Seeing the love of your life with someone else This story is about a guy who I see as "the one", long story short, we met very young and after only a month of dating he moved to another state. We kept seeing each other but it didnt work out long distance (I was afraid to move with him) but we kept in contact for 8 years. I saw a picture of them together. I feel so heartbroken. I know we feel very strongly about each other and have very strong chemistry. I did make the mistake to tell him how I felt and that I could possibly move for him now. That I have feeling for him. He said he did too and that he would come see me and try IF he wasn't dating anyone. But he has been with someone over a year and he really likes her. I asked her if she was "the one" since they have been together for a year and he said he doesnt know yet. He said we are star crossed lovers .... I need some word of encouragemnt, . Should I leave him alone? I know what the answer is though I hate the thought of him getting married to someone else. And I can't help but think if theres something I can do |
His been with her for a year & STILL does'nt know if she's the one. Hmmmm, I see a problem with that but maybe it's just me ??? If you feel that strongly about him then I would persue, but that's just my opinion. I also don't think telling him how you feel was wrong. |
I think I should back off. I told him how I felt and thats that. If we ever find each other single I guess we could give it a try. But I dont want to interrupt his life while he's with someone else. It's not fair to anyone. |
If his feelings were mutual he would drop her for you! The fact that he isn't sure is a sign that he's not the one maybe. Give him the cold shoulder and I'm sure he will come running to you! He thinks you will wait patiently for him to decide who he wants to be with. Just in my opinion ;) |
Dated only a month and than moved to another state for 8 years and still there? If that's the case, personally, I think you made the right choice. Actually being with someone and keeping in contact is just so different. |
Is this one of the guy's who treated you badly before that you have written about several times??? I was just looking over previous post's you had done and seems you had several problems with gentlemen. I would most certainly leave this person alone. |
No it's not the guy that treated me badly. This is someone who had to move for a job, and I never wated to move with him because we only dated for 1 month. Then a couple of months over the distance but it didn't workout. I have to move on and keep looking. I just have bad luck with men :( |
Quote:
|
I have no advice but would like to share something that i once read :) A wedding ring is the smallest handcuff ever made choose your prison mate carefully |
Quote:
LOVE THIS and VERY true |
Nice post :) I agree with that. |
Quote:
I won't last long in prison! :D |
No one can make you happy, complete you, make your dreams come true or anything else. That is all fairy tale and make believe. Also, there is no love of your life in a month or any time. My husband is my best friend but we work hard to remain friends and love each other. I thought he was cute when we were 18 and, looking back, I thought lots of other people were cute too :D But the love part came when we developed a relationship over time with mutual goals and experiences. So, I'd say that if you have bad luck with men, perhaps you're approaching it in a way that is not quite reality. False expectations leave us hollow. Love yourself for who you are and not what you could be if you had someone else. Everything falls into place. Advice from an old person (not me - I'm still young - kinda). :D;) |
Quote:
OMG!!! #priceless |
There's plenty of fish in the SEA.... move on!! |
Quote:
And secondly, drop it and move forward. What you're clinging to is an imaginary scenario. It would never be like you imagine. That is why it isn't now. Drop it. Leave it alone. He shouldn't b talking to you like that either when he is with another woman, how disrespectful. |
Quote:
I'll add, he's been out of state 8 years, he's wishy washy with a gal he's with, don't do it to yourself, the waiting, the pining, it isn't going to happen... At best a future with him is friends with benefits and that is it. If that's all you want, all you expect, that would be one thing but it seems obvious that you want more, commitment, permanence, growing old together... That isn't going to happen with him. Move on! Your efforts have a better chance of success elsewhere. :cool: Most young guys today are pigs, some of them change with age, most of them don't. You can't be the one to change them. Be honest with the one you're with, don't get used and don't be a user. Synergy! :D |
Quote:
|
Quote:
|
Quote:
My thought is really that there *is* a reason (or reasons) that you're apart even though you both kind of want to be together. Something is stopping either you, or him, or both. That reason is likely very important, and smarter than you both....bc it's coming from your gut(s), not your head. Pay major attention to those things that don't come from your head. Our instincts can be very, *very* smart. I don't think he is the "love of your life" bc I truly think that's yet to come for you - BIG TIME :love:!!! Save |
Um, I'm hoping it's not this guy you wrote about last year? http://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/off...me-either.html Seems like he's still trying to string you along if it is. If it's a different guy, you gotta start attracting a different kind of guy honey! ETA: I see it's a different guy, but I stand by my statement. Love yourself first and your true love will come. No one can truly love you if you don't first love yourself. I am reading some self esteem issues in your posts. For example, why would you go to an online public forum for relationship advice? |
Quote:
|
There is an oldish poem, I can,t remember the author; but it goes something like this, People come into your life for a reason and for a time; some for a short time and some for a long time. some are friends for a season, And some for a lifetime. Some we love with a deep abiding passion, And some for a weekend. Value each, and let go when it is time. None here or elsewhere can make your decisions for you. Therapists can help clear a muddied thought process and in that way help you to make a clear choice. Letting go is a choice as is acting on your feelings. Consider carefully with intelligence married to your heart. I wish you well as you move through your life. |
Quote:
"People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime..." |
Quote:
|
All times are GMT -8. The time now is 08:48 AM. |
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright ©2003 - 2018 YorkieTalk.com
Privacy Policy - Terms of Use