Okay I just need to vent ~ Sorry!
 

Okay so this may be a surprise for some of you but My hubby and I have been trying to get pregnany since Christmas and so far no luck.

I am finally just going to vent to you guys about it because I am getting so frustrated. I do not want to tell any one here like firends or family because I do not want to hear "ARE YOU PREGNANT YET" a million times.

I am just so fristrated because I am having such irregular or actually basically NO periods so it is kind of hard to determine when I am ovulating when I can not even have a period. :(

Any way....I am going into the Doctors the first week in August to talk about why my body is not having any periods but I have a feeling they are going to want to put me on fertility medicine because I have always had menstration problems. I just did not think it woud be this hard and now I am starting to get stressed about it because I really thought it would just happen - any who...sorry to spill the beans and vent but I am just bothered by it all. :(

Hello!

Did you know that it takes, on average, 6-12 months for a healthy couple to get pregnant?? Of course it can happen sooner and longer than that, but that is just an average. I am sure it is stressful, but stress is one of the biggest causes of NOT getting pregnant. They actually say if you are at the point where you are so stressed about not getting pregnant, take a trip...have fun, relax, TRY to get your mind off of it and just let nature take its course. I know, easier said than done. I will send you lots and lots of baby dust..... :)

Tammy

you know i culdnt get pregant but not for awhile i was actually just looking to get pregant and the doctor had me take my temp every morning before i did my morning potty with a basil thermometer, i think its a basil and write it down every day and that will help to tell you when you ovulate and then i came to find out they thought i wasnt ovulating and so they put me on clomid prescriptiona dn you take it the first few days of your perios i think but dont quote me and then my period never came so the doctor said we lets blood test you so i went in for my test and i was all ready pregant bam
so that explained the thermometer not showing ovulation and no period but all we did was relax, we quit thinking about is this the time im going to get pregant, is this the time its gonna happen, and we just did to do it you guys sorry if its to ewwwww for ya :D
and then thats when it happened

so then i went in for my first pap and the doctor said wow youa re measuring 12 and you should be at a 9 so he said we lets ultrasound and see whats in there and then he got quiet and he said oh look you are having twins, i was like what the ......... and i had been mad at my hubby that day and mean to him and all that just went away i was like awwwww

just relax, it takes a while especially if you have been on any birth control

dont think about, my mother in law would say its all in the love

so just have love, and make love, and not think aboutbeing pregannt

but ill keep your wants in my prayers for a bounding bundle of joy

Big hugs to you honey I was there twice. It took four years of trying to get pregnant the first time. The second time too one damn try and the third took two and a half years.

I understand your frustration at the question being asked. It's hard and makes you feel worse when you know you are trying and it's not happening yet.

What helped me was the Dr. put me on BC pills to regulate my cycle. Then as soon as I stopped taking them (3 months) I got pregnant. I have always had irregular cycles (never a specified amount of days but always got it every month) so it made it a bit hard to figure out when I would conceive.

Also remember it might be a combined problem...sometimes them boys are lazy swimmers :D

Been there and one all of this other than the fertility drugs. So if you need to chat you can pm me and we can talk.

Big hugs. Keep your chin up. I now have 3 kids.

Hugs Caren! I bet the Dr. helps you get you cylce in order and lickety split- your preggers!

oh I know how you feel! I have REALLY bad menstruation problems...I have gone any where from 3 to 6 months with out my "friend".

Well when my hubby and I where dating.... We never really used anything to not get me preg. but maybe the 1st few times we "made love". yeah yeah I know... Bad girl.

Well we where married for almost two yrs (We where together 4 or 5 yrs total) before I found out a I was preg. I found out about 2 or 3 weeks before my APT to my OBGYN BC we where kind of trying but everything we did on are own, failed...SO we just didnt really think about it for a while or TRY(we still did you know what...but where not I guess thinking about me getting preg.)...and I made a APT with a OBGYN at the end of Nov last year and didnt think anything else about it... so on thanksgiving we went to my hubbies boss house for dinner and one of his little girls made a comment to me about being preg. Oh ofcorse I was like no and kind of blew it off...well when I got home.. I took a test. Yeah the little brat was right! (You know kids are always RIGHT about these things!!) I was preg!

I was soo Excited and Kind of caught off guard lol

So, Just relax and dont stress out about it... and it will happen. I know it sounds easier then to do but the more you stress about it...the more its just not going to happen.

Also you dont want to get sick of having "you know what" and make it a chore. Then it really wont be any fun trying.

Keep your chin up and it will happen when you least expect it... It Always dose :p

My dil was having the same problems you are. When the dr. finally got her periods restarted and put her on clomid of something it worked. We have a little boy due in Sept. I know it's easy to say relax but try it anyway. Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers for a positive test soon. patty

You are not alone. I have worked with hundreds of couples in the same situation. There is so much pain. I work in Nebraska for an adoption agency, and I see so many couples who deal with infertility. Some have an explanation, and others do not. I hope that you find peace in whatever happens. People who do not understand infertility say some very hurtful things, and often it is your family and friends who really only want to see you happy. Don't be afraid to share with them that you are hurting. Best of luck to you.

What a thoughtful post!

My son and DIL have been trying for 10 years. (They started from the day they got married) They are about to make an appt with a fertility specialist.
We know my DIL has poly cystic ovaries and endometriosis. She's had surgery for the endometriosis twice in the past.

I know how much they hurt from not being able to conceive and posts like yours make me feel so much better for them.

I keep my mouth shut about their situation, but her family gives them grief constantly. I told them do what they feel they need to do and if they need $$ to help out with the fertility specialist to let me know and I'll do all I can.

There was a similar situation on Dr. Phil yesterday. The doctor told the couple who were having the same problem exactly what as lot of the girls here said. The stress alone can be poreventing it.

She suggested that they only have "lets make a baby" hanky panky when she was ovulating. All the rest of the time, have just good, passionate, "for the fun of it" sex.

You can go onto DrPhil.com to find out what else she said.

Good luck. You'll get pregnant. It took my daughter about 1 year of trying, running to doctors, etc. for the second one. She gave birth to him and 6 weeks later, got (accidentally) pregnant with the 3rd!

I understand how you feel because I have also been there. I got pregnant the 1st time right away but tried for almost 5 years before getting pregnant with my second child. (my boys are 9 years apart and we started trying when my oldest was 4) I too used clomid but I know how painful it can be especially when you see someone get pregnant who probably shouldn't be a parent at all or worse yet, doesn't want to be a parent at all. I hope things work out for you - I think some day you will look back on this and things will have worked out exactly how they are supposed to and you will have a beautiful perfect child to love. ;) Theresa

Bless you in this tough time.... may things get easier for you....
good luck!
sorry I have no advice but just wish you luck!
d

Hey Caren! I thought FOR SURE your vacation would do the trick! I hate to read this post and read that you are sad. I really don't know what to say since I haven't been there. Just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking about you and keeping you and Chris in my prayers! XOXO

I just wanted to share this with you. My sister always had irregular periods, she tried for 9 months to get pregnant. She went to the doc, was diagnosed with polycystic ovaries, they put her on Clomid. I have a beautiful nephew who's almost 8 and a gorgeous 5 year old neice. I'm not suggesting this is your situation, just wanted to share a success story to boost your spirits. Good luck to you.

OH my gosh ... you are all so lovely and wonderful.....this is exactly why i love this forum and all of you. :)

Thank you for listening to me whine and being the voice of compasion and reason. You are all so kind and I love how everyone is there to pick me up when i am blue. ;)

What a cool and exciting story you have to share with your little one, one day! I agree...I am trying not to get stressed and have just good old fashioned FUN sex...ha, ha - sorry TMI - I know!! :p :p

I have heard that clomid may be the answer to my polycystic problems.....sounds like many are on it so I am sure it will be something the Doctor will discuss with me since I have always had irregular periods!

Congrats to you and your DIL - I bet you are all so excited!! :thumbup:

Thank you for this beautiful and thoughtful post. I really do appreciate your words of compasion. I know my family would understand...only reasoning behind me keeping it from them is I am the only one or first one to have tried for a baby in my family besides my sister who lives in Hawaii.....days aways from us so the grandparents are dying for a grandchild. I do not want to get everyone excited if it is not going to happen - ya know.

Although I have confided in my older sister in Hawaii and you are right - she has been so great to talk to and supportive. :)

Thanks Rebecca...your such a great friend. I know you think of me often. I love ya - you know that!! ;)

I also have polycystic probs. we tried and tried to have our son. My dr finally did a laproscopy (sp) and removed the cysts and we were preg soon after that. of course they came back right away, but we had him and hes 18 mos now. I only have 2 tiny scars one inside my belly button and one tiny one where a c-section scar would be. its not very noticable at all. You may want to see if this would help. I wasnt even suppose to be able to have anymore at all after my surgery to remove cervical cancer that they found when i was preg with my 3 year old and removed it when she was 6 weeks old. Dont give up, dont stress out, stress will make things even more out of wack. Good luck!!

Caren - I hope that the Dr. can get you on the path you desire quickly.

When my hubby and I were first trying to concieve, I also had very irregular periods. It was impossible to know when I was ovluating. After 9 months of no luck, I missed a period for long enough to think I might possibly be pregnant, despite having no symptoms and a negative pregnancy test. The day before my first OB/GYN appointment, I had a very strange "period" with lots of cramping and a fist-sized clot that looked like it had straw sticking out of it. Once that happened, the "period" stopped. I believe I had a miscarriage though the OB/GYN who was a brand new doctor for me did not agree. I was very frustrated and decided this doctor was not the one for me. When I then missed the next period and again had no pregnancy symptoms and a negative pregnancy test, I made an appointment with an OB/GYN that came highly recommended. His nurse listened to my story and thought perhaps there was a hormone imbalance, so I felt at least they might be able to find some answers. Well, it turns out that he did think I had a miscarriage and then conceived immediately after. My son was born on the due date given to us by the ultrasound.

I hope your journey turns out well for you.

Wow Jodie...that is quite a journey you and your hubby had. But great news you could have a son!! :)

I am hoping things turn out the best for me and my hubby. I know it is still very soon, I just thought all these years to take BC pills so I did not get pregnant and now that I want to get pregnant I can't - funny how life works, huh? :rolleyes:

I will try to keep the stress down and just not think about it and I know God has my best interest at heart! Thanks for all your kind words!! ;)

As someone who has had "woman" problems basically since I was 16 (I'm 26), the most important thing to do is find a doctor you trust. I have seen doctors who didn't believe I was in pain, who told me to take an advil and get over it. I've seen doctors who just looked at me and told me that pain is "normal for you". You have to understand that YOU know your body and your doctor is NOT always right. When I was 16 my doctor actually told my mom I was MAKING UP the pain. WTF? And it went downhill from there. I finally went to a surgeon who agreed we needed to look inside before another doctor put me on some awful injection for endometriosis (Which I don't have! But he did find the cause of 90% of my pain!) I'm SO GLAD I did that. When I went back to the doctor with another problem, she just shrugged! Like, oh well we've done all we can.

I finally, finally - 6 doctors and 10 years after this all started have found a wonderful doctor who listens and doesn't think pain is normal. She's already helped me more than any of the other doctors have.

We've never tried to get pregnant, but I won't be surprised if we have problems. I'm only sharing this to urge you to find a GOOD doctor, and don't wait. They are out there, they are just hard to find. REALLY hard to find. But finding the right one is so helpful. Good luck.

I'm so sorry you are going through this...... I have a friend who tried for over a 1 yr to get preg. well she got sooo worked up and I'm not sure why this happens but once she kinda decided to take a break...then BOOM...she was preg. Its weird, but I know a lot of people and it happens that way. Maybe you are getting your body stressed out too much for it to happen. Seeing a doctor is your best bet. They too thought they might have to use fertilitiy place which was expensive, but turns out they now have a healthy baby boy who is 6 months old. Just see the doctor and see what he says. In the mean time try to relax as much as possible.

or you can make love then stand on your head....to get those suckers to swim down...lol lol lol ( I really have heard of people doing this) You might look funny butt naked standing on your head but I'd try it...lol :) :ghug: :ghug: :ghug: :ghug: :ghug: :ghug: :ghug:

I'll be praying for you!!!

OMG Denise......You just made me spit my water out of my nose laughing so hard. ha, ha!! :lol tears :eyetearss :lol tears :eyetearss :lol tears :eyetearss

I can just see that now....me standing on my head and my husband thinking I have REALLY lost it now!! OH MY!!!! :lol tears :eyetearss

Thanks girl for making me laugh!!

you never know...he might think its a new position...lol lol lol:) :eyetearss

Please don't think I'm making light of your situation. Was just trying to make you laugh! As they say...Laugher is the best medicine.

OH NO....I knew what you were doing and it did make me laugh, actually crack up!! :p :p

I agree.....I am trying to stay stress free so it was all in good humor and I needed it!! Thanks girl! :D

Awh...Thanks Des - you are always so kind - I love ya girl!!

So when did you and hubby decide not to try any longer? Your daughter is in collge now right? You really would be starting all over - how much fun though!! :D