Changing "caregivers"
 

I am the general caregiver for all 4 of our dogs. I am having surgery in 3 weeks and that will be followed by radiation and chemo as well as other surgeries in the future. We are in the process of my husband and son taking over more of the care them since I wont be able to as much after surgery, but the dogs seem to be resisting. Is there anything we can do to make the transition smoother for them?

They've stopped eating if my husband or son puts the food in the bowls, yet will eat if I do it, they refuse to go outside with my husband or son and will only go if I go too, and they just seem to be mopey and sad. Some of that could be attributed to them being in touch with us and know that this is a stressful time for all of us, but I worry about them not eating while I'm in the hospital and having treatments. My babies mean the world to me and I don't want them suffering.

My babies are the same way with me But whenever I have had to be in the hospital and have had surgeries, somehow they know I am out of commission & are perfect angels for my DH. Once I'm home no matter what condition I'm in, Lilly & Taylor do want to be in the bed with me & it's as if they think they are taking care of me & neither of them are as pushy about their huggins & pettins as they normally are & they just lay quietly near me keeping an eye on be. My other 3 get more clingy to my DH until I'm feeling better. I would not worry too much as they know when a human family member is not feeling well & will usually seek the attention of another family member.
I will be Praying for a full & speedy recovery for you.

So sorry to hear about you health issues and will keep you in my thoughts. Don't worry about your babies they will adapt. Have you tried standing beside your husband when he is putting the food in the bowls so they can see you ? Let him fill the bowls and put them down and you can talk to them while he does this. Once they accept this you can stop talking but still stand there and them move a bit away and so on until hubby is doing it in his own. Might work if you do it a bit at a time. Good luck.

So sorry that you are dealing with health issues. I would suggest that when your hubby and son are "taking care" of the babies that you go upstairs or to your room or maybe out for a short walk. I say this because with my 2, hubby doesn't exist when I'm in the room.

If I'm upstairs (the upstairs is gated off) they are either on the sofa next to or on hubby. lol But as soon as I come back into the family room, boom, they are right there with me. As for feeding them, I know mine eat better when I sit in the kitchen with them, does your husband/son stick around or do they just put the food down and go away? Try having them sit or stay around where the food is and see if this makes a difference.

I'm sure they can sense things going on with you. I know that you are concerned for their well being but I'm sure they will be just fine. Good luck with your surgery and hope you have a speedy recovery. Hugs.

They are pretty intuitive - they will 'know' that you are not well. The only thing you should worry about it your health! Good Luck!!

I am sorry you are having health issues and will keep you in my prayers. The first time I left my 4,Pixie wouldn't eat. That lasted 1meal then she was fine. I think they will adjust pretty quickly.

I am so sorry for your health issues. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. As far as your pups, I really do think it is a difficult transition for them. When my son was in the hospital, I stayed the whole time with him. Mikki did fine. But Rosie had a very hard time. I will say that after a day or two, Rosie did eat and go potty for DH. She acted not happy but she did finally start doing her routine. I will add a smooth transition for them to my prayers as well. (((Hugs)))

Michelle I understand what your going thru as I went thru the same thing you are going thru 7 years ago.
Mine didn't eat much when I was in the hospital. But when I came home, my hubby was there and prepared the food, I was a able to put the food down for them, and they didn't have a problem with that. I know things will difficult for time especially with those drains in. I had two of them.
My hubby works overseas, so he wasn't here when I went through Chemo and radiation. Once the drains were removed I didn't have a problem with preparing the food.
All my babies at the time were very in touch with what was going on.
Also don't be surprised of they back away from you on the day of chemo as they can smell it on you.
Mine loved to lay in bed in with me.
Please know many prayers are going out for you.

Some dogs are just creatures of habit. Your husband may have to take one out on a leash and try to get the others to follow. It may take a while for them to give in and accept the new arraingements but hopefully everyone can be patient and get into the new way things have to go.

My prayers are with you for a speedy and comfortable recovery.

You've already gotten some great advice, so I just wanted to wish you the very best with your surgery and the treatments to follow. You are in my thoughts and prayers:love:

I am so sorry you must go thru this. Please don't worry the pups will
be fine. Sending you hugs and prayers. Please keep us updated on your
progress.

What about lifting after the mastectomy? I know they don't weigh much but were you able to pick them up okay??

This has thrown our world for a loop, I really hate that it will interfere with the dogs lives too!

Thank you all for the prayers and positive thoughts.

I will try some of the things mentioned and see if they do better. Luckily we still have a few weeks to try and figure it out.

At the time the only one I couldn't pick up was my late Lizzie. She weighed 11 pounds. As for the others I had at that time if I had to pick them I did so very carefully.
Also every day I did range of motion exercise. Once the drains were pulled were it so much easier.

Your babies will adjust. Mine did really well.

I'm here if you have any questions.

My Doberman used to do this.

If I was away for just a weekend he wouldn't eat. It's like they know who the caregiver is and it's almost like a form of anxiety where they can't eat till the Mommy gets back home.

IDK, I always thought it was so odd because he had a wonderful, playful, loving relationship with his Daddy. But I was the one who mainly fed him.

On the flip side, he was known to chew on the remote control if his Daddy was gone.:D

Thank you. I'm quickly learning now much the yorkie talk members care about their other members and have been touched beyond words by the well wishes and actions of others.

I told another member I don't have a huge support system, so every person in my corner means the world to me. We will get through this. I just worry more about my dogs right now than I do losing both my breasts and my hair, as strange as that sounds.

YT is the best support group. I will keep you in my prayers. My DH is battling lung cancer and we are gone 3 x a week for 4-8 hours and the dogs adjusted. They are so happy to see me when I'm home now.

I will add you and your husband to my prayers as well. :)

You do have a huge support system! The members here at YT. :) We will pray you through this. God can move mountains! Your babies will adjust. They are going to be well taken care of. You are a strong woman and will get through this. (((Hugs)))

I was in the hospital three times last fall - once for a week, once for two weeks & once for four days. Tibbe fasted at first but after a couple of days of picking at his food, losing his potty training at my son's home, etc., my son said he came around & got back into a routines. He sensed something was very wrong & wouldn't leave my side when ill before the hopsitalizations so we knew he was upset already before I left yet he did adjust each time. Yorkies are pretty smart dogs & do seem to have remarkable ways of adjusting once they get the lay of the land as changes in their lives occur.

I've been wondering about your surgery as I'd thought I'd read you were to have it in May but am so glad you are getting it soon.

Please know I've been praying for a complete recovery for you since I read that you were getting the insurance & going to have the surgery. I was my mother's caregiver when she had a total mastectomy at age 71 in 1981 and was her PT coach IH & at home as she was convalescing. Her doctor told her that she had better motion in her shoulder than any of his other mastectomy patients near her age, attributing it to all the PT she did.

I pray your little Yorkies adjust well & that your surgery, recovery & all of the treatment will go as smoothly as possible. May the Lord bless & keep you in His Loving Arms throughout your journey back to health.

We were originally supposed to have it the beginning of June but had to push it back to July because of insurance (ridiculous stuff that we all need and are at the mercy of!!). We will be doing a lung biopsy at the same time, and just did genetic testing to see about BRCA genes, since I have siblings and kids. Waiting to hear back from those results so the family can have theirs done too. All the waiting is worse than anything.

I've had two breast surgeries myself (reductions) and the guideline they gave me was not to lift anything heavier than 5 lbs, or a gallon of milk.

Still sending up prayers for a quick recovery for you, and successful treatment:hands:

Did you have to have drains for those?

My dr has discussed exercises to do after the surgery to help with building up strength and maintaining range of motion. Luckily only Darby is over 5 pounds, and he doesnt like to be picked up so that won't be a problem.

Yes, I had drains both times. Honestly they weren't bad at all. Kind of gross when I had to empty them, and it was a relief to get them removed. It just felt less restrictive. I had to empty them into a measuring container and record the amount, and then when it fell below a certain amount per day, the surgeon removed them. You'll be glad that you have them when you see how much fluid actually accumulates, just imagine your poor body trying to re-absorb all that fluid! The swelling would be incredibly worse without them.

There is a website that really helped me so much when I went through my surgeries. It's mostly for reduction and implant patients, but you can get some great tips for dealing with recovery, from patients that have been there. It's Welcome to BreastHealthOnline - Bringing women better breast care through knowledge and support I used to work as a volunteer there but got kind of burnt out on talking about boobs all the time:laugh: The site owner is a wonderful, caring lady. I hope that you'll visit there, even if you don't join in the discussions, just to take in all the great info they have on surgical recovery. The "Healing Diet" really is wonderful too. Also the Lemon Tea (juice of one lemon in one cup of hot water, sweetened to taste) really helps with the swelling. Of course, you should ask your doctors if there are foods/beverages you should avoid while undergoing treatment later on, but otherwise this stuff is all time-tested and very safe and healthy:)

If you have any questions or concerns that you feel silly calling the surgeon about, you can always PM me and I'll do my best to help you out;) Hugs and continued prayers for you:love:!!!

we recommend that tea to pregnant moms at our birth center, for swelling! Also cantaloupe and honeydew melons. They help with exxcess fluid.

I'll check out the site. My surgeon is wonderful! He gave me his cell number and told me to call anytime I have questions. I have never used it, and I'm sure I never will but I feel better knowing he cares about his patients that much. We make lists and lists of questions to ask when we go in and we record appointments to we can listen to them later in case we don't remember an answer.

That sounds like one fantastic surgeon:)!!! It is kind of rare for a surgeon to have a caring manner, they are usually machines:laugh:I had my doc's cell number too, and I only used it once when I got sick from the anesthesia later that day and thought I'd busted my stitches:p (I was fine, and he talked to me for over an hour to make sure that all was well)

I love the idea of recording the visits, that is so smart! Seems that you are in extremely capable hands and I feel like you're going to come through this with flying colors:love:

Nothing to add but prayers for you and your loved ones as you go thru this difficult time. Prayers for healing and peace.

Praying for you Michelle.

I had a good scare back in Dec and had to be sent to the Cancer Center in Ann Arbor for surgery to remove the 3 large Tumors. I was there 4 days and then laid up several weeks.

My husband had to take over complete responsibility for the dogs. I had family come stay at my house while we were there for the 4 days. The dogs did "ok" but I have one who did not do to well and is a complete mess now when I just walk out the door. She has developed such a strong attachment to me now.

When I got home from the hospital I had to be walked in and no one could touch me, but my husband held her so she could see me and she literaly scream cried for like a 1/2 hr. Its funny how we don't really know how much they love us. She's the only one who had an issue with everthing and the others adjusted well.

I think your babies will miss you while they are being cared for by someone else but I think they will be fine :)

YOU take care of yourself...but I will tell you...they sure are little healers :) I don't know what I would have done without my babies getting me through my ordeal.

Breny,

Thank you. Just so you know, Westley is my little cuddle bug. He has to constantly be touching mom, regardless of what the others are doing, he wants treats, food, and toys right beside us at all times!! He makes me laugh because he will sit on my lap and hubby will blow on the back of his ears and he will roll over and bury his head in the pillows, then pop up and want more, it's a hilarious game they play every night while we watch tv. He's a dream!!

Aww Westley sounds like a wonderful pup. He will be by your side to help you in healing. Prayers & best wishes to you all.