I found one way with mine was to talk to them one-on-one and look them straight in the eye .... force eye contact if you must. They realize that you are sincere in your feelings for them and soon they will be just as sincere with you. It takes lots of patience and many talks to bring about their trust, but it certainly worked for me. It's not easy when you have noone to help, but you can teach them that by sticking together that all of you can make it better and have such a wonderful life! Three very important rules that I used for
me ... I never raised my voice ... I never corrected them in front of others and I never left the correction/discussion for later! My son is 44 now and he told me once that it meant so much to him to have our "conversations" in private and they had so much more impact! One of his friends' Mom was a screamer and never missed an opportunity to correct him in front of others. I have been heartbroken many times because I heard her do it and saw the crushed expression on his face as he just looked like he wanted to disappear. I still see him occasionally and he still gives me a big bear hug, tells me he loves me and proudly says "this is my
MOM"!! It gives you a pretty good feeling. Sorry to ramble, but it just means so much to keep an open dialog with your kids. Once you can establish the one-on-one with them, then just like Kelly said, the Family Pow Wow is wonderful. Hopefully, they will feel part of a unit and not alone in this nasty old world, and makes such a difference!
