Playing Devil's Advocate
 

I am truly trying to understand something.

You see threads where people are wanting to rehome their furbabies or get rid of them because the dog didn't turn out to be what they originally had in mind (e.g. bigger, smaller, wrong coat, coloring wrong, whatever reasons).

What I have seen is that people come to these threads and try to talk them into keeping the dog or flat out blast them for wanting to rehome. Now, I understand if someone is asking for advice on whether they should keep or get rid of the dog. However, what I do not understand is those that will take it upon themselves to get on their soapbox.

Maybe I'm wrong...but if someone has decided to get rid of/rehome their pup/dog, then by all means, DO IT! If they are entertaining the idea then their minds are pretty much made up. Why take the extra effort to try to make them feel bad for their decision?

Yes, I understand that having furbabies is a big responsibility and it should have been researched before making the committment. However, I'd rather someone rehome their pet than to keep the pet (because they felt guilty by something they read here) in an unloving home.

I see these threads and sometimes they are 10+ pages long of people telling them they should keep them or telling them how awful they are for even considering it. Sometimes I will post a reply of wishing them the best and then shake my head and move on at the responses.

Am I the only one that feels this way???????

Maybe I have been missing the threads, but I feel like if anything, people are the opposite!

The only thread I can recall of with what you are mentioning is the one with the dog who is supposedly going to be to big (and she decided to keep).

It is very understandable that things happen. It's very unfortunate that some people choose to rehome a dog because it turned out to be too large, not the color they wanted, etc. Alot of the problem I blame on the breeder for not doing careful screening. As an exhibitor breeder I have a clause in my contract that I have the right of first refusal, should a situation arise that the owner cannot keep the pup, dog etc. I take the dog back and have the final say as to where the dog is rehomed to.

I agree ....... that is the way it should be!!! I commend you & hope that more breeders start taking on the same responsibility! :bravo:

I didn't say that I thought it was right for someone to rehome their dog because they didn't do enough research (to be honest, I feel quite the opposite about it).

I said I didn't see many threads with people dogging them for rehoming a dog.

I usually try to encourage and be helpful the OP...I dont try to take sides or critisize their decisions or beliefs...they have a right to them as we all do..

The post that I thought you might be referring to about the new member who thinks she bought from a puppymill and was lied to about the size of her dog I did get on my "soapbox" for lack of a better term...to inform and hopefully help her understand that there is no way to predict the size of a yorkie...that is something she didnt realize. Her vet predicted a size and I stated that there was no sure fire way to know for sure...I just wanted her to hear that...I wasnt judging her decision whether or not to keep the dog..if she still wanted to rehome it...or anyone else for that matter..I would encourage him/her to do that...I dont bash anyone for their decision. I think that poster is very glad she got to hear things that she didnt know before she came to yorkietalk or at least it sounds like she is. In the end she is keeping him and loving him and thats great...now had she decided to not keep him I would have tried to give her advice on how to find him a great home...most posts I read everyone seems to be on the same page...there are a few here and there that might bash...but the non-bashers (not even a word lol) far outweigh the bashers....

My one sent...gave my other cent away earlier lol...

Dawn

TXShopper, I agree with you on every level of your post. I probably know of the thread you may be thinking of.....

I think when someone comes on here and says they can't keep their dog due to medical/family/job/lifestyle change/etc. issues, people are supportive. People are sensitive to the "my dog didn't turn out the way I wanted" or they have unreasonable expectations (like a 4 month old to be housetrained). Loki is 12 pounds and I was told he'd be 7. He'd rather sleep in my bed than go shopping with me. But he's still my baby dog and I love him. I think people immediately think of how much they LOVE their not-so-perfect dog and feel somewhat offended. But there are all kinds of dog owners out there, many not quite as obsessed as us or those that see dogs and just dogs. :eek:

Sammy was re-homed from someone on YT. We love her SO MUCH. Rehoming is a difficult decision to make and in many cases it's the best decision. She's adjusted very well and I think she loves us too - considering she's sleeping on my pillow right now. :D

In the case of the 10 week old puppy that was posted earlier, i think people were just trying to explain that not all Yorkies are 5 pounds and even the 10 pound ones are very small dogs. This is kind of unique to Yorkies & small dogs. I don't think people would be so quick to give up a lab because it's 80 pounds instead of 60 or whatever. So when you look at it like that, it makes sense that people try to talk them out of it.

There were plenty of times I wished I could have rehomed my human kids. They didn't turn out exactly like I had planned, but they are still wonderful.

I tend to look at my pups a bit differently, but how could I ever think of rehoming them, as they love me unconditionally.

Let me apologize to everyone here. I was NOT singleing ANYONE out! I have been a member here for over 2 years and "these" threads have gone on since the day that I joined (and I'm sure longer!). I truly hope that I haven't made anyone feel bad about anything. There is NOT one particular post that comes to mind...just the "feeling" of all of them. Again, I apologize so please don't take it personally! I was NOT pointing my finger at any one person:(

Back when I joined, there were many people that wanted to rehome their yorkie because of potty training issues. I realize that yorkies are THE WORST when it comes to potty training. My Gracie is over 3 years old and will still, to this day, find a pee pad in the house when it's raining outside.

In this case, if someone is wanting to rehome their dog because of this very problem, I say, DO IT. It's obvious that patience is not necessarily the forefront with this dog owner.

I agree these threads pop up every few days... I don't think you were singling anyone out. It's an interesting topic. Also, I notice that some people post how they realize they made a mistake and want what is best for their dog - rehoming it. Then there are people that want to sell their 8 month old dog for the $1500 they paid for it because it ate the shoes they left out. The tone of the original post plays a lot into people's responses. We are also a lot more supportive of a re-home of a long-term member vs. someone who comes on here trying to sell their dog because they are unhappy with it. There are so many factors that play into it, including the OP and the first few people's reactions to it.

I think you are right though, that if someone obviously cannot or does not want to keep their dog, we should not try to make them feel bad about it and should help the dog find a new home.

No, you're not alone. I feel the same way. To me the best thing is to get the dog asap to a loving home where he will be appreciated, get the best care and the love he deserves. I hate to think of any dog being rejected and going without love just because the owner wanted something else but decides to keep the dog because of influence by others. It's not the dog's fault and he will probably sense that he is not really wanted. Dogs are living beings with feelings...not accessories. Also, there might be times when the owner doesn't wish to reveal the real circumstances of why they need to rehome...divorce, illness, etc. We should respect this and let them do what's best for everyone.

Your not alone...:)

I had one upset me.....How do you feel about this? You see a thread about rehoming and for personal reasons they want to "rehome" the dog.....then later in a PM tell you it's not the everyday upkeep of the dog thats the problem they want to sell the dog to pay off debts? They are asking over 1,000 dollars for this dog??? This took place a long time ago, I dont even think this person posts anymore I am just curious if you all would have the same thoughts as I did?

I personally think selling is TOTALLY different than rehoming??? rehoming I would think you take a loss, selling for over a thousand, to me is trying to make money.

I try not to get on my "soapbox", and I also try to keep in mind the best interest of the dog. And, if someone truly wants to rehome, I would rather be helpful and give them advice than beat them down over it.

But, on the other hand it is hard to see people bringing living creatures into their lives and dismissing them over size, color, potty training, ect.

What happened to responsibility prior to purchasing an animal? Doing the research to find out of this breed is for them and really thinking good and hard about what the next 15+ years of their life will be like with this animal?

Yes, yorkies are adorable and so fun to dress up, shop with, ooh and aah over.. but they are living beings that need exercise, training, love, and most of all acceptance of their unique personalities.

I know we all know this, but it is hard to not become annoyed with people that are rehoming for their own selfishness. I do know that I can get snippy over it, because there are so many un loved, un wanted dogs that die in shelters and people are rehoming over silly reasons, i.e. he's too big too fit in my purse *rolls eyes*.

But, at the end of the day I'd rather see a dog in a home that CHERISHES them, so I try to help where I can...

I think an important factor to consider when analyzing people's responses to these types of threads is that we all know how much we can come to love our "imperfect" yorkies. When responding to these threads, I think a lot of us want to let the poster know how easy it is to overcome the minor problems of size, coat, color, etc.

I don't think anyone is telling people to keep the yorkies they absolutely don't want or can't keep, they're just trying to let them know how easy it is to fall in love with them despite their flaws.

My opinion is that in forums like these, it's always hard to know the whole story. Everyone is responding to partial information the poster offered jaded with our own experience. It's difficult to look at the situation completely objectively and human nature to take the "rehoming" personally. I try really hard to remember that I'm never getting the whole story, because I had one of those stories. I had a Puppy Mill Yorkie that I rescued and was committed 100% to. A few years ago, I simply had to rehome her through Yorkie Rescue. Sometimes there are family issues that aren't addressed in a post along with the typical "housebreaking" or "barking" complaints. The kind of stress that can be associated with a rescue or a puppy mill yorkie - or any behavior that wasn't anticipated - EVEN WHEN YOU ARE PREPARED can be devastating to a family. My marriage suffered a LOT trying to work through Roxie's problems. My husband just was not equipped to deal with her emotional troubles. Her Yorkie Rescue foster mom said that she was one of the worst she'd ever seen. The stress in the household was unbearable. I waited three long years to get Coby, because of the guilt that I felt for having to give her up for the good of my family.

When I posted about Roxie, I did get some "you need to love her unconditionally like she does you" replies. I did love her that much, which is why I had to give her up. She couldn't live in such a stressful household.

Anyway, so I agree. In many cases, it might be the best to find a complete family that can devote themselves together. Sorry to ramble, but having Coby now has reopened the Roxie wounds. I still love her to this day and know that she is now happier in a home with no children, no animals, and stay at home recluse parents who have very little company.

Now, the ones that are disappointed in the SIZE or COLOR - that's another story!! :thumbdown

rehoming
 

I have had to rehome dogs and it was very difficult. There was nothing I could do to change the circumstances. I get a pet for its lifetime and am not concerned with size, shape, color, or health and love them with all my heart. I still think of them and wish it could have been different. There was a divorce many years ago, and a situation with two male dogs not being happy together, and one dog that just wasn't happy being alone while I was at work. I had a responsibility to give them the best life I could and letting them go was the way I had to do it in those circumstances. My heart goes out to anyone who has to rehome a much loved pet. It isn't easy.

I see alot more threads where people are wishing the poster & the dog all the best that have no negativity at all - and only a few that go on for pages and pages - I guess it's all about the REASONS someone is rehoming - I liked what Anna Banana said - I admit I've said a few times that when people obsess about the weight of their yorkie they should be happy if that dog is healthy and not worry - but I'm pretty much giving up on even posting to those kinds of threads anymore - it seems people get too easily offended

Edited to add - I think if someone isnt going to love a dog due to the wrong weight or color - then by all means - find someone who will

but in general I think most people are supportive of rehoming when it's in the dogs best interest -

I think ts the reasons for the rehoming that determine if there are negative responses or not

I feel exactly the same way. I also feel that way about peoplee coming on and whining they are leaving the board. heck, just do it. Don't wait around to see who begs you to stay or not sell your dog. It reminds mee of church. There is a troublemaker in the church and people are praying that God will move them out. When he does, others, not so in tune, go and beg them to stay when God is trying to work all the time. Just an example. If people are wanting to leave, let them go. If they want to sell or rehome their dog, then let them. The little dog will be much better off in a new home where there are no doubts.

Aha, you have touched on a nerve..... I do have a irritation with people BAITING others to encourage or plead with them. But then, I try to hope that it only LOOKS like they're doing that. aarrghh - the perils of forums!! ;)

Not what they expected?
 

What a Great Thread and all the Posts as well! IMO there are some key words
here........Research - before you purchase the Puppy, that means research the Breed as far as their traits and what to expect? Research the Breeder, Research the Bloodline and Pedigree! Look at the Parents etc. Choose the right puppy, not just the smallest or cutest.....you have to live with them?
Committment........once you purchase the Puppy? Train it! Socialize it!
Some People just are not "Dog People", alot of people want a Dog, but just don't have the repoire or even get along with them? Just because you have the money and the right to buy/own any Dog, whether it's a Yorkie or any other Breed does not mean they can? It takes alot of Patience, Knowledge and Time, we all know you have to be consistant as well as dicsiplined.
My younger Sister had a Bichon Fris'e, both my sister and the Dog were miserable for years, she held on to him b/c she paid $800.00 for it......she finally gave him away to a woman in her Church, who was dying of Cancer.
She now has a reason to Live and the her Dog since then has become a
"Therapy Dog", that goes to Hospitals to visit Patients in other Cancer Wards!
If someone wants to "Re-Home" their Pet, they should.....in the long run it's probably better for both? Why should anyone or anything feel un-wanted?
My Sister fell in Love with my male Artie, the last time I saw her, she tried to wait a year and a half for a Puppy, but her Husband got sooooo tired of hearing her whine, he bought her a male Yorkie for Mother's Day, at a local Pet Store out of desperation for $1,800.00 and $2,500.00 out the door with all of his "Accessories". What a "Lesson" in Karma was that?
And now she too is un-Happy with him because he did not turn out as small as she was told by the Store Clerk, as well as he is not the Color she wanted!
And he has no Personality and he gets Carsick (lack of Training).
Now let me get off my "Soap Box", our Dogs are a reflection and an extension
of us, all 3 of my Yorkies, represent ME! And I Love them with all my Heart, so
it breaks my Heart to hear anything Negative from anyone? Even my own Sister. Mine bring me nothing but Joy, even when they wake me up @ 5:30 am. to go pee!

I agree. Re-homing is one thing, selling to pay bills is another. To me it's just like whats best for humans. If a mother truely loves her child BUT has mental issues and cannot soundly raise this child I think we all agree the child is better off and deserves to be fostered or adopted. I commend a mother who genuinely does whats best for the child. What would you say if a mother says well, Im going to sell little Johnny even though I love him so much to pay off my debt. Ummmmm NO thats just not right! Now if Little Johnny isnt getting the love and attention he deserves then by all means, Lil Johnny deserves better so does a Yorkie. I agree there are always certain circumstanes where a dog has to go, and I try not to pass judgement and actually try lending a hand to the person going through this issue. I dont know I think everyong makes a valid point in here, and mean well. The way some of these threads come off wrong to people and canbe bothersome. I think the regulars know who the other regulars are, and even some of the new people you can get to know real fast. Its the people that pop up out of know where starts these threads and as you can see as you read through the thread the OP never even posts again! And here we are all in this major debate about their situation that we dont even know how they turned out.

Example If I started a thread and said I have to rehome Diggy. I can bet my life about 50 people from this board would be reaching out and trying ANYTHING to help me. I mean ANYTHING. There are some great people here and i feel i have found some life long friends. I think people would know I have a serious issue and a major problem for me to consider rehoming him. My thoughts are consider the source and ask lots of questions. The majority of people on here have good intentions! :p

Oh well said on the "research"!! When my children were young and we were getting a puppy, I researched endlessly. Although I wanted a Yorkie, I decided on a Shi Tzu, because they are sooo laid back, require little in the form of exercise, and are lap dogs too. With young children a hectic life, and lots of traveling, I made the right decision. Not until the kids were older did I know it was time for a Yorkie and the work that went with one.

Yorkies are freaking adorable, but they are not right for everyone, even if that just means at this time in their lives.

I second the "RESEARCH" advice!!

Great thread Kim. Thanks for bringing it up!

Whether or not you feel supportive of the rehomer is individual and, I think, depends on the reason. There have been some posters who were possibly looking more for ideas than really rehoming. Some should rehome and trying to talk them out of it doesn't always seem relevant. I'm not sure how I feel about people trying to sell their "I need to rehome" pets here.

I think some of the problem is just how nasty some posters can get.
Being nasty, in any case, is inappropriate. I've just learned that I can unsubscribe from threads that have turned nasty. It makes my YT experience a lot nicer!