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Question?? Hey everyone, I am a bit confussed.. I am hanging out with this guy (the last couple of days) I am am starting to have feelings for him.. He's really sweet and whenever i am around him, I feel like a princess.. The only problem is he's older than I am... My question is has anyone ever dated someone alot older then them.. BTW, I'm 25 and he's 37 but looks 30.. My good friend and her family know him really well and they have been trying to hook us up and I trust them (as they are like my 2nd family) |
I don't think that's a big problem. Love comes in all shapes, sizes and ages. If he makes you happy, then don't question anything. Just go for it. Good luck! |
i've never dated anyone over 5 years older than me .. but if hes treating you well go for it.... what is it thats making you think its a prob? |
i do not see it as a problem you both are adults. and besides it is not like you are 16 and he is 37. |
Yeah, i mean I am only out of my relationship with justin 3 weeks and he knows I'm not ready to do anything too rash now but I really think I like him.. We've only hung out 2 times but I see him all the time at the gym.. He's just a total sweetheart.. He bought me dinner last night and he's so easy to talk too.. I guess I just worry to much about what others think |
My husband is 12 years older than I am. We connected on a core level, very early in the relationship and were married after 3 months of dating. We have been married 7 years and are still going strong. What impressed me about my man was his honor, trustworthiness, attentiveness to my needs, and he was great in bed ;). Yes in the very begining, before we started dating, I was concerned about his age (I thought he was too old for me because I was a "hip-happening" woman :) ), but we blended so well, after about a week, it did not matter anymore and still doesn't. |
Can I be the devils advocate just because I want you to think it through? Ok here I go. I know I might get crucified but it's ok. So he's 12 years your senior, which is ok now, but what happens when you're still young and want to have fun and he just wants to stay home. Or he that he will be a senior citizen 12 year before you!! Not to mention other things (you know what I mean). I'm totally supportive but just want you to think of these things before hand. It is quite early after Justin too, so just take it slow and however it works out, good luck. |
I think 12 years is a lot but if you like him, then I say go for it.. Its not like your going to marry him tomorrow. And Never worry about what others think, If something or someone makes you happy, that is what is important..BE Happy! |
If it doesn't bother you that he's older, than don't worry about it. I think big age differences are strange when one of the people is really younge (like 16), but when you're older it's not such a big deal. If this is someone you feel like you really connect with, then go for it. Plus, if he looks 30 then that's great- if you're self-conscious about the relationship at first, no one will even know the difference while you're still adjusting! Follow your heart- this could be The One. |
Like I said, he's really young for his age.. He's a bodybuilder and he's very activie.. likes to do alot of hiking, camping, etc.. I never had any adventure with Justin at all.. I told this guy I'm not ready to be in another relationship yet.. I told him I want to enjoy being single and everything.. Nothing has happened between us yet but like i said, he looks like he's 30 and is just very reassuring and easy to talk to.. I appricaite all of your feedback whether its positive or negative!! I am not rushing things.. He's just a friend right now i think he's just going to stay a friend even though I am dying to hook up, i know its too soon!! |
Age should not matter...it is the feeling and connection that are important in a relationship...if you and him are comfortable then go for it...but I agree that you should take it slow and have fun for a while...you just got out of a relationship and need time to breathe but keep him around as a friend and then see where that goes... You never know where fate will lead you!! |
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My husband is 8 years older than me and my dad was almost 9 years older than my mom. With me and my husband we've been together for 21 years and married for almost 18. I was 19 when I met him and it was such a relief not having to deal with immature guys that I went to school with and forgive me for being so blunt. No having to worry about if I was going to have to fight them off before the night was over with. That was really what attracted me to my husband I never worried about having to tell him take me home know. I never felt like I had to fight him off. So I definately think that being with a man older than you definately has it advantages. Congrats on the new guy in your life. Enjoy every minute of it. I still do. Sheila |
Age to me isn't a big deal....I think if you were 18 and he was 30 12 years seems like a lot...and if he is fun...then who cares...and if he treats you good then he sounds like a keeper!!!! Give it a try who knows what can happen!!! BTW my Great Grandparents were 12 years apart and they were married for 60 some years...so good luck and don't worry at all what others think!!!! Keep us posted :) |
Yea, as I said right now we are just friends.. Nothing is going on but he;s calls me all the time to say he's thinking about me and that he has such a great time hanging out but he knows my situation and knows I'm not really to be in a relation.. I am enjoying his friendsship though and he's awesome body!! |
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Nothing wrong with that just have some fun. You deserve it. Sheila |
Just let things happen. Don't worry about what others think or if they stare, as long as you are happy and content, that's all that matters. They don't live your life and pay your bills, so they sure shouldn't put a cramp on your happiness. :) |
I definitely think it's OK girl! But make sure you consider everything, like Nobella said, you also have to consider the long-term. But one of my best friends from high school is 23 and married a 35 year old last year and they LOVE their life together! And it could be worse! My grandmother was 19 when she married my grandfather and he was 44! (She's in her late 60s now, and he died of old age back in the early 90s.) |
Brooke: Just have fun with it. See how you get along. When I first moved to NYC, I was really young (23) and had always dated guys my age or younger. When I was 25 I met this guy through friends in finance and he was 42 and recently divorced. he was really cute and I though why not? I went out with him for about 6 months and it was really great. He really spoiled me and surprisingly we had a lot in common and since my dad was a commodities trader, I knew a lot about his business. Long story short, I knew I wasn't going to marry him and he did not want anything serious but I just went with it until it ended and boy was it fun while it lasted! |
Things are going so well with me and this new guy.. We hung out last night and again today... I think I am starting to really like him but we're taking things so slowly so its great!! Thank you for all of your thoughts and support.. You all are truely great friends |
I think you are doing the right thing...taking it slow and just being friends first. The age difference is not a real problem in my opinion. Does he have baggage...kids, ex wife? |
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age is just a number and if you like him and he likes you thats all that matters id say go for it and see how it goes, it doesnt matter how long you have been on your own be it 3 weeks or 3 years if its ment to be its ment to be, wendy and rosie :rose: :yorkiesar |
Brooke, sounds like you're taking it slow. You're a smart girl. I also dated an older guy when I was about your age. They do know how to spoil a girl don't they?? Just to play devil's advocate for a moment...Things to ask yourself: Yes, it's good that he's not got an ex, kids, etc., but why has he never married? That's an important thing to know and can tell you a lot about him. Is he commitment phobic? Is he being honest with you? Do you know any of his friends or family? This older guy I dated lied to me about his past relationships. I knew he'd been married before. No children. But, come to find out, he had not one, not two, but THREE ex's!! We didn't last long after that. If there's anything I will not tolerate, it's someone lying to me! Now, I'm not saying these things apply to him at all. Like I said, devil's advocate. Some food for thought. It is really soon after Justin. Go slow. Let us know how things progress. |
hmmmm...good question - MY husband is 11 years older than me - I never really felt the age difference till this last year - and most people have baggage after their 30's...it's just part of life.....but I wish you luck and if you're happy - GO FOR IT ! |
My husband is 8 years older than me and I think it's great. When I met him he was soooo much more mature and stable than the losers I was going out with. It had a few drawbacks since he coached high school hockey I wasn't that much older than the kids and they always teased him that he was robbing the cradle! But I say don't worry about age. If it feels right go for it!! |
I am 36 and my husband is going to be 44 this year. I dont think age matters if you share the same interests and are comfortable with each other as well as enjoy each other. just take it slow and your heart will let you know the rest. Have fun with it and see where it goes!! :D |
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