Can You Love Them Too Much?
 

Right now, I am laying across my bed on my laptop and Silvia is curled up under my chin and serving as a little pillow. Every once in a while, she will make that little sighing noise and lick my cheek.

I don't have any children, it's just me, DH, two cats, Silvia and several saltwater fish in my house. We have tried to have children for four years, but to no avail. And now, as I'm sitting here, I have finally come to the conclusion that..........I don't really care if I ever have skin kids, because I don't think I could ever love anything more than I do this little girl cuddled up to me. Maybe I'm a sucker, but I'm even tearing up right now just thinking about how much I love her...........it almost hurts, if that makes sense. Am I alone in this.......or possibly unstable? LOL

No, you're not alone. :luvu:

Totally understandable! LOL. I've always had dogs growing up in the family but Jackson is truly MY first dog that is all ... mine. And I love him so much. As if he were my own child. My e-mails I send out to family & friends are usually weekly updated pics of Jackson, lol. I talk about him as if he's my own kid. I seriously love him so much! He can be SUCH a stinker sometimes but I love him nonetheless. He's the best thing that's happened to me in a while! I needed the responsbility that comes with caring for a dog and I couldn't be happier with him, he's so smart, learned tricks so fast, and is such a cool companion.

You're not alone at all. I think people like us (who love our animals like our own children) are lucky. We feel a love that others can't. It just makes life that much better.

No
 

I don’t think you can love them too much, as long as your life is balanced and you are not obsessive about it. I get so much joy when a yorkie is sitting on my lap and looking up at me, or just taking a nap on my shoulders while I type, or even going for a walk or playing fetch. What I hate is the way they wait at the door when you have to go away on travel for a few days, it's so sad!

Allow me the state the obvious; they are not kids. I don't like it when people refer to dogs as "furkids." They will not help you when you are too old to help yourself. They will not have grandchildren you can play with, and you will never be proud of them for getting into grad school. On the other hand, the most you can get upset about with a yorkie, is their incessant barking or maybe chewing something up - they won't smash the car or stay out all night! The worst thing about them, though, is they don't live long enough, and when they pass away, part of us goes with them. So go ahead and love your yorkie as much as you can, because they will still love you even more back :)

Oh yeah, I agree with the last sentence. Even though I TREAT Jackson like he's my child... I'm still in college and young and do not have children of my own. But I would never choose to have only a dog over real children. Nothing can top the love of a child. I think if you think you love your dog that much.... wait until you have your OWN kids.

Well, I'm glad I'm not a complete idiot! :D I don’t consider myself obsessive about it, and I do feel as if my life is balanced right where it is. And the hardest thing you mentioned, about them waiting at the door when you have to go away, being sad, Silvia's not that way. I guess she's like an independent version of that, cause she licks me goodbye and then goes and gets in one of her many beds around the house and goes to sleep, or aggravated the cats. :rolleyes:

As far as real children are concerned, I see both of your points, that a puppy can never replace a child, but because I can never have children, I guess what I'm saying is that I am OK with just the love of a dog. I used to get depressed thinking about the things mentioned, such as who will take care of me when I'm old, having grandkids, etc. But, there's not much I can do about that, so I'm considering my great love for Silvia as a great consolation prize! ;)

Definitely not alone. I love Sasha pretty much more than I love anything and to be honest, I feel the same way about the "skin kid" situation as well. I'm young still of course, but Sasha is my everything in life right now.

Oh girlie.. you are so not alone.. I have and love my furbutts.. and worry over them every bit as one worries over a child.. yes I had one child.. and I have lost yorkies also.. and call me silly.. but I have to have more to love so I never ever again in my life time am ever in a position to want to die also after losing a yorkie I so loved...
When you have many and lose one it is devestating..I was so broken and with him being 5.. it hurt worse and he was not to die so young.. my babies are my kids my life...


welcome to the club... anne

You are definitely not alone. People who do not have the same love are missing out on something huge...

While I am sitting here, I cannot understand how I could ever love a child as much as my Couver. While I understand that people who have kids feel differently... I feel that my Couver is here with me no matter what, and my children will grow up and move away. But for as long as Couver lives, he will be right by my side- my loyal companion. I do not think you get the same feeling from a child. One is not better than the other, they are just different types of love :)

I have a disabled teenaged son... And also a single parent since his birth nealy 16 years ago... AND I am also fully disabled. Suzi is my first Yorkie. She is now a yr old. I have had her since she was 8 weeks. She is my daughter:) Also my service dog, and my little treasure. My baby girl, and in my eyes a princeses , however, at times I will admit in disquise she can be a terror too, LOL. I adore her to pieces. LIfe has forever changed since Suzi has come home. She's funny, smart, and too cute! I am in love with her and miss her like crazy when I am not with her even for a short while, I wonder what she is doing, or if she is ok. ;)

Thanks for the reply, I was not trying to be disrespectful in stating the obvious, I just don’t like it when people assume my dogs are psychological compensation for having no kids (to me they are in two entirely different categories of things you can love). My woman can't have kids either and it’s something I won't dwell on as well, what would be the point?

I think yorkies are the cutest most adorable things in the world, and I am a guy, incidentally (who has always played for the right team). When I was a kid, I loved little terriers but never got to own one since my parents were not pet people. I would always have to be the terrier in Monopoly, and Toto was my favorite character in Oz. Now I would never go back to having no dog (and Yorkies are the best, as I’m sure you’d agree)!!! :aimeeyork:aimeeyork

Should have read this before I last posted to this thread. Your last sentence makes a lot of sense to me :thumbup: (although I would not want to argue the point in mixed company - maybe I'm just repressed).:rolleyes:

Oh, I never took your comment as disrespectful in any way! :D I only responded to make my previous comment not seem so harsh. I didn't want people to think I was choosing to have a dog over a child, I just wanted to point out that I cannot have children and the choice is already made, and I'm quite content with it, cause I :luvu: me some Silvia! LOL

No, I don't think that you can love them too much. I sometimes just look at them and feel so blessed and loved that they are in my life. I could not imagine my life without them. ;)

You are not alone....

My life is complete with Roxy and TJ. I thought for a brief moment about 5 yrs ago that I would want (1) skin kid, but as time is passing, and I am learning more about ME and what I want...I am thinking NO to skin kids...Like I said, I absolutely 100% feel my life is complete now with Roxy and TJ. Sure I don't know what it feels like to have skin kids, but that's ok, bc I know that I won't miss something *if* I don't know what it feels like...Kinda like how I never knew what it would feel like to have pets, BUT now I do, so it WILL hurt not to have them...

I like life simple, that's what me a DH have now...maybe it is selfish, but I am such a worrier and there are so many crazy things that can and do happen with parents and skin kids and honestly...I just don't feel like going thru the *raising motions* - I can really start to stress out right now thinking about ALL those years of school work, after school activities, and then the dating and possible smoking, drugs and alcohol....NO THANKS - Yorkies Rule ;)

...but this is just how I feel - of course everyone has their own lives to lead :D

I agree with several of the posts including the original post. I have two children, a son and a daughter, however due to a genetic blood disorder I was told that if I didn't have my children young I never would be able to. I am so glad that I have them, as when I was 25 I had to have a complete hysterectomy, strangely not for the previously mentioned blood disorder but because of cancer. Strange how life seems to work out that way huh?

While my daughter was a baby and toddler it was easier to not become depressed about not being able to have any more children as I had my hands full with her. However as they both grew up, and became more independent I started having "baby blues".

I became severely depressed, my mother realizing this bought my Shiloh for me as a birthday gift. I had never owned a dog before but I immediately fell in love with him and he has soothed the ache in my heart. I would not know what to do without him. My children are my miracles, but so is Shiloh, they remind me every day how much I am loved and it brings me great joy in returning that love to them. I count myself lucky to have the best of both worlds, the love for my children and my Yorkie but for those who have just their darling pups I am happy for them as well, everyone deserves a little bit of sunshine in their life.

as a woman with no kids, i will say that my lexi has surely replaced
the children that i wasnt able to have. and as for gettin old and children
helping you out,,,, there are alot of kids in this world that dont help their
parents and cant be bothered. so for me, lexi is my child that i never had and
im happy with just her.... i love her more than anything in this world

No Way! No How!:) You cannot love them too much. And there is nothing wrong with them being your babies. ;) I have one skin kid and I feel like the love for my fur babies is very different for the love of my little girl. I was pretty young when I brought my sweet Emmie into this world, and since then have decided that 1 child is enough for me, and hubby. Copper and Maddie are going to be me babies for their whole lives. They complete that part of me that wants to continue to nurture and care for something. I don't feel like I could ever love them too much.

I feel the same way about my yorkie and doxie. I can't have kids, I have 3 stepsons, but they already have a mom, I treasure them, but can't baby them, so it is furkids for me, I have no choice either. We are lucky to have them, and I think it makes us more compassionate people because of them!

I love my Humphrey more than anything. I am in my early 20's been married for almost one year and neither my husband nor I are particularly keen on babies, we're not baby people. I never had dogs growing up and I never wanted one either. I graduated from college last year, finished an internship, became unemployed and got depressed so I went and got Humphrey to keep me company, as dh is a doctor and works very long hours.
At first it was fun, then puppy training was a nightmare, we decided we could not keep him after three weeks, put him up for adoption, the family decided they coldn't keep him, we took him back... enrolled him in puppy classes, took him out for long walks, he started crying in his sleep, we began letting him sleep in bed with us, started taking him to friends' houses, interviewing potential nannies to take care of him while we went on a holiday, buying him clothes at Harrod's, cooking for him, and laughing at his farts, burps and crazy antics. I got a job and after a few months decided i was going to do it part time so that Humphrey wouldn't have to stay home alone for too long...
Then a couple of weeks ago as I was kissing him I saw what appeared to be a blister in his eye, called DH, freaked out, started crying because I thought he was partially blind, called the vet, begged her for an appt within 30 mins, cancelled plans, rushed him to the vet centre only to find out it was a lint from his blanket. If thats not what crazy in love mothers do, then I dont know what is.
We love this little monster to bits.

:yelrotflm How funny! What we do for our little ones!

I'm the mother of 4 grown children and know of the intense love you have for your children especially when they're babies. After they have grown you still have that same love but you are not needed as much. You know your children still love you the same but since you have done your job as a parent they don't need you. I can honestly say that I love Piper and (Chipper RIP) that same way I loved my babies. The love is intense and they need you to be happy and tend to their needs. They also show you a lot of love in return. I do have one 15 month old grandson that I don't see often because he lives 7 hours away. I love him dearly but he doesn't need me and I miss out on his every day care. The only bad thing in loving our babies so intensely is they have a shorter life span than ours. So when it is time for them to cross the rainbow bridge it's very hard to let go. They take a little piece of your heart with them.

There is no way they can be overloved. I have 1 son getting ready to turn 23 who I love with all my heart (and wallet!). But I also loved my little Yorkie as much in a different way. My 7 year old Dachsie and 7 month old YorkiePoo are also completely loved. My DH lays on the floor with the Dachsie when it is time for him to eat or he won't eat! Spoiled? Yes. Loved? Unconditionally.

Skin kid is always wanting SOMETHING. Fur kids only want love and attention. They are all so spoiled but we would not have it any other way.

There are no ways that these little sweethearts be loved too much .

I give the best of the best to my adored little rescued ones . I have a door sign that says " Finish the bad life , welcome to a home of love and attention ".