I have had it with the bullying
 

Sadie is the sweetest, most submissive dog outside the house, and is sweet to everyone inside the house, except Joey, and I need advice. Sadie is obsessed, and that's putting it mildly, with stalking him, blocking his way, and making sure to grab every toy from him. He is very strong and hangs on to the toy, but she is much bigger, and ends up dragging Joey with the toy in his mouth across the room. Sometimes she bites him when they are both running to greet me when I get home or when they are going to greet a visitor at the door. Sometimes they have an out and out doggie fight and I separate them. Sometimes she is roughhousing with him, but in a love/hate way which usually ends up with him squealing and me separating them. I feel like all I do is yell at her during these times. Am I supposed to let them duke it out. Joey is very happy and not neurotic at all, but I am so tired of her bullying him. None of my neighbors believe me because outside she is a mush who rolls over on her back with every dog she sees.

Sorry to tell you this, but your yelling is only adding to the situation. I recently spoke to an animal behaviorist and she says that the best way to handle these situations is to quietly walk away when you see that there is building tension between them. They interpret your yelling as just another dog adding to the tension. So, just take a deep breath and walk away. The babies will follow you and the tension will be gone.
Also, they have to sort out the dominance issue for themselves. If the older one is growling and showing teeth when the other dog is being irritating, the other dog is merely teaching the dog what appropriate behavior is.
Don't interfere with the dominance/submission issue. They have to sort it out for themselves. By asserting your idea of who should be in charge, you are only prolonging the inevitable and making the process very stressful. The more dominant dog will continue to try to be dominant and will eventually be, so just leave them to sort it out for themselves.
Of course, use your judgement with the dogs, but don't freak out or yell at them (I know it is hard). Let them sort it out.

Good luck.

I'm having the same issues with my two. I went back to square one and started really practicing basic obedience with both together. My male used to rush the gate when going out for a walk and attack the female when I had to stop to close the gate. The first day was rough, but they did good. The forth day my mind was elsewhere and they did it anyway. I was so shocked and proud! I think it's important to distract them before things escalate too far... you don't need any preventable Vet bills.

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Good post. As I was reading this I was thinking about when my kids were little. They'd start fussing only when I was in the room so instead of playing referee I would ignore them and walk away. When they figured out I wasn't going to get involved they'd usually quit. I would think the same thing would work for the furkids.

So we should just let the dogs fight it out?!?

It must be the name!! I have a Sadie also. She isn't submissive...She is Alpha. Sadie was 2yrs old when we got Lillie...Lillie was only 1.6 lbs when we got her...VERY VERY tiny. Sadie would sniff her and wouldn't leave her alone but, she never tried to bite her....until Lillie got comfortable and wanted to play..Sadie wanted no part of her. Sadie tends to be dog aggressive. She has accepted Lillie as part of the family now. However, she will growl, snap and jump at her. Sadie is only 1 lb bigger than Lillie (now 2yrs old) but, that 1 lb makes a big difference in these little dogs. If Lillie starts the reverse sneezing Sadie will run to her and snap at her. If Lillie should cry out for some reason, Sadie will attack her!!:eek: I have had to grab her by the back of the neck and pull her off of her...This doesn't happen very much anymore. I didn't know what to do either. I would also yell at her (which I NEVER yell at her) and as the other poster said...this is wrong...just makes things worse. I would not walk away from them. I would NOT be able to let Sadie beat on Lillie! I had a trainer tell me that Lillie needs to snap back at her to let her no that isn't acceptable....Lillie will never do that...she is the sweetest little thing you could imagine. What I would do when this happened is pick up Lillie and sit on the couch with her. I wouldn't let Sadie near us. If she got up on the couch I would put her on the floor and say NO! If she tried to go after Lillie again I would just stand there and keep telling her NO! This eventually worked. Sadie and Lillie will play and even sleep together...although Sadie want cuddle with Lillie. Sadie has gotten much better with Lillie. I can leave them alone all day and they get along just fine. I would NOT let them fight it out!! This is just MO!

Good Luck and don't give up!
Brenda

I need to clarify that there is a size differential. Sadie, while a thin, wiry dog is at least twice the size of Joey. He's a little 3 1/2 pound muffin. If she is pulling him bythe ear and he is squealing, then I have to intervene. I need to do it calmly and I guess I need to teach them some behavior modif. but I can't afford a trainer right now. Also, it's not like they can't be together. Sometimes they sleep side by side or both on my lap on the couch. It just seems that Sadie's aggression has heightened a little lately. I feel like she is a jealous older sibling, but I don't know if it's accurate to attribute human attitudes to pups.

I just saw your post which crossed with mine. I try to do the couch thing too, but that seems to escalate Sadie's behavior. She starts jumping 3 feet in the air and trying to snap at him. She never bares her teeth or growls. I get the feeling she just enjoys tormenting him like an older sibling would do to a younger. Does that sound crazy?

I am sorry but you should not let the fight it out. One tooth in the right place you have a dead dog!!!!! They could lose an eye or break a leg. You should not over react, but go back to being the pack leader. Which you are not at this time. You need to have strong deep voice saying no, remove the dog that has the problem. If you have a crate use it as time out.

For as what someone said about kids handling it on the own, maybe small things but no hits. That would be time for the parent to step in. If you are not you must be the parent that has the kids running and acting a fool all over Walmart.

I just can't belive you all would think it is ok to let dogs fight!!! Even small yorkies and kill each other. (A friend of mine lose her dog that way, two females got in a fight when she was at work) One tooth hole to the head. Something to think about!!!

I am having some of these issues now and I just read an excellent post! We just got another dog, which is a puppy, of course this pup is three times the size of Stormy but I noticed when I interfere with the dogs when they are "arguing", it lasts longer then if I turn my head the other way. This will usually be over a bone/toy or sometimes the pup just goes up to Stormy and kind of pushes her nose into her side or something just to get her going, if I ignore it and Stormy tells her how it is, it quickly ends! But of course I am not leaving them unattended and not supervising! Stormy was here first and she is showing the new dog the rules.

Yesterday the new pup got very playful running and jumping around after a ball. Stormy was NOT having it, she was SOO mad, she started to chase and growl at the puppy and became quite snippy until the puppy calmed down. This is her house and it's quiet in here and peaceful, shes not used to another playful puppy running around. I can tell though that the pup respects Stormy and leaves it at that.

I just want to clarify that I am not letting them fight, they don't "fight". My two simply will annoy the other and usually what happens is Stormy starts showing her teeth and getting a bit snippy and barking. At that point is when the puppy will back off and go do something else.