Returning Miss Jessie -RIP
 

My sweet little girl was returned to the heavens March 9, 2022. I will miss her every day for the rest of my life. Thank you for being you Miss Jessie and for the years of endless love and devotion. You were everything to me.

She was 15 years and 5 months. She gave me the happiest days of my life. My life which is forever changed because of her love and caring.

It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life, to hold her until her last breath. Unfortunately, it haunts me right now. But what haunts me even more was the short period of time in which she was truly suffering. That period of time that it took for me to come to grips with the fact that I was going to have to make the gut wrenching decision to let her physical body go, forever. I never cried so hard in my life.

How does one move on from this heart shattering experience?

I know what you mean about being haunted with seeing her suffer. My little guy asphyxiated over a period of about 72 hours; no sleep. What a feeling of helplessness. Those eyes.

You were lucky in that you got to be there and hold her, and that you were able to cut that suffering short. Those last several hours could have been done without. As far as being haunted with making that decision, you were going to be haunted either way. Darned if you do, danged if you don't.

I feel your pain as I just lost my Lily in January I had to make that call as well. But thankful that we can. Does not make it any easier but so much better for our beloved pets. I believe they are waiting for us And are free of pain But having to say goodbye is the hardest thing. And we have to give ourselves time to grieve. Big hugs to you

I'm so very sorry. Sending deep sympathy.

I have been struggling with lasting mental images of "those eyes" - they yank at my heart and send tears streaming down my face every time. I only know they serve the purpose of ensuring that we know under no uncertain terms that it is time to say goodbye to our precious pooches.

This is the first time I have been with a pet when their life ended. All other pets I ever had were when I was a kid and the pets met with untimely ends or ran away. I felt as though I betrayed her by holding her while the vet injected her. And when her lifeless warm body rested in my arms for the next several minutes while the vet prepared the little basket it was absolutely gut wrenching. I cried so hard I had muscle aches for three days. I was not able to go in the bedroom for a week and when I did, I had to change the furniture around and redecorate because what happened there sent chills throughout my body and tears streaming down. I took it really hard. I probably won't get another pet.

I am sorry you weren't able to be there at the end for your Ranger. My neighbor planned to stay with her dog at home until the end and when he started really struggling, she was going to run him over to the vet, but as she left the room to collect her things, he took his last breath, so ultimately she was not with him for his last breath and she regretted that. We do the best we can under the circumstances and probably most wish for a do over. My mom couldn't bring herself to take our first family dog in to be put down so she asked a family friend to drop him off. My mom had regretted that decision, but when I shared my recent experience with her, she decided she probably did the right thing.

So sorry for your loss 😢

If she was at least in the house with him and was with him most of the time, I don't see the big difference. Ranger was in the hospital in an oxygen cage. I reached in and got to pet him one last time about 12 hours before I lost him (and he knew it was me). I am at peace with the way we left things off. I would never trade a chance at life just to get that last moment, even if that chance was just 5%.