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I agree with others, she's probably just exhausted and is catching up on feeling safe and secure again. Btw, you sound like *such* a great Momma - taking such attentive care to her, what a blessing she is now with you  .
On the sister in law, she needs to chillax. What if she had a special needs child or someone who had behaviors that were challenging and inappropriate? You'd probably be the first to understand and be compassionate. She, in return, can choose to be accepting, accommodating, and compassionate toward your situation too. Goes both ways, with all family members, right??!!
In future, you could either stay at a hotel like you said and/or bring along an x-pen or Iris Pen (Amazon or Walmart) to give her a safe area to be when you can't be right with her and/or hold her.
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I have nothing to add but made me smile just thinking of the love you have for your baby. There are too many that have these precious little ones and dont give a hoot for their feelings!
I have yet to leave my Spice overnight. But I do know on the rare occasions I have not been able to take her with me and have been gone 2-3 hrs when I come home she will jump all over me and love me and then after a little of that it is almost like she punishes me for leaving her for the next 8 hrs!! LOL Then she is back to herself. But again I have never left her for longer than a couple hours when I have had a Dr appt and she couldnt go.
I wish you the best in whatever you find that works and bless you for caring so much ♥