puppy returned for crying at night--breeder needs advice
 

I've been a hobby breeder-exhibitor for 6 years, a relatively short time, still have lots to learn. This is not my livelihood, so I take time to enjoy my puppies and their parents and to be careful about the homes they go to. I make it clear to everyone that I will take my puppies back for a refund for any reason, and boy do I get some...Twice this year it's been allergies, twice it's been because the puppies cry all night. I just got another call this morning from a customer who took an 18 week old female from me on Saturday and is returning her today for crying all night. Am I doing something wrong in how I'm raising my puppies, or can they be expected to cry at night in a new home? I need input, please. Thank you, Belinda

i dont think it is how you are raising them.....lots and lots of puppies cry at night for a few days in a new home

Most puppies cry the first few nights at their new homes. I guess you need to explain this to people...unless puppy is exhausted...they're gonna cry a few days.

I think older puppies need a little more time to adjust. How are you raising your puppies at home? If you are keeping them in an x-pen at night or confined to a small area then you need to suggest that the new puppy buyer does the same thing. I think with crate training you would see a lot more crying, especially if the puppy is used to more freedom. I does not sound to me that the puppy buyer tried very hard to get the puppy to adjust. It is probably a good thing they brought the puppy back. A puppy that is used to being around other dogs would have a harder time adjusting to being alone. That is one reason I like to sell my pups to people that will be home most of the time.

I think the prospective buyers need to be aware that the new babies are going to cry at night. The babies are going from a home and siblings and people that they know to a stranger especially if the babies are not used to the same type of sleeping arrangements. If for example, you don't crate but the new owners stick the baby in a crate, it's going to be upset. What I tell buyers (and do this myself with new ones) is put a crate or playpen right next to your bed (I usually have one up on my night table so that the new baby is right next to me and if it cries at night i can reach over and touch them) Also I give the buyers a blanket with the smell it's used to and a stuffed animal to snuggle next to.

Thanks everyone---
 

This situation is particularly distressing because they are supposed to be experienced dog owners and they're suggesting the puppy has separation anxiety issues and they are returning her for her own good, even telling me she should go to a home that has other dogs to keep her company. My puppies live in large x-pens, 6x6' square, and she was one of two sharing the pen until she left on Saturday. I always send my puppies home with blanket and toys they have used in their pen at my house. I interviewed the people so carefully and they seemed so knowledgeable and responsible. I can't believe this puppy misbehaved badly enough to be returned so soon. Should I be training my puppies to sleep alone before letting them leave home? Most people call me the next day to say they are amazed at how well the puppy is doing, so this is a total shock today. Thanks again for the advice.

That is too bad. :( It makes me sad that these new owners are going to miss out because they can't make it through the first weeks of new puppy. What a shame. I think you are picking the wrong people. :( You need to pick intelligent people who know what a puppy means. Someone who has done their research and really wants a puppy.

Mine cried at night too....she missed her mom and litter mates. Normal! I knew she would. No way would I ever give up and give her back for any reason! Even my mom, who has my Yorkie's sister, who is a bit cowardly and not housetraining well, is super frustrated and has in moments of upset said she may not want to keep her....but then she cools off and says she wants to stick with it because you don't give up on them! I figure once you adopt, they are yours forever. You have to be strong and go through that phase and help the puppy adjust. It is like having a baby....they cry, the need to be let out, they need soothing and love, etc. Constant care.

Perhaps you should let all the new owners know this when they are adopting from you (especially if they are first time owners) so they know what to expect. The payoff in the end is the best reward. :)

I don't think it is you. Frankly, anyone who is already willing to give the puppy back for crying at night is someone you don't want to have them anyway. Sad....

I'm sorry. Hopefully you'll find them good homes soons. Hugs.

Little puppies cry at night when they first ccccome home at least both of mine did. They do better after some time but thats just part of having a new pup. I would just make sure new owners are aware that is going to happen. If I were a breeder and someone returned a pup for that reason I would keep the deposit

It's too bad that people today, are in such a hurry for everything!! Training a puppy takes time and compassion....obviously these people don't have either. You aren't doing anything wrong with the way you are raising them. Hope the little girl finds a compassionate forever home.

Anyone who can't work thru a few nights of crying isn't commited to raising a puppy at all. How do you think they would like to work on potty training for 6 months to a year? Maybe they just realized what a lot of work puppies are, and that they couldn't handle it. Glad they returned the pup so it can go to a home where it will be cherished, and have patient, understanding owners.

It's just amazes me how people think puppies come without obsticles to
face. Does a new born baby come this way? They don't seem to understand
a puppy is not much different from human baby at this point.
It's nothing your doing be thankful they are being returned to you.
They don't deserve the pleasure of having a puppy if they have the patience
or compassion for something crying in the niight, being in a strange house
without it's comforting surrounding and siblings.
So sad human's are. No common sence at all.
I am glad they are no longer with these heartless people.
This reminds me of the thread two weeks ago someone complaining about her 9wk old puppy she can't seem to train!:(

Here is the email about returning the puppy:
 

Dear Belinda, I hate to even write this email but I am afraid that we must return Lucie, and let me explain why. She is a beautiful dog and very sweet but she appears to have a serious problem with separation anxiety. She is ok as long as someone is right by her side or holding her. If we leave the room for five minutes she gets hysterical. The past two nights have been quite upsetting for her and my husband and I. She cannot tolerate bed time and barks and cries the entire night. I have never seen a dog do this without falling asleep at some point but Lucie was hysterical throughout both nights. This isn't good for her. I believe that Lucie needs a home where there is another small dog; a dog she can play, eat, and most important, sleep with. I think she needs that type of companion. I am concerned for her , and think it is better to return her now so that she can be with the other dogs in your home. She seems hyper and unable to sleep , and romping with other dogs would probably help her with that too. We truly wish that this had worked out for all of us. We would like to return
her as soon as possible along with the items that you sent her off with.
_______________
Thank you everyone for your kind words and trying to make me feel this sin't something I did wrong in how I raised the puppy. The above is the email I got this morning from the people who are returning her this evening. I never noticed this puppy being hyper. She is vocal when she wants attention, but quiets right down after getting her hug. This email makes her sound like a terribly neurotic puppy. What is the likelihood of that?

It sounds like that poor little girl needs a home where she can sleep with the owner or a companion. Some dogs do suffer greatly with separation anxiety.

Maybe they made her neurotic with their unreasonable demands

lol...

Is there any value to pre-training them to sleep alone?
 

I think I posted before that I'm accustomed to getting calls and emails within days of people taking my puppies home telling me how wonderfully well things are going and expressing surprise that there was no crying in the night at all. Can anyone offer insight on how a puppy would develop this separation anxiety and how to avoid it? Do any breeders separate their puppies prior to placing them in new homes? While I'll never be able to turn my back on my own puppy should it be unwanted by its new owner, I would like to minimize the incidence of these returns that in themselves must be very upsetting to the puppies. Thanks again.

Just my oppinion
 

Taking on a puppy is a big responsibilty. The new owner must know that there is an adjustment period. Whinning and crying is to be expected. Your taking a baby from the only family they've know since birth. What do they expect. My feeling are,if they have no patience at this point,the pup is better off going to someone else anyways. Good luck re-homing them. Your doing a fine job,don't make this your issue. :)

EEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!! I don't understand how these people can be so mean and not WANT their puppy to want to be with them!?!?!?! How can they not even let her sleep next to them in their bed or in a crate on the night stand.

I am such a softie but my babies are well-adjusted and love their mommy. Those people don't DESERVE your baby!!!

Gosh, that made me mad. I hope she finds a home like mine where the babies can sleep with their mommy!!

We try to seperate puppies around 14 weeks old...They are next to each other but they are by themselves...It seems to make leaving easier on them...I also suggest that new parents house their puppies in a 4x4 expen with a crate attached if they want to crate train...If they want to crate them at night then I suggest they put them in a small vari-kennel next to their bed...This has always worked for us and new families...

Maybe the new family that called you today just really isn't ready for a puppy....Be happy you are getting it back!

Grayson and Abby both cried however we put a blanket over their crate and didn't hear a peep. To this day we still put a blanket over their crates at night

I'm sorry your baby is gettng returned perhaps its for the best?

Oh get her back and it is there loss.. sorry you are going through this.. you just need to tell them straight up she will cry just be firm or print out some infor when they put down a deposit give it to the buyers and let them read it so they know what to do when the cry... Good luck ..

My Strawberry was whaling the first night so loudly that I had to put her downstairs so I could get a few hours sleep. I didn't want to let her out and then she would think that crying gets her out! Then the next night she cried too, but a bit less...the 3rd night I brought her kennel back into my room and put one of my socks in it and she only whimpered softly for a few minutes and slept the rest of the night. She still whimpers a bit every once and a while when she is first put to bed, but not much and she quiets down and only whimpers again to let me know she has to do her business. She is getting better and better and sleeping in her own bed now but it has taken over a month. But it broke my heart to hear her cry the first few nights. I knew she missed her mom and sister, but the only thing that would have stopped her cries was to let her sleep with me and I was not about to start a bad habit! (She needs to feel safe in her kennel incase I travel with her or she sleeps over at my parents place where her sister is kenneled at night) Otherwise, I would let her sleep with me! :)

I think you should just keep your chin up and be more choosy about who your puppies go to. Make sure they know what to expect and to do their research and give them tips on how to ease the puppy's fears the first few nights.

I do this with Murphy too.

I'd say 95% of puppies cry in their new homes. They are missing their mommy and their littermates.

Maybe if you sent the new owners home with a "What to expect in the first few weeks" manual?

I think the best thing is to tell potential owners that puppies do cry the first couple of nights in a new home. After all, the puppy's entire life has changed, new voices, smells, sounds, everything. One of the questions I ask is where is the puppy sleeping--if it isn't in the new parents' room, I usually don't sell to them. I do crate train starting at about 10 weeks, in the xpen--covering the crate with a towel. My puppies all love to go into the stroller, a dog crate, a dog bag and a lap before they leave home.

I have the same offer in place, I will take back my puppy or dog at any time. It shows your heart is in the right place.

I slept with Cooper on my chest for the first two nights...and then into bed with us he went. Good or Bad, he never cried once.

I'm sorry that this has happened. :( My puppies have always cried the first few nights. In fact, Livi cried for quite some time...until she ended up getting her way. She didn't want to be in her kennel to sleep so she screamed and cried until we decided to put her in bed with us...not another peep. :rolleyes: Huckleberry started out in his kennel, right next to my side of the bed so I could put my fingers in to comfort him...he also cried, well, actually he did a really cute howling sound. :D My husband started to get frustrated one night but then couldn't help but laugh because, yes, it got old, but he sounded cute (he also ended up in our bed as well). Anyway, I feel bad for you...these people should know better! Puppies are babies and they are going through a lot when they go to a brand new home. I can't even imagine how they must feel. They need a family that understands that this is going to take time and that they deserve to be loved and comforted.

Good luck finding a perfect home for her!

Tammy

I'm so sorry!

You know, I was always raised that dogs and kids are good judges of character.

Maybe little Loucie was able to pick up on something you didn't. Like they were impatient with her?

Gabby, I crate trained and ended up putting my nightgown in with her. We moved and she wasn't happy about being at a new place and now she sleeps with the boys. My oldest says she snores too loud, but hey! He started it. lol

Shadow, he sleeps with me. He gets upset with he can't be in the room with me. Doesn't bother me. If I wanted a pet completely independent I would have gotten another cat or a fish. (okay, my cat sleeps with me, too)

When I went to get Shadow, there were 2 other couples there. they were also picking up their puppies. While the lady was doing the paperwork, I sat on the floor.

Shadow came to me. As did the two little girls. When both the other couples tried to leave, they ran from them. I was able to pick them up. I don't know if they sensed in me how much I loved them all or the fact that I got down on their level and let them come to me.

I know you'll find the perfect home for her.

i agree...