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Sharan 04-23-2011 07:33 PM

My sweet boy
 
For a while I have been wanting to post, express my loss to those who would truly understand. On March 11, 2011, I lost my sweet boy, Bijou. At first I couldn't even speak. He was with me for just about 15 years. I had this hope/belief that he would be with me longer. I had 18 years in mind. Well, no matter, even if he had lived that long, it wouldn't have been nearly enough. Only you out there in Yorkie land understand. My little angel was my best friend through so many ups and downs. He was perfect, I understood him, and he understood me. I can't imagine ever having another companion that would be his equal. He responded perfectly to me. I felt a real and meaningful connection with him that can never be matched. It's as if he could read my thoughts and feelings. He had been going down for some time. It had been years that my dear boy could no longer hear my voice. He could still read me, and he learned hand signals intuitively. It was never an effort to teach him. Then eventually he couldn't go up and down steps. He couldn't jump up on the stool to the sofa. He was too unsure at first, and gradually wouldn't even attempt. He slept a lot in the last few years. Every once in a while a spark of puppy in his eyes, he would try to play for a moment, and then stop. I knew our time together was growing short, and I dreaded the day. I hoped he would quietly pass in his sleep at night. But, one morning, his last. I could hear him whining, quietly. He never cried or complained all the years we were together. I knew he was in pain. He let me hold him close the whole day. I spoke with his vet on and off during the day. He had stopped eating for days, and had been under doctors care. That day he just fell over three different times. I couldn't bare seeing him suffer. He continued to sigh and lay with me all day. I made the decision to put him to sleep. I always promised myself I would never let my baby suffer. I held him until it was time. He was so sweet. He licked my tears as I held him. How could I ever let him go? The pain was almost too much to bare. I still don't know how I had the strength to do what I did. I second guessed myself, I hated myself, I just wanted him BACK!!! The pain was more than I could bare. It took a couple weeks before I could speak about it at all. I'm surprised that his death was the worst grief I have experienced so far. And he was just a dog. Just a dog... But he was my best friend, and my sweet baby. I will never forget this amazing, sweet companion for the rest of my life. I've had many pets, dogs, cats, and more. But, never have I had one so special and perfect. He was my once in a lifetime. I have another Yorkie who is very sweet, and well behaved. Her and I will go on without him. She is very much loved, and very dear to me. Her and I will stick together. But, my Bijou, my sweet boy, I miss him so.

Ringo1 04-24-2011 06:51 AM

I'm so sorry about the loss of your sweet boy; I can tell how much he was loved.

And I understand the grief that can come with the loss of . . just a dog . . as non-dog lovers cannot.

Please accept my condolences on the loss of Bijou.

Sammy Mommy 04-24-2011 07:28 AM

I'm so very sorry for your loss. It is such a heartbreaking thing when we lose our pups. Only other pet lovers can understand how badly it hurts. Sending hugs to you. Rest in Peace, Bijou.

TxVicki 04-24-2011 08:16 AM

I'm so sorry for your loss of Bijou. Rest in peace sweet boy.

boopster 04-24-2011 08:23 AM

Your pain at losing Bijou comes out so clearly I'm sitting here crying. Many of us have had that loss, and I just wish I could take away some of your sorrow for you.

Mollysmom411999 04-24-2011 02:29 PM

What a wonderful and special relationship you had...it is the hardest thing I ever had to do and still cry everyday. Please know we understand what you are going through. We grieve their loss as we would any other family member or friend, and sometimes its even harder as these guys truly are our special companions like no other.
Hugs to you during this difficult time ans know we are here for you...
Rip Bijou, mommy loved you so.:*(

My lil friend 04-24-2011 03:13 PM

Your baby was not just a "dog",he was a tiny boy in a fur coat. I had a friend just like that not long ago (Bunkey) and we spent 10 wonderful years together. So perfect in his friendship and obedience. Such a loving giving heart,always wanting to please. My heart broke until I was ill, I do feel your pain. I pray that you and your little girl will grow and heal together. Although he will always be in your heart I truely hope that there will be enough good memories that the bad days will fade away. Blessings to you and yours as you try to heal from such a deep hurt.

lisaly 04-24-2011 04:24 PM

Your beautiful words express a love so deeply shared, one that can never be taken away or forgotten. You gave Bijou your love throughout his lifetime and ultimately lovingly helped him to pass on. I don't think there's any way to really prepared to lose someone loved so dearly. Each year I hoped for another year, just one more summer with my little girl, Ashley. She was still very active at almost seventeen, but still I knew time was precious. The sweet memories and special bond always remain, and so will the love, even in Bijou's passing. Know that others here truly understand the love and how much it hurts to lose a little one. I hope your little girl helps to ease your pain and that each day the beautiful memories replace the sadness. I am truly sorry for your loss.

stanziog 04-24-2011 04:34 PM

So I am sitting here crying with my heart hurting over your loss. I am thinking how much pain i feel for you. These babies just take our entire being and give it love in its purest form. I am so sorry for your loss but i know you are a great person for having that little being in your life...my prayers are with both you and your little baby at this time...

Perrella 04-24-2011 04:52 PM

Your words brings me to tears. So very glad you and Bijou shared such a special bond and love which is so clearly spoken. He will be in your heart forever and you see one another again. I know you are hurting, please believe in time, you will think of your little Bijou and smile.

RIP sweet little one.

Sharan 04-24-2011 05:05 PM

Thank you all so much for your kind words and for sharing my grief. It's so nice to find a place where others understand. It makes me feel better to know that I'm not alone and that others care and understand. These babies are the sweetest I've ever known. Babette and I are growing closer. She is a comfort to me.

my2boyz 04-24-2011 05:11 PM

I'm sorry for your loss of Bijou. You are in the right place to find friends who understand.

Patti 04-24-2011 05:19 PM

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious Bijou. He sounded very special.

darnlora 04-25-2011 11:09 PM

Oh my goodness my heart hurts for you he will be in your memories and thoughts forever just know he was equally blessed to have you love him...... Rest peacefully little one. You will see him again one day. Hugs to you .

donnie 04-26-2011 04:18 AM

im soo sorry for your pain and loss, there not just a dog... there our "fur butt babies" but he will live and run free both in your heart as well as over the rainbow bridge.....


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