know you described perfectly well what I too felt when I experienced the loss of my little Maui. When it is time, and you are ready for another you will know it. If you are crazy for feeling this way, you are in good company with me! Hugs to you!!

She was the first dog I ever got to really meet and take care of. I think about her so much.. :( I just want to know if the stuff I'm doing now is helping or hurting me..

I've considered rescuing one but it's hard to find one in Chicago.. Plus I am so afraid if his/her vet bills are out of my range money-wise. I don't want to put her/him through more trouble.. :(

The only thing I talked about to my boyfriend was maybe getting a puppy when we start living together. You know, so it'll give us both some time and we can both be there for him.

I am so sorry for your loss. Since you are considering another yorkie, have you seen this post for a male needing to be rehomed?

http://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/yor...ie-bailey.html

Many people heal with another pet :)

Of course you will never forget your baby but it does help tremendously.

Good luck on your search!!

I'm afraid a thousand dollars is too much for me.. :( Plus I live so far away from him.

[QUOTE=Maximo;3144922]There is no right answer. Some people need time, others heal faster by opening their homes and hearts right away to another pet.

I agree.

When I lost Isabel (she has been gone for 13 months) I was completely lost. I had a hard time deciding whether or not to get another yorkie, because I knew i could never replace her. I brought Addyson home 3 months later and it was the best decision for me. Althought you can never replace another... the new one helped to fill the giant hole in my heart. I still pray everyday that a miracle will happen and Isabel will come home.

[quote=Jilleen;3144943]My brother's girlfriend suggested getting another.. She said when her pug was missing, she was prepared to get another. Her pug came back. For me, I feel bad.. Like it's wrong.. Maybe I should wait a little longer? Until me and my boyfriend are really ready? I want this to be mutual for me and my boyfriend. I want him to be ready too. I feel so conflicted.. I THINK I'm ready.. but maybe my boyfriend isn't.

[quote=nikkipoop;3144945]After he sees that cute lil' face he won't be able to say no. A good boyfriend thinks about you first.

I am so very sorry for your loss. Sending healing hugs and prayers your way. People grieve in different ways, some need to fill the hole immediately, others like me took a long time to heal enough to even think about getting another yorkie. I do suggest that you open up and talk with your bf about the loss -- if you posted the circumstance surrounding the loss, I missed it. You are 100% right, you will never ever be able to replace your little Lexi, but another bit of fluff-love and puppy kisses will help you to laugh and laughter will help heal the hole in your heart.

again.... :hug: and :hands: headed your way

[quote=TwoforFun;3144947]Believe me, Jon (bf) is the sweetest man in the world.. :love: But he's had Lexi for 8 years, I only had the opportunity of being with her for close to 2 years.. That's why I'm afraid he might not be ready to open his heart to another yorkie.. I would never want to rush Jon into something.


CONFLICTED!! :confused: :confused: :confused:

[quote=nikkipoop;3144958]I didn't know the story I'm sorry.
Well it was mainly his dog even if you were attach to her. Now it's time for you to get your dog and for him to get attach to him. I'm just typing away right now, lol.
On a serious note, I wouln't rush just browse around shelters. You will eventually meet up with your next pal even if it's not right now. If your not financially stable and want to close a gap why not volunteer at a shelter. Just to keep yourself occupied. Just ideas.

I understand your concerns, but keep your eyes open. There are healthy, young Yorkies -- not necessarily puppies -- that come along who need homes. Earlier this year, I came across 2 gorgeous, healthy boys, 1 year old, that the rescue was asking only $300 for the pair. Sure, their genetic history was not available, so there would be some risk. The only reason I passed on taking them was I only wanted 1 dog.

Your other option, if you decide with your bf that you want a dog again, is to start talking with good breeders/exhibitors. They often hold puppies until they are older and then decide that they should go to pet homes. You can find some great deals on beautiful, healthy Yorkies that way.

Thank you.. This is all very useful info.. :) I just need to find some breeders around Chicago.. Which scares me just because I find every breeder suspicious. Maybe I should find other yorkie owners around my area? Not to buy right away, just to keep in touch with..

First of all, you will NEVER be able to replace Lexi. NEVER. So you don't even try.

You find another pup.

Nothing helps fill the hole in your heart, or removes the tears from your cheeks, better or faster than a new pup. The pup needs a home and you need a pup. The pup will not take the place of Lexi - no one or nothing will - but your heart will expand to welcome and make room for the new pup.

It will be the best thing you do. If you really love animals, you can't walk away from a pup. Your heart will warm, your arms will open, and smiles (and even laughter!) will return to your home.

The new pup is not a replacement: it's an addition.

This is me...just me...never rush to get another dog...because as other people have said you can't replace Lexi and I have seen people rush out and then compare all the time. I could see they never really bonded with the new dog either...I think of my little ones as human so I would never rush out to get a love one that has passed. In your heart you will know when you can see a new puppy as that new dog and not as Lexi...

Remember this is just me and I have always had more than one so it makes a difference when you have other little ones to take your pain away..

Thank you for the advice. I really really appreciate it..

There is no right or wrong way to grieve. If looking up things on the internet makes YOU feel good while you are doing it, then do it. If not, stop.

When you and your boyfriend are both ready to bring another dog in to your home, you can find young yorkies that need rehoming on petfinder.com. Depending on the rescue, the fees may range from $50 up to a couple of hundred dollars. I know some rescues go directly to breeders and get the puppies that have become "too old" to sell to pet stores (usually around 4 months of age...)

You will know...Hugs for you and your loss...I know how much it hurts and society can be cruel about "its just a dog"...no, it is more than that...it is part of your soul...but one day the hurt will go away and you will remember her with only smiles...

Grieve, be open for a new furbaby, since I lost Fizz this week, I have looked at all sites for Yorkies too...it has been part of my healing. It will surly be a while. The next dog will be an individual...not a replacement. When it is rightyou will know. That is how it was as a kid, and we finally had a dog follow my brother home about 6 months after we lost Mitzie. Mom and my brothers loved her , not a a replacement, just as a new family member. I never knew that Dog as I had gone into the military...but she was part of the family at home.

I am so very sorry for your loss..and the pain you are in.
I lost my 'Woody' earlier this month. He would have been 13 this month. Me nor my daughter could go to work or school that day. It was horrible...just horrible.

I think when I got Thomas I had Woody in the back of my mind. His age..etc..knowing he didn't have many years left..

Thomas has not taken the place of Woody..he never will. But I do think he has helped a lot with the healing.

I hope your heart starts to heal soon..and you find a special baby to give all of that love to. :animal-pa

Lots of yorkies on petfinder in Chicago maybe there is something there and it wouldn't be to much money.
I lost a dog in Feb and I got Cooper right after that. I thought it was to soon but my sister talked me in to it and he has been the best for healing. Cooper has licked many of my tears and has taken over my heart.

I've looked through petfinder and Chicago classified. I was actually tempted to see some lady who had 4 pups, but she never called back for a visit.. Which is totally understandable since I don't have the money.. :rolleyes:

Look at this little girl owner had to many dogs sad:(
Adoptable Yorkshire Terrier Yorkie: POLLY- 2yrs. Old: Petfinder
only 2 yrs old

So sorry about your loss! It's ok to be sad, we as mere humans can't help but be sad when part of our family is gone. Just remember that time heals all wounds. Just keep an eye out and one day when you least expect it, you'll find another Yorkie who needs some love and a good home. He/she will never ever replace Lexi but he/she will help make your heart even bigger and life fuller. Sometimes we have to wait for the right moment (which is so frustrating!!) Hang in there!

Hey their neighbor ;) I know that it is hard to grieve for Lexi and everyone grieves differently. My husband works in the city and gives me Yorkie reports almost daily so I know what you mean about seeing so many on the streets and how hard that must be for you. :hug: All that I can tell you is from my own experience you will know when it is time. Lexi was a part of your life with your Bf that will always be there and it will be memories that one day will make you smile instead of cry. When it is time to bring a little boy home and into your lives you will know it in your heart. You can never replace Lexi but you can add a new chapter to your lives when you are both ready. Hang in there. You just never know what might come up that could bring an unexpected change to your life In the mean time, keep researching, learning and educating yourself and of course save your money so that you are well prepared when that time comes.;)