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-   -   I really need help! (https://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/general-yorkshire-terrier-discussion/95183-i-really-need-help.html)

FrankiesMyBaby 09-19-2007 09:53 AM
I really need help!
 
I will start from the beginning. I got Frankie on February 9th and he is now 10 months today =] I love him to death, but with working, and now the boyfriend is back in school, I wanted to get another, so he would have some company.

I have been talking to this lady, and I am interested in getting a Morkie (yorkie maltese mix). I knew that Freddy(boyfriend) did not want another dog, but I brought him home pics of her at a week old, and she is now 2 weeks old. He did not say anything about NOT getting her. He knows that is all I want for xmas.

Well today we were out to lunch, and I brought her up. He flipped out and told me that I can NOT have another dog, but he can not give me a reason why, other than "I dont want another dog", and then threatened me and said if I brought home another dog, he was leaving. I am almost positive that he wouldnt leave, I think he was trying to get the message across that he doesnt want me to do it.

So, what I am asking from you guys is, HOW DO I GET HIM TO CHANGE HIS MIND? I just dont know what to do. I want her SO bad. that is all I have wanted for the longest time, and he knows that. Any ideas?

thanks

Akina 09-19-2007 10:03 AM
Ohhh it is difficult, isn't it??
My boyfriend isn't thrill about Momiji either so there is no way I'm getting another dog....
Unfortunately I think it will be difficult and will take long time to convince your bf.
Does he like your current yorkie???
If he doesn't like your current yorkie because say he barks, then you can start train your yorkie not to bark and tell him "Look he doesn't bark any more because I trained him right. I promise I'll train the new puppy. Will you please agree to have another one??" something like that.
But he just doesn't like dog, then you have no hope.
If he is just like my bf, (his view on dog is 180 degree different from mine... just a dog, dog should be outside, dog should not be wearing cloth, etc...) I'm sorry but you don't have a lot of hope....
But please don't bring another dog if you both don't agree to do so.....
Both of you will be unhappy....
Good luck!!!

aarnold808 09-19-2007 10:17 AM
Me and my boyfriend have the kind of relationship where if I want something then he just HAS to accept it. However, sometimes, it does take a little convincing on my part, that the decision I've made is the best one for the both of us. My best advice is, just drop little sayings like "my poor baby is all alone.. both of us aren't here to take care of him", and "oh, I wish he had a little friend," and things like that. After awhile, either they will get sick of hearing it, and give in or you'll plant the idea in their head, and they will suggest it themselves. That's how I've always done things.

FrankiesMyBaby 09-19-2007 10:31 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Akina (Post 1379863)
Ohhh it is difficult, isn't it??
My boyfriend isn't thrill about Momiji either so there is no way I'm getting another dog....
Unfortunately I think it will be difficult and will take long time to convince your bf.
Does he like your current yorkie???
If he doesn't like your current yorkie because say he barks, then you can start train your yorkie not to bark and tell him "Look he doesn't bark any more because I trained him right. I promise I'll train the new puppy. Will you please agree to have another one??" something like that.
But he just doesn't like dog, then you have no hope.
If he is just like my bf, (his view on dog is 180 degree different from mine... just a dog, dog should be outside, dog should not be wearing cloth, etc...) I'm sorry but you don't have a lot of hope....
But please don't bring another dog if you both don't agree to do so.....
Both of you will be unhappy....
Good luck!!!
these boyfriends, why do we have them? LOL
but no, he loves frankie. but i had to BEG for him...
when we got frankie, we went to "look" but i had the money in my purse lol
and when we got there freddy said, "do you really want him?"
and that was that...
SO. I am thinking of doing the same thing. just not sure if it will work twice haha

thanks for you help =]

FrankiesMyBaby 09-19-2007 10:32 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by aarnold808 (Post 1379891)
Me and my boyfriend have the kind of relationship where if I want something then he just HAS to accept it. However, sometimes, it does take a little convincing on my part, that the decision I've made is the best one for the both of us. My best advice is, just drop little sayings like "my poor baby is all alone.. both of us aren't here to take care of him", and "oh, I wish he had a little friend," and things like that. After awhile, either they will get sick of hearing it, and give in or you'll plant the idea in their head, and they will suggest it themselves. That's how I've always done things.
I say those things , ALL THE TIME. he only gets mad about them. I told him that I was done ASKING him for things, bc he doesnt EVER ask me about anything. lol i need to get that rule you have. :)

thanks!

Yorkiekids 09-19-2007 10:36 AM
Your relationship should be a partnership, and one partner shouldn't be bullying the other. If you take care of the dog, and are responisble you should be able to get another without his approval. Guys Yuck!

EmrldShdwQueen 09-19-2007 10:38 AM
Quote:
Me and my boyfriend have the kind of relationship where if I want something then he just HAS to accept it.
lol...yeah that's how my boyfriend is too. I told him a long time ago that he's just going to have to accept that I'm going to have lots of fur babies, and if not, he can find someone else. They're a part of my life, just like children, so he knows they come with the package, and he accepts it, sometimes unwillingly...haha.

I doubt your boyfriend would leave because of another dog...I know when I just had Maddie she caused MORE trouble by herself because she was lonely!

Wylie's Mom 09-19-2007 10:40 AM
Hmmmm...instead of writing all the things going through my head, I'll just ask one simple question: do you really think you two are compatible?

chachi 09-19-2007 10:41 AM
If he would leave you over a dog you dont have a very strong relationship anyway. Relationships are a partnership and one shouldnt force their way on the other.

MIZBROWN 09-19-2007 10:52 AM
Well... think you have to make a choice my dear. How bad do you want to pup? You also have to consider his feelings as well! I dont know how serious you all are, but if you live together than he has just as much of a say as you do.... its his home too. Not to mention if its gonna cause a huge problem between you/bf, than it might not be the best idea...

KathyinCali 09-19-2007 02:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MIZBROWN (Post 1379982)
Well... think you have to make a choice my dear. How bad do you want to pup? You also have to consider his feelings as well! I dont know how serious you all are, but if you live together than he has just as much of a say as you do.... its his home too. Not to mention if its gonna cause a huge problem between you/bf, than it might not be the best idea...
Ditto - It sounds like the first furbaby was a true compromise for him. Some people are just not as "crazy" as we are about our pets. Maybe one furbaby is as far as he can truly compromise?

Of course I say this knowing full well I would haunt my husband in his dreams if there was something I wanted :)

Best of luck!:animal-pa

LoveMyJake 09-19-2007 02:52 PM
When I wanted to get my first yorkie, my husband said no way. He said he doesn't like small dogs, he wanted a lab. Well, over the years we have had labs and other big dogs. I felt it was my turn to get what I wanted. I have the attitude that I work full time, so I should be able to buy what I want and not have to answer to anyone else. My husband isn't the controlling type, so he never says anything, and I don't go crazy spending money or anything. We got Jake, and he fell totally in love with him so that was the end of that. Then, I wanted another and he said one is enough. But, after awhile he changed his mind, and we're getting another one.

My argument to him was that Jake has made our lives so much fuller because he's lots of fun and has made me soooooooooo happy, another one would just add to that! He couldn't argue with that because he knows it's true lol.

Just give your bf some time to think about it, and maybe he'll warm up to the idea.:) GOOD LUCK!!!

MissSophie 09-19-2007 02:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by chachi (Post 1379959)
If he would leave you over a dog you dont have a very strong relationship anyway. Relationships are a partnership and one shouldnt force their way on the other.
Exactly.:thumbup:

yorkiegirl83 09-19-2007 03:03 PM
Maybe ask the details of WHY he doesn't want another dog.. maybe they can be things that are worked out.

I know my hubby didn't want our 2nd, 3rd, or 4th LOL but he loves them now, although we both admit it's a ton of work and was easier with one or two.

If he really doesn't want the dog that much, I think you need to think about what is more important to you.. the puppy or the boyfriend, and after hearing his reasons on why not, really analyze if there is truth to them before making a decision.

FrankiesMyBaby 09-19-2007 03:30 PM
I am sorry that I made it out that he was a bad person, if I did. He is NOT. We have a VERY strong relationship, and I think that him saying that was his GUY way to try and get his point across, that he doesnt want another dog. He would not really leave me for a dog, and I think I wrote that in the first post, so sorry for any minunderstanding there =]

I just wanted to see if anyone had any i guess, sneaky ideas LOL
Thank you all so far for your advice tho ;)


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