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tanksmom 09-09-2008 06:31 PM
Not sure how to handle this (long)
 
MY Daughter (10 yr) believes she will be a ballerina for a living. Shes been dancing for 5 years the last 4 at this school, the best in town. Just recently shes been relunctant to go on Tue. when a specfic teacher (co owner) is teaching. After talking with her and watching classes Ive come to the conclusion shes unhappy because she believes the teacher doesnt like her. And I agree with her, the teacher is just not interacting with her AT ALL. Treating her like shes invisible. I dont know how to handle this. If she wants to dance she HAS to go here and see this teacher. I understand peolpe through your life are going to dislike or ignore you and you'll have to get use to it but I pay for her to be taught. Im afraid if I talk with the teacher she will become defensive or vindictive(I dont know her well enough to know her personality). But if I dont say anything and things continue this way she will learn nothing and possibly lose her love for dance. Im terrible at confrontation and just wish the teacher paid attention to my daughter, even just a little. HELP

YorkichonBella 09-09-2008 06:43 PM
This is a difficult thing to handle...I understand yr concern. I experienced this as well with my daughter yrs ago. For me, I spoke up. Do not be intimidated. You are paying for this service & want the best possible for yr daughter. I think there is nothing wrong with speaking to her in private & voicing your concerns in a polite, but firm manner. First, possibly ask her how she thinks yr daughter is doing? See how she reacts & what she has to say. Maybe this will give you the direction to take the conversation to the next level about yr concerns. I wish you the best. Dance was an important part of my daughter's life. Hope all yr daughter's dreams come true!

Betty'sMom 09-09-2008 06:47 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by YorkichonBella (Post 2229647)
This is a difficult thing to handle...I understand yr concern. I experienced this as well with my daughter yrs ago. For me, I spoke up. Do not be intimidated. You are paying for this service & want the best possible for yr daughter. I think there is nothing wrong with speaking to her in private & voicing your concerns in a polite, but firm manner. First, possibly ask her how she thinks yr daughter is doing? See how she reacts & what she has to say. Maybe this will give you the direction to take the conversation to the next level about yr concerns. I wish you the best. Dance was an important part of my daughter's life. Hope all yr daughter's dreams come true!
:thumbup:

BubblPopElectrc 09-09-2008 07:04 PM
I would bring it up in a nonconfrontational way. Maybe she has to many students (as instructors often do in learning-based situations) and isn't purposely ignoring your daughter. Good luck! :)

KimberlySRN 09-09-2008 07:13 PM
I agree. I would say talking to the teaher privately in a professional manner would be your best bet.

chattiesmom 09-09-2008 07:51 PM
You've been given some very good advice for this very touchy situation. I wish you good luck with your meeting with the teacher. Please tell your daughter that dreams really do come true with hard work and dedication.

AVERYxo 09-09-2008 10:37 PM
i'm so sorry your daughter has to go through this.. i know it's not an easy thing for EITHER of you to be put in that position!! :( maybe talk to someone HIGHER UP?? :confused: i'm not much help, sorry.. but something needs to be done for sure. whether its talking with the teacher or someone else there that can help you.. your daughter deserves the best, especially since you are paying good money to support her passion!! she has a talent and has been given an opportunity to express her creativity, with the possibility of pursuing it professionally.. her dreams/goals should not be affected in any way by one person's negativity.. her teachers should be mentors for her(especially at a school that you choose to send her to) It very well could be the way the teacher is..(you know some people just aren't very compassionate and come off rude, etc. maybe before you approach a higher up.. maybe you can introduce yourself to her, so she sees how much you care about your daughter and her passion! then see how it goes from there, if nothing improves THEN say something to her or someone above her?!:confused:

silyjillie 09-09-2008 11:06 PM
I would speak up too. The most important thing is your daughter's passion for dancing, you don't want to lose this. She's so young and it's good that she has dancing in her life and that she sees it in her future. Another reason to speak up is that you are paying this instructor. I danced for a few years and I know it's not cheap. It's very expensive with the classes and preforming and traveling. It's terrible that your daughter is reluctent to go to class those days. I like YorkichonBella's idea of asking the instructor how your daughter is doing and if there is anything she can do to improve the areas she's not strong in. Good luck! Let us know how your chat with the instructor goes!


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