If it were me, I would go live in a shelter with my son before I live like you have to live, poor thing. No one should live like a second class citizen, and you and your son are. You do have other options - reach out to a woman's group, get yourself some counseling and find yourself a better life than this. This is a far bigger issue than dog poop. It is your self-esteem and your choice as a woman to stand up for yourself and your child that is at stake.

Being a wife does not make you a piece of property. By law half of everything your husband has is yours (including the trains.) If you don't have it in you to stand up to him then you should consider the advise to get some council. The dog is in a very bad situation but so are you.

If you choose not to keep Snickers please give her to a Yorkie rescue and don't let her be passed from home to home anymore.

Well the next time you go to the restroom and find the seat up, or pee on the floor id demand your husband leaves! How terrible. He has too much control. Thats sickening.

Amen!! To the curb he'd go! I would never allow a man or anyone to control me like that. I'm a rebel by nature. I was in a abusive relationship in high school. Never again! Happily married for 19 years. To a man that respects me.

Agreed! Stand up for yourself, your child and your dog

Ok I'll go away now. I seriously dislike the subject of this thread. Having lived threw an abusive $%&# and running for my life. There is plenty of help out there. Please leave, please.

Say a prayer before you say a word to your husband. Men tend to blow and then be sorry for the idiotic way they acted later on. You must show him you are taking control of that situation. If you have to put a diaper on little Snickers I would do that. Let him know that you are very sorry that happened and you will not let it happen again. If you have to isolate Snickers do that. My Yorkies stay in the kitchen when I am gone so no dog pees on the tile. I will pray for peace to reign in your home and your husband to accept a little crap in his life. All for the love of a dog which is priceless!

I understabd your situation, it's not okay or acceptable, but I understand it.

Please find a nokill or Yorkie specific rescue that will approoruately place this baby in a forever home.

Please do not get anymore pets in your situation.

I hope you seek help for yourself and your son, even nonviolent abusers leave their marks.

Please get help you can't fix a person like this, you can only fix yourself and your situation.

I hope someone here on YT might step up, member, breeder, someone in rescue to take this senior baby and get her the help she needs.

Would you accept that help from a YTer?

Thank you for all your kind words and advice. I appreciate them all. I will not be bringing anymore animals into this place, it's not fair to them and I can't take it anymore.
I am actively looking for work so I can build up some resources. Our son has life threatening medical problems that are expensive.
Unfortunately, where we live there is no women's shelter and no couselling services, they are a 1-2 hr drive away at least.
My husband has a dog himself (who he always refers to as being mine) and a big fat cat that pukes everywhere. I am going to tell him if that cat pukes one more time he's gone.
I am looking to better the situation whether it be by leaving or getting help.
Thank you for your help.

Don't you have women's shelters in the big cities that you could call and ask what to do? Here in American it seems that there are several resources women with dependent, ill children can turn to in order to get out of very bad home situations. Surely there are churches or synagogs in your area that could help direct you to help and counseling - someone to sit down and talk to. Often the religious institutions do have their own women's services and counseling, psychologists. But you need some help in dealing with what sounds like a very tough situation. I cannot imagine a man telling me I have to do anything!!! I just cannot imagine hearing those words. That must be so devastating and belittling for you. Anyone that would talk to his wife that way, "tell her how it's going to be", that sort of thing, is not cherishing that woman in the way he should, not treating her like the true companion and love of his life. He's treating you as if you are a child and you apparently feel you have to do what he says. Try to reach out and find some help where you can for you and your son and also getting that religious help of some kind. Perhaps some men in a church could talk to your husband and get him into some counseling with you while you are job-hunting and trying to set up another situation in the background. I wish you the best in job-hunting and dealing with your difficult life situation. I hope you can find some help and I will be praying for all 3 of you and that little dog of yours.

Praying for you at this time. It must be so difficult living
in that situation. Be safe and stay strong. God bless.

I understand wanting to lash out at your husband, but it's not his pets fault he's an @$$hole. They are just innocent animals. Don't take it out on them. Please try very hard to find a good reputable yorkie rescue for Snickers. One that will find him a forever home that he deserves. I hope your husband can be patient while you at least find this poor elderly, passed around dog a place that will help him. I just don't want him in yet another home that will later on decide they don't want and/or can't keep him either. Poor baby. :(

I hope you can find work and become more independent, but I don't see your husband as a lost cause. Do you know anything about your husband's childhood; was he close to his family? A man who spends most of his time on his trains sounds like he's trying to escape something, and he may be treating you the way he was treated, but he can learn to do better. They say that even if the man won't go into counseling, the woman should go. Counseling can teach you how to make changes in your life that will change the way others treat you. Best of luck!

I am so sorry all of you have to live this way.

I pray you are all able to leave this situation as quickly as possible.

May the Lord watch over Snickers, you and your son and help all of you find a better and safer place to call home.

Oh, I agree, you should not give up on your marriage until you are convinced there is no hope of him changing or he's becoming a danger to you or your son. But living in a shelter for however long is necessary and/or getting counseling is not the same as a divorce - it's just getting yourself out of a second class citizen's lifestyle until you can find some resources for help, work for independence should that become critical to you and find some ways to help you deal with this type individual in a way that makes you less of a victim of his pronouncements and find ways to stay secure.

Perhaps when he sees you are busy finding a better way for yourself and your son, and, indeed, even him, he will start to make more of an effort toward being a better husband and father. Reaching out, moving out of the home, neither mean divorce but those things can provide a break from a stressful situation where one person is being treated as you are. Having a way of independence for you and your son can help you handle your husband differently as well as he perhaps begins to see you differently, starts to try to make some changes. You never can tell what the future might hold for all of you. I hope this time next year, things are far better for everybody.

Prayers for you and your family. Please, please find help, don't put that off, abuse ALWAYS gets worse, unless the family dynamics change.

:bravo::bravo::aimeeyork:bravo::bravo: Heaven forbid if you have a baby, and he throws up, or poops in his pants. What would your husband do???? I am so blessed that my husband and I think the same way...Ian is our baby, and an important part of our family.

If you would like some help in finding where you can go for help, just private message me. To do this just click on my name, and you will see the option to private message (pm) me.

I am so sorry about your situation.

Exactly!

I am a survivor of domestic abuse, it wasnt until it was 'almost' too late before I finally left...20yrs later. Once I left, the amount of help
i received was immesurable! I got councelling for myself and my three kids, financial help, as well as housing help, AND help from law enforcement. I wound up in a shelter for battered women, with my kids. My cousin took in my shih tzu..sadly without my knowledge she gave her away! This act of cruelty was nearly the end of me, I still wonder what happened to her, is she loved, is she safe...how I miss her!
There is help out there, please dont wait...emotional or physical abuse never gets better, it gets far worse, as I found out (the hard way)
Please don't let fear rule you...reach out, there is help out there for whatever your situation may be. Only you can change your way of life, even counselling for yourself and your son is a start.
I pray your situation improves...everyone deserves to be happy...the Lord did not put us here to be miserable/unhappy....my wonderful friend whom I have known for over 30yrs told me that.
She was so right, I finally got it and walked away with my head held high...yes it was the hardest thing I ever had to do...but I survived!
My kids are grown now and I have a man that respects and truly loves me!
Please, Please get help.....

This is not meant to the OP but since it came up...

At what point do we call it dangerous?

Emotional abuse, verbal abuse is still abuse-it's a thin line between it turning violent.

I have been there, it started as sly control, causing self doubt imposed by manipulation, control ranges from imposed guilt to actual threat.

It doesn't always escalate sometimes it goes up and down like a roller coaster of Jeckle& Hyde...but it can all be the entangled web of a sociopath.

Most siciopaths don't use violence or kill, but they're still sociopaths...how do we define degrees of acceptance and tollerance for such abuse.

Look back on my life I've found bruises, broken bones heal fine-its the psychological emotional abuse that leaves the deepest scars.

Anyone feeling they have these issues in their relationships should seek help.

Life is short
 

It should be filled with love ,joy and respect. If your married more then 10 years its alimony and child support and if you son has medical needs you will end up in the house. See an attorney and and don't let him know and see where you stand a good man will not ask his wife to give up her only dog it's not like you have 30 animals and your a hoarder.