Who is going to be in the delivery room with you/who was?
 

When we first started trying to get pregnant I had made up my mind that when we got pregnant that it would just be me and DH in the delivery room. I wanted us to be the first to see our baby and I feel that the delivery is something for just the two of us to share. Here we are prego and due in July. My mother insists she is going to be in the delivery room because she was for her other two grandchildren and she is going to be for this one. I have been telling her for a long time that it was just me and DH. She blows me off and says whatever. She does not believe me. I invited her for my next sonogram because we find out the sex of the baby. My DH has 16 year old daughter so she is going to. I told her I would compromise and she could go to the sonogram since she would not be in he delivery room. She blew me off again and still I don't think it has sunk in that I don't want anyone else in the room. I even told her I would not call when I went into labor if she was going to continue that way and no respect what I wanted. That did not go over real well. Anyway, just wondering who is going to be in the delivery room or who was with you? Do you think I am wrong just wanting DH and I? Do you think when the time comes that I will want her in there? My sisters think I am making a big deal out of it because they did not care who was there or not.

Well I had a csection with my Daughter so it was just my husband and I but as soon as they wheeled me back My brother in law and sister n law and son were in there. When My sister in law had hers she had both mother and father in there , Motherin law and her Husband and her sister and brother in law. I cant imagine being in full labor and having that number of people in there

I think it is soley your decision. If you want it to be an intimate thing that only you and your husband (and daughter) share, I think that is completely an understandable choice!
My first, I had hubby, mother, mother in law and a ton of interns! LOL I delivered at Stanford hospital and agree'd to share the learning experience with them!
My second was just my hubby and mother in law. I didn't put too much thought into it and have no regrets for either one. It truely is up to only you ;)

I wanted to go in with my daughter when she had the 2nd one, but, she said NO, she said there were 2 of them when the baby was born, and there was only going to be the 2 of them when they had her..Well, I've already talked to my d-i-l to be, and asked her when her and my son have one if I can be in there, and she said yes..but, I'm sure that's not going to be for awhile yet..They probably won't get married until she finishes nursing school next year, then, I'm sure they'll wait another year or two..they want to make sure they are financially set first.

It was just DH and me in there the three times. I wouldn't have minded my mom and MIL in there with me or maybe my sisters.

I would tell him to maybe speak to her. I can understand her wanting to be there but I can also see your wanting it to be just you and hubby. It's a very private thing being in the delivery room and being exposed. If your not that comfortable with her being in there then that is your right.

Try to get your point made without aggravating yourself too much. Sounds to me like your mil will be a bit over bearing as well when you have the baby.

For my first it was my husband and my mom. For my second it was my husband, mom, and son. For my third it was my husband, mom, 2 sons, cousin (my best friend) and her son. My 4th was a csection and my husband barely made it in there on time. My 5th was my husband and 2 oldest sons while my mom was home with my 3rd son and my daughter because I had been in labor forever and it was the middle of the night. Same thing with the 6th.
I love having my children in there with me. My oldest was so sick when I was having my 6th, but he started crying almost when I told him he might not be able to be there.
When my cousin was there for my 3rd, it was sort of accidental. She thought I had already had my son, and was coming to see us. She hadnt talked to me for a long time that day, and just figured he would have been there by now. She got there about an hour before I had him, and her and her son just ended up staying in with us. Her son and my oldest were 4 at the time. They were coloring pictures at the table in the room, when her son Kaleb looked at me. He saw that I was pushing the baby out and says "HEY GAVIN (my oldest) YOUR MOMS HAVIN' A BABY!" They were SO excited!
The next day Kaleb told his grandma, my aunt, that I pushed a baby out of my butt and it was bleeding. He thought it was awesome :rolleyes: :D

It completely up to you with what you feel comfortable with. I would have very hurt feelings if my daughter didnt want me in there with her, but I would try to respect that. Tell your mom they have a nice waiting room and the cafeteria has great food and that she can be the first visitor in to see the baby after you deliver because you love her so much :)

For me it was just my mom.

OOPs I thought that it was your mil there...lol. Ok so it's your mom...oh boy that is gonna have some drama...lol. Either way I can still see your wanting it to be you two only.

I had a c-section so it was just me and my husband.... I would've loved to have my mom or mil but both are gone... on second thought... I'd like to think they were both there. :p But I think you and your husband need to decide what you are comfortable with.

I have a mom who doesn't listen too :rolleyes: - so maybe if you really don't want her there you will have to let the hospital staff & doctor know - they can handle her, you are going to be a little busy doing other things. Talk with your doctor about it.

That said, I would never had imagined my scenario. -- When I went into labor, it was all back labor - none of those contractions across the belly they teach you about. I was dying - they put me in a shower chair & ran water on me forever. My parents came in while I was in labor in the bed and my dad started rubbing my back for me, when the doctor said were going to have a baby soon do you want your parents to leave? At that point, I was beyond caring who was there! - my dad was rubbing my back, while my husband was helping me concentrate on breathing in front of me & well my mom, my mom was just grinning ear to ear. So both my parents were there, it was a moment I know they will never forget.

When my brother & I were born they didn't let men in the delivery room, so it was pretty special for my dad to be there. He ended up taking pictures, as he was the best camera person there besides myself ;)

I know my mom would have loved to have been in the room with my brother & sil when their 2 were born - but it didn't happen, don't think she asked :rolleyes: (if it had been me again, she would have!)

When I had Niki I had complications so not even Jimmie were there for the c section. Since I was knocked out and never even had any contractions, I would love to be there when Niki has her child. But if she does not want me to be there I will abide by her wishes.

1st child was an emergency c section. Had eclampsia. Went into convulsions, When I woke up They told me It's a boy. 2nd Horrible Horrible..Natural..My mother was there. 3rd No One. 4th My husband, I seriosly thought he was going to pass out..

Well I was ALLL the way in Germany when I had my son..my mom was getting ready to come here THAT day... so it was just me a DH THANK GOD lol. BC My mom would have made me kick her out of the room I was waiting in. SHe wanted me to do things HER way and was REALLY MAD I didnt do it with out drugs. I was like, tuff. I am doing it MY way. SO I was SOOO glad Pedro POP in the same day she was leaving to fly here LOL

And I don't think its wrong of you in any way that you dont want your mother in the room with you. She should respect your wishes

Well I know when I am getting ready to delivery I want it to be just me and my DH!! :D

When I have children, I would want my (future) husband to be with me in the room, and that's it. I think it's more special that way. Of course, things can always go wrong, like what if for some reason he is stuck at work, or whatever (I would probably KILL him then, LOL) but if for whatever reason he isn't able to make it in time, I would want my mom and just my mom. I don't want a whole audience!

I don't think it's wrong at all! When I had my son it was just me, hubby, and my mom. My MIL insisted up until I was about ready to push that she was going to try to stay. She walked over to the bed and asked, "do you still want me to leave?" I said yes. Stick to your guns. I don't regret not letting my MIL in, (I had other reasons she didn't go back. She treated me like crap for years then wanted to share a special moment, ummm no). Though your mom may be hurt at first she will understand. She will be so excited to see your new baby. :)

I had a zoo in the delivery room with my first. It was so hard and really took away from the bonding. I didn't get to hold him right away. Everyone kept passing him around and wanted their turn. It really was hard.

After that... nobody is allowed by me and dh. I don't even tell people when I'm in labor. We just go and call them later, lol. I hate the thought of anyone waiting around on me. The last 2 were scheduled inductions and most everyone know, but we still didn't call until it was all done.

Only my Husband and the medical staff and of course the wee little one who popped out for all three of ours.

I think your Mom and me think on the same line...:) I had to deal with the pain(one of mine was 9 lbs 2 oz) and had him vaginally on my b-day(hubbys b-day too)...I think everyone should have to feel good old labor pains..

Well I'm no where close to having a baby, but when I do, it'll be just me and the baby's daddy. I go back and forth on my mom being there. I'm 24 and still want my mommy when I'm in pain, however after getting in a near fatal wreck, when I had to get staples in my head she couldn't stand seeing me in pain so she made my 42 yr old sister come in the room and hold me down.

However I do want the family and his family around close by, so they can come in shortly after the birth. When my nephew and his wife had their baby boy, they were induced so both his family (his mom, dad, two little sisters, his grandma (my mom), and I) were there as well as his wifes mom and dad. We were able to go in and sit on and off with her while she was in labor, but when it was time for the birth, we all went out in the waiting room. About 30 mins after Coley was born, they came out and told us and we were able to go in and see him and hold him. It was really special being with them so soon after the birth.

with my first daughter it was my mom, his mother and him. With my son it was my sister and hubby and with my daughter it was my mom and my hubby and thank god my mom was there and not my sis, I almost died during deliver and my sister would not have been able to handle that as well as my mom did(surprisingly) :(

Wow...does your situation sound familiar! Hubby and I had said all along that it was going to be just the two of us...not even MY mother. My MIL insisted that she was going to be in the room with me...she honestly thought that all the way up until the night before they induced my labor! Then she called my husband in tears saying that I was being mean to her by not letting her in. When he finally convinced her that nothing was going to change our minds, she rebounded with, "Well, at least the baby will get to sleep in my bed when it comes home from the hospital like my other 2 grandchildren did!" WHAT!?!? I still to this day don't know why she EVER thought that was going to happen...we didn't live with her, or even near her for that matter.:confused:

Anyway....bottom line is, when the time came, DH and I were the only ones in there.:p

With both of our boys, only hubby was with me. My mom never even asked if she could go in. My MIL wanted to with us for our first (I lived out of state from my mom then) but I told hubby no and expressed my wishes to my doctor. He totally took the "blame" and told her it was his rules no one in delivery except father of baby so she didn't go. We moved back to where my mom lives before 2nd was born so she was definitely closer. MIL came up day before delivery (scheduled induction) and never once asked to go in there. Of course, the hospital I delivered the second one at had a policy at that time only 2 people allowed in room while in labor - father and one other - and then no one but father during delivery. Worked out great cause I had complication immediately after delivery and hubby almost had to leave.

I agree with the other poster who said to discuss with your doctor. Make him be the "bad guy" in this if she still insists on going in. The main thing is this is YOUR special time and it should be the way you and your hubby want it to be.

When I had my daughter (30 years ago tonight!!!) her dad (not current DH)was the only one with me. He refused to call my mom and I cried through the whole delivery because I wanted her with me.
13 years ago my youngest sister was having her 2nd and called that I had to be there with her and mom. I thought that she wanted me for support during labor....no.. I heard her yelling "get in here Jean, I can't do this without you" that's the last thing that I wanted to see...forceps in aciton.
10 yrs ago, daughter (happy b-day to her), having first child had me and step-dad (video for her), dad & step-mom (fainted), her hubby, 2 nurses and dr in a tiny room for the delivery.
7 yrs ago, daughter, having second child had her hubby (fainted) and me (same doctor & I cut cord on this one).
4 yrs ago, daughter, having third and last child had her hubby & me (same doctor & got I to catch her and SIL cut cord...by this time we knew the drill real well).
My baby days are over for awhile, I hope.

When my daughter was expecting, I didn't want to be in the delivery room. I can't tell you why, I just didn't. My husband (her step father) on the other hand, asked her right away if he could be there. He said he was not allowed to be in the delivery room when his own (now grown) children were born, and he really wanted to witness a birth. He told my daughter that it was OK if she didn't want him there, but she said it was fine with her.

We were all there when she was in labor. I was in and out of the room and when it got close to time for the baby to come, I said I would go home and get my mom so she could be here to see the baby after it was born.

Well, when my mom and I got back to the hospital, the baby still hadn't been born and my daughter sent my husband to get me and my mom from the waiting room. She said she wanted us all in there. It turned out to be so special. There was baby, mom, grandmother, and great grandmother, all together. Afterwards I was really glad to be there.

My husband was so cute - he helped my daughter so much, he wanted to be involved and she was grateful for his help. About 30 minutes after baby Abigail was born, my husband was holding her and talking to her. One of the first things he said was, "I'm going to take you fishing and hunting and do anything that you want" You know what, Abigail is now 11 and she LOVES to go hunting and fishing with her dad and papa. Must have been that talk at birth that sealed the deal ;)

With my first son it was my husband and my mom. With Second son, it was my husband and his sister. My third son was born at 27 weeks, I was taken by ambulance to University Hospitals Of Cleveland. Just my husband and about 14 other people crammed into labor room when he was born, I did not make it to the Delivery room to have him so they had to rush him off to the neonatologist that was in the delivery room waiting for me to get their. With my fourth son it was the same thing, he was born at 28 weeks. I was on hospital bed rest up at University Hospital of Cleveland for about 2 months before he was born, I made it into the delivery room with him but because of the premature birth they still have to have all those specialist ready to work on the baby so I had about 14 strangers present at his birth too.