yorkietalkjilly | 03-12-2017 04:30 PM | First let me express my sincere condolences for your sudden, horrible loss. I can only imagine how distressed, hurt and angry you are as I watched my sister and her husband go through something very like your awful loss. My sister lost her little Silky years ago in the same way when her little Mindy darted out the door the TV repairman opened while sister was in another room answering the phone and next thing she knew, she came into the den with the sliding glass door standing open and no Mindy in the house! She immediately looked out back and then out front, saw Mindy across the street and in her panic, wildly called to Mindy who crossed the street right in the front of a police car, which couldn't avoid her. , My sister saw Mindy run over and lying in the street! The policewomen immediately took Mindy and my sister to ER vet where Mindy was humanely euthanized due to the extent of her injuries the next day. Don't know why the vet didn't do it immediately but he didn't.
My poor sister grieved so for months, feeling guilty for not better watching her very own dog, wondering why the sudden phone ringing distracted her, even though she had told the TV guy not to leave any doors open and the phone call one she had been waiting for. It wouldn't have been so bad if TV man had just left the den door open to the back yard if only he hadn't left the back gate open too as he exited it to get to his van for a repair kit he needed!
Billie felt so guilty for attending to the sudden ringing of the phone over her dog's needs, just couldn't forgive herself or that repair man. She suffered the loss of Mindy greatly for several months, less so for all these years as Mindy was a very special dog, so bright, intelligent and the love of her and her husband's life. Her great bitterness filled her for too long and only started to fade once they got another dog a few months later. That dog saved her, even though she still grieves the way she lost her Mindy.
Getting her poodle, Tippin, totally helped her anger, rage and pain of the way she'd lost her special Mindy and she finally started to heal as Tippin's tender, merry little ways began to fill her heart with happiness and love again. Tippin brought both Billie and her husband out of that awful hole of misery by just being himself and became a very special dog in his very own right.
Grieving a great loss to one's family is an awful time in life and I wish none of us ever had to go through it. Still, take the time to grieve, rest and baby yourself, telling yourself that you made the best arrangements for Kairo you could under the circumstances, never intended this awful catastrophic accident and that your mom was likely just caught in a sudden moment of a sudden happening, distracted and not thinking, when she forgot to be sure your baby was on lead before opening the door. It happens all to often in dogowners' lives. People's pets door dart all the time during unforeseen moments of life and too many face what you are. It's hard to live life in total charge of everything we do.
The pain of losing a beloved dog is just as severe as losing many of our human family members and living with that pain, so severe and all-encompassing now, does eventually diminish over the next weeks as your body and psyche begin the process of acceptance of life as it deals us blows and try to lean how to live on somehow. Talk about your baby all you can, share stories about her, get your feelings out here and in your real life to anyone who will listen. It's important to talk about her and your raw pain and guilt, anger. Seek counseling if you need it, lots of pet owners do! But once your pain has lessened some and your heart is ready again, likely only devoting yourself to giving a loving home to another little baby who badly needs it will really help to fully heal you. Your sweet Kairo would above all want you to heal and be happy again. |