Not so thrilled with my not so DBF!
 

I bought my BF the World of Warcraft game and two expansion packs for Xmas. I got them about 2 weeks ago and had been planning on getting them for him for months. He is always playing free games online and I have caught him playing the WoW free trial many times. So, I thought, what a great way to get him out of my hair while I'm doing homework, and also I knew it would be something he really loves.
Little preface, he is so stubborn about people getting things for him. My mom wanted to buy him boots for Xmas this year and he argued for a week until she just said ok, if you want to argue fine, but that means these are the boots you are getting and now you have no say in the matter.
So last night he says to me, "Will you do me a favor?" and I said, "what's the favor?" He wouldn't tell me, so I wouldn't say yes or no. We went around like this for about 45 minutes (Immature, I know :rolleyes:) until he just pulled my gift receipts out of my hiding place in my purse and said "Take them back." He RUINED the surprise, and turned down a gift I had put a lot of thought into. ALSO, my brother was going to get him some additions to the game because he knew i had bought it for the BF, so that will be spoiled too if I decide to take it back.
I am so frustrated with him because I feel that he has been ungrateful and has turned his back on my family's generosity multiple times now. He also chose to do this at 1 am when I had been up for hours studying for my finals tomorrow. He KNOWS I am swamped with homework and I just need him to leave me alone for a while so I can get it all done (hence why I bought him the game). AND, my birthday is in just a few days, and I feel like he spoiled that for me too. Instead of thinking about having a good time and enjoying anything I get, I am thinking of how he turned down my gift, and now I don't want anything from him. GRR! I don't know what to do. I wanted him to have this gift, but the way he behaved about it makes me want to return it and not get him anything.
What do you think ladies? Am I overreacting? Do you think he is looking a gift horse in the mouth? I need second opinions.

ahh, when is your b-day? Mine, my hubbies and one of our sons are all the 20th.
Did his family have money growing up to where he had nice Christmas'? If not, that's probably why, some people are just like that, doesn't make him bad, he maybe just feels uncomfortable having people buy things for him, then again, he shouldn't have been snooping around either..I do feel for you

Ok, I would be upset that he was digging around in my personal stuff and looking at reciepts. My BF and I dont keep secrets from eachother, but we also dont go messing around in eachothers, purses walletts ect.
If he is uncomfortable getting gifts from your family and is snippy with them about it, there may be underlaying issues that you don't know about. That would be my main concern. But it is something you can talk about and work through.

I would suggest getting him a visa gift card he can use anywhere he wants as his main present, and if you still want to get him something personal make it a small gift he can't get upset about. Or you can always take him out for a romantic New Years Eve dinner as a Christmas Present, that way you get to share some quality time and have a great ending to a frustrating time and a wonderful start to a new year. And if you play your cards right he might spend the gift card on you! JK! lol!

I hope you can work through this and have a very Merry Christmas!!!!

I would be mad that he was snooping and that he ruined the surprise!! Id take it back and get myself a gift!!! HAPPY EARLY B-DAY!!

LOL, I like this idea!

phfgkl, my birthday is this friday the 12th. I don't know if it has to do with the money, but maybe. He wasn't as broke as my family growing up, but I think it has more to do with him being stubborn. This is our 5th Christmas together, I don't know why he would think I wasn't going to get him something.

MEN! :rolleyes: :mad: :p

Id say tell him you did bring it back, hide the receipts better and give it to him for xmas anyways. Tell him to 'get over it' and that it brings you joy to get him something for xmas. Tell him he is ruining it for you and your family and he needs to just be grateful. Thats what I would do. Would it work? maybe... maybe not! LOL good luck girl! :)

I would be more angry that it's your 5th Christmas together and you are still just his gf. ;)

Seriously though, what is is reason for not wanting it? I would be livid that he went through your purse snooping. Just sounds like a whole can of worms opening up if that were me.

MY Husband doesnt like me to buy anything for him either. Its mainly because he doesnt want to have to go out shopping and look for something for me. So every year we just buy something for the house. This yr we are getting a deep freezer. I would just keep the gift and give it to him Christmas

I think this is a pretty good idea, but I'm still pretty peeved at him for what he did. My frustration makes me like the idea of spending it on myself better, lol. I'm going to let myself cool off for a few days before I do anything, that's for sure.

How disappointing!! Sorry this happened. It is so hard to give to people who have that attitude. I have no clue what you should do, but you did get some good suggestions.

Have you ever had a heart to heart with him about why he feels this way? It could be very enlightening if you could get him to talk about it. Is he embarrassed?, does it make him feel obligated?. Is he too proud to accept any kind of help from others? I would be very curious if it was my BF.

In case I forget on the 12th I hope you have a fabulous birthday!!!!

I'm so sorry! Boys can be such butts. I'd give it to him anyway. He'll have to deal. You worked rather hard finding him a gift that you thought he'd like and then he totally rejected it. I'd have cried if my dh did this to me, not gonna lie. haha. I'm a cryer though. hope you find a happy solution.

I know you were joking about the first comment LOL. My advice to the OP is stay the girlfriend, I got better gifts then! It took me 10 yrs to decide to get married :p

I would not be happy about him going thru my purse, etc. I do not touch husbands cell phone, wallet, etc. He doesn't touch mine, either.

Oh, and I would tell him that this gift was from you, to him, and from the heart. The cost does not matter if he cannot get you something of the same value, tell him you picked a gift that you knew he would enjoy, and use.

Holidays can bring out the best/worst in people. Husband and I came from not-so-wealthy families, but mine was a little better, just because I had a father, he didn't. My grandmother had a huge role in raising us, and since she had lived thru the depression, and had raised 4 children of her own, she was a "Practical Gift Giver" We mostly got clothes, and only a few toys.

I am still a practical gift giver to this day. I just bought husband new slippers, and some windsuits for him to wear on his days off/to the gym. I also bought him a video game he asked for. I had to stop buying him socks and underwear (things we received) because he made fun of me so much for it LOL. We just viewed this as "re-stocking time" LOL

Husband is going to buy any and everything he has heard me mention I like, or think is cute, over the past year. Seriously. I have learned to really reel in my comments, I have ended up with the kitchen aid mixer and other gadgets I would have preferred to just lust over vs. have the cabinet clutter.

Wow. You guys are WAY nicer than I am. If my hubby pulled that crap I would say fine, take back the gift and spend it on myself. I wouldn't get him a damn thing with that attitude.

Mine is like this in some ways too...and he wants to know exactly how much I've spent/will be spending on a holiday or bday because he wants to do better...:rolleyes: I've told him 1000 times that I don't care who gets more "stuff" and I don't care if he doesn't want anything...the biggest part of Christmas for me is enjoying it with my family and taking the time to find thoughtful gifts that I know will mean a lot to each person I shop for...so it's important for ME to get everybody something that I care about. That's what I usually tell him when he says that...that it isn't about HIM...it's about me and I like buying things for people, giving gifts, and making people happy...so he needs to just suck it up and enjoy...:D